"I’d send my kids to Brooklyn Friends... and I want them to play an instrument or do an activity they’re interested in, like drama. ... [W]e’ll need after-school child care. I want an SUV and a place to park it, and we’d buy groceries from Trader Joe’s and Sahadi’s and do date night at least once a week. And I really want somebody to scrub the life out of my whole house once a month.
In my future life, I’d be wearing beautiful vintage designer clothing and buying a new piece maybe every couple of months. I’d also like a membership to a gym that has Pilates classes and a sauna.... I’d be traveling monthly — little trips here and there, maybe a quick getaway with my husband or a solo trip.... and we’d just stay in a nice simple hotel with Wi-Fi. My sister lives in Majorca, Spain, so for two or three weeks, we’d go visit with our whole family. When flying international, I’d fly business, but I’d put my kids in economy...."
The article breaks down what this modest dream would cost in real life. Click through to see it all itemized, but the bottom line is $712,329 a year (after a onetime payment of $1,252,401). More dreams and realism at the link. It makes great reading for anyone who wants not to want to have children.
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Tom Wolfe did something similar by itemizing the lifestyle expense of protagonist Sherman McCoy in The Bonfire of the Vanities.
Slate
Sherman McCoy enumerated his expenses—the private school, the birthday party, the summer house, the jewelry, the taxes—and fretted that he was having difficulty making it on $1 million a year. And that was in the mid-1980s!
WSJ
There's the $21,000 monthly mortgage payments on the Park Avenue apartment, $116,000 for the place in the Hamptons (those were the days!), entertaining, restaurants, private schools and $65,000 a year for furniture and clothes. "I'm already going broke on a million dollars a year," he exclaims.
I've done all of this (except the Brooklyn part) throughout the course of my parenting life. The children made it possible. Dreaming about how I'd parent got me nowhere; having the kids made me step up to the plate.
If it were in the New Yorker, I'd have no doubt that it was parody.I don't expect NY magazine to do parody; I'm confused.
This story reminds me of a relative who owns a multi-million-dollar home on 30 acres in a northern state and a multi-million-dollar condo on the beach in SW Florida. They charter a private jet to move them between the two locations because commercial air travel, including first class, is no better than riding a Greyhound bus.
They perceive themselves living middle class lives and complain about the top 10% who they believe are Republican tax dodgers.
This story reminds me of a relative who owns a multi-million-dollar home on 30 acres in a northern state and a multi-million-dollar condo on the beach in SW Florida. They charter a private jet to move them between the two locations because commercial air travel, including first class, is no better than riding a Greyhound bus.
They perceive themselves living middle class lives and complain about the top 10% who they believe are Republican tax dodgers.
30 and under. Well, they're allowed to have dreams. In fact, 30 and under are the dreamiest years. They just rarely match up with reality. I knew nothing until last Tuesday. So your view at <30 of what you want in life is fun, but it never comes to those dreams. And those dreams? They change regularly, sometimes in a blur. Life comes at you fast, with a lot of forks in a lot of roads (wanted to squeeze one more cliched phrase in there, but you get the point).
Fun article for those who read that magazine. I guess. I'd have to interview Althouse to see if it was actually fun for her.
And yes. To a generation that mostly doesn't want to have kids anyway, it's like a '1000 reasons to not have them' article.
Of course, they could always have some of those dreams. But they'd be more reachable living somewhere other than Brooklyn or Manhattan.
This has more to do with living in the big shitty, NYC, than having children.
An autistic appeal to narcissistic indulgence and a lavish State. So far, most men and women are not biting, forging ahead with "our Posterity", and asking, demanding, that social progressives keep their paws of their children.
The article breaks down what this modest dream would cost in real life."
"I’d be traveling monthly — little trips here and there, maybe a quick getaway with my husband or a solo trip.... and we’d just stay in a nice simple hotel with Wi-Fi. My sister lives in Majorca, Spain, so for two or three weeks, we’d go visit with our whole family."
"Modest"? Really?
The 'minimums' modern young women insist on in a man -- six feet, six inches and six figures -- no longer apply. $999,999 per year just won't cut it any more. Men need to step up!
$712,329 a year (after a onetime payment of $1,252,401).
for a house in Brooklyn with 3 or 4 bedrooms.
Lets ignore the
possibilities of HAVING $712,329 a year (after a onetime payment of $1,252,401)..
Let's imagine what that'd buy you in Chippewa Falls (or Decorah, ia) ??
Let's just say, i couldn't imagine it.
Personal Question.. Do Any of You make $712,329 a year?
I think some people might misunderstand the word modest. Some of these people are asking to like much like landed gentry in old England minus the land itself. I do think Louise is the most practical and reasonable dream, and achievable. If money is tight Catholic schools have other options. The Blogger spouse went to Catholic school and did afterschool work to defray the cost.) But this is kind of a fun exercise. Now that I am on the wrong side of the 15 year in the future perspective, I can say that I am living quite the dream life. I won't itemize costs, but I will list what I have and see how it compares....
If I knew at 25 what I would want 30 years later it would look like this:
2.5 wooded acres down a dead-end gravel road. Cedar log house with 4 bedrooms and private well. Close to a small town, but only and hour from the big city.
6 Adopted kids that meant 7 2-week trips to a foreign country.
Kids homeschooled, but there are curriculum and coop expenses, so it's to exactly free.
Private music lessons, gym and Y memberships.
5 cars for all the teens and adults to drive including an 8 person minivan to fit us all as well as a sturdy f150 and 3 SUVs (we live in the sticks) which include an upscale German performance model, and one economy car (all bought used and paid for with cash so no monthly payments, but I do put money aside so have to count that.)
5 cats (don't get me started) and a dog (same here)
Value: Priceless. Cost: roughly $100,000 (until the kids started college....) If we had to buy today I guess the one time payment of 150k would be required.
How can you call this a modest dream? It's sounds more like an 'if i won the lottery' level of dream.
Making childbirth the product of voluntary decision-making in industrialized and post-industrial societies will turn out to have revolutionized the composition of the human race. Not very many people saw this coming, and surprisingly few seem to care. Apres nous, le deluge.
“It makes great reading for anyone who wants not to want to have children.”
Ugh...an example of why it’s sometimes better to split the infinitive:
It makes great reading for anyone who wants to not want to have children.
In any case:
You can do what you want, but you can’t want what you want.—Schopenhauer
Date night every week, travel every month, family trips to Europe every single year, while living in one of the most expensive cities on Earth, is "modest"?
Yeah, sure, if you're Rory John Gates, that's "modest".
Somebody did this one time to figure out what it would cost to live like the Huxtables on the Cosby Show, and allowing for inflation, the figure was similar. It's better if you inherit that kind of money, because actually working for it, the time that is going to take, is going to take a lot of the shine off of that life.
"Click through to see it all itemized, but the bottom line is $712,329 a year (after a onetime payment of $1,252,401)."
I think it all comes down to perspective. Money is relative honestly.
In Brazil, there's probably some 'indigena' mother with 12 children surviving on less than $2 a day in Belem who's kids are well-fed, happy, well-socialized...and any of them under 6 could tell you in a Brooklyn Heights Promenade minute what a woman is. Conversely the Sigma-Aldrich biologist with the 3 bed/2 bath in Brooklyn Heights Promenade would be offended at such a question, her eldest wouldn't be able to answer because he has autism, and her ex-husband currently has the daughter for the weekend and she really doesn't have time to chat because she forgot to pack her Sertraline prescription.
It's all relative honestly. Lots of money avoids the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. How could anyone live on the razor's edge like that Brazilian mother from Belem? She's such a fool, staring into the abyss like that...
It makes great reading for someone who does not want to live in New York City.
They forgot to mention the part where they want electricity and heat, which given recent actions of the New York State government will not be readily available.
Modest. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. (/Montoya)
It is a great mental exercise. Everyone age 21 and up should do it. After you peel back on some of the most extravagant wishes and reduce the number down to a more reasonable $500k (in the cited example), then one must assess the options. There are so many choices, compromises, and priorities to set. Plus, they will always change over time.
They could always move to Rochester, or Roanoke, and get all that for a fraction. But, I really doubt that's an option for most New Yorkers. Regardless, a move to socialism will eliminate all those dreams, as there will be no way to actually acquire that much wealth and income.
It's not the kids, it's the lifestyle
And I'd like to get hard-ons as easily and as often as I did when I was 25.
There’s a simple way to cut the costs dramatically: move out of the NYC metropolitan area.
My kids never set foot in public school.
I always kid that if we'd sent them there instead of private, me and there mom would both be driving vintage Ferraris...
NEAL GABLER YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD!
"Personal Question.. Do Any of You make $712,329 a year?"
My highest earning year before retirement was $56k. On the plus side, at one point, I owned houses in two states and currently, I am debt-free.
I'm ghostwriting a financial planner's book, and while researching a section on common traps like "Lifestyle Creep" it just happened two days ago to read this column from Meghan McArdle:
https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2016-04-20/parents-are-bankrupting-themselves-to-look-adequate
Back in the 1990s, if an executive recruiter came calling for a position in New York City, and you lived in a saner part of the country, the rule of thumb was that you needed at least three times your current salary to maintain your current standard of living where you lived. Probably a much higher multiple these days.
I don’t leave anything close to this life. But at $1.2 million, down payment, and $700,000 a year my kids would still be a bargain.
- Rafe
"Do Any of You make $712,329 a year?"
You forgot the part about it being after Federal, New York State, and New York City income taxes.
Here's my version:
I'd love to live in my grandparents' old neighborhood, be more than two blocks from a main street so it's nice and quiet, have three bedrooms since it's not normal for each of the kids to get their own rooms.
I'd send my kids to the local Catholic (CISE) grade school... and I'd want them to play an instrument like all of my siblings and cousins did. No drama, home life should be stable. The kids will play sports or be in clubs, so who needs after-school child care. I want a restored '67 Barracuda convertible and a minivan, and a garage to park them in. We'd buy groceries from Kroger and Aldi's, and figure out how to do a simple cheap date night on Saturdays.
And I really want kids so they can scrub the life out of my whole house once a week. In my future life, I'd be wearing beautiful vintage clothing because I dragged it out of the back of the closet when it finally came back in style again. I'd also work for the family produce company once a week on weekends so I wouldn't need to spend money on an expensive gym or Pilate's membership. In the summers, it can feel like a sauna lugging crates of fruit at Findley market.
I would travel monthly, little trips here and there, because I would be an IT consultant who would say "Yes, sir. I can be on-site first thing Monday." I would stay in a nice business traveler-oriented hotel with good Wi-Fi where the best thing on the limited cable package would be Monster Hunter reruns.
One of my sisters lives in Lawrenceburg, Indiana, so for two or three hours we'd go visit with our whole family. When driving interstate, I'd sit up front with my wife, but put our kids in our back so they'd learn how to resolve sibling conflict on their own just like I did...
Someone above mentioned that these are the dreams of the young. I, too, had those dreams. My life 40 years later is better than I imagined. It does not involve New York City, or any city, in any way.
Am I the only one who remembers dinks? (Double income, no kids)
Why zero in on children? These are unattainable dreams for most millionaires.
I’m annoyed by the false precision of the estimates. Better to say it would cost “about$720,000 annually after an initial payment of around $1.25 million.”
Of course, NY magazine writer might be innumerate.
JRoberts said...
This story reminds me of a relative….They perceive themselves living middle class lives and complain about the top 10%
Good lord! They have 2 multi-million dollar houses and regularly charter a private jet to get between them and they don’t think they’re in the top 10%?! How do people so clueless get so much money? Inheritance, I assume.
Just how much must one earn to live like a millionaire these days?
“Do Any of You make $712,329 a year?"
Reminds me of visiting a girlfriend from my college years and her husband a couple decades ago in NYC. They were artists, living in a 5k’’ rent controlled SoHo loft, built with money from her grandfather. At dinner, at a stylish restaurant with mediocre food, at a very lavish price, he told us that they needed about $700k a year to survive. Then stuck us with the bill for dinner.
"This has more to do with living in the big shitty, NYC...."
Don't be jealous!
$712k after taxes
My peak earning year was 1.712 million before taxes.
Not complaining.
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