July 22, 2017

At the Enjoyable Sandwich Café...

DSC00008

... you can talk all night.

And you can shop all night, too, preferably through The Althouse Amazon Portal.

That sandwich photograph originally appeared on this blog back here, in 2009. Sandwiches happened to come up twice on the blog today (if you count a cheeseburger as a sandwich), so that — in my entirely made-up rules of blogging — made it right to go into the archive for a sandwich photo for the café post.

42 comments:

David said...

That looks good whatever it is but I would not necessarily call it a sandwich. I know there are open faced sandwiches but a real sandwich is something you can pick up and eat with your hands without grabbing all the ingredients.

Feste said...

“... real sandwich is something you can pick up and eat with your hands ...”

It’s a Red Plenty sandwich. That one sandwich shows why linear sandwich-programming for a whole society fails, why we can’t define optimality in sandwich markets, why optimal sandwich societies end up defining optimal sandwiches by resort to horoscopes, why bold sandwich makers know to cook-as-test, accepting success and failure - maybe even assembling yummies for their own tastes, seeing who else wants to try.

Comanche Voter said...

Feste your comment makes me wonder if you have read the book Red Plenty by Francis Spufford. It's one of the books around that is well worth reading. Part history, part novel--and concerned with linear programming for a nation's output. Now from my experience in the petroleum refining industry, I can tell you that linear programming is a very useful tool for maximizing output. Applied to a nation state emerging from preindustrial serfdom--not so much. It is telling that Kruschev and other Russian leaders held a sincere belief in 1960 that Russian industrial output would surpass that of the United States by 1980.

As for the sandwich; when my Australian friends visit me here in Southern California they only want open face sandwiches--that slice of bread on top is not only superfluous, it's strenuously rejected.

Now looking at the picture our host presented, I couldn't identify some of the ingredients. I'm afraid David Brooks would have to take me to a Mexican restaurant--which I'd prefer anyway. Every Southern Californian has his or her favorite Mexican restaurant--what the Brits would call a "local"--which the California will swear makes the best Mexican food in the world. I can highly recommend La Cabanita in Montrose CA.

Michael K said...

Guadalajara Grill in Tucson is pretty good. A ;lady come to the table to make your salsa.

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

Hey I meant to add this to one of the succulent cafes:

Giant, gorgeous potted succulent spotted in Coronado, CA. Stroller wheel for scale.

It's just a cellphone snap, not a high quality Althouse pic, but I still thought it was cool.

Feste said...

Comanche Voter said...

Very nice. And thank you. There’s a place down there – Felipe’s? - with sawdust on the floor.

And that other place - a cult favorite of mine - Clifton’s Cafeteria, where you pay (used to pay) what you feel the meal is worth, which is the why of the wherefore that Red Plenty, to me, is more about the questions -- the questions - that Spufford does not answer.

Sorry, but my vocational habits are acting up - asking more questions than can be answered, usually in a closed room, sometimes with groups.

Red Plenty feeds me there. I’ll need to give it another read.

What I do remember (thanks again for the pushback) is asking questions: whether linearity with returns to scale is properly questioned in the book (did he miss some parameters?) – whether linearity alone is really an all-purpose model, especially when market dynamics kick in and problems become intractable, and then, something about what Sen noted in saying that coherency criteria are themselves incoherent with a stated purpose.

Our problem – socially – is that even if all agents agree in on ONE linear model as optimal, still not all agents agree on the purpose.

Thus the - “real sandwich is something you can pick up and eat with your hands” - problem is preference and value distributed, in a non-linear market of subjectives.

I’d need to check my notes on other problems I noted.

It all works more like a gas in a room asking questions, getting random answers from subjective respondents, like Kaiser Sose reading shit off the wall to the smart-detective in “Usual Suspects.”

Petro refining facilities don’t work like human societies. Or like humans in society. Because you’re talking about controlled flow - or you hope. I know a thing or two about process control, flow, having investigated, in the Bay Area, on the Chevron campus north-east of the city, Richmond, just why certain industrial accidents occurred.

And why a steam boiler from a process plant blew and ended up in a schoolyard 4 blocks away.

Your main problems are whether you’re using the correct maths, whether your instruments are properly calibrated, and whether your chief engineers are sober and observant - “fully engaged,” to borrow a military term for pilots.

For starters.

Humans are not subject to closed controls - not easily, anyway.

Thanks again for the push back. Will give the book another read.

Big Mike said...

@Althouse, was that the sandwich where I asked you who had eaten it before you?

Ugly thing. I can see why it has a stake through its heart.

Feste said...

screwed that one up ...

Correction:

" .. Sen noted in saying that coherency criteria are themselves incoherent WITHOUT a stated purpose ..."

Feste said...

NB

Comanche Voter said...” Feste your comment makes me wonder if you have read the book Red Plenty by Francis Spufford. It's one of the books around that is well worth reading. Part history, part novel--and concerned with linear programming for a nation's output ....”

See my responses above. Quick note: Yes, Red Plenty is "part novel."

Scientism, better. My read. It takes itself as scientism . The “linear programming for a nation's output”, still reads to me like industrial process flow control problems run –scientistically – amuck.

Imperfect humans are, after all, still in control.

That’s my bias. Working more with imperfect humans than with perfect flow-control machines.

Still love Clifton’s. For those – very human - reasons.

Cheers.

David Baker said...

I just realized that Minneapolis isn't the first police jurisdiction to posit the "Loud Noise" theory; a loud noise or a series of loud noises likely to cause police officers to quick-draw their guns and shoot, ideally, in the direction of the noise, day or night.

No, the loud-noise theory was first test-marketed in 2012 by the city of Cleveland following a scene right out of "The Blues Brothers." By the time is was over, 106 officers and 64 police cars had participated in a wild, nighttime chase through the streets of Cleveland for a period of no less than 20 minutes.

But there was problem; there was no probable cause for the chase. No wants, no warrants, they weren't even face-to-face with the "suspect." So they came up with the "Loud Noise" theory, that their two officers were just sitting in their patrol car eating donuts when they were startled by a loud noise of unknown origin, then saw a car "speeding away" in the distance. So with guns drawn and at the ready, they gave chase - and breathlessly called for assistance, as much as they could get. That's when 40% of the Cleveland police force on duty that night joined in - some reaching speeds of 100mph so as not to miss out on the action.

But jeezus-H-christ, how do you justify 106 officers and 64 police cars chasing an unknown suspect and his girlfriend for no apparent reason? A loud noise.

BTW, the unarmed and unwanted suspect and his girlfriend were gunned down when the chase ended in a school yard. It was never determined why they just didn't pull over, since they had done nothing wrong.

Also, a kitten was run over and killed by a police car on Maple Avenue near 16th Street. Other than that, and two dead citizens, plus a few dents and flat tires - a pretty good night, considering. And as far as I can tell, the "LOUD NOISE" theory went over pretty well.

But back in Minneapolis, the chief wasn't buying it. So the notoriously ditsy mayor fired her.

Etienne said...

MSNBC pundit Donny Deutsch criticized incoming White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci as "a tire salesman". ...Scaramucci has "no qualifications" to be the next communications director for Trump."

ouch...

I think "tire salesmen" should be offended maybe.

I mean, who the hell names their kid "Donny"? I heard he named his kid "Daisy."

Daisy and Donny went to the Zoo
Where Daisy and Donny sniffed a lot of glue

Their marmalade skies upset the Monkeys
As rocking horse people swung in their trees

Daisy ventured to the cage of her kaleidoscope demise
Where the vultures vomited on her marshmallow pies

Donny did pirouettes clicking his heals
As the Lions squealed, and the Tigers killed

Chomp Chomp the Zoo is now closed

Etienne said...

That sandwich reminds me of Owls regurgitating rats to their young.

Feste said...

"That sandwich reminds me of Owls regurgitating rats to their young."

Hahaha!

Comanche Voter, see! Subjectives!

Etienne, I’ve about had it with you. Telling me that Coyote ate the Roadrunner.

exiledonmainstreet said...

Etienne said...
MSNBC pundit Donny Deutsch criticized incoming White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci as "a tire salesman"."

I do not take a grown man who calls himself "Donny" seriously.

Etienne said...

You know when you work for your meal, I mean really work for it, it tastes so much better!

buwaya said...

Tire sales are a far more respectable line of work than politics, or TV punditing.
He should respect his betters.

Feste said...

Haha.

“Been chasing this damn bird for 20 years, I’m not really trained for anything else. Guess I kinda let my life get away from me ... fucking identity issues right now!”

Thank you. Earthquake Pills has been my source of narcissism reduction (obviously not working very damn good), Wiley E. Coyote - Genius. That’s why I can’t let the bird die. I need the bird. Gimme the bird.

Are those Family Guy voices?

Ralph L said...

The bread on the bottom is pointless.
Except for the knife.

Laslo Spatula said...

I'm really enjoying Feste's comments.

I am Laslo.

Unknown said...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chip_butty

Michael Fitzgerald said...

Big Mike said...
@Althouse, was that the sandwich where I asked you who had eaten it before you?

Ugly thing. I can see why it has a stake through its heart.

7/22/17, 10:30 PM

LMAO- Looks like the waiter dropped the plate on the way to the table....

Laslo Spatula said...

Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar, says....

Yeah, I'm that brother you see in the internet porn, fucking the little white women with the pigtails and shit. I didn't plan to be in porn -- my dream was to be a Rapper -- but my rhymes they never blew up, and now here I am, giving lil' young white bitches the Big Black Monster Cock...

I sure as hell don't get white people. Some of them, they can't get enough of me ass-fucking the tiny blonde girls: shit, some of these girls is still wearing, like, braces on their teeth. I see them before the shoot and think There's No Way In Hell My Black Cock Is Gonna Fit In HER Tiny White Ass, but sure enough it does: these lil' white chicks is PROFESSIONAL....

But then, I'M a Professional, and my Profession is ass-fucking lil' white girls. I talk with the bitches beforehand, make sure they is gonna be OK with what is gonna go down. Like, some of them tell me, "Tyrone, only give me half-strokes", and like I said, I'm Professional, I only put the Big Black Monster Cock in halfway...

Some of them though, they can take it ALL: shit, I swear sometimes I can feel my dick rubbing up against their spine, you know? Fuck, I don't even know how they can even walk when I'm done with them, but like I said: they is Professional...

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar, says....

Shit, I don't get it. A Brother Pimps out some hos for money, and now he's a criminal. Meanwhile, a sweaty-ass white agent gets paid for hooking up white chicks to get fucked on camera, and he's a Businessman: someone explain to me what the difference is in THAT....

Don't get me wrong: the Business has been good to me. Shit, I just got paid Big Dollar to have my own line of Tyrone Bonebad Black Monster Cocks -- like Michael Jordan with his sneakers, but it's me, Tyrone, with my Cock. I even think I'm gonna put my own line of T-Shirts out there, but instead of "Be Like Mike" they gonna say "Bone Like Tyrone"....

It freaks me out a little, though: I know there are some sweaty-ass white guys buying my Tyrone Bonebad Black Monster Cock to stick up their own pasty asses, but I can't do shit about that, and I'm still getting paid, you know what I mean...?

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar, says....

When you're a Porn Star you get asked to do some freaky shit -- and I'll piss on a tiny white chick if the money is right -- buy there is one thing I sure as fuck ain't gonna do: Double Anal...

For those of you who ain't see it, here's what Double Anal is: two dudes put their cocks in the same white chick, in the same ass, at the same time. Don't get me wrong: I ain't got no problem with fucking some tiny white chick in the ass while she's sucking another brother's cock -- but two cocks in the same ass, all rubbing against each other? Sorry, but that's getting too gay for me, you feel me...?

Speaking of Gay: I've been offered BIG bank to fuck white dudes in the ass. Like, I appreciate the offer, and I ain't got no hate for the Gays, but Tyrone only fucks CHICKS in the asshole, you know what I'm saying...?

And, No, Tyrone ain't fucking no Trannies, either: sorry, all you Caitlyns...

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Feste said...

“Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar”

See, that’s what we’re talking about.

No wonder Stephen Hawking warned the world, “get the fuck rid of Laslo in charge at CERN, ‘Subliminals, & Stargates: Laslo’s Illuminati’s Plan for Satan’s Arrival’, warned Hawking in, “The Laslo Effect, Big Black Hole will Swallow You!"

Laslo would not step aside, nor close CERN down, “I ain't giving up the Dream.”

6500 gigaelectronvolts vibrator, and “braces on their teeth,” it’ll blow ‘em right off!

27km long Black Monster Cock-Ring

13.7 billion years Banging Experience, at the “BIG bank" (he meant BANG, spelling error?).

White guys in charge. Gov’t clearance.

What could go wrong?

Laslo Spatula said...

Like I said, my Dream is to be a Rapper. Some rappers write about when they was back slinging dope; me, I rhyme about fucking white chicks in the ass, because I'm keeping it Real, you know? Here's a sample of a Rhyme I wrote back in The Day: it's called "Big Black Monster Cock"...

I fuck white chicks in the ass
And get paid Top Dollar
Fuck'em in the ass
Til the White Girl holler
Cry, lil' White Girl
While Bone-T has a laugh
Fucking you from behind
Til I break your ass in half
Some sling H, some sling rocks
Bone-T, he slings
Big Black Monster Cock
You think yo dick is bigger than mine?
Fuck you, boy, don't make me smile
You measure you in inches
I measure me in miles

Big Black Monster Cock (uh-Huh Uh-Huh)
Big Black Monster Cock (uh-Huh Uh-Huh)
I put my cock in white asses
while you put your dick in pink socks
Big Black Monster Cock (uh-Huh Uh-Huh)

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar, says....

Like I said, my Dream is to be a Rapper. And -- as a Rapper -- I want to present a Positive Vibe to the Community, understand? So here's another sample of a Rhyme I wrote back in The Day: it's called "Gay Dude Wants My Cock (I Ain't Mad At You)"...

So you like dudes
sucking yo dick
Bone-T he ain't
got no problem with it
It ain't my Style
It ain't my Scene
Suck cock all you want
It just ain't my thing
(you feel me?)
I got no need
to beat a dude down
jes because he gay
Just don't ask me to dance
Cuz I don't dance that way

Gay Dude Wants My Cock
But I Ain't Mad At You
Jes find another brother
to fuck you in the ass
and Everything Be Cool
(you feel me?)
Gay Dude Wants My Cock
Gay Dude Wants My Cock
Gay Dude Wants My Cock
Gay Dude Wants My Cock

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Ralph L said...

Sorry, but that's getting too gay for me, you feel me...?
Yes.
No wait, that's Harvey's black dildo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Tyrone Bonebad, Interracial Pornstar, says....

Sure, I'm a Black Man with a huge Black Monster Cock, but I don't like to play no negative stereotypes in my movies: I want to set a positive image for the Community when I'm fucking lil' white girls in the ass, you understand...?

So I don't play no thugs or rapists or any of that ghetto shit: fuck that. Here's some of the roles I HAVE played:

I'm a Black Man with a huge Black Monster Cock, but I'm also a Police Officer. I pull a lil' white girl over for a traffic violation, and then -- to get out of the ticket -- she lets me fuck her in the ass...

I'm a Black Man with a huge Black Monster Cock, but I'm also a Professional Football Star. This lil' white girl is a Cheerleader, and -- to help the team -- she lets me fuck her in the ass...

I'm a Black Man with a huge Black Monster Cock, but I'm also an Important Rap Producer. This lil' white girl wants to be a rapper, and -- to get me to make her record -- she lets me fuck her in the ass...

You see what I'm doing? I'm showing that a Black Man doesn't have to be a Thug to be a Man: he can be a Police Officer, a Football Star, or a Big Time Record Producer. I'm a Role Model, bitches: I take this shit SERIOUSLY, you feel me....?

Don't get me wrong: I still work hard on my Rhymes: I ain't giving up the Dream. But until then I fuck lil' white girls in the ass to make my bank until I get the Big Time Hook-Up...

I am Laslo.

Steven said...

Look, "sandwich" is a technology invented so that the Earl of Sandwich could eat while playing cards and/or doing accounts at his desk without making a mess. If you cannot pick it up and take a bite while engaged in those activities without making a mess, it cannot be a sandwich. It's that freakin' simple.

The pictured item is not a sandwich, it's a pile. That bread is at the bottom of the pile does not matter, because it does not make use of any techne to make it possible to eat by hand without making a mess.

After something has managed to meet the basic hurdle of "it can be eaten by hand without fouling the hand", then there's room for debate on whether it's similar enough to the prototype sandwich (corned beef between pieces of toasted bread) to be one. But if you can't, it is absolutely not a sandwich, any more than a device incapable of long-distance audio communication can be a telephone.

David Baker said...

Here’s an excellent nighttime photo of the alleyway where Justine Ruszczyk was shot and killed by Minneapolis police officer Mohamad Noor.

See also this money-quote: "Officer Noor had been the first Somali [Muslim] cop in the immigrant-rich Fifth Precinct, his hiring hailed by the [naive, ditsy] mayor and Minneapolis’s Somali [Sharia hungry] community.

rhhardin said...

A hot dog isn't a sandwich because you don't eat it starting in the middle.

rhhardin said...

An open faced sandwich isn't a sandwich. Lots of words work like that. Health care, for instance.

Speaking of health care, the best open faced sandwich is white bread, butter, mashed potatoes and brown gravy. It's what you get for seconds if you're still hungry and have already had your serving of roast beef in the school cafeteria.

clint said...

What an awesome way to start the day. Half a dozen new Laslo stories to go with my morning coffee.

I agree with Stephen about the word "sandwich".

Calling it an open-faced sandwich is fine, but the qualifier shouldn't be omitted or elided. It's like the difference between an elephant and an elephant seal. Or zombies and red-neck pain-worshipping torture zombies. Totally different genus.

Fabi said...

I second clint's initial observation. I'm sitting at the Waffle House reading Laslo and trying my best not to cry from laughing so hard. My waitress asked me what was so entertaining. The pop-up devil wanted me to say something about Tyrone Bonebad. The pop-up angel made me say -- "A legal blog." She game me a puzzled look.

Ann Althouse said...

"@Althouse, was that the sandwich where I asked you who had eaten it before you?"

Go to the link and read the thread. I answered you there: "Who ate it? Read the thread! Edjamikated Redneck!"

It wasn't my sandwich at all.

Hagar said...

The Danish open-decker sandwich of your choice with a tall glass of Carlsberg in Dyrehaven on a sunny day in June is like a little bit of Heaven.

AllenS said...

Looks like a sandwich that you would buy from IKEA.

David Baker said...

BTW, you'll notice in the link I posted above that the alleyway where Justine Ruszczyk was gunned down is not poorly lit at all, and certainly not foreboding. Especially if you enter as armed and dangerous as Officer Noor was. And I wonder what his partner thought when Noor drew his weapon and placed on his lap, his finger apparently on the trigger.

I also wonder how Officer Noor would react to the sandwich pictured above - if he would shoot the female server who dared to place that pile of secondhand pork in front of him. Frankly, I think he would, especially since he's (still) armed and dangerous.

Paco Wové said...

I had forgotten that Althouse ever did meet-ups. Would a modern-day Althouse meet-up inevitably descend into fisticuffs?

Big Mike said...

@Althouse, I was right! Admit it -- thd sandwich does look like something that slithered down the esophagus and came violently back up.

I miss Edjamikated Redneck and Hoosier Daddy and many other commenters from those days.

Ralph L said...

Would a modern-day Althouse meet-up inevitably descend into fisticuffs?
Not if Laslo is there.