Meanwhile in Australia. pic.twitter.com/RBAFFe09Vm
— John. (@JohnFloreani) September 16, 2020
September 17, 2020
Trying to get some work done...
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Meanwhile in Australia. pic.twitter.com/RBAFFe09Vm
— John. (@JohnFloreani) September 16, 2020
49 comments:
Puts the ticks and mosquitoes I battle while gardening into perspective.
Not everything tries to kill you here, some are happy with maiming.
Just another day here in SE N.C.
Got a treat?
Everything in Australia wants to kill you or kill and eat you.
Real men.
Aussies. They are an entirely different breed. Very independent people. So it's very weird when you read how the Left/Woke clones are taking over life down under as well.
He can always hit the croc with the selfie stick, but I don't think it can hold its jaws open as in cartoons.
I would have shit myself.
I hope crocs are not interested in eating shit.
That must have been very confusing for the alligator. They can't sit.
Or is that a crocodile? I hear they do sit, but we don't have them in the Americas. Or was that alligators we don't have?
Dumbest. Croc. Ever.
And that's saying something.
I suspect an elaborate hoax.
Yeah, if I saw that coming up behind me while I stood in the water, I would shit my pants immediately.
Australia gets a bad rap. It has lots of poisonous animals such as snakes, jellyfish, spiders, platypus. But several time more Australians die annually from falling off horses (30-40)than die from poisonous animals about 5 or fewer.
John Henry
you call that a knife? that's not a knife; THIS is a knife
But remember: teachers have the hardest jobs!
At one of the Aussie star parties I go to, my hosts got their 4-wheel drive vehicles deeply stuck in the mud while off-roading. Took two days and a lot of work and ingenuity to get them out. I'd have been bummed, but they had a blast. It was an adventure.
There were days at the office I described as being up to my ass in alligators. At least I never said "literally."
Soon to have nickname Capt'n Hook
So it's very weird when you read how the Left/Woke clones are taking over life down under as well.
I think it's mostly Victoria, which has the capital where the politicians live.
"I suspect an elaborate hoax.”
Yeah. A croc raised from an egg by humans, most likely. Some viewers of this video will probably show up as Darwin award nominees in coming years.
Mad props from Florida. Never panic.
When in Florida I consider any pool of water as dangerous.
In Australia I'd be wary of even a kid's three-foot diameter pool with 2" of crystal-clear water in it.
I guess you can get used to anything.
I mean, people working in the WH got used to Hillary...
That’s a pretty small croc by the standards of the species. No wonder the guy is so blasé about it.
Or is that a crocodile? I hear they do sit, but we don't have them in the Americas. Or was that alligators we don't have?
We have both, but have more alligators.
That would make a nice pairing with a .45!!
That's not a wild croc, he's probably from a croc farm and he's looking for a handout.
a crocodile? we don't have them in the Americas. Or was that alligators we don't have?
we're privileged to have both
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_crocodile
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_alligator
Stay! Good boy! Now he needs to give the crocodile a treat, preferably not a part of himself...
"Australia gets a bad rap. It has lots of poisonous animals such as snakes, jellyfish, spiders, platypus. But several time more Australians die annually from falling off horses (30-40)than die from poisonous animals about 5 or fewer."
IDK, I have a good Aussie friend who almost died from a snake bite. I treat it with a lot of respect when I go there. Especially since I go there to stargaze (all night, in the dark, out in the bush). It's one reason I like New Zealand better. Nothing to kill you.
I give you now Professor Twist,
A conscientious scientist,
Trustees exclaimed, "He never bungles!"
And sent him off to distant jungles.
Camped on a tropic riverside,
One day he missed his loving bride.
She had, the guide informed him later,
Been eaten by an alligator.
Professor Twist could not but smile.
"You mean," he said, "a crocodile."
Dear Hardin Family,
My name is Latanya, and right now it is still not advisable to speak with you in person, but out of concern for you and your family's spiritual and physical health, I am contacting you by letter...
Hand-addressed and stamped letter from Jehovah's Witnesses
You have to let ‘em know who’s boss.
That might be a better metaphor for trolls than hippos.
But several times more Australians die annually from falling off horses (30-40)than die from poisonous animals about 5 or fewer.
However, many more Australians are hospitalized for envenomations than for riding accidents. Australia has the most advanced and productive antivenin pharmacological industries in the world because they're needed. All of the five most venomous snakes are native to the continent. Fortunately, two of the five are sea snakes and are remarkably reluctant to bite human swimmers. Unfortunately, one of the five, the Eastern Brown Snake (Pseudonaja textiles -- "false cobra" -- considering the venom potency, the cobra should be called "false brown") is common throughout the eastern half of Australia and often invades suburban homes and gardens in search of rats and mice. The Eastern Brown is not reluctant to bite, nor is it kind enough to give fair warning. Our Eastern Diamondback is quite gentlemanly by comparison.
Then there are Australian spiders -- there are over forty funnel-web species (Atrox) in Oz, all are dangerously venomous, but the Sydney funnel-web is both deadly and aggressive. Next up is the Redback (Latrodectus hasselti, our Black Widow is Latrodectus mactans.) There are several other native down under spiders with medically significant bites. Thanks to tourism our own Brown Recluse (Loxosceles reclusa) has adopted a new home. In terms of deadly biters, Aussies can't catch a break.
In addition to snakes and spiders, the outback has other venomous surprises -- varanid lizards, about a dozen species, and the Platypus (males only).
Aussies are even more addicted to the beach lifestyle than we are, and as a reward fate has given them aquatic companions like the Great White, the Box Jellyfish, and the Textile Cone. Nasty.
Soon to be known as 'Lefty'?
"That's not a knife..."
https://youtu.be/W09ghiWskUk
Bonecruncher
It has some dental issues.
Aussies are interesting people. We have a lot in common with them, but they do have a different perspective regarding work. As one Aussie told me, “You Americans live to work. We work to live.”
Uhhh...wait til the aussie mask snottzies see this. I bet those "real men" will get to runnin then!
In South Florida, recently "introduced" non-native Nile crocodiles may soon be eating the alligators of Alligator Alley, which seems kind of presumptuous.
Gary Larson, call your office.
Quaestor: I had to look up "Textile Cone". Yowza.
Mike,
Snakes kill so few people that Wikipedia has a list of all fatalities going back to 1900
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fatal_snake_bites_in_Australia
53 people total from 1979 to 1998 or about 2 per year.
The key phrase in your friend's case is "almost" died.
Most bites don't cause death and there aren't even many bites.
"The estimated incidence of snakebites annually in Australia is between 3 and 18 per 100,000"
For comparison, the US has 5 fatal snakebites per year but we also have about 11 times the population. snakebite
John Henry
Nope
Douglas Adams' View of Australia
http://www.focb.co.nz/humor/DougAdamsOnOz.html
They aren't on the banks of the great, grey-green, greasy Limpopo River, all set about with fever trees, but they have a crocodile, in case someone's nose needs lengthening.
Freshie--a freshwater croc--much less danderous than the saltwater crocs. Freshies don't eat people.
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