Writes Barbara, in the comments to last night's TikTok post.
That prompted farmgirl:
Barbara- I just watched the Father/daughter.
That is what America should look like.
What a great Dad!!
I'd only written "She's scared to drop in." So I didn't let on what an immensely cool father/daughter interaction there was. It makes me want to be more obvious:
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I watched it and found it fairly unremarkable.
It's what I would expect from a daughter and loving father.
The kid was cute. Kids are cute.
Bonus points for the bunny ears on her helmet. Yea, daughters!
okay, that one WAS good.
dad, i want to try this.. By MYSELF!.. But, be there to catch me
and then shortly, dad says "oh, i Almost didn't need to catch you"
and then, she's doing all on her own (with dad watching over her).
I'm Pretty sure, THAT is how you build self confidence
Great moment.
That's they way I grow up, Dad, and Mom, patiently being there to pick me up, stop the bleeding, applying Mercurochrome, and sending me back into battle. (we just didn't have cameras in our pocket 24/7). Also the way we raised our kids. (and grand kids when we can)
Okay, that was good.
I guess I'm a big cynic , but I'm bothered that the whole interaction was captured with multiple cameras and broadcast to the world. Our kids ' brains become hardwired to expect all their memories to be filmed. I don't think that's a good thing. I hope those two have lots of meaningful moments without three cameras around.
That was wonderful...dad is a great coach. Watched the next one Chasing Sage. As one who helped teach my children and grandchildren to ski...I am proud to day they are expert skiers and love to hang out with their granddad (not me) on the slopes...nothing better.
Cute video. When my granddaughter was two, she was fearless. She was the queen of the playground and willing to take on any challenge no matter how fast or high. Of course, someone was always there to catch her. She’s 18 now and has learned that falling hurts. She’s more cautious now. Her fearless phase was fun but also terrifying. It’s great for a kid to develop self-confidence through achievement. It’s even greater for kids to learn judgment and risk assessment.
Agree with Wilbur that it seems normal to me, but I like normal. I don’t need drama for their to be much dust in my eye. I like the dad spinning when she drops in on her own. Good dad and brave daughter.
I'm with Birches. The multiple angles, the practiced way the dad speaks and even celebrates - the sweetness of the moment is obliterated.
Agree with Wilbur. It's what I would expect of any good father. It seemed normal. Like a father running alongside his child as they ride their bike without training wheels. Or a father pitching a fat one to his child, slow and easy, teaching him or her how to bat. Or a father....(fill in the blank).
If it's viewed as remarkable or notable, that says a ton about us today.
Drop in video is cute but I have to agree with Birches. And I see this sort of thing nearly every day I go to the local mountain bike park—dads and daughters and sons, moms and sons and daughters—in the moment, no one documenting. Always gives me hope for the future.
I assume/hope that the cameras exist to show grandma and grandpa that moment because they could not be there.
However, like Birches above, I am getting to the point where some of these family and personal videos on social media seem scripted and turn the kids into performers seeking attention and not kids just doin' stuff. And don't get me started on the pseudo-hip, clever, ironic content. Mark Twain it's not.
I appreciate Prof A's work on this part of the blog but except for rare instances, most of the results are just one more sign of the coming apocalypse than anything else.
Of course, opinions may vary and undoubtably do.
Beasts of England said...
"Bonus points for the bunny ears on her helmet. Yea, daughters!"
X2
I was cynical too. It’s such a perfect little story, maybe too perfect.
Hey -- I liked it, I called it sweetness overload, and I meant that as a compliment!
WFCs? I’ll never understand Tik Tok. It’s more of the “look at me, look at me, but don’t judge me you Bigot” generation.
I liked the interaction, but because I have a relative who is striving mightily to raise his little daughter to be mini-him with regard to ALL the SoCal X Games sports, and (my sour grapes) because I suck at all those things, my first reaction was an eye roll. My fault, not theirs.
I thought it was great and good fathering. Watched some of the other videos (snow boarding) which were really cute as the girl repeats good child-raiding mantras (something like "everybody falls"), etc.
I've seen too much FailArmy. I hope she tires of skateboarding quickly and moves on to something safer, like horses, boys, or scotch.
I’m sure they’re a normal duo- temper tantrums and power struggles mixed in w/a cool drop in :0)
Overall, I’m more pessimistic about our culture and degradation of familial norms. So much focus on other things- or, is it distractions? Patience seems a lost virtue.
It could be the little girl didn’t know she was being recorded. A couple of weeks ago, our youngest told me she was pregnant(told her dad separately, in a tractor in a hayfield he was mowing). Not the best timing, for her, but a Grandchild!!! She had a little sonogram. “It’s in the gummy bear stage.” She says. “Look at it’s spine!!” I did and it glowed in the shadows of the womb like a tight string of pearls.
I didn’t know she’d recorded my reaction!
I hate to say it, but the left will cry "White privilege". We already know that a child needs a dad like a bee needs a bicycle.
I took my son skiing for the first time at 18 months. The guy at the rental counter thought I was nuts.
I would take both kids skiing as much as possible, and then they started out-skiing me.
I went back to skiing with Mom!!
I've been ignoring--in a very principled manner--the TikTokeries but made an exception for this one, culled from the herd.
I wonder if the interactions would be different between pop and a son?
(Forgive doublepost--Blogger being difficult this a.m.)
Looked like normal to me, when a young girl is lucky enough to have a dad who cares.
My dad was one of those, maybe a bit "tougher" because of his stoic German ancestry. But he bought a Welsh pony for me, though we couldn't afford the tack. So I rode my pony with an old refashioned work horse bridle and no saddle or blanket. I would fall off. Dad would check me out, "Are you hurt?" "No," I would say. Then he would tell me to get back on that pony. Eventually I learned how to stay on. I prefer riding horses bareback to this day.
When I was that age I would have been out doing it on my own and getting banged up and one or the other parent would be shouting at me to be careful.
"Drop in video is cute but I have to agree with Birches. And I see this sort of thing nearly every day I go to the local mountain bike park—dads and daughters and sons, moms and sons and daughters—in the moment, no one documenting."
I share this concern and sometimes I think I should stop linking to anything that involves displaying your children to the world, but I do think this video is very helpful to someone trying to get inspired and informed about how to be a great father (or mother) and how to encourage a child to move away from fear and into competence (safely!).
“A couple of weeks ago, our youngest told me she was pregnant(told her dad separately, in a tractor in a hayfield he was mowing). Not the best timing, for her, but a Grandchild!!! She had a little sonogram. “It’s in the gummy bear stage.” She says. “Look at it’s spine!!” I did and it glowed in the shadows of the womb like a tight string of pearls.”
Congratulations Farmgirl!
My then-young daughter got thrown off a horse on her second day of riding lessons. Very scary; she got banged up but nothing permanent. When she recovered, she insisted on going back again and riding the horse. Which she did, successfully. Then she quit--no more horse riding for her! (Until she grew up--now she likes riding horses).
I was proud of her (and, yes, secretly pleased that I didn't have to pay for all the horsey stuff!)
Reminded me of my father teaching me to ride a bicycle when I was 5.
Sometimes trite is appropriate: The world would be a much better place if every dad was as loving and supportive, and every child learned to both express their fears and to overcome them.
I have to say I find the film critics to be Karen's. I am not a judgemental jealous petty little voyeur like Meade. I actually perform the teaching adult role with my living breathing Grandkids. Over the weekend it was coal forging steel into cutting tools, archery, wood carving, swimmin hole swimming etc. The last two days it's kayak fishing in a big pond. I wish I had the discipline to document these activities, but alas, I'm an in the moment action loving ADHD maniac. You have to earn it.
I agree the video is a good reminder, that I can be a better grandpa, always room to do better, and the video nudged me.
farmgirl, Congratulations on the grandchild. Timing can be a challenge, but the rewards are forever.
Congratulations, farmgirl! We have only one grandchild who is now 19. He loves the farm, even though we are not actively farming anymore. (We rent the crop land.)
May your grandchild grow to love the land (and animals) and learn from their lessons.
Iowan2: I’m so, so grateful for this. We have 2on the way- my son and his wife are 1/2way homefree.
All blessings.
I have no experience or insight regarding dads and daughters, except that my wife was for eight years the youngest child and only girl in her family, and had her father at her feet.
Except when it came to money, which they both knew he didn't have. She didn't bother to learn to drive until she was 20, since he (or her mom) could take her anywhere she needed to go.
She learned from her housewife mother that she existed to cook and clean for her father and older brothers, but I rescued her from that. (She and her mother were night and day in taste and opinion.)
In stark contrast to my own experience, when getting me to drive ASAP was a priority all around, and everybody depended on me.
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