"... about not being on their phones too much and being present in the moment.... The rest, however, are absorbed in their devices. They are playing Words with Friends, Candy Crush and card games, often with the volume turned up. They are looking at the news, checking sports scores, scrolling Facebook and texting. Some are even using them as actual phones. 'Phone calls are the worst,' says Richard Husk, a parent of two. 'They will take a 45-plus-minute phone call with some random golf buddy while I am over with the kids trying to visit with them.' Tyler McClure said his mom is on Facebook constantly and can’t do anything without her phone, while his dad 'Googles the things he’s watching on television as he watches television.'... Many people we spoke to said their parents enjoy reading things out loud from their phones, telling their families or anyone nearby about the weather, the headlines or viral stories that may or may not be true...."
Reading the news and reading things out loud that you think ought to be shared – that's what my grandfather used to do. He was born in 1899, and the news was in the newspaper. Of course, there was only one copy of the newspaper in the house, and he was the one with the claim to the front section. He'd be sitting in his chair in the corner of the living room, newspaper open in front of his face, and he applied his own standards to what ought to be heard by the rest of us. No one ever considered that this might be some sort of old-man, out-of-it habit that the younger people should mobilize to fix!
And thank God if your aging parent has friends. How dare you characterize your father's friend as "random"? If someone is his friend, that person is not random. I think this Husk fellow ought to think about what he's doing when he's "over with the kids trying to visit with" his father. Maybe dad is trying to give Husk the clue that the visit has gone on too long. Are you there for a few hours, or are you visiting for days? I don't know, but I don't think you should disrespect your father in the newspaper like that.
I wish my father were still alive, spending too much time on the phone or not. And I would love to hear Pop (my grandfather) read selections from the Wilmington Morning News again.
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56 comments:
This could be really funny on a reboot of All in the Family.
The word “meathead” will be replaced by “nerd nugget”.
I'm Gen X and I wish my parents were still able to do things like play Candy Crush or google things. They are both declining cognitively, and struggle to find things to occupy their minds. Their own phones baffle them. My dad almost unable to make a call and my mom struggles to tell the difference between email and text, and waits for my visits to close web pages and apps she has inadvertently opened.
Having seniors who can use their phones to amuse themselves is a blessing!!!
"I don't think you should disrespect your father in the newspaper like that."
OK, but what are we doing as a society to cultivate respect? Anything at all? And what's dissing in a newspaper when people hang friends and family out to dry continuously on social media?
I see what they did...
I'm a mid-range boomer (same age as Althouse) and my millennial kids are upset with me that I don't carry my cell phone with me at ALL times, even when in our house. We still have a land line (with extensions throughout the house), but they will call or text me on the cell phone and want a response NOW!
Are there really 100 millennials and Gen Xers in the US (or was it broader internationally) and just how was this survey accomplished? On cell phones? If so, I sayy the 50% "parents not good" response is bogus.
Mom and dad left us home alone with TV and video games growing up, and now won't spend time with us away from their phones. Big surprise.
Before the smart phone people worked the crossword, read the paper, answered the landline, and went to the encyclopedia set when they had a question. Just because all of that is now contained in one device, it's still the same behavior. This article's sole function is Boomer-hate.
Hell yeah! That's me. But not with family around.
Except for the one stepkid who never really interacted with me in 30 years anyway. I gave her the phone treatment last week and still conversed with her more than she ever has with me. Like talk/listen/respond sort of convo.
Moment-to-moment life was pretty boring before internet and phones.
Could be worse, we could all be playing with ourselves. I mean, playing PC or console based video games, with headphones and microphones and immersive VR headsets. The kids would starve.
The kids would also starve if we were all playing with ourselves, or each other, all the time.
Laslo really needs to describe this.
A reversal of the usual cliché. Noah Baumbach's While We're Young with Ben Stiller, dramatized something similar with the aging boomer/Xer couple trying their best to stay ahead of the new technology meeting a younger couple that had given up on technology and "devices." From what I see on the subway, though, the stereotype of young people glued to their phones is accurate.
I did something radical and proposed a game night with another couple, I left my phone in the car and three of us played, and one watched a movie and scrolled his phone almost the whole time.
Come to think of it, before cell phones, I always had a paperback in my hip pocket.
I am proud to not own or be sucked in by a cell phone.
I remember my grandpa always reading the newspaper.
He was Greatest Generation.
If it ain’t the phone, it’s something. And nothing really wrong with that something.
Gen-selfie.
My mother is on her phone constantly at age 74- playing Candy Curse and Bubble Bitch, or surfing our family and friends Facebook pages, or reading an e-novel of some sort. I don't begrudge her this because she isn't physically able to get out and about as much as she could 10 years ago. I think her activities on her smart-phone/pad are a huge net benefit for her mentally- if she weren't doing this, she would just be watching television most of the waking hours (the TV is on 24 hours a day anyway). And, I hope this has contributed a great deal to her still keen mental acuity- I don't detect any dementia at all- she is far more mentally capable than President "Shit for Brains" Biden, and Senator Festerneck.
I've got the cheapest flip-phone I could get, and use it only for calls, texts, and the occasional photo that I can't download. I delete MMS messages since MMS costs money. The other cool features get virtually no use.
My wife OTOH is a smartphone addict. Highly active across many platforms, constantly sending and receiving with friends, family, and strangers around the globe. (She's a tad Althousey in that way, but without the wide interests and inexhaustible energy.)
The two of us, our son, and my brother ate out last night and all of the three-who have and use smartphones a lot--were actually pretty good about stashing them away.
At the beginning of the concert later, the conductor made sure everyone had their phones on mute. Many in the audience and some of the performers had to check.
Yancey,
Nice comment.
And you’re right that much of smartphone time has just replaced TV time.
No wonder TV, overall, has got better. It has to compete.
I really miss the days when the newspaper was worth reading. The dailies now, where they even still exist, are anemic and filled with bland, generic writing about mostly national news. Not that I want creative writing essays as news articles, but they used to have some recognizable voice. Now everything is USA Today except for the local commie weeklies.
I really miss the days when the newspaper was worth reading. The dailies now, where they even still exist, are anemic and filled with bland, generic writing about mostly national news. Not that I want creative writing essays as news articles, but they used to have some recognizable voice. Now everything is USA Today except for the local commie weeklies.
Ungrateful whelp. Nuff said. (Now that response is straight from geezerdom,) And my observation is that cell phone addiction is spread across all age groups.
I put down the WaPo to make time for family.
Whatever floats your boat. Social gatherings require paying attention to the guests. It’s rude to ignore them in favor of an iPhone. But in everyday life there’s a burden on guests to be engaging in interesting topics. To some gossip seems powerfully interesting. To others it’s a hateful activity to be patiently endured. The bottom line may be that some people’s brains have an actual need for intelligent words to structure an interesting world. ( Like typical Althouse lovers.)
And a flood of new interesting stuff has become digitally available just in time for retirement. I Noticed yesterday that my Audible library now contains 683 books that can be listened to over and again. And many are by authors that were introduced to me by The Professor. And then along came YouTubes with a Jordan Peterson fix, followed by the Joe Rogan Experience interviews on Spotify.
Good thing God made earphones so that my exercise time will increase.
I'm reading all the time and my kids are in California, 500 miles away. No complaints.
It's likely the phone calls that are throwing them. I've had several people feel offended when I would "interrupt" their call to tell the goodbye when they picked up a call that was prolonged.
Or my cousin, who is a last year Boomer, and younger who complained when he got a call while we were replacing the deck boards when I continued to work, using the driver. I simply told him his phone was known as a "mobile" in Britain and he should walk away from the deck to take his call.
So it goes both ways. Just don't be offended if you take calls or are constantly texting, and I just move on with my life. And remind you that your phone is mobile so if you don't like the noise, walk away.
The evils of technology are as old as the rattle of the telegraph key:
In an 1838 letter to Francis O.J. Smith in 1838, Morse wrote:
"This mode of instantaneous communication must inevitably become an instrument of immense power, to be wielded for good or for evil, as it shall be properly or improperly directed."
Is unseemly to complain about how retirees spend their time.
or...
How to pile on twitter without mentioning them.
Pretty sneaky WaPo.
I’m rarely on my phone or iPad when others are around, but every day I say aloud what a freakin’ miracle these things are. Compared to my first experience with computers (which had 16k for the CPU to work with and no visual input or output except for blinking lights on a later model), the fact that I can ask Siri from across the room to give me ball scores or the time…and she quickly answers…is simply amazing. Unfortunately, she will never tell me what she’s wearing.
4k photos and video can be exchanged with my daughter on the other side of the planet in txt msgs instantly. My wife can air drop a bundle of high res photos and video files to me in two seconds. This morning, still in bed, I air played Chappell’s appearance on SNL from my iPhone 13 mini to our massive and magnificent Samsung tv across the room. My wife and I Google the shit out of everything. It’s often a race to see who gets the answer first.
Millennials and Z’ers cannot possibly appreciate what a miracle these things are. They take them entirely for granted as part of the earth moon and sky. However, social media is a stage 4 metastatic cancer of the brain.
- Krumhorn
I'm the opposite - I'll often leave my phone untouched for days. It drives my daughter nuts that I don't have it on me at all times. I'm usually pretty good about taking it with me, when I'm out and about though. I held off getting a new phone until my present one was declared obsolete and disconnected as the older networks were shut off - twice. I hate the new phone. It's twice the size of the old one, and I feel like I'm having to haul around a piece of lumber in my pocket.
Now, when my wife and daughter see me using the new phone to check something, they want to gloat as if the old fossil is finally entering the modern age. Why wouldn't I use its features though? Just because I had no need to eagerly buy up new faddish phones when the old one worked, doesn't mean I won't use the new phone to its limits. It just means I could easily do without them. I don't get their mindset at all.
There are a couple of companies out there making Dumb Phones now. I would guess that they would be popular: The portability of cell phones, the ability to make and receive calls normally, some even have the capability to text. But: That's it, that's all, no more. NOT smart phones. I am sorely tempted - if I hadn't spent so darn much on this 2 x 6.
"Reading the news and reading things out loud that you think ought to be shared – that's what my grandfather used to do. "
Ann, that sounds like what you do. Your grandfather would have had a blog.
Is it possible that Millennials and Gen Xers are used to being the center of attention, and now that the retired old folks don't have to mind the children, they don't really want to?
Social media isn't a technical challenge, but can be addictive. No reason to think that people of all ages wouldn't be sucked in. Some of my retired friends are just as likely as young people to prioritize their phones in a manner dismissive of the actual humans present. I address it when it comes up.
"Are we boring you?"
"Don't show me the Youtube video, just tell me about it."
"I don't need to see the meme."
With parents, it is entirely possible that the young folks are over-staying their welcome. It is tricky, but it's possible to have a frank conversation with a parent. The young folks may have unrealistic expectations or the old folks may not be so interested in visiting.
If you can't engage your boomer parents' interest enough so that you're more interesting and significant than playing an internet game, look within. You likely want that discussion with your parents so you can tell them again how boomers wrecked the world. I'd rather check my stocks.
When I was a kid, I'll be 76 tomorrow, my dad came home from work got a beer and read the newspaper while mom finished preparing dinner. After dinner my sister and I washed the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen. Then we took a bath and watched a couple of tv shows. At 8 we were both in bed. What our parents did after that, I don't know.
In the mornings my mom always had the radio on. Before she started working full time when I was in the 5th grade the radio was on all day.
When I got older and spent breakfast, lunch or dinner in a coffee shop - think Denny's not Starbucks - there were always people reading news papers, myself included.
My mother-in-law and grandmother loved playing solitaire with a deck of cards. My mother and sister loved talking on the phone.
My point is, people have always been distracting themselves - or informing themselves - with newspapers, radios, telephones and tv's. A smartphone or tablet combines all those things into one device. Nothing has changed.
If your parents are boomers, there's a pretty good chance you're already middle aged or will be there real soon. You might want to rethink snarking about the "old folks".
Just sayin'.
a survey of 100 people, thats like the folgers coffee survey
“Ann, that sounds like what you do. Your grandfather would have had a blog.”
Yes, that’s something I’ve thought about many many times.
This is a perfect satirical mockery of the Boomer me me me generation.
Blogger bobby said...
If you can't engage your boomer parents' interest enough so that you're more interesting and significant than playing an internet game, look within. You likely want that discussion with your parents so you can tell them again how boomers wrecked the world. I'd rather check my stocks.
Millennials and Z’ers cannot possibly appreciate what a miracle these things are.
When I was 10 in 1963, I dreamed of having a miniature TV I could hide under the covers after bedtime — and now they exist! I don’t know that that’s a particularly good thing for a 10 year old to have, but I was pretty sure it was 59 years ago. The novelty of these devices is beyond the understanding of people who grew up with them.
Give us Boomers a break.
Millennials and Z’ers cannot possibly appreciate what a miracle these things are.
When I was 10 in 1963, I dreamed of having a miniature TV I could hide under the covers after bedtime — and now they exist! I don’t know that that’s a particularly good thing for a 10 year old to have, but I was pretty sure it was 59 years ago. The novelty of these devices is beyond the understanding of people who grew up with them.
Give us Boomers a break.
They probably hide behind their phones to keep from telling their useless lefty children how much a disappointment they are. I know avoiding interacting with a couple of my nieces and nephews is the only way to keep the peace in our family.
"I know avoiding interacting with a couple of my nieces and nephews is the only way to keep the peace in our family."
Vegan Democrats, then?
I have never owned a cell phone or a pager.
50 out of 100 Millennials say something about their parents and suddenly we have an indictment of the entire Boomer generation. The Post writes for the gullible.
If modern society didn't require me to have a smart phone, I wouldn't have one.
I use it for calls and texts. And rarely, at that.
I have no other use for it. Never will.
My wife, on the other hand, can't breathe without hers. Drives me nuts.
"Baby boomers can’t stop staring at their phones..."
There are about 70 million baby boomers. They're all alike? I'm doubtful...
The dailies now, where they even still exist, are anemic and filled with bland, generic writing about mostly national news.
Yes! Wire service stories and local press releases, only slightly rewritten.
"We thought you'd be interested in the new Crisis Center blah blah blah goody goody goody..."
Mrs. NorthOfTheOneOhOne has an Apple Watch, she takes phone calls on it and occasionally watches videos. I always kid her about having at Dick Tracy 2-way TV Wrist Radio.
I don't think the behavior described is attributable to any one generation over the other. I know Boomers who can't put their phones down. I know more Millennials and Zoomers who have that problem. I agree with the Kate, that article is really about slagging Boomers.
Ooooh! More than 100!
That's a very small number of people. 4 High School classrooms.
When my Dad first started texting, he wouldn't use spaces. I really missed it when that stopped, because part of the fun was trying to decode the jumble of letters.
The real old timers when asked for their cell phone number can’t remember it. They never call themselves they say. And then they add that they never carry it on them or turn it on. They see it as an emergency only car phone. Communications is not that common a skill.
I'm old enough to recall when you needed an adding machine for a small business, and some people had them at home. Oma took hers home when she finally closed the shop, and I recall taking it to skilled NCR-certified repairmen as late as the mid-70s.
The device needed special rolls of paper, was the size of a couple of bricks, and was heavy enough to weigh down a corpse.
OTOH Oma was an early and eager user of color TV. Actually I'm pretty sure it was her daughter, my aunt Louise, who made her buy it, including remote control.
We dropped our local newsrag sub about four years ago. It got smaller, crappier, and less relevant (as well as PC out the wazoo) and all I used it for was to see who died. I see it at the convenience store now--the Sunday is no larger than the Monday used to be.
Boomer.Grandparent.Flip Phone.I call. Get called.Some txting.
74% of statistics are made up on the spot.
Can't remember the last time I spoke with someone who did not own a cell phone. As the USSC noted in affording people more privacy protection in their cell phones, they are better thought of as pocket computers. So useful.
"I always kid her about having at Dick Tracy 2-way TV Wrist Radio."
That made me laugh.
Smooth ace in the comic books, but I bet even Dick didn't talk to his wrist 24/7.
I love my iPhone. I am amazed every day by what it can do. Computer, camera, WiFi. I can't imagine not having one. However, whenever I am going out with others, have company at home, are on a plane, shopping, at dinner, or anywhere out it public with other people around, I put in on vibrate just for emergencies. Common courtesy, etiquette and politeness are important.
Jacob had a dream where heaven was joined to earth and he named that node Bethel meaning “House of God.” For children of the world a screen serves the same purpose connecting the visible with the (formerly) invisible. This node has no name so I will do so now: Beth-Screen. It makes perfect sense that empty human beings would flock to Beth-Screen because it lets them see a distant world of magic. Heads bow at Beth-Screen. Silence is demanded in most of the Beth-Screen rituals. People find peace and joy while worshipping at Beth-Screen though it must be admitted, it is a fleeting joy with addiction side effects.
But what — or who — is on the other side of Beth-Screen? Who is God in this analogy? Is it the hive mind of humanity? Is it Dr. Evil himself, called “The Devil” in another time? Or is it just “Vanity of vanities”?
I’m still working out my analogy but I’m getting massive beeps so I know I’m over the target.
TO BE CONTINUED…
I'm old enough (60) to have used punch cards in a computer (albeit only for an exercise), spent $500 for a 30 mb hard drive, and used bbs's back in the day. So yeah, sometimes I just look at my computer and phone and doing Zoom calls and stuff and think "Yeah. . .this is The Future I looked forward to!"
I still use both all day, but I've also become addicted to using a typewriter to write letters.
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