March 5, 2015

"Nor did the researchers find any convincing correlation between a man’s foot size..."

"... and the length of his manhood."

(What about nose size? If they found a convincing correlation, people wouldn't get so many nose jobs... or maybe there would be nose enlargements, like breast enlargements.)

43 comments:

SGT Ted said...

Women everywhere disappointed. Film at 11:00.

traditionalguy said...

Big Foot was unavailable for comment. He is reportedly still roaming around looking for drunken college co-eds that are not too petite.

Ann Althouse said...

Overheard at Meadhouse: "Overheard at Meadhouse: 'Oh don't put that up.'"

Nonapod said...

The science is settled.

rhhardin said...

According to women's health, the vagina is about the length of a tube of lip gloss, so that sounds like about all you'd need penis-wise.

Laslo Spatula said...

So then how exactly are we to determine the length of Hillary's penis?


I am Laslo.

Bob Boyd said...

"So then how exactly are we to determine the length of Hillary's penis?"

It depends (I hate to use that word) on the application. She can swap it out like a camera lense without unbuckling all those straps.
She calls it her "private server".

Wince said...

Doctors may also use the graph to help men find well-fitting condoms, said the team.

US is way behind approving better fitting, variable size condoms because of FDA.

FDA will not allow the sale of fitted condoms because, inter alia, after over a decade, they still haven't set up a means to test variable size condoms that are otherwise available across the globe.

Can you imagine the outcry if women's birth control methods were similarly restricted in such an arbitrary manner?

And "girth" -- not length -- is the primary issue when it comes to better fitting condoms.

jr565 said...

This of course only applies to real men with penises and not transgenederd women with fake penises.
And wait, isn't this study discrimatory because it's male penis centric? Those men without penises and or who have artificial penises may feel slighted. And we can't have that.
So goign forward, in the interest of not causing men without penises any sadness, we should do away with studies about penis size.

jr565 said...

Hobbits probsbly have big penises considering their shoe size.

tim in vermont said...

I bet there is research to show there is not a convincing correlation between "manhood size" and getting laid by he girlfriends of previous lovers too...

jr565 said...

Actually, Hobbits may not have big feet. Tolkien mentions they have hairy feet, but not necessarily big feet. The big feet may have been added by fantasy artist like the Hidebrand brothers and that's why people think Hobibts have big feet.
And also, they generally don't wear shoes, so I erred by describing them as have a large shoe size. If they decide to start wearing shoess.THEN they'd have a large shoe size.

madAsHell said...

I was always more concerned with finding all her buttons.

BarrySanders20 said...

Always a good one to use in mixed company when someone brings up foot size:

"You know what they say. The bigger the feet . . .

(wait for it)

The bigger the shoes."

Now I have science on my side.

David said...

Accept no substitutes!

FullMoon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
David said...

Bigfoot is disappointed.

Amexpat said...

Another good reason for the US to switch to the metric system: 15 centimeters sounds more impressive than 6 inches.

Rob said...

I for one object to the absurd notion that a man's penis length is a measure of his "manhood." I understand it's just a euphemism, but a similar euphemism equating a woman's womanhood or femininity to the size of her vagina or breasts would be considered outrageously demeaning and vulgar. Double standards abound.

Bill said...

AA: "... maybe there would be nose enlargements ..."
Wouldn't that be false advertising? Unless you think there's some sort of sympathetic magic going on, so changing one part changes the other....

tim in vermont said...

What about nose size?

Millions of Match.com users want to know!

I'm Full of Soup said...

I think they did find a correlation between above-average size and daily blog commenting.

Laslo Spatula said...

"I think they did find a correlation between above-average size and daily blog commenting."

I remember answering that survey. Hope I didn't skew the curve.

I am Laslo.

richard mcenroe said...

These days the correlation seems to be between his manhood and his credit rating...

William said...

It was as much a curse as a blessing. I have unusually big feet, and all my life I have been beset by women with their weird big foot fetishes. Some of it is harmless and even fun. I never objected to women buying me argyle socks and Gucci loafers. I even entertained their request put them on and pull them off over and over again as they watched obsessively with labored breathing. Our libidos are as individualized as our fingerprints, and we should be tolerant of our differences. In certain moods I was even willing to let favored women sand down my calluses. I always drew the line at letting women lick the jam from the crevices of my toes. You have to draw the line somewhere......,As noted, a lot of this was harmless
fun, but there are larger issues at stake. A man is more than the sum total of his shoe size. A man has virtues and vices that have nothing to do with the size of his feet. We are emotionally investing too much in this relatively extraneous physical feature.

Smilin' Jack said...

(What about nose size? If they found a convincing correlation, people wouldn't get so many nose jobs... or maybe there would be nose enlargements, like breast enlargements.)

No, it's a negative correlation. Big nose, little hose.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Having clicked on the link, and having received proof positive that I'm doing just fine in the trouser snake department, now I'm off to go view some internet pr*n so I can reestablish the high level of neurotic insecurity about my penile adequacy to which I have become so very well-accustomed.

Lnelson said...

Ann wrote:
What about nose size? If they found a convincing correlation, people wouldn't get so many nose jobs... or maybe there would be nose enlargements, like breast enlargements.

"Oh Pinnochio, tell me another lie."

Jeff said...

Or you could just do what I do and use your big nose.

Skeptical Voter said...

With a size 14 EE foot, I resent the implications of the study.

Brando said...

Unless it falls outside of average range, women don't seem to care about size (that, or they're just humor ing us!). More important is what you can do with what you have.

Which makes sense, because most of us guys feel the same about boobs.

Virgil Hilts said...

Hmmm -- What is the difference between a "convincing correlation" and an "unconvincing correlation"? Isn't a correlation a correlation. Whether a correlation suggests causation is of course another question, but what the heck is an unconvincing correlation?

ken in tx said...

The word penis is a euphemism itself. It is latin for tail. The Romans called it a gladius. Which sounds sort of happy, but it is a metaphor if not a euphemism as well. It means sword.

Wilbur said...


As a member of the upper 2%, I can tell you it is neither boon nor bane.

Women? A third love it, a third don't, and a third claim indifference.

It's not like having a great figure as a woman, which she can reveal to whatever extent she chooses.

It's never played a role in getting a woman into bed.

You just wouldn't go around bringing it up to people of either gender. It would make me uncomfortable to do so. If I was gay it would be a much bigger deal (no pun).

I enjoy being greatly endowed. But it's not something I'm proud of, in the sense that I didn't create it or earn it.

I've never written about this in my life.

Unknown said...

Great post Wilbur, I especially enjoyed the double entendre in the 1st sentence.

As a member of the average, I've never had any complaints. The average pinball can hit all of the pins and light the machine up if it's played well.

CStanley said...

What about nose size? If they found a convincing correlation, people wouldn't get so many nose jobs... or maybe there would be nose enlargements, like breast enlargements.

And men will be overheard saying, "Hey, my eyes are up here!"

Lewis Wetzel said...

This study did not mention that the best way to mitigate anxiety about your penis size is to put really, really big tires on your pick up truck. Many men in Wisconsin use this technique.
It's science. You can't argue with science.

bobby said...

Strange. The proper unit of measurement of the length of my manhood is "Years", so I guess I'm just not seeing where you're going with this.

"I may have a small dick, but I have a hell of a fast car! Got a fancy car, too, and . . . So I guess everthing be ok."

Well, no, not everything be. You have a small dick.

Jeff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jeff said...

When she points at my little friend and laughs, saying "Just who do you think you're going to satisfy with that little thing?" I just smile and say "Me."

Todd Roberson said...

If ever there was a post of low-hanging fruit for Laslo this is it. And ... As usual ... He came through again.

Spatula/Walker 2016!

Francisco D said...

I have perfected the art of slyly checking out a woman's derriere without appearing lascivious.

Until now, I never understood why women were slyly checking out my shoe size.

tim in vermont said...

I remember one time in London Heathrow sitting and waiting for a flight at a table in a cafe and hearing one girl (won't call her a woman) telling her girlfriend that she would never date a man with tiny hands or feet again.

The biggest dick I ever saw in person (straight men don't see a lot of dicks) was a guy with delicate hands, he was a fiddle player, BTW, who barged into the bathroom at a party while I was peeing and whipped out a fire hose to join me in micturation.