August 13, 2019

The "Who's on first?" of dog names.

"While extremely high I decided that the greatest dog name ever thought of is Askim, because when people ask me his name and I tell them about 50% of the time they’ll awkwardly bend down and ask my dog it’s [sic] name. It’s hilarious...." That is from the amusing subreddit Am I the Asshole?

Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

83 comments:

J. Farmer said...

Am I the asshole?

Usually, yes.

traditionalguy said...

Wit is a many splendored thing.

alanc709 said...

Well, it's very funny when he's extremely high.... but he probably finds Elizabeth Warren extremely funny then, also, I bet.

Fernandistein said...

That's not a joke.

Seeing Red said...

I heard of a family that named their dog Lucy so they could say, “Lucy! I’m home!”

traditionalguy said...

Word games are playable on strangers. But sometimes it makes a bad first impression. You could say it's not Presidential, or is it.

Kevin said...

I'll bet the dog tires of it before anyone else.

AAT said...

My favorite PGA golfer: Seung-yul Noh

"Who won today?"
"Soon you’ll know."
"But I wanna know now!!!"

RMc said...

Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

Well, Dems keep running for president, so...

NCMoss said...

Diogi (Dee-Oh-Gee) is a good name.

richlb said...

We let our kids name our dog. And we ended up with "Deogi". Like D-O-G. Get it?! The newest dog we named ourselves.

henry said...

People that don't like my joke need to get over themselves.

EDH said...

"While extremely high I decided that the greatest dog name ever thought of is Askim..."

How about "Toke" the dog? I never realized how rooted in economic theory this "tragedy of the commune" routine by Cheech & Chong was.

Strawberry Revival.

Hey, man, Toke can go anywhere in the house if he wants...

I know, man, that's the trouble with that dog, man, he goes everywhere in the house, man.

J. Farmer said...

Blogger NCMoss said...
Diogi (Dee-Oh-Gee) is a good name.

8/13/19, 8:41 AM

Blogger richlb said...
We let our kids name our dog. And we ended up with "Deogi". Like D-O-G. Get it?! The newest dog we named ourselves.

8/13/19, 8:43 AM


Interesting bit of synchronicity.

traditionalguy said...

In honor of CNN's twisted moderators, we should call our dogs Fredo.

traditionalguy said...

Dow up 400+ points. That blows up the twisted Media's strongest predictions of a crash.

Dave Begley said...

I'm sure some parents will now name their kids "askhim" or "askher."

I used to share office space with a lawyer who's kids had names that were more appropriate for a dog.

Michael K said...

You could name your dog Shark but don't take him to the beach.

AAT said...

This guy is of the school of thought that anybody who takes him at his word deserves mockery.

Hagar said...

Askim also is a small town SSE of Oslo.

Nonapod said...

First off, it's a pretty lame joke. One of those eye-rollingly annoying things that prompts a deadpan response like "Oh, that's so funny. You're so funny".

It's something that's fine among friends. They know there's no mean spiritedness behind it. But obviously it got him into trouble with a complete stranger. Maybe the dog park people are being a bit uptight too, but that's their prerogative. They don't know you. They don't have any bases to assume that you're not just making fun of a sweet old lady.

gilbar said...

After doing some quick independent research on subreddit Am I the Asshole (i read 4 of them)
I think the pro tip is: If you post to subreddit Am I the Asshole... You ARE

Rory said...

My dog and I know a Dioji.

"Askim" makes presumptions about the dog's future preferences.

Francisco D said...

Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

Is that a question about our commenting habits here?

Ann Althouse said...

"After doing some quick independent research on subreddit Am I the Asshole (i read 4 of them)
I think the pro tip is: If you post to subreddit Am I the Asshole... You ARE"

No. Very often the person has a problem where they are able to get support that they are NTA. Some people are in relationships with assholes who are good at arguing that the other person is the problem. It's a forum for airing out such problems. I've read lots of great stuff over there. Interesting problems, and good responses from intelligent commenters.

(I love Reddit.)

mikee said...

In college, living in a dorm, I set up a terrarium with river pebbles and plants in a 10 gallon aquarium. When asked what it was, I explained to my friends that I was raising salamanders. I don't know why I did that. just college nerd idiocy, I guess.

For the rest of the semester visitors to our room would gaze intently at the terrarium.
About half could see salamanders "peeking out from under the rocks."
Or at least they were humoring my dementia about amphibians.

FullMoon said...

Have not read that particular subreddit.
I give a lot of credit to the writers asking for advice on other subreddits. Theey are great at making up ridiculous scenarios and eliciting heartfelt and emotional responses from innocents..

Pretty funny sometimes

Hammond X. Gritzkofe said...

What are Askim's pronouns?

Char Char Binks said...

Continuing when people don't like it the best part of a joke.

gilbar said...

Our Beloved Professor Althouse takes me to task, saying...
No. Very often the person has a problem where they are able to get support that they are NTA. Some people are in relationships with assholes

I wasn't trying to say that they were The Only Asshole; just that if you break up both your parents marriages, that there is a word to describe you

If, on the other hand, you have an affair and get pregnant; then have your parents adopt your child, you are Also an Asshole: Presumably one that would have found a different course of action if you'd just talked to Planned Parenthood

Nonapod said...

Another Pro-Tip might be: Any idea that was incepted when you're high is %99.9 likely to be idiotic and puerile.

Bill, Republic of Texas said...

Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

It's even more fun then!

J. Farmer said...

@Nonapod:

Another Pro-Tip might be: Any idea that was incepted when you're high is %99.9 likely to be idiotic and puerile

I know that’s the popular conception, but is it really true? In my experience, stupid people say stupid things when they’re high, and smart people often say smart things.

Howard said...

The Asshole is always in the eye of the beholder this proving that I am NTA

stevew said...

Steven Wright says: I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. He's an East German Shepherd.

I do the hearing joke whenever the opportunity presents itself. Someone, often my wife, will say they can't hear something or their ears are bothering them, and I respond with, "what?". Based on the looks I get I am definitely not NTA.

J. Farmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
J. Farmer said...

My dog’s name is Hank. After Hank Williams. No pun intended or achieved.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

I like the posts on that sub...AITA, where everyone says YES you are the asshole, but we approve of your actions.

Justified Asshole!!!.

FullMoon said...

ORIGINAL REDDIT POST:
"So my sister is 22 and has never been in a relationship. I'll be honest she's unattractive overweight and has no personality whatsoever. Despite all that she has a huge ego. She whines about being unable to find a relationship even tought there were men interested but she rejected them because her standards are too high she expects someone that will take care of their looks (she doesn't) someone who will focus on her and her only. Yesterday I snapped in the middle of her rant about how all men are the same and said to her that she isn't a great catch and should either take care of herself more and better herself or lower her standards because everyone around her is tired of her bitching, she stayed quiet and we didn't talk since.

Edit : Some of my familiy members did try to explain the same thing to her a few times in a nicer manner but she always rolled her eyes and continued with the same "men aren't shit"

Also I didn't just assume she wants attractive buff men she stated it quite a few times saying that men have no reason to be fat unattractive and lazy

I'm a female just for the INFO


Response:WeaselBit 21 points 20 hours ago

Accurately describes every dude I dated back before my transition (when I lived as a woman) and pretty much all the guys I've dated since then. Not great on the physical attractiveness scale, often overweight. But some of the nicest, funniest, insightful, and intelligent people I've known.

I have a physical type, and it's not 'big', but personality, interests, and emotional support will trump a buff guy any day of the week.



Definitely genuine

rcocean said...

We call our dog Hitler, because she's a German Shepard and she always wants to invade Poland.

Yancey Ward said...

If you are in a situation and really don't know who the asshole is, then it is likely your name should be Fredo.

m stone said...

Name your child "Doctor." Fits either gender, garners respect as an adult, and spares you the cost of medical training.

m

Nonapod said...

I know that’s the popular conception, but is it really true? In my experience, stupid people say stupid things when they’re high, and smart people often say smart things.

I allowed that .1%. It's certainly true that if if this guy got stoned he'd say some smart things. But would he reach new insights?

I've heard it argued that certain alternate state experiences, like for example ayahuasca, can offer new approaches to problems with new perspectives, lateral thinking ect.

J. Farmer said...

@Nonapod:

I allowed that .1%.

I get it. I just think it’s a gross understatement. I’ve smoked weed with a lot of educated and high performing individuals. And I’ve never heard any of them say anything that was “Idiotic” or “puerile.” Now being drunk is a totally different story. But of course it’s an irony of the world that the most destructive drug is also the one that is most readily available.

J. Farmer said...

M stone:

Name your child "Doctor." Fits either gender, garners respect as an adult, and spares you the cost of medical training.

I read the first sentence as asking someone to identify their childhood doctor and then spent the next couple of minutes trying to figure out what the hell the second sentence had to do with the first.

AAT said...

"she stated it quite a few times saying that MEN have no reason to be fat unattractive and lazy”

But she’s got a million reasons! Good ones!

AAT said...

Here’s a rule many could find helpful. If you keep running into assholes all day long, day in, day out, You are the asshole. If you run into one only occasionally, it’s probably them.

PM said...

Very strong dog-naming from SNL with its Lassie TV opening: "Man-son!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5IrRe2F7qY

Char Char Binks said...

Name your child, or dog, Garner, any gender, just to needle Althouse.

Char Char Binks said...

Then teach it to fetch.

John Ray said...

Mark Twain wrote often of his three dogs named: I Know; You Know; and Don't Know.

He wrote once that going to heaven at death was a matter of preference, because if there was merit, a dog would go to heaven instead (paraphrasing).

His last dog, at the time of his death, was named Burns.

Freeman Hunt said...

That's hilarious.

Skippy Tisdale said...

One day, a policeman spotted a young girl walking her dog in the park, so the policeman walked up to the girl and asked, What’s your name?”
The girl replied, “Petal.”

The policeman said, “My, what a unusual name! And how did you come to be named Petal?
“Well, on the day I was born all of the hills were covered in beautiful flowers. And my mother saw that the flowers were beautiful and I was beautiful just like the petals and everything was beautiful, so she named me Petal.”

“That’s a beautiful story! It’s such a perfect name for such a beautiful girl! And your little doggie, what’s his name?”

“Why, his name is Porky.”

“Well that’s an unusual name too. How did you come to name him Porky?”

Petal replied, “He fucks pigs.”

John Ray said...

Skippy: I wasn't ready for that one. Now, I need a new keyboard.

Fanboy said...

فروع ويسترن يونيون

Skippy Tisdale said...

Jon Ray,

It was told to me over 40 years ago at Woodward Camp by an Olympic gymnastics coach from Great Britain. Hearing it with a British accent akin to John Cleese's makes it exponentially funnier.

RonF said...

This thread is useless without a link to Denis Leary's classic:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrgpZ0fUixs

Roy Jacobsen said...

J. Farmer said...

I’ve smoked weed with a lot of educated and high performing individuals. And I’ve never heard any of them say anything that was “Idiotic” or “puerile.” Now being drunk is a totally different story. But of course it’s an irony of the world that the most destructive drug is also the one that is most readily available.


Having no experience with smoking weed, I am genuinely curious: Is there any chance that the fact that you were smoking weed could have colored your judgment as to whether the thing said were idiotic or puerile?

Marc said...

My landlady named her new dog Diogi (or however she spells it) and I've only this morning gotten the joke. Had a good laugh at my denseness and at the same time have been confirmed in one or two of my judgments about her.

Narr said...

RJ@125: I'll field until J Farmer gets back. I've smoked weed with all kinds--high(!) performers and low, smart and dull, idiotic, puerile, and a few genuine FITHs.

Besides being fun almost every time (I was paranoid passing a big J around the circle in the visiting yard of the penal farm, after my youngest brother had smuggled some reefer in for our older bro) the conversations have ranged from the most profound and stimulating I've ever had to the most pointless.

Often, the pot was accompanied and sometimes drowned out by the booze; I'd say of the two, cannabis is far more benign for the individual and community than al-kuhul.

Narr
YMMV


Narr said...

Quat.

Narr
Come, Quat!

Nonapod said...

J. Farmer said...

I’ve smoked weed with a lot of educated and high performing individuals. And I’ve never heard any of them say anything that was “Idiotic” or “puerile.


Full disclure, I haven't smoked weed in well over a decade. And in fairness the people I smoked would rarely say anything that I would describe as idiotic or puerile either that I can remember. But it didn't seem like an elevated form of conversation either. I've personally never experienced what I would describe as great insights while stoned. Perhaps it's just my perceptions, but I think smoking marijuana is an overrated experience. I've heard that edibles offer a different sort of experience.

walter said...

Fido, Fredo, Placido..

fleg9bo said...

I named my dog Spur so when I walk him I get to say, "Heel, spur."

walter said...

"I've heard that edibles offer a different sort of experience."
Yep. Including potential for psychotic breaks!

Leland said...

Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

Works for SNL.

Paul Zrimsek said...

they’ll awkwardly bend down and ask my dog it’s [sic] name. It’s hilarious....

WTF? You just got done telling us it's Askim.

Pianoman said...

According to Red Peters, the greatest dog name of all time is Stains.

Yes, I'm 11 years old as I type that.

J. Farmer said...

@Nonapod:

But it didn't seem like an elevated form of conversation either. I've personally never experienced what I would describe as great insights while stoned. Perhaps it's just my perceptions, but I think smoking marijuana is an overrated experience.

It is not for everyone, but I've certainly had insights and increased creativity while under the influence and have had great conversations, as well. Again, I think it depends more on the smoker than the smoke. The stoner stereotype is more a riff on the SoCal surfer dude archetype than it is on the average cannabis users. It's a bit like saying a wino is the typical user of alcohol.

I've heard that edibles offer a different sort of experience.

Most of the problems I've heard about people having with edibles are from inexperienced smokers who consume way more than they should. If you take a hit off a bowl and are at a nice level, you simply stop smoking. Not so easy with an edible.

Phidippus said...

Dave Begley said: "I'm sure some parents will now name their kids "askhim" or "askher."

So wrong. Shouldn't they have named the child "Askxe" or "Ashxer"?

Phidippus said...

Bill, from the Last Free State said:

"Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?

It's even more fun then!"

Hell yeah. I've been doing it my whole life. The looks I got from my teenage daughter more than compensated for the blanks stares I got from my wife.

OK, I get my fun where I can. Examples:

Teenage Daughter: "I'm so tired." Dad: "How can you be tired, when you haven't done anything?"

Teenage Daughter (after Dad burps or farts): "Say 'Excuse me'!" Dad: "Excuse you."

Believe it not, it took years for her to give up after the first time, after the last one.

Fritz said...

Our first dog we got as a puppy; she was half shepherd and half husky, and we named her Sybil. Our second two dogs were adopted huskies. Both had the name Skye when we adopted them, and the second is nearly identical to the first. Some people seem to think we have the longest living dog ever.

madAsHell said...

I've heard that edibles offer a different sort of experience.

It's a great way to over-dose, and it's not fun.

Howard said...

The Deep State wants you people to fear, hate, ridicule cannabis because they no it makes you a subversive.

Narr said...

Here's one sure to embarrass mature people of all ages, but my son and I love it:

"There's a job opening down at the bus barn!"

-"Doing what?"

"Sucking farts out of seat cushions."

Narr
Oldies but goodies

todd galle said...

I've always name my dogs after the WWII British cruiser nomenclature. Ajax, Achilles, Agamemnon, etc. Then my daughter got a dog, Kipper. God save me.

todd galle said...

If I remember right, my second Golden Retriever papered with the ACS as 'Ajax Evelyn Wood Galle' or some such. My favorite Victorian General...Evelyn Wood (I think he actually was elevated to Field Marshal). The most injured officer ever, often due to his own indiscretion. Served through the Boer War. Stomped through the face by a giraffe because he took a wager that he couldn't ride it. Kind of a wash there, he did for a bit, but the giraffe had the better, stomping on his face after tossing him off. He did get a VC if I'm not mistaken. Boer War, I think, maybe Zulu? Am now into Early Modern England, so am not current on Victorian stuff.

SGT Ted said...

"Once you know people don't like your joke, is it okay to keep having your fun?"

Sometimes, that's part of the fun.

todd galle said...

Of course, you have to have the fortitude to say, 'OK, line up the giraffe by the horse block, I'll hop on' and who's your bank in case I live.....

Tina Trent said...

Pet names are less dishonest than city slogans.

"It's Terrific in Tifton" has lured nobody from HW 75. Ever.

Bill, Republic of Texas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
RobinGoodfellow said...

Askim as a dog name reminds me of this apocryphal story.

Guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks, “What’s your wifi password?”

Bartender responds, “You have to order something.”

Guy says, “I’ll have a Coke. What’s the password?”

Bartender responds, “‘You have to order something’, all lower case, no spaces.”

Joy said...

Hi,
Amazing Post keeps sharing
Dog Names