How is it possible to be a "lookalike" with a person who is "unrecognizable"?

I'm trying to read "Simon Cowell, 63, continues to look unrecognisable with his radically different facial features as he attends a Christmas Carol event with lookalike son Eric and fiancée Lauren Silverman" — in The Daily Mail.

Does Simon Cowell see Donald Trump as a reality TV show judge?

The NYT asks a great question:

You basically created the role of the blunt-speaking judge on competition shows. A couple of years after you did it, Donald Trump did it on “The Apprentice” on NBC. When you see him campaigning, do you see a reality TV show judge?

He gives an answer, but it's not quite an answer to the question asked:

People are always drawn to people who speak bluntly. Whether you agree or disagree, you listen. You see the same thing with Bernie Sanders. The guy’s in his early 70s and every teenage kid is listening to him. I think Donald Trump understood when you’re on TV you have a tremendous platform. We all recognized that years ago... I always understood the significance — and still do now — the power of television. Nothing can compete with that.

Cowell is implicitly saying that his work on "American Idol" proved something that Trump either picked up and used or proved for himself. We learned that Americans are drawn to blunt speech. But is Trump campaigning in the persona of reality TV show judge? That was the question.

The answer was more: Blunt speech works — perhaps in many different situations, one of which is reality show judge and another one is running for office. It all happens on TV and TV is powerful, but it blunt speech especially effective on television? Does the effectiveness of blunt speech on television signify that it's entertainment and a person using it should be looked upon as an entertainer?

Another way of looking at this is: Why do some people avoid blunt speech? What's their motivation and can avoidance of bluntness be effective in some other way — a way that works on TV?

This gets my "clear speech" tag — possibly my favorite tag.

Was the Kel-from-Good-Burger correction the greatest NYT correction of all time?

Or was it something else?

(I'm partial to: "An article last Sunday about the documentary maker Morgan Spurlock, who has a new film out on the boy band One Direction, misstated the subject of his 2012 movie 'Mansome.' It is about male grooming, not Charles Manson. The article also misspelled the name of the production company of Simon Cowell, on whose 'X Factor' talent competition show One Direction was created. The company is Syco, not Psycho.")

Do we pity the man who is, against his will, forced into fatherhood?

Earlier this month, many of my readers objected to my lack of sympathy for men who, unlike women who have the right to get an abortion, find themselves dragged into fatherhood by the women they've impregnated when those women exercise their right to choose and go ahead and have those babies. I doubled down on my opinion here, on July 7th, and the comments thread there was a huge freakout, much of which you can't see now, because we did a ton of deletions. It was so bad that we ultimately had to turn off comments to stop the gush of repetitive abuse.

I hope you remember enough of that discussion to apply it to the specific context of a case in today's news:

"UN-COOL, UN-HIP, COUNTRY-FRIED SINGER WINS 'AMERICAN IDOL'..."

"SOURCE: SCOTTY TOOK NEARLY DOUBLE AMOUNT OF VOTES OVER RUNNER UP... DEVELOPING.."

Drudge, linking only to a general article about the season, purports to know the results.

But, he's right of course. Everyone who checks out DialIdol knows it and has known it for weeks. It's not some special inside knowledge. The finale show last night was terrible, mainly because they were desperately trying to make us believe it was a close competition. And they weighed Scotty down with 2 songs that had him speaking like a child — the original song "I Love You This Big" (ugh!) and some other song about schoolchildren. The guy is only 17, but his main feature is a deep voice that makes him seem much older. Why fight that with lyrics from the point of view of a child?

Anyway, speaking of old and young, the show tried to rejuvenate this season, with Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler (and without Simon Cowell), but somehow it ended up even more old fashioned. Maybe that's what happens when you don't have Simon there insulting the kids for seeming old and old fashioned.

"I can't say this is true yet, cause I don't know. Next year they asked me to possibly be the judge on 'American Idol.'"

Do you want Bret Michaels to replace Simon Cowell?

After Harry Connick night (AKA Frank Sinatra night) all of the Idol contestants are at risk.

And with only one female left in the group of 5, I bet the producers are desperately regretting that they tucked Crystal Bowersox in the center of the lineup and the judges all went so negative on her. Simon thought her lovely version of "Summer Wind" was too much like something you'd hear in a jazz club. He said that with a sneer so we'd understand what a bad thing that is.

She was criticized for sleepiness and lack of urgency. They want more of a strenuous demonstration that you really want this thing — which is the grotesque way most of the contestants act. Now, Lee Dewyze has also had a shy style, but somehow they've decided he's the one they want to win — or at least he's the one they want to provide competition for Crystal, who has long seemed like the predestined winner.

But what if, in trying to make Lee into her worthy competitor, they've let her slip through the cracks? If she goes home tonight, there will be 4 left, all male, and all pretty boring. Do you really want to tune in and not to be able to see any females? It will be grim! There was once a season that became all male when there were 3 left, and there were 2 more with a male final 2.  If Crystal goes... ratings disaster.

Anyway... Harry Connick Jr. was the best mentor guest they've ever had on the show. He didn't just listen to the contestants and give them some advice. He did the arrangements and played on stage with them. And he's so charming. Lee is lucky he kinda looks like Harry. It gave him a sexiness boost to be seen with Harry. I was thinking, yeah, he could be like that.

And here's Lee DeWyze singing his Sinatra song: "That's Life." Are you an obsessive enough reader of this blog to remember that I wrote about this song — back in 2008 in a post with photographs of a foggy cemetery?

As I drove into the cemetery, just by chance, on the radio's "Sinatra" channel, Van Morrison was singing "That's Life." I can't find the Van Morrison version, but here's Frank Sinatra. Lyrics (by Dean Kay and Kelly Gordon):

I said that's life, and as funny as it may seem
Some people get their kicks,
Stompin' on a dream
But I don't let it, let it get me down,
'Cause this fine ol' world it keeps spinning around...

That's life and I can't deny it
Many times I thought of cutting out
But my heart won't buy it
But if there's nothing shakin' come this here July
I'm gonna roll myself up in a big ball and die

What a crazy song! It's all life affirming and then, impetuously, suicidal.

So I was excited that Lee was singing that song. How would he do the crazy big-ball-and-die climax? Answer: He didn't. It was arranged to end with "this fine ol' world it keeps spinning around." Life affirming. Blah. It's "American Idol" and any possible sharp edges must be dulled.

"Controversial propositions."

With health care politics raging, it's refreshing to debate over something — anything — else, and here, John Hinderaker has just listed a bunch of controversial things he feels like asserting are true. (Via Instapundit.) I'm going to respond to the items that it amuses me to respond to.

* Much as Bob Dylan was the most authentic spokesman for his generation, Taylor Swift is the most authentic spokesman for hers.

Well, that's a trick assertion, since Bob Dylan was never about authenticity:

During the first half of the concert, after singing "Gates of Eden," Dylan got into a little riff about how the song shouldn't scare anybody, that it was only Halloween, and that he had his Bob Dylan mask on. "I'm masquerading!" he joked, elongating the second word into a laugh. The joke was serious. Bob Dylan, né Zimmerman, brilliantly cultivated his celebrity, but he was really an artist and entertainer, a man behind a mask, a great entertainer, maybe, but basically just that—someone who threw words together, astounding as they were. The burden of being something else — a guru, a political theorist, "the voice of a generation," as he facetiously put it in an interview a few years ago — was too much to ask of anyone.

But no, it's not a trick assertion because he said "most authentic." Or is it that we Baby Boomers were raging phonies, and the biggest phony would thus be the most authentic. As for Taylor Swift, she seems like a nice person. Is she bland or am I jaded to find her too bland to care about? Is one more or less authentic when nice and bland?

So, my proposition is: Authenticity is bogus.

Back to Hinderaker:

* The three most desirable actresses in movie history are Paulette Goddard, Anna Karina and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

"Desirability" isn't a good abstraction. Hinderaker likes the brunette gamine. 

* London is the world's greatest city, and Israel is the world's most exciting place.

I can live without that kind of excitement. Have you noticed Indiana?

* America's youth have never been the same since Saturday morning television went from real programming (Fury, Sky King, the Cisco Kid, etc.) to cartoons.

I can't even remember that those shows were on in the morning. When I think about "Sky King," I remember this from Bill Bryson's "Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid": "Even at six years old, and even in an age as intellectually undemanding as the 1950s, you didn't have to be hugely astute to see that a flying cowboy was a fairly flimsy premise for an action series. Sky could only capture villains who lingered at the edge of grassy landing strips and to whom it didn't occur to run for it until Sky had landed, taxied to a safe halt, climbed down from the cockpit, assumed an authoritative stance, and shouted 'Okay, boys, freeze!' — a process that took a minute or two, for Kirby Grant was not, it must be said, in the first flush of youth." Now, I have to admit, I didn't think about that at the time. What I thought about was how it seemed that there was a competition between "Sky King" and "Whirlybirds" and that everyone had an opinion about whether they preferred airplanes or helicopters. I was adamantly helicopterist.

So my controversial proposition will be: The best people prefer helicopters to airplanes. 

* The only good lawyer show in the history of television was Perry Mason.

False. "The Defenders." That was the good one. 

* The smartest person whom most Americans see on a regular basis is Simon Cowell.

Ha. Maybe. I'm going with a corollary: Americans are better able to enjoy displays of intelligence that come with a British accent. And: What seems especially smart about Cowell is that he's willing to come right out and say — quite directly — things that are true. He gets away with doing that on television because he's got a British accent. An American panelist with the same amount of time to express an opinion will need to blow at least half of it on blather intended to make us feel that he is a nice (and normal) person.

That's all I've got to say. Sorry I didn't take the bait on any of Hinderaker's historical propositions — the best and worst characters in history and so forth. Or, no, I can make one very grand assertion: The best and the worst human beings who ever lived were undoubtedly shunned by most people and forgotten soon after they died.

Do you like the idea of Howard Stern as the replacement for Simon Cowell on "American Idol"?

Can Stern-DeGeneres byplay make up for the loss of Simon and Paula?

Please don't clutter the comments with statements about hating "American Idol" and not getting why anyone but an idiot would waste time watching it. That opinion has been thoroughly aired here and does not meet the interestingness standard anymore. I'm looking for real discussion of Howard Stern and what he would mean for "American Idol" and how important Cowell is to its success.

"Soak in Simon Cowell’s evident distaste for Kara Dioguardi..."

"... ponder the physics of Victoria Beckham’s head tilt; let the shock of a contestant saying Randy Jackson’s his favorite judge sting anew."

It's hard to face a new season of "American Idol," isn't it? I've got the new episode TiVo'd, but I haven't watched it yet, and I don't know if I will. I don't even know if it's that I'm sick of the same old thing or I hate the way it's changed. If Simon Cowell is evidencing enough distaste for Kara Dioguardi, maybe I could try to tolerate it. But I can't stand Kara, and it seems absurd to spend any time feeling uneasy about the absence of Paula Abdul. And now, this is supposely Simon's last season.

(I say "supposedly," because they can always throw more money at him and get him to stay. This is a negotiation game, I assume, and Simon might be particularly interesting this season as he — essentially — makes the argument to us that he is the show and that if he starts up a new show, that's where we will want to go. That might elicit some immense new offer, especially as we fail to bond to Kara and don't really see the point of Ellen DeGeneres.)

"American Idol" is back!

Am I blogging it? Of course!

The show is an "integral part" of "American culture," we're told. By Seacrest, of course. Note: I like Ryan Seacrest.

They start off nicely with a lot of really good singers, then a few screwed up performances. They do an excellent job of creating a feeling that the country is full of really nice, optimistic young people. Some are deluded, but we love them and forgive. Some are terrific, and they always make us happy and want to reach out and embrace them. So, yeah, it's actually true that the show has become part of American culture. I know it's corny and edge-free. But still....

Lots of ultra-nastiness from Simon. He says they need a bigger stage after a fat woman sings (and does well). He tells a guy he should shave off his beard and become a female impersonator. But you know this sort of thing is trumped up. Simon must be mean. I just said the show is "edge-free," but now I remember that Simon is supposed to be the edge. He's pseudo-edge.... an integral part of the show.

Well, no one struck me that much tonight. There are an awful lot of kids who think singing very piercingly loud and emotively is the way to be good. It's bizarre to do that when you haven't had enough feedback yet. They just throw themselves out there, without any basic sense of where the notes are. And then there was that one girl who just threw herself into tanning, without any sense of proportion. She was a classic "American Idol" delusional.