"Despite the progress of the MeToo movement, many girls continued to worship older men and were drawn into toxic relationships with harmful power dynamics, she said.
'The whole idea of conferred specialness — "You go to bed with me, I’ll make you special" — we’ve seen a lot of that with Harvey Weinstein, Roger Ailes'... Kennedy and de Vegh first met in 1958, when she was starting at Radcliffe College, a women’s liberal arts institution in Cambridge, Massachusetts. He gave a campaign speech in a Boston ballroom while running for re-election to the Senate. He appeared at her table, telling her date: 'Give me your seat, so a tired old man can sit next to a pretty girl.' He then invited her to an event the following week, and soon the affair began. 'I was 20 years old with a full supply of hormones and madly in love with this compelling man,' she recalled."
Does DeVegh's story "serve as a warning to young women"? I don't see the warning. It seems designed to inspire envy. Do "girls... worship older men" or do young women fall madly in love with handsome, charming, highly accomplished 40-year-old men? Where's the part where DeVegh explains how the relationship was "toxic" and "harmful"?
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39 comments:
The sun rises every day. The moon has a one month cycle. An Earth year lasts around 365 days.
Young women are attracted to older and wealthy and powerful men.
None of these facts should be news to anyone over the age of 16. None of these facts are restricted to any culture, era, politics, or contemporary moral standards.
It was "toxic and harmful" because she didn't get anything but sex out of it and is now trying to parlay that into a play for sympathy. Look at poor meeeee.
Her encounter with JFK was not in the realm of employer/employee sexual harassment. She knew he was married, yet slept with him anyways. Women need to take responsibility for their own sexual power that attracts these men in the first place. They can always say no, especially when it's in a social situation.
The unstated premise of this, like all, #MeToo stories is that women lack agency. The Taliban would no doubt agree.
I don't get it either- she was 20, so both were adults, and she didn't work with him either.
The date should have told him to go sit somewhere else- that is what I would have done.
Women who’ve been burned can give all the warnings they want — young women will continue to let themselves be used sexually by men with wealth and power. Feminists may try to shame and humiliate the men who take advantage of this, but it ain’t gonna work and particularly it ain’t gonna work as long a there are exemptions for powerful Democrats like Bill Clinton and Handsy Joe Biden, among others. Fortunately for her, Tara Reid didn’t end up in the bottom of a pond like Mary Jo Kopechne.
At least the women who submitted to the casting couches of Harvey Weinstein and Roger Ailes got something from it. Apparently all that happened for the women who provided sexual favors for David Letterman and Matt Lauer is they got to keep their jobs.
I find it ironic that with all the Trump exaggerations and hyperbolic statements the one that gave him the most trouble appears true. Celebrities can get away with a lot of stuff with willing participants. Certain people can do anything to others. Freely. Follow the science. The "victim" freely chooses the role at the time. Apparently. Regrets 63 years later?
Or do we go back to the idea thar young adult females are incapable of logic and sense?
Women are attracted to power in a man. If he also happens to be handsome, then it becomes a sexual attraction on top of the power attraction. That is why it has always been and continues to be a thing, even in these times of the great purge. It's not so much a 'worship' as it is a natural attraction. And if the woman is interested in halls of power- such as the political or academic ones- a powerful, handsome man in those fields can be intoxicating. Or in sports- an accomplished athlete can fill the bill.
Keep in mind, the very same attraction works for lesbians as well. If a woman is attracted to other women, they will feel the pull of the powerful.
Men on the other hand are, again, simpler. Pay attention to us and we're all in. Especially if breasts are present. We're still carrying around stuff from our Paleolithic brethren. We are who we are and all the comments on a blog in 2021 won't change that.
If she wasn't an employee/underling and of legal age; let the games begin.
And yes, the Kennedy's seem to all have a horndog gene, and their antics (waitress sandwich, anyone?) went unreported during their lifetimes.
But she got to fuck a future president, so she's got that going for her...
So, at least she was 20, and not 16
And at least she wasn't an intern in his office, so there was no power imbalance that way
"Dear women, stop being hypergamous, the way evolution has designed you to be. Oh, and by the way, I bagged JFK when I was 20!"
"or do young women fall madly in love with handsome, charming, highly accomplished 40-year-old men? "
I think you forgot to add 'powerful' and 'high status'.
I won't say that all women are hypergamous, but a fair number are.
I didn't read the whole article since it's behind a paywall but at what point are women acknowledged to have agency?
A little late. She wanted it. She did it. And now she is bitching about it. She was in her 20's. Old enough to make her own decisions. HER fault. I am sick of women blaming men for things they were once okay with, that now they wish they didn't do. And I say that as a woman. I remember girls doing things I was surprised that they would do...but nobody forced them. Don't blame others for things YOU do.
I read her entire piece, and it seems like it was an unfulfilling relationship that froze her life for its four year duration. Of course many women in their early twenties have such relationships, but not with a fairy tale prince.
Our Professor asks...
Do "girls... worship older men" or do young women fall madly in love with handsome, charming, highly accomplished 40-year-old men?
Embrace The Power, of the word 'AND' ! ! !
for example:
Do young girls like being pursued (and Caught) by Alfa males? Or; do they like Bragging about it?
can be much more easily written as:
Young girls like being pursued (and Caught) by Alfa males; AND they like Bragging about it!!
It sounds like she's saying age alone is enough to make a relationship abusive, regardless of its other attributes. Why can't a young person prefer an older person? (I originally wrote "young woman" and maybe should have left it in given that this complaint would never have been lodged against a cougar--as such, it contains its own bit of sexism.) Why does DeVegh think she gets to tell other people who they get to be attracted to?
It doesn't sound as though she were that difficult to seduce. JFK wasn't especially handsome, IMO, although certainly more so than Weinstein or Ailes. I think it's the seduction of power and celebrity. And some young women are twits. But doing exactly what they want to do.
My guess as to what made the relationship toxic is that he never married her, and never had any intention of doing so. Seducing young women for the sole purpose of having sex with them used to be considered bad behavior. Now its called Saturday.
Who doesn't know that JFK was a cad and a philanderer? But this story is about an (yes, powerful, blah blah) adult man seducing an adult woman who fell “madly in love” with him -- as if that were something extraordinary in the history of the world. BFD.
MeToo, Schmetoo.
From the post: "Where's the part where DeVegh explains how the relationship was "toxic" and "harmful"?"
That wasn't the point. The point is to perpetuate "MeToo" by using a dead guy from their party as an example. Then the use of "MeToo" against the next guy from the other party can be deemed justifiable. It's sort of a reverse tu quoque.
She was madly in love.
She explained in Air Mail News, a digital weekly: “Young woman, great man. Predictable outcome: heartbreak for her, no consequences for him.”
OK, that's the lesson.
In love with a married man? What kind of woman was she?
The kind that when an attractive, rich/famous/powerful guy comes on to her, she
"let's them do anything."
"Anything?"
"Anything, kiss them, grab them by the pussy, anything"
Note that when Trump was taped saying this, it was in response to his failure to even kiss one lovely he had made a move on, so it was success-bragging in theory after an actual rejection In Real Life. A rejection which he fully accepted.
Lots of women are upset at Trump for saying this; and lots of male Trump-haters say it shows how terrible he is for saying it (tho they're unlikely to be as actually upset about it). But few of those women are as upset at Democrats who actually abuse their power and harass young beauties - look at rapist Roman Polanski getting an academy award. (Not rape-rape???)
Lots of women would have loved to have been seduced by JFK, or even RFK, or even lying, cheating Teddy K, the "lion of the senate", supported by so many feminists because he supports abortion (despite the Pope being against it.)
There were even celebrities willing to give oral sex to Bill Clinton; and less publicly Obama was a heartthrob for many. Not to mention cheating John Edwards, or recently Cuomo, or even Senator Biden (according to Tara Reade, who seems far less believed, despite lots of circumstantial evidence, than was C. Ford against Kavanaugh with false evidence).
Many men, if not most, are striving for success, wealth, fame, riches precisely to become this attractive to many women.
Many claim Marilyn Monroe also had a JFK fling - the desire can go both ways.
..."explains how the relationship was "toxic" and "harmful"?"
Bet it didn't do his back a hell of a lot of good either.
The more I hear and read about JFK, the less respect I have for the man.
No wonder they shot him.
It's not surprising that all your low testosterone men dislike JFK. He was either an excruciating pain or deathly ill from the time he was in grade school until he had his head blown off. He was probably not going to live 10 years longer anyway. No doubt all that young beaver help to take the pain away.
I could have sworn that there was a societal norm that frowned on sexual affairs before marriage. Particularly if one of the partners was already married.
Maybe if she had followed that norm she'd have a different set of regrets?
I read the piece. It seems part humble brag. There were worse men to have an affair with than JFK. You won't read about any women coming forward to claim that they had a years long affair with Harvey Weinstein and how their heads were turned by his wealth and glamour. Best to keep mum about it.....A fair number of the bon ton in Hollywood got it on with Marilyn Monroe. In their memoirs they admit it and claim how sorry they are that they were not able to help that poor girl, but the real explanation is that they fucked Marilyn Monroe and they want the world to know about it.
" Fortunately for her, Tara Reid didn’t end up in the bottom of a pond like Mary Jo Kopechne."
Was there an autopsy? Could May Jo have been pregnant?
"She was madly in love.
She explained in Air Mail News, a digital weekly: “Young woman, great man. Predictable outcome: heartbreak for her, no consequences for him.”"
No consequences for him? I always thought that too until a couple of years ago when I read that she was also dating Lee Harvey Oswald at the time.
Ah, a dog humps man story. C'mon, London Times. Where is man humps dog?
"20 years old with a full supply of hormones and madly in love" is a euphemism for homewrecking slut.
Readering said...
I read her entire piece, and it seems like it was an unfulfilling relationship that froze her life for its four year duration.
Disclaimer: I have almost no respect for JFK to lose. I'm not defending JFK here. Married men you cheat on their wives are scum.
That said, "girl has 'relationship' with married politician, who's probably banging at least another 3 - 4 women on the side, and is upset that the 'relationship' is 'unfulfilling'"?
WTF?
What part of this is supposed to be a surprise?
Where's the part where DeVegh explains how the relationship was "toxic" and "harmful"?
He was both white and male. What more do you need?
BS I hear a lot:
16 year olds should be able to vote.
18 year olds shouldn't be held to the terms of student loans.
20 year olds should.... what? Not be allowed to sleep with older/powerful men? Or be compensated when the man doesn't ditch his family for her? Just what would the author suggest.
You-Have-Been-WAAAAAAARNED!(?) Sure, sure, Mom and Dad warned me about a lot of things I did anyway. I ain't writing it up for public consumption.
"JFK wasn't especially handsome, IMO"
Plus he had that comical voice. How did people back then listen to him without picturing Katharine Hepburn?
It is a lesson that has been out there for many, many years, in life and in literature - a young woman is enthralled by an older, more worldly man who happens to be married and she is later disillusioned when he doesn't leave his wife for her. Nevertheless, some young women continue to ignore the lesson until they experience the consequences for themselves.
There doesn't seem to be any special need for de Vegh to share details of this affair now. Kennedy's history with women has been known for decades, so adding one more conquest doesn't really make any difference. Was this disclosure just self-aggrandizement?
'No wonder they shot him.'
Tough but fair. I'll accept it.
'No doubt all that young beaver help to take the pain away.'
The '60s were a pre-#metoo golden era of horn-doginess (peace be upon it).
People today are more hypocritical than the Victorian when it comes to sex and young women. She had a trilling sex adventure with JFK, the ultimate Alpha male who become POTUS. Maybe, like Monica, she dreamed that JFK would make her Wife No. 2.
Its almost laughable the way people talk about it. A young woman goes after a married man, who's very attractive, and she's his mistress. But the person at fault is the Man. LIke always. Because women only do wrong - when forced to -by a man. LOL.
In this case, the old woman is bragging, and disguising it as a morality tale.
Welcome "reproachful boast," son of "humble brag." Just as people who want to brag have to clothe their boasts in modesty or humility, now they feel they can only brag about their transgressions by cloaking their boasts in condemnation of somebody else.
Howard said...
It's not surprising that all your low testosterone men dislike JFK.
It's not surprising that honorees, amoral weasels like a guy who's word was worthless.
My problem isn't with him banging willing younger women. My problem is with him doing it while married to a wife, one whom he swore a solemn oath to "cleave only unto".
He got married in the Catholic Church. He swore solemn oaths based on that, then violated them.
No, I don't care how much physical pain he was in.
And yes, I know that he was wearing a back brace the day he was shot. A back brace that kept him upright so the second shot could kill him.
A back brace he needed because he'd been screwing around with someone not his wife, and it had hurt his back so much he needed the brace.
But thank you for sharing your true colors, Howard
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