Althouse: Wigging out.

January 30, 2007

Wigging out.

From bad chompers to bad hair. Watch out for the NSFW expletives.

I saw that the other day, half forgot it, then played it again today and laughed even more. I see some commenters over at YouTube think it's fake -- I disagree -- and others feel very sorry for the young woman -- and I disagree with that too. The line "you'll look back on this and laugh" is spoken in the clip, and it was never more true. But if it's not -- if the bride never looks back and laughs -- I feel very sorry for the groom.

UPDATE: Hoax! (Via Metafilter.)

30 comments:

Jennifer said...: I feel sorry for the groom anyway. Freak out about your bad hair day at your wedding...ok. Go psycho with scissors while screeching like a banshee...well outside of the range of sanity.; 1/30/07, 8:23 AM
Nasty, Brutish & Short said...: Always, ALWAYS do a dry run with the hairstylist a few days before the wedding.; 1/30/07, 8:37 AM
MadisonMan said...: NB&S has it right on. Why, on a big day, do you test-run a new hairstyle? Because you think it'll turn out all right? Riiight.

This woman probably thinks everyone always puts down the toilet seat for her as well -- rather than checking before she sits down. The World does not revolve around you honey, even on Your Big Day.; 1/30/07, 8:47 AM
Meade said...: You may now [ditch] the bride.

If I may, a note to young men in general who are eager to marry or enter any serious relationship of which the potential dissolution would require lawyers, courts, time, money, and agony. (LOTS of agony):

Watch this video clip. Now watch it again and ask yourself three questions:

>What are my needs and how will this relationship meet them?
>What exactly are the freedoms I will be giving up?
>How is that a fair?

Now watch that clip one more time, this time with your potential partner, who's reaction you quietly thoughtfully observe, and ask yourself one more question:

>What's my hurry?"

Remember: Measure twice; cut once.; 1/30/07, 9:02 AM
reader_iam said...: Assuming this is real, what I want to know is: Did this woman do a better job of picking a husband than she did her bridesmaid/friends?

(Definitely she needs to laugh, and it would have been better if she didn't wait 'til later. Due to the poufy nature of crinoline under my dress, I got stuck in a bathroom and couldn't get out during my wedding reception. I had to yell for help. By the time I was set free, I was laughing so hard I had to, you'll pardon my french, take another piss. But that time I had someone help me with the dress.

Soooooo undignified. Therefore, funny.); 1/30/07, 9:05 AM
bearbee said...: Dorothy Parker asked Hemingway: "Exactly what do you mean by 'guts'?" Hemingway replied: "I mean, grace under pressure."

Pity, pity, pity the poor husband should he ever leave his shorts lying on the floor next to the hamper.

I hope someone gave her a copy of Ellen Fein's book 'The Rules for Marriage.'; 1/30/07, 9:05 AM
Anonymous said...: HAW!!! thank you for posting this. I busted a gut.

Of couse, she does look terrible. I was wondering when it was going to get funny, then as soon as she appeared I knew where this was going.

I love that one the bridesmaids tried to use "it suits you" as a consolation. I've never been very good at providing faux consolation in unfortunate mishaps like this, always preferring to deal with the situation as it really is.

I'm still laughing. Thank you for posting this on a Tuesday. I'm going to have a good day now.; 1/30/07, 9:12 AM
MadisonMan said...: reader_iam: How did you get in the bathroom in the first place if the crinoline wouldn't let you get out?; 1/30/07, 9:31 AM
reader_iam said...: Um, the dress got hung up on something INSIDE the bathroom? (No, not that--ewwww).; 1/30/07, 9:33 AM
reader_iam said...: Sorry for the "um," Madisonman. I'm not making fun of you. Just still chuckling at the memory.

Wonder what that bride would have done if her future sisters-in-law inexplicably hired a male stripper to crash the rehearsal dinner, as mine did (my MOTHER was the one who wigged out at the one, and mother-in-law ended up sobbing in another room). Holy crap. Talk about needing a sense of humor. I didn't laugh right then about that (especially since the stripper was dressed as a cop, and at the time I was ducking a potential subpoena having to do with a town meeting I had covered as a reporter), though my best girlfriend (still) laughed hysterically throughout.

But I sure I have laughed a gazillion times since then. Everyone has. (Except my mother. Oh, no no no no. Twelve years later and It Is Still Not To Be Mentioned.)

The pictures are priceless, by the way. But the guy was a pig.; 1/30/07, 9:41 AM
vbspurs said...: I stopped at 1:31 to go, yeesh, can't take anymore hysterics.

FWIW, I have mixed feelings about this incident being fake -- at first, I thought the bride was acting, but her friends were not. Then, she went psycho in a way I've personally seen bridezillas do, before, so...perhaps it wasn't rigged for the camera.

This, however, is totally fake.

NOTE: NOT work-place friendly. And it's gross, too, yet when I first saw it, I laughed.

Cheers,
Victoria; 1/30/07, 9:55 AM
MadisonMan said...: the dress got hung up on something INSIDE the bathroom

Aah. I was just picturing someone go in the bathroom through the door. How, then, could they not exit they same door? Didn't think about getting caught on something.

I don't remember much from my own wedding, other than exhaustion and aching feet. No one tells you how long you'll be standing.; 1/30/07, 10:11 AM
Laura Reynolds said...: I guess it will take motherhood to get this woman over the hump. I am told that's real important.; 1/30/07, 10:29 AM
Wade Garrett said...: I can't believe the sense of entitlement! I don't meant to be too much of a hater, because I've enjoyed many of the weddings I've attended in the past, but I've also known friends of friends for whom the wedding is apparently little more than an excuse to allow the bride-to-be free reign to act like a seven year-old for six months prior to the wedding.

Unrelated, but it makes the "sanctity of marriage" folks seem hopeless old-fashioned when they overlook what weddings have become in this country.; 1/30/07, 11:09 AM
stoqboy said...: For the groom's sake, I hope we watched an example of temporary insanity.; 1/30/07, 11:22 AM
Julie said...: Oh my gosh, I NEED RESOLUTION!

I totally thought it was fake at first, but then by the end I realized if it was fake then this was an Oscar winning performance by the bride. Now I have to know....what did she end up looking like?!; 1/30/07, 11:24 AM
Meade said...: SteveR said...
I guess it will take motherhood to get this woman over the hump. I am told that's real important.

SOL (Sniggering Out Loud)! ...before sobering up at the thought of bringing an innocent new life into that particular woman's world of conceit.

One more flag in the form of a cautionary question for grooms-to-be:

> Since some personality disorders tend to be nearly untreatable to completely incurable, are you prepared to be the primary parent if motherhood fails in getting your connubial narcissist over the... hump? (What hump?)

Come to think of it... measure three times; cut once.

And then measure three times more.; 1/30/07, 11:39 AM
Anonymous said...: I couldn't believe she went at it with the scissors. Oh geez. Back in the 70s I photographed a ton of weddings and I've got a few stories but nothing quite like this. The situation was salvageable until she started in with the scissors. Holy, holy cow.; 1/30/07, 12:18 PM
vbspurs said...: SOL (Sniggering Out Loud)! ...

Cute. Topical. But watch out.

You might get confused looks with the Althouse-definition and with its more common definition:

Sh*t out of Luck.

That's clearly what the bridgegroom is.

Cheers,
Victoria; 1/30/07, 12:43 PM
Laura Reynolds said...: Meade: That's hardly fair (but very funny). We play on an even playing field of wit and you trot out Young Frankenstein.; 1/30/07, 12:54 PM
Anonymous said...: NSFW?
Narcissistic Screaming Frantic Woman?

I had a bridal come-apart the night of the rehearsal dinner...it had something to do with my matron of honor and pleats in her skirt. Oh, man, what a witch I was! I can somewhat relate.

Being married to a good man for 16 years worked out the kinks. Things are less important to me now and more important to him, so we kinda' met in the middle.

God bless this couple.; 1/30/07, 12:57 PM
Anonymous said...: Unrelated, but it makes the "sanctity of marriage" folks seem hopeless old-fashioned when they overlook what weddings have become in this country.

Ahem. Marriage starts when this stuff is over.

I'm sure this princess has acted like a total loon every day of her life in any case. She wasn't exposed to mystical marriage license cooties and "catch" being a self-absorbed hysterical drama queen.

Gravity and sunlight are old-fashioned too.; 1/30/07, 1:42 PM
Harkonnendog said...: That was so awesome.

I don't know why you guys are being so hard on her. She freaked out and basically had a panic attack. It happens.

I thought her friends were awesome, too. Endlessly supportive while still laughing at her. That's how you're supposed to react when your buddy goes completely psycho.; 1/30/07, 2:17 PM
The Drill SGT said...: That was scary!

I guess I was asking:

1. Where is the mother of the bride?
2. Why didn't somebody slap some sense into her?
3. How could you let her near scissors and other sharp objects?
4. Who would want her as a marriage partner?; 1/30/07, 6:38 PM
Jerry Troutman said...: Crazy bitch.; 1/30/07, 7:43 PM
Anonymous said...: Actually, with that doo and all, I was afraid of being turned to stone if she faced the camera.

Guess it only works if you're in the room with her.; 1/30/07, 10:25 PM
The Drill SGT said...: Madisonman said: I don't remember much from my own wedding, other than exhaustion and aching feet. No one tells you how long you'll be standing.

The secret is to get married by an Army Colonel (Chaplain). We started promptly on time, and took a very short time (under 10 minutes?). We had guests arriving fashionably late (also had an ice storm the day before, so they had an excuse) as we were exiting the Chapel.

Beautiful little Chapel by the way at Walther Reed Army Hospital. New England granite protestant style. I loved the stain glass though. None of that namby pamby New Testament loaves and fishes or washing of feet stuff. All the glass was Joshua, David, St George, St Joan etc. Warriors of the Bible stuff.; 1/30/07, 11:10 PM
Peter Hoh said...: Put me down as a skeptic, too. As the clock ticks down to 23 seconds left, the "bride" tugs at a lock of hair and it looks like the whole wig moves.; 1/30/07, 11:58 PM
bearbee said...: I also want to know what she looked like coming down the aisle.

Just a guess

But I liked Harkonnendog's comments about the role of the psycho supporting friends.; 1/31/07, 7:58 AM
Anonymous said...: This is my guess of how she looked standing next to her adoring groom.; 1/31/07, 9:17 AM