February 13, 2021

"Some owners even chose to be buried at the pet cemetery, since they could not be buried alongside their pets at human cemeteries..."

"'It was so important for some people that they stay together that they decided to be interred in a pet cemetery.'"


The quote is from Allison C. Meier, "a writer and licensed New York City sightseeing guide who gives tours of the city’s cemeteries." 

Another quote from Meier: "The way that people refer to their pets changes. On a lot of old dog graves, they call them a gentleman — like, 'He’s a great gentleman. He lived like a gentleman.'"

The original meaning of "gentleman" is "A man of gentle birth, or having the same heraldic status as those of gentle birth; properly, one who is entitled to bear arms, though not ranking among the nobility... but also applied to a person of distinction without precise definition of rank" (OED).

Later — and by later, I mean in the 16th century — it became "A man of superior position in society, or having the habits of life indicative of this; often, one whose means enable him to live in easy circumstances without engaging in trade, a man of money and leisure. In recent use often employed (esp. in ‘this gentleman’) as a more courteous synonym for ‘man’, without regard to the social rank of the person referred to." And apparently, without regard to the species of the being referred to.

Are you teaching your sons to be gentlemen (with or without the use of that word)? Are you teaching your dogs? 

35 comments:

rhhardin said...

Gentlemen's agreement, what women never understand and so can't do. The grudge dominates for women.

Feelings over structure.

Crimso said...

Our latest addition is an 8 month old Australian shepherd mix. Not a gentleman by any stretch. More of a Hunter S. Thompson.

Kassaar said...

“I do wish thou wert a dog, that I might love thee something.” (William Faulkner)

chickelit said...

The Spanish word for pet is mascota. Enough said.

Jamie said...

I am trying to get my girl to be a lady. Calling in the cavalry (ahem) soon to get a handle on her leash aggression as well as her passive-aggressive tendency to control our behavior by playing submissive. She's sweet but unruly at present.

Bob Smith said...

Not much of a believer in afterlives and all that but my daughters Lab and I are coming to the end of our time simultaneously. I’d like nothing better than to have his ashes interred with mine. Or scattered with mine at the seashore he loved so much.

NorthOfTheOneOhOne said...

On a lot of old dog graves, they call them a gentleman...

It's a genteel way of saying; "We cut off his balls!".

Christy said...

North wins the internet today.

mikee said...

My first pet, from babyhood to 14 years old, was a collie named Princess. I recall that when she was ready to die she walked off our property, something she usually never did, and into the woods about 100 yards. She lay down under a lovely cedar and died in the night. My father found her and buried her the next morning. It was a dignified end for a distinguished lady dog who accompanied us kids everywhere through our childhoods.

Our two sequentially owned cocker spaniels also exemplified that breed. One nearly died of catching a squirrel, and was saved only by my father's rapid response - he pulled the dead squirrel out of the dog's throat before Ferocious suffocated. The dog later died, run over chasing Dad's car. The second cocker died chasing Mom's car a few years later. Idiots. Both were buried in the back yard with full honors, because although stupid as 2x4s, they were full of love and the joy of life.

Cats are commodities, and ours were replaced as needed.

Rob said...

The most popular pet name is Maybe?

Ann Althouse said...

The most popular name for a cat over the past 100 years is Tiger.

Princess vs. Tiger — that says something about dog people vs. cat people.

WWIII Joe Biden, Husk-Puppet + America's Putin said...

someone is going to do it... so... here. Might as well get to it.

Kevin said...

Lucky for me that none of my pets ever died, they all moved to a farm where they could roam happy and be free

John henry said...

"dogs are people too"

John Henry

John henry said...

But "on the internet nobody knows you are a dog"

Old joke going back to at least 1989.

John Henry

Eleanor said...

A dog who is a gentleman takes his business outside, takes food gently when it's offered by hand, greets welcome guests with a friendly tag wag without jummping on them, and doesn't hump furniture or human legs.

Oso Negro said...

Blogger Jamie said...
I am trying to get my girl to be a lady. Calling in the cavalry (ahem) soon to get a handle on her leash aggression as well as her passive-aggressive tendency to control our behavior by playing submissive. She's sweet but unruly at present.


I have had the same issue with some of my ex-wives.

DavidUW said...

Sons only get trained to be gentlemen by fathers.

How many sons have fathers raising them?

rhhardin said...

Rules about treating women are a minor part of gentleman. It's mostly about unwritten rules that lower the economic cost of competition by adhering to them even though you don't have to.

rhhardin said...

With gentlemen's rules: not so much capital spent on defense.

Meade said...

“Sons only get trained to be gentlemen by fathers.”

Step sons get trained by step fathers. Step gentlemen.

Joe Smith said...

Or is it a Pet Sematary?

Meade said...

“Rules about treating women are a minor part of gentleman.”

Rules about treating your own mother is THE major rule of gentleman. 1. No hitting. 2. No yelling. 3. No lying. No quarreling. No failing to have compassion.

Ann Althouse said...

You guys are making me think of the end of the Scalia dissent in the VMI case:

----------------- quoted----------------

In an odd sort of way, it is precisely VMI's attachment to such old fashioned concepts as manly "honor" that has made it, and the system it represents, the target of those who today succeed in abolishing public single sex education. The record contains a booklet that all first year VMI students (the so called "rats") were required to keep in their possession at all times. Near the end there appears the following period piece, entitled "The Code of a Gentleman":

"Without a strict observance of the fundamental Code of Honor, no man, no matter how `polished,' can be considered a gentleman. The honor of a gentleman demands the inviolability of his word, and the incorruptibility of his principles. He is the descendant of the knight, the crusader; he is the defender of the defenseless and the champion of justice . . . or he is not a Gentleman.

A Gentleman . . .

Does not discuss his family affairs in public or with acquaintances.

Does not speak more than casually about his girl friend.

Does not go to a lady's house if he is affected by alcohol. He is temperate in the use of alcohol.

Does not lose his temper; nor exhibit anger, fear, hate, embarrassment, ardor or hilarity in public.

Does not hail a lady from a club window.

A gentleman never discusses the merits or demerits of a lady.

Does not mention names exactly as he avoids the mention of what things cost.

Does not borrow money from a friend, except in dire need. Money borrowed is a debt of honor, and must be repaid as promptly as possible. Debts incurred by a deceased parent, brother, sister or grown child are assumed by honorable men as a debt of honor.

Does not display his wealth, money or possessions.

Does not put his manners on and off, whether in the club or in a ballroom. He treats people with courtesy, no matter what their social position may be.

Does not slap strangers on the back nor so much as lay a finger on a lady.

Does not `lick the boots of those above' nor `kick the face of those below him on the social ladder.'

Does not take advantage of another's helplessness or ignorance and assumes that no gentleman will take advantage of him.

A Gentleman respects the reserves of others, but demands that others respect those which are his.

A Gentleman can become what he wills to be. . ."

I do not know whether the men of VMI lived by this Code; perhaps not. But it is powerfully impressive that a public institution of higher education still in existence sought to have them do so. I do not think any of us, women included, will be better off for its destruction.

chickelit said...

Save the males

Earnest Prole said...

Are you teaching your sons to be gentlemen (with or without the use of that word)?

I taught them to grab beautiful chicks by the pussy.

NorthOfTheOneOhOne said...

rhhardin said...

Rules about treating women are a minor part of gentleman.

One of the prime motivators that makes men act like gentlemen is that no lady would have anything to do with a man who is not a gentleman. But now that women see no need to behave like ladies we have a dearth of gentlemen. This infuriates women to no end. Funny that.

Fernandinande said...

Or is it a Pet Sematary?

Perhaps Pet Seminary.

Dude1394 said...

If it’s cheaper to for it.

Narr said...

That VMI code is priggish, cubed. And I say that as someone who was taught to act like a gentleman by some very old-school ladies of various backgrounds and colors.

Our "tweeny" black dackel is the best natured dog I've ever owned, I guess partly because his testicles were removed at an early stage; the other two red dackels I've had were bigger and feistier than he is, but they also roamed free in those golden American decades long past, and led much more interesting (if shorter) doggy lives.

Narr
I taught my own son as best I could; after that one time he never humped a visitor's leg again

Narr said...

Heinie, Waldi, and Murphy. We also had Bloomer from 1996 to 2010, a Christmas gift for aforementioned son. She was a big basset (s) and jack russell (d) mix who had a beautiful white double coat with a couple of big black spots, rather like a Holstein.

We had her fixed early on of course. She turned out to be stupid, crazy, and evil.

But we loved her.

Narr
She's lucky we didn't eat her

Rory said...

"Rules about treating your own mother is THE major rule of gentleman....3. No lying."

Yeah, no.

J. Farmer said...

Speaking of pet cemeteries, check out the Errol Morris documentary Gates of Heaven if you haven't already seen it.

AndrewV said...

"'It was so important for some people that they stay together that they decided to be interred in a pet cemetery.'"

I'm sure Steven King warned us about how that might turn out.

Andrew said...

wHO SAYS YOU CAN'T BURY YOUR PET IN A HUMAN CEMETERY? WELL IN SOME STATES IT'S THE LAW, BUT ANYTHING CAN BE DONE IF YOU KNOW THE RIGHT MORTICIAN. LOTS OF DOGS AND CATS BURIED WITH MY RELATIVES.