Showing posts with label Sloane Crosley. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sloane Crosley. Show all posts

June 24, 2015

"This is not to suggest that all men are rude and unapologetic and that women are the inverse..."

"... but something incongruous is happening in women’s behavior that can’t be chalked up to reflexive politeness. Look at the Metropolitan Transportation Authority’s new ads warning New York straphangers against inconsiderate behavior, like eating on the subway or manspreading. Graphics depict men displaying almost all these behaviors, except, perhaps in an effort to provide gender balance, the one that advises women to avoid elbows-out personal grooming. The scenario seems ridiculously unrealistic — and not just because it’s the only one I’ve never witnessed firsthand. The ads are saying that men are far less likely to be conscious of personal space than women. So why, even after making ourselves physically smaller on the subway, are we still the ones apologizing?"

From a NYT op-ed by Sloane Crosley titled "Why Women Apologize and Should Stop."

(Please note Crosley recognizes that "I'm sorry" can be a form of assertiveness or passive aggression. And by "Please note," I mean: I bet you knuckleheads are assuming that Crosley thinks women are good and men are bad and therefore her opinion is worthless.)

ADDED: Here's what I really think about Crosley's topic. People expect women to be nicer and judge us more harshly when we strip away the verbal niceties and speak clearly and directly. It's easier to leave all that swaddling around our statements so we don't attract attention where we don't want it. What I'd say to women is: Think about whether and when you want to stop it. Do you want to be known for clear and direct statements? Maybe not!

AND: I remember when it was the man who said "I'm sorry" and the woman who contained the wisdom "Love means never having to say you're sorry."



More recently: "No it doesn't. This movie is drivel. She’s wooden and unpleasant, and no matter what he does, he’s still Ryan O’Neal."