"... in which I flung open the gates of our troubled family life. He was already talking less at that point, but his eyes told me he understood. I thought of that moment when I read that Prince Harry, in his new memoir, wrote about his father, King Charles, getting between his battling sons and saying, 'Please, boys, don’t make my final years a misery.'... My justification in writing a book I now wish I hadn’t written... was very similar to what I understand to be Harry’s reasoning. I wanted to tell the truth, I wanted to set the record straight. Naïvely, I thought if I put my own feelings and my own truth out there for the world to read, my family might also come to understand me better.... There isn’t just one truth, our truth — the other people who inhabit our story have their truths as well.... Years ago, someone asked me what I would say to my younger self if I could. Without hesitating I answered: 'That’s easy. I’d have said, "Be quiet."'"
Writes President Reagan's daughter Patti Davis, in "Prince Harry and the Value of Silence" (NYT).
Posts
62 comments:
Did she sell 14 copies?
Nobody remembers.
Talk about making yourself the story...
This kind of thing isn't about "telling the truth." It's about hurting the other person.
Good to know that some people grow up and learn from their mistakes.
Ron Regan Jr always available for comment…
You know, if you wanted your family to know you better, you could have just given them the manuscript to read.
Patti Davis is another example of regression to the mean in the children of powerful and accomplished people.
There's a reason for not "airing your dirty laundry".
Mostly because all those sordid bastards that will read that stuff, and extrapolate new meanings.
Cue the sackful of feathers Jewish parable.
Like words, once they're out, you can't get them back.
Weird. I immediately thougt of Patti Davis and Ron Reagan junior when I saw Prince harry's book.
Has there ever been a POTUS that had such worthless kids? Reagan had 4 children, two never got married, one was childless and adopted an African child, and only one has a family with kids. None of them graduated from college or did anything remarkable.
Patti has lived off being Reagan's daughter for 50 years. First as the rebellious leftwing daughter who hated his politics and refused to use the name Reagan. Then as a dutiful daughter who came to recognize he was good man. I had hoped she had finally gone away, but here she is - AGAIN. I think she'll keep using her father's memory for $ till she's dead.
The other loser, Ron Reagan Junior seems to have quit the spotlight and gone into obscurity. But I expect him to pop up soon with a book about his hidden life as a closeted Gay, who's finally found the courage..blah blah.
There’s only THE truth…
It's really hard for most people to "stay silent" when someone dangles a giant check in front of them. When the cash flows, that is when people's ethics are put to the test.
I can relate wholeheartedly.
Just before our mother’s passing some very hurtful things were being said, which became sort of cemented after her passing. Two years later we’re still struggling with it. It’s like her death froze the bad feelings in place and we can’t break free of them as a family. It’s as if forgiveness of each other would betray some greater truth, our own.
“To love on my own terms… those are the only terms anybody ever knows.” -Citizen Kane
Harry is a self-indulgent twit.
"There isn’t just one truth, our truth — the other people who inhabit our story have their truths as well"
When did the word "truth" become interchangeable with "rationalization"?
Regrets are a little late now.
No pet, there is no your truth or my truth there only THE TRUTH.
Now move along and get over your self.
And now the ferret-faced, ginger Prince Quimby is on 60
Minutes.
Big Mike said...
Regrets are a little late now.
I'm sure she has a few.
But, too few to mention.
I guess too late for her contemporary self to follow her advice in comparing herself to Prince Harry.
She convinced herself that his eyes said that he understood. So she feels better. Good for her. But she seems to not be taking the “be quiet” advice.
Harry and Meghan’s jealousy of heir William and wife Kate is so obvious yet Harry claims Prince Charles was jealous of Meghan stealing his spotlight.
Harry wrote that Charles had already experienced being outshined as a royal by Princess Diana and could not deal with "a novel and resplendent" figure who might take the attention away from him and his wife, Camilla, Queen Consort.
Someone must tell Harry that Meghan is no Diana and Charles is the King of England—he has nothing to fear from Meghan Markel, a Grade B or C list American actress. And Harry is never going to be King.
That is a natural progression for most of us- the things we did when younger come to seem far less wise than they did at the time. You live and you learn.
Another malcontent offspring looking for daddy’s love, so unoriginal
Who do we despise more, Patti or Harry? Tough one.
My justification in writing a book I now wish I hadn’t written... was very similar to what I understand to be Harry’s reasoning. ... ..We Both Wanted, to MAKE MORE MONEY
I really hope that I never sink low enough to make negative comments about either my parents or my children . . . . . . however, I can kind of see how in some limited cases, it might be roughly appropriate for some - given that those relationships are big drivers in the life (good and the bad) you have - and it's unique.
What's absolutely inexplicable to me is to watch someone go out of their way to insult an aunt or uncle. Really! I don't know her name, but a believe that Donald Trump has a name-calling niece that shows up on MSNBC from time to time. Not only is that pathetic, it's desperately pathetic.
So now she says this? This late? Decades after causing pain and coming across as very unking and unforgiving back then? And after being trotted out for years by the left to bash Reagan?
Yeah, Harry is either revealing his own mental instability or just starting to realize how much he abandoned for (ugg) Meghan. Divorces tend to occur at the 4 year, 7 year, and 12 year marks. I think he's coming up on 7 years now.
You know who else has caused perhaps irreparable damage to their family, airing out their dirty laundry?
Will and Jada Smith.
Those so-called Red Table talks were just devastating to that marriage.
If the Royal Family had a Golden Retriever named Scout dog, and the brothers got into a fistfight, Scout would knock down the cat-loving brother down on the ground and stand on his chest.
And both brothers would be like, "Holy shit, fight over!"
And Prince Charles would yell from his bedroom, "What's going on?"
And the sons would say: "Nothing, Dad."
Prince Charles: "I better not read about this shit in the Daily Mirror!"
There’s only THE truth…
never fuck a celebrity!
When I was a kid, maybe 22
6 foot 2
220 pounds
My Mom said I was "Not wearing that sweater to church."
It had a hole in it.
I said, "I'll wear what I want to wear."
My Mom
5 foot 6
110 pounds
ripped my sweater off my body
I told this story in an all-male Bible study 20 years later
and all the men yelled at me
How could this be published in the New York Times? A sympathetic article about the second most grievous offender against leftist orthodoxy? How? Because it's Patti executing orders directed at Hunter Biden.
There's also this fundamental confusion in her writings regarding truth and opinion, but that's to be expected from a doctrinaire feminist. Feminism cannot coexist with objective truth, that's why its doctrines are so vague and nebulous.
She should’ve piped up a year or two ago.
I enjoy the royal family so much more than the Kardashians. There’s birthrights, history, fashion, money, and thankfully only an occasional peek behind the curtain. Yes, Harry will come to regret telling “his” story, if he doesn’t already.
If you are a mature adult, you eventually realize that there is a statute of limitations for the failings of their parents.
For some people, there is a surplus of “ifs” in that statement.
I remember Michael Reagan as the faithful son. He had a radio show for awhile, and it was okay. Probably was only given a show because of his name. He wasn't nearly as talented as someone like Rush. But he definitely loved and respected his father, and it was good to hear, after the betrayals by the two lesser children. I don't mind an adult having different politics than his or her parents, obviously. But the way Patti and Ron Jr. willingly gave ammunition to their father's enemies was reprehensible.
This:
"Weird. I immediately thought of Patti Davis and Ron Reagan junior when I saw Prince harry's book.
Has there ever been a POTUS that had such worthless kids? Reagan had 4 children, two never got married, one was childless and adopted an African child, and only one has a family with kids. None of them graduated from college or did anything remarkable.
Patti has lived off being Reagan's daughter for 50 years. First as the rebellious leftwing daughter who hated his politics and refused to use the name Reagan. Then as a dutiful daughter who came to recognize he was good man. I had hoped she had finally gone away, but here she is - AGAIN. I think she'll keep using her father's memory for $ till she's dead.
The other loser, Ron Reagan Junior seems to have quit the spotlight and gone into obscurity. But I expect him to pop up soon with a book about his hidden life as a closeted Gay, who's finally found the courage..blah blah."
______________________________________________________________________
Oh Boy, quite a Bill of Particulars there, but let me take a shot: First of all, why is graduating from college the standard of achievement? Maybe it was back then, but Patti Davis Reagan is a brilliant writer, no degree required. In fact, her writing's somehow more worthy without formal schooling than if she had some bloated creative writing credential.
We don't have much info on Ron Jr. , other than that he was a Ballet Dancer, which clashed with The Gipper's macho image, and much was made of that, and very entertaining. I remember the picture of Ron Jr. premiere night, in ballet tights hugging Mrs. Reagan, as Gipper looked on with a frozen smile. "Frozen Insincerity" ----wrote Joan Didion, frequently about Nancy Reagan, but the public lived for these glamorous antics, phoniness, superficial smiles and all.
Whatever grievances about Michael Reagan, you can blame mama Jane Wyman, who incidentally, did just that---always refused to air her dirty laundry. Miss Wyman never wrote an autobiography despite being offered big bucks, never even spoke about her famous first Husband. Legendary silence aside, her questionable mothering skills are to blame for whatever the deficiencies in Michael Reagan. That was a time when most actresses of the day Joan Crawford, etc were adopting children to feed their own personal vanity (pretty much the reason actresses of today adopt). Although, Reagan and Wyman did a fairly good job raising Maureen, their one biological child, who always seemed spunky and spirited to me.
The fact that Patti and Ron Jr. never had children themselves is a problem, why? Was it another (giddy) humiliation for Mrs. Reagan? I never thought so. It seemed to me that Mrs. Reagan, vain as any other actress, would never want to be thought of as a "Granny" anyway. Too aging. Choosing to not have any children always seemed very contemporary, and avant-garde at the time, and saves Mrs. R from having to pretend more superficial relationships.
Look, when you take into account all other Presidential children, boring Amy Carter, the Nixon daughters, the Bush Twins---who are doing what? ---When you think about all the advantages Chelsea Clinton was handed and she's still a bore------ Patti and Ron, renegades as they were always called--much more entertaining. Reagan kids had the name recognition, but unlike others, never lived off their parents, never given money, forced to make their own way. I'd much rather follow Reagan Rebel Renegades, than all the other boring, coddled trust fund babies.
Years ago, someone asked me what I would say to my younger self if I could. Without hesitating I answered: 'That’s easy. I’d have said, "Be quiet."'
I think it was Gandma that advised, 'never skip an opportunity to shut up"
Was reading about KJB and her 7 figure book deal. Don't know how smart she is. But with her exuberance grilling the lawyers in her first couple of cases, it is clear she believes she has to make up for some shortcoming. Better to keep your mouth shut and let others think you fool, than open it and remove all doubt.
There is real life lessons here, for those smart enough to see them.
When I was a kid, ease dropping on the adults, a man asked dad what he thought about the topic. Dad said he didn't know enough about to form a decent question.
Harry is breaking the only rule my mother laid down for her four sons: "You boys are going to be friends. Your father and I love you all the same. You are not rivals. You are entitled to your own opinions. You can disagree, but you are going to be friends."
And that is the way that it is.
Patti might have said something earlier but she had to wait to make sure Harry is getting slammed for his attacks on his family.
Who do we despise more, Patti or Harry? Tough one.
@Political Junkie, consider the power of the word “AND”. Nothing wrong with despising both equally.
Barbara said...
"Yes, Harry will come to regret telling “his” story, if he doesn’t already."
Yes, but Patti is breaking new ground by showing that after your tell-all book, later in life you can publish your anti-tell-all book. Then your children could tell-all abut anti-tell-all and so on, down an immense, dwindling vista. It could be a series on Amazon.
Over Christmas I tried to imagine a Hallmark Christmas movie based on a Meghan Markle character. You know, goes to place X, meets Y, realizes own false values, clinch in falling snow while Silver Bells plays. The only scenario I had any success with was A Christmas Carol. The ghost of Christmas Future shows Meghan selling Halston on the CVS channel. But it went wrong when I pictured Meghan scurrying up to Balmoral Castle through the falling snow on Xmas day and bursting in on the Royal Family and on Harry who has his fifth wife ... No, I couldn't make that work, either.
When Ronald Reagan died, the ex Patti Leadon was pretty sad and despondent. The apologized grievously for her behavior to her dad. Don’t know if it took, but I saw her (on TV), but it looked real to me. Incredibly, I saw Ron Jr.’s insipid Freedom From Religion ad yesterday. In Gulf Shores. The only thing that comes close is that Ban Natural Gas billboard (Not exact words, but that’s what it says) as you’re crossing the boarder from Beaumont to St Charles on I-10.
A liberal Baby Boomer woman, very typical of her cohort, except for her father's accomplishments. She recognized one tiny part of her own mistake, but I doubt she ever recognized just how great those accomplishments of her father really were. She was still bashing him fairly recently.
Thanks for such an intelligent and well-written response "Nice". Reading it, I realized I had been judging "the Reagan Kids" by the wrong standard. I was using the POTUS standard when I should have used Hollywood.
After all, Reagan, Wyman and Nancy were all actors. And Reagan didn't go into serious Politics until 1966, when he was elected California Governor. Before that he was - more or less - in showbiz. By 1966 Maureen and Michael were adults or close to it. Patti Davis was 14, and Ron Junior was 8.
Compared to children of other Hollywood actors, the four Reagan kids aren't that bad. No drug overdoses. No sexual scandals. No Financial frauds or bankruptcies. No cultish religions or sad failed attempts to become stars.
But I'm still looking forward to Ron junior's "Coming out of the closet at 65" book.
My unsolicited advice is Be Quiet" she said - at great length, and without a hint of ironic self-awareness.
"Years ago, someone asked me what I would say to my younger self if I could."
Well, sure. What I would say is, "Stop partying and invest all that money you're making, so I'll be rich!". But from what I recall of my younger self, I doubt he would have taken that advice. He had his own priorities.
I don't know if it's something about the British royal family, or monarchies in general, or families in general, but there's always been intense friction between generations among the Mountbatten-Windsor-Saxe-Coburg-Gotha-Hanoverians. You can see Harry's conflicts in his father's life, and further back in Princess Margaret's and Edward VIII's.
Harry's not as much of an outlier or outrider in the family as he's made out to be. His grandmother and great-grandmother were the superglue who held the family together, against the desires of many of the other royals, and now that the two Elizabeths are gone, the royals are drifting apart.
The story of the Reagans and their children is the story of California -- and indeed of America -- over the last 70 or 80 years. Affluence does away with traditional restraints and the sense of responsibility. Ron Jr. and Patti seemed horrible back in the Eighties, but now they don't stand out so much.
donald said..."Incredibly, I saw Ron Jr.’s insipid Freedom From Religion ad yesterday. In Gulf Shores."
I was surprised to see the Ron Jr ad a couple of times, too, over the holidays. (NYC area tv stations.)
Lem Former Twitter Aficionado said...
I can relate wholeheartedly.
Just before our mother’s passing some very hurtful things were being said,...
Sadly, saw this with best friend's family. As matriarch approached her final months one daughter began to air her childhood hurt and pain. The emotional turmoil left deep division amongst the siblings. A decade later two sisters still are not talking to each other despite my friend's occasional attempts to reconcile the two.
I swear I proof read the above before posting.
Somebody is worried that Ashley Biden's diary is gonna be had to keep under wraps.
Why do people think it's okay to hurt their families?
I understand blurting something hurtful out. We all speak before we think. But to publish a book? What thought process leads to such grave mistakes?
"Years ago, someone asked me what I would say to my younger self if I could. Without hesitating I answered: 'That’s easy. I’d have said, "Be quiet".
And yet....
For some years I was kind of regretful that our family was a bunch of stoic Germans* who never talked a whole lot or let feeeeelings show and all that stuff. I have recently come to appreciate the almost complete lack of drama we engage in. If there's a mantra for this, it's Mind Your Own Business.
* German on one side, Scot/English on the other, actually.
Those people stir a lot of emotions here.
In most monarchies, and the Brits are an excellent example, a party or faction inevitably arises around the crown prince, and inevitably finds itself in conflict with the old man's establishment. The differences are generational, personal, and political at once, even if a united front is presented to the outside world. A similar dynamic can sometimes be seen among royal siblings.
There's a good chance that Michael Reagan and other Hollywood adoptees came from the baby factory run by Memphis's Georgia Tann and her crony Judge Camille Kelly.
Amadeus 48 mentions four brothers. Unfortunately for my mother, after our father died she had virtually no control over her four sons, especially the oldest, as they grew up. I was never friends with him (I was second) but we never came to blows in her presence. In fact, we rarely saw one another except when she was present, by mutual preference.
Wow. Just, wow.
"Nice" interesting comment about- "...Patti Davis Reagan is a brilliant writer.."
I'm assuming you where her editor given the over the top comment about "brilliant writer"?
My experience is that I question whether "Patti Davis Reagan" actually wrote her own book. I would put my money on a 'ghost writer' or heavy editing by the publishers editors.
The Royals are, at this point, an entertainment phenomenon more than anything else. That being said, is it really that strange that are becoming the narcissists narcissist?
As a phenomenon, the mere fact that so many people pay attention to the doings of these people and other "celebrities" is mind-boggling: Who cares what the Kardashians are up to?
I could kinda get why someone might care, if any of these people still had real power in the world, but they're all neutered, at this point. No royal family, anywhere, is all that likely to be out there starting wars or undertaking anything beyond being part of the opening ceremonies for the latest local government porkbarrel project... As it is? Who cares what they get up to?
“There isn’t just one truth, our truth — the other people who inhabit our story have their truths as well"
When did the word "truth" become interchangeable with "rationalization"?
I had a long discussion about this just the other day w/a friend who I thought had a bit more sense. E/person has their own truth, she says. I countered: e/person has their belief. There’s the truth and then there’s the fracturing into how e/individual experiences and feels, but that’s not truth.
On and on. Round and round.
She’s an Ekart Tolle, Depak Chopra lady.
I’m the book of Proverbs…
Not to say she isn’t Christian or a good person.
Relativism. It’s what’s for breakfast.
PS. She only reads nonfiction. Especially biographical books.
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