July 30, 2019

"I really like trying to re-create bad haircuts I gave myself when I was like 6. I think there’s something powerful about re-creating looking in the mirror..."

"... and going, Oh shit, this was a horrible idea. I shouldn’t have done this with these scissors. A lot of my inspiration comes from people cutting their own hair and kids cutting their own hair, for sure.... With a step, you lose all the hair around your face — you lose any opportunity to hide, which is cool. I think bangs are there to kind of hide behind a bit. But with a step, there’s no hiding; you have to have your face out in the open.... When you hit the lobes, there’s something about it that feels medieval and kind of pre-Raphaelite; it’s something you can recognize. The second you take it past that, it completely fucks with the golden ratio in your head. You start going, Why is it doing this? It’s not supposed to look like that, which I also like doing to people, I’m not gonna lie."

Said the hairdresser Dylan Chavles, quoted in "Can You Handle These Bangs?" (NY Magazine). This hairstyle is crazy, but it may hoodwink kids too young to think "mullet." Chavles even says, "Youʼll have two bobs — a little ’20s bob up here and a regular bob in the back," which is sounds a lot like "Business up front, party in the back," the classic description of a mullet. And yet "’20s bob" sounds like the party and "regular bob" sounds like business, so it's actually more party up front, business in the back, but that doesn't make it any more aesthetically pleasing. Here's Chavles’s own proud promotion of his work:



A post shared by Dylan Chavles (@dylanchavles) on

44 comments:

chuck said...

The picture looks "off" to me.

Darrell said...

Soy Boy, Soy Girl, or Soy Non-Binary?

Why bother analyzing?

Ann Althouse said...

Althouse blog trivia: I blogged about bangs on my first day of blogging, January 14, 2004.

Bangs are a big topic with me. If you click on my "bangs" tag, you'll find the old post where I confess: "I myself got caught up in The Great Secular Hair Panic of 1964 when teachers sent me to the school vice principal's office more than once because of the length of my bangs. (Let's just say The Ramones stole my hairstyle.) I challenged the authorities to justify their zealotry to override my style autonomy, and they spluttered and resorted to bogus health claims."

Fernandinande said...

"I've never had an awkward phase"

Freeman Hunt said...

If you kept going through the back with the short bob, it would look pretty great and less it's-1982-and-your-aunt-cuts-your-hair. That said, I don't hate it. It's very chill.

Fernandinande said...

I always thought it was a strange word for a hair-do:

bangs (n.)
"hair cut straight across so as to form a fringe over the forehead," 1878 (in singular, bang), American English, attested from 1832 of horses (bang-tail), perhaps from notion of abruptness (as in bang off "immediately, without delay," though this expression is attested only from 1886).

Darrell said...

Bangs used to be cut on the sharp side edge of the anvil with a hammer. At least for the horse's tail.

Ralph L said...

My eyes went from "hoodwink" to "boobs."

Wouldn't a breeze blow the hair into your eyes?

Fernandinande said...

Apart from the skin surface, hair represents a significant tissue component with a capacity of bacterial interactions. New information can be obtained about hair function through the characterization of bacterial adherence, colonization, and responses to hair shafts per se. In this proof-of-principle study, we examine the growth kinetics of Gram-positive Staphylococcus aureus and Staphylococcus epidermidis, and Gram-negative Pseudomonas aeruginosa and Escherichia coli in the presence of human hair shafts. We explore the ability of these bacteria to adhere to and colonize the foreheads and eyeballs of 11 to 14 year-old girls whose bangs are too long, as well as the resulting impact on the hair’s surface morphology.

Ann Althouse said...

"If you kept going through the back with the short bob, it would look pretty great and less it's-1982-and-your-aunt-cuts-your-hair. That said, I don't hate it. It's very chill."

As someone who's had bangs and grown out backs quite a few times, to me, it screams "I'm trying to grow out my bangs!!!" That's the horrible awkward stage. The notion that anyone would cut them like that on purpose... I can't believe it... other than as a joke while you're about to cut bangs and you want something so bad it's a way to taunt people before you get the real haircut. I mean, why not, if you're ever going from long hair to short hair, just get a ridiculous mullet and wear it around for a week as a joke? Cut it yourself, even, and then go in for a proper haircut. Like when men shave off beards and shave some ridiculous facial hair pattern before shaving it all off.

Seeing Red said...

It looks like a 70s haircut.

It’ll fit right in.

Darrell said...

I can't even stand to look at people that have hair below their eyebrows. Good luck getting a job. Hollywood keep pushing this crap.

etbass said...

Gonna pass on this topic.

Michael K said...

Our middle daughter, whose baby is due today, walked in the house several years ago with a crew cut. She is a beautiful woman and it looked awful. I quipped, "I thought you were in remission?" Her mother will not let me forget that. She brings it up as an example of my foot-in-mouth tendency,

Fernandinande said...

Hairdos Monthly
TEENAGERS: Why do they comb all their hair towards their faces?

Note: question is not answered.

Laslo Spatula said...

So, boiling down two of today's posts:

Women under the age of sixteen should not have sex.

Women above the age of sixteen should not cut their own hair.

I am Laslo.

tim in vermont said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ralph L said...

What's written on her shirt? Circle Jerk with a backwards E?

Laslo Spatula said...

Circle Jerks. Punk band from years ago. Hipster-signalling.

I am Laslo.

Narr said...

Wow, trashbacks to the 70s!

Most of us looked like that (or worse) for most of the 70s. I was the first one of my group to tire of hair games and went short--straight-back pompadour--years before most guys did.

Funny story, at a small movie-house to see the Vietnam documentary "Hearts and Minds"(?) with a friend who had been at MAC-V; friend had long hair and I was newly shorn, and there was a hippie handing out antiwar lit in the lobby--who studiously avoided facing or noticing me.

Narr
Freak-flag furled

Ralph L said...

Punk band from years ago. Hipster-signalling.

It's funny that hipsters wear so much black, yet the black Tee shirt crowd of my youth was totally different.

Freeman Hunt said...

"Our middle daughter, whose baby is due today, walked in the house several years ago with a crew cut. She is a beautiful woman and it looked awful. I quipped, "I thought you were in remission?""

Maybe it was helpful. I got a short haircut in fourth grade, and a blunt kid in my class said, "Did a lawnmower run over your hair?" Still serves as a helpful reminder never to go too short.

Freeman Hunt said...

I figured out what I find the likable aspect of this haircut to be. Reminds me of paintings of knights with their helmets off. They could call it the Lancelot. (#teamgalahad btw as far as the stories go. Lancelot better suited to hairstyle name.)

mockturtle said...

It's odd that so many older women [women my age] have their hair cut very short. It demands far more frequent haircuts and they so often look just like their husbands, from behind, at least. While I still adopt my ponytail-through-the-back-of-my-baseball-cap style for everyday, my hair is just short of shoulder length and looks nice outside of the cap, as well. And I don't look like a guy.

mockturtle said...

What's written on her shirt? Circle Jerk with a backwards E?

Is it really a 'her'? How can you tell? No boobs. But also looks like xe is wearing lipstick.

Roughcoat said...

If she had the face and body of Kate Upton, her hair would not be an issue.

Roughcoat said...

mockturtle @1:38:

How about when mature black women shave their heads, or nearly so? Very unattractive. It signals they've given up.

tim in vermont said...

" Very unattractive. It signals they've given up.”

They have cute wigs they wear when they want to, which is why they say “Don’t you know you never touch a sister’s hair!"

tim in vermont said...

I think. she’s cute. When I was her age, I definitely would have noticed her.

tim in vermont said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rehajm said...

People are starting to push the boundaries of what beauty is

Non-conformists all look alike.

Narr said...

IMHO few women (Zooey Deschanel for onestance) look good in bangs.

Short hair looks good on some women. My wife's hair-like substance is suitable for short and little else anyway, and I like it.

Narr
You can only torture hair so much

Rabel said...

"...proud promotion of his work..."

Her work.

Freeman Hunt said...

"People are starting to push the boundaries of what beauty is."

Are the boundaries of beauty pushable or is the pushing actually standing outside with delusions?

Calypso Facto said...

"I really like trying to re-create bad haircuts I gave myself when I was like 6. I think there’s something powerful about re-creating looking in the mirror ... and going, Oh shit, this was a horrible idea. I shouldn’t have done this with these scissors."

I was SO sure this was going to turn out to be a Boris Johnson quote.

mockturtle said...

Are the boundaries of beauty pushable or is the pushing actually standing outside with delusions?

Freeman asks wisely. She is one who will never be fooled by a naked emperor.

The Minnow Wrangler said...

This looks nothing like my kids cutting their own hair. They would be scalped to a certain point with long stringy pieces hanging down. Usually right before a holiday or family picture.

tcrosse said...

I was SO sure this was going to turn out to be a Boris Johnson quote.

Young Boris rocks those bangs.

stevew said...

sigh, if only i still had enough hair on my head to make a bad haircut of...

cubanbob said...

stevew said...
sigh, if only i still had enough hair on my head to make a bad haircut of...

Amen. Well said brother. What's worse is hair growing everywhere except on one's head.

Rich Rostrom said...

"a little ’20s bob..."? As in "the 1920s"? As in "Bernice Bobs Her Hair"?

I am surprised that such a youngster would have such awareness of grooming history. It's fairly cool.

Narr said...

Rich Rostrom! Buddy! Long time no see.

Narr
We refought WWII together

Can Of Cheese for Hunter said...

Bernie wants to spread the mizzery.

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...

"I can't even stand to look at people that have hair below their eyebrows. Good luck getting a job. Hollywood keep pushing this crap."

Word. I want to shave Sissy Spacek's head.