May 21, 2019

Raccoons of Instagram.



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bank card (old comic)

A post shared by Poorly Drawn Lines (@poorlydrawnlines) on

67 comments:

Mike Sylwester said...

I write a blog about opossums.

Yancey Ward said...

Maybe Althouse can start drawing raccoons.

tim maguire said...

My neighbourhood used to be infested with raccoons. I hated them and was annoyed that they were protected so there was nothing we could do about it. Then the city came up with new garbage cans that the raccoons couldn't get into. Apparently starving them to death is more humane than catching them and releasing them in the woods far away. Anyway, it worked. We have far fewer raccoons now.

Apparently the raccoons helped control the squirrel population because now we're overrun with squirrels. Which is worse. I prefer the raccoons.

traditionalguy said...

Pogo met the enemy.

Big Mike said...

“poorlydrawnlines” is well-named.

J Oliver said...

I had to magnify the raccoon picture to see if those reflections in the eye were garbage cans.

gilbar said...

so, a question about raccoons;
Is this girl crazy? Or, is she just pretending to be crazy; kinda like a raccoon pretends to be asleep?
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/ocasio-cortez-growing-cauliflower-colonial

Karen of Texas said...

Beware the raccoon feces. Baylisascaris procyonis egges aren't something you want to introduce to your digestive track. They tend to hatch and migrate to other areas - like your brain. Or your eyes.

Beware the raccoon pee. You don't want to test your immune system/kidneys with leptospirosis. Lost my heart dog to that.

Karen of Texas said...

*eggs

rcocean said...

raccoon aren't the lovable masked bandits they're made out to be. They'll kill a cat and take on a dog, if given a chance. Fortunately, in my neck of the woods, you rarely see them except at night. Mostly, I just see the tracks with the knocked over garbage can.

madAsHell said...

That looks like a raccoon. Aren't raccoons in Cozumel called coatimundi, and in the same family procyonidae with raccoons?

Asking for a friend.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

" I had to fight a raccoon for this."

further south, the raccoons have to fight the Venezuelans

rehajm said...

Trash pandas. Theres a family what prowls the yard at night. They get caught on the video camera quite often. I don’t mind them as they haven’t made a nuisance of themselves. The big one you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley- he stood on two legs against a tree on camera. He was almost four feet tall...

Dave Begley said...

Madison should have a giant badger on a wall like that.

wholelottasplainin' said...

Wife was out back one late fall evening with her friends, sitting around a glowing firepit.

Suddenly, on the wooden fence fence behind them, appeared six raccoons. A family, apparently.

Sitting quietly, their staring eyes reflected the firepit's glow.

Very spooky.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Watching "In the Electric Mist" with ol' Tommy Lee Jones.

I had not liked him, but this is a good role.

I think the Coen's probably saw it and determined he should star in No Country for Old Men.

Little girl has a pet raccoon she cuddles like a kitten.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

@Guidocannonballs

how did the cherry work out?

Smokin' (one of our faves)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MO0l36nEvCc

BUMBLE BEE said...

As you've indicated, God made plenty of 'em. .22 short is the solution

wildswan said...

I had a part-Samoyed dog who used to kill raccoons. He had a big ruff around his neck and when he charged the raccoons they would leap for his throat but only bite into hair. Then he'd swing his head and with a sudden shake break the raccoon's neck. It was incredible how many raccoons were in that neighborhood, living in the ivy on chimneys. No trash can deterred them. If you tied the lid on with bungee cords they would knock the can over and then bounce it till the cords sprang off. You'd hear them out there, working away on opening the cans; and then they'd spread garbage around the yard as they looked for tasty bits. No one did anything because raccoons have a bite that can go through wood and, sometimes, rabies. However soon after I arrived with my dog, the raccoon population fell to zero for blocks around the house. Of course, this was years ago but I rather think my dog would be just as popular now as he was back then.

Freeman Hunt said...

Last year we had an incredible number of birds and squirrels. This year we have hawks and owls.

Also raccoons, but I only know about them because they show up on the wildlife camera. They're not into trash.

Birkel said...

Put a 20 pound brick on top of the cans. The raccoons look for targets of opportunity. Deny them opportunities.

iowan2 said...

Raccoon stories. OK,

30 years ago, Lake of the Ozarks. Four of us couples rented a houseboat for the week. Just an endorsement, that is the most relaxing vacation we have ever done.

With the houseboat we went out a ways, found a arm off the main channel, took a finger off that arm and tied the houseboat to a rocky shore. Off the back of the 60ft boat was 50 foot of water. Ran around the lake on ski boats, and each couple took turns cooking meals for everyone. About the 3rd night it was hot and we had moved inside to play cards or a board game. About 10pm we saw a couple of raccoons come on the front deck snooping for food. One of them zeroed in on a steel clad Coleman cooler, with the full rotation locking mechanism. He/she took about 3 seconds to open the latch and start to lift the lid until we scared them off.

dhagood said...

the title seems somewhat related to warren zevon

Achilles said...

Suppressors were made so you don't have to wake up the kids when you see one in the yard.

Lucien said...

In Long Beach we had a mama raccoon who would come to visit every year with that year's brood of babies. There is not much that is cuter than baby raccoons trying to eat grapes, which we would roll out to them. We left out food and a birdbath full of water for them. The raccoons coexisted peacefully with our cats, though they weren't exactly friends. Around 2:00 one morning, we heard a strange sound and though there were raccoons mating. It turned out one of the babies had got a paw trapped under one of the tiles on our neighbors' Spanish tile roof. My wife climbed up on a ladder and pried the tile up freeing the raccoon. Mama was grateful. We missed them when we moved away.

Guildofcannonballs said...


As clunky as it is, that is why the Coens were able to make No Country so seamless.

When I write Coen's it means their work. I used to think people would try and comprehend, bu then I remembered I had three reasons for being inaccurate here at the Althouse blog.

Precluding defensiveness.

I need to be paid.

And another one. Probably like "I gotta keep you on your toes" or something.

Guildofcannonballs said...

If it looks like a little baby, like Bill but extremely unlike Hillary, well then you ought forgive them like you would a baby.

Just... Look at 'em.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Seems the best hope for America is Liz Warren after 16 months of campaigning.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Only Dwight from The Office would question whether 16 months of campaigning is harder than 16 hours of labor. Liz will come up with a great, winning, leadership-wise answer.

She was Harvard Dean for God sakes.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Sounds like voting for Denver Mayor Jaime Geilas or something pissed off the Clintons, Mike Handcocks handmaidens.

Guildofcannonballs said...

I'd like to recreate '68 in Denver, when the progs were just dominating law schools.

Now that domination has spread though, blog-wise or not.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

"He who stay up late watching raccoons get dark circles under eyes" --Coonfucius

Guildofcannonballs said...

"@Guidocannonballs

how did the cherry work out?"

My cherry worked out okay.

Think I just got a saw delivered actually*.

But I found a $5 bow per never-crusty R and used that for all the little branches.

Only thing left now is about a 60lb trunk.

Sausages impecable, like bacon can taste like candy but Italian Sausage.

Overdid the 4lbs of pork but pre-saturated on sale from Kroger (King Soopers).

The $6.74 ribs, reduced from $13.99, won approval of even the most discerning critic.

Dog loved it all so much he threw up; near the door. I felt bad about that, and that alone.

*Confirmed

Guildofcannonballs said...

Basting helps; even temps with a high end smoker would help more I conjecture.

If, and I am, I am going to need to have to compensate because of a $20 shit smoker, then I will find free fuel. That's my compensation.

And to use it wisely. And to experiment. And to learn.

*the best meat in WI I ever had was smoked sausage from Chicago and I have held a grudge ever since.

Unknown said...

Raccoon stories. OK,

The Architect Of Sleep: Crackerjack story, but I think the publisher screwed him over somehow and he never wrote the sequel.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

@Guidocannonballs

...oh-- forgot to tell you-- check out Silky saws from Japan
excellent quality and performance, replaceable blades, faster/easier than a bow saw.
Return your other saw!!
when's the next feast?

Guildofcannonballs said...



"then bounce it till the cords sprang off. You'd hear them out there, working away on opening"

"You would" - Jim Carrey the Canadian America Hater First Class.

Guildofcannonballs said...

As institutions have been used, if you confuse patriotism with knowledge, we can see.

I litteralluy ust assumed Althouse deleted (shadow -baneed) my comments because I am too truthfully powerful and it hursts all of u, thetruth.????

narciso said...

Why do you sound like del Toros character in the usual suspects?

Guildofcannonballs said...

Real World: 83-17.

Denver will not be 3rd class owners.

83-17.

Who sells that? What can you sell??

Clinton's love Hancock

Guildofcannonballs said...

Is it Geilas osr Deilaears or WhT?

I have driven the south santa fe arts district, ,any times.

No way without Jaime it is that way. Nonpartisan.

ough town, err'bdy

My Denver.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Q

y wWh

anyone care about a local DEnver mayor election?
Unless those Clinton's can take take take more than they ever offereded much less delivered.

Guildofcannonballs said...

You wanna be someone, oh be someone??

Donate to Jaime Gilleaeasseaserasfasdf o Denver.

Guildofcannonballs said...

I know tiney,

n rgwe,


But you know you now have a chance, minute, but a chance, to remove a Clinton crony from a mayorship.
She is 79% prog, enemy, and Handcock is 100% prog enemu.

Google her and give. For God's sake.

Gillies.

Jamie Giellis.

Denver mayoral candidate Jamie Giellis stumbled this week when asked on a live Facebook program what “NAACP” stands for.

Giellis was being interviewed Tuesday on “The Brother Jeff Show,” which focuses on African-American issues. Off camera, a man asked her what the acronym means.

“National African-American ... ,” Giellis began, before the man told her she was wrong.

“You gonna test me on this?” Giellis asked, looking uncomfortable.

NAACP stands for “National Association for the Advancement of Colored People.” The civil rights organization was founded more than a century ago and has chapters across the U.S.

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/denver-mayoral-candidate-flubs-when-asked-what-naacp-stands-for

Guildofcannonballs said...

"Blogger wildswan said...
I had a part-Samoyed dog who used to kill raccoons. "

My friend if I may be so bold, may I suggest you still have that part-Samoyed dog.

reader said...

We were having work done on our house and someone left the access to our crawl space open. A mother raccoon moved in with her babies. We had two companies out that couldn’t get her and those babies out. Then we found a man who I swear you could almost hear banjos as his background music. He got rid of the raccoons in one night using male raccoon pee. I guess the males eat the babies. That’s when we found out that raccoon damage is covered under your homeowners insurance.

That’s also when we found a raccoon trying to drown our labrador in the pool.

Guildofcannonballs said...

The King Returns is the greatest finale, because of Christ.

Fantasy is a re-iffication of core values in a decent, just society, and Christ's is the only society considered so decent and so just that flocking to it is the continual problem without solution.

Because of Dogma of course.

Fen said...

Althouse: I'm deleting all comments about the paywall. I know there's a paywall. We all do.

No, we don't. Nowhere do you warn us your link leads to a paywall. How about extending the courtesy of a warning so you don't waste OUR time. Or do you even think about people other than yourself?

Now, say something interesting and relevant. Don't be boring!!

When did you become such a censorous Nazi. Deleting 3 posts because we are "not allowed" to complain about an article being behind a paywall? Go fuck yourself.

Kevin said...

Beware the raccoon feces. Baylisascaris procyonis egges aren't something you want to introduce to your digestive track.

Why are people eating raccoon feces?

Is this the new Tide pods?

Kevin said...

Beautiful coon!

Wait, can you still say coon?

Because autocorrect keeps changing it to coin.

And I know coins are long since out of fashion.

Howard said...

Blogger Fen said...

Althouse: I'm deleting all comments about the paywall. I know there's a paywall. We all do.

No, we don't. Nowhere do you warn us your link leads to a paywall. How about extending the courtesy of a warning so you don't waste OUR time. Or do you even think about people other than yourself?

Now, say something interesting and relevant. Don't be boring!!

When did you become such a censorous Nazi. Deleting 3 posts because we are "not allowed" to complain about an article being behind a paywall? Go fuck yourself.


This is the type locality where deplorables go beyond cuck to entitled snowflake. This POS is the intellectual hero of you alt-house strumpets. He's the fenster on the depraved soul of the republican chickenhawk wing of the american neo-antoinetteites. He now waits for George to tell him about the rabbits.

Big Mike said...

@Kevin, in the 1960s the word “coon” was redneck slang for a black male. Autocorrect is merely trying to keep you from being politically incorrect. I haven’t heard it used that way since the early 1970s, but perhaps I started moving in better circles back then.

Big Mike said...

So saith Howard, the educated fool.

Howard said...

Good Morning, Big Mike!

AllenS said...

Where does one find male raccoon pee? Is this something that you can buy on ebay? Amazon?

Carter Wood said...

Raccoons have one of those wonderful literal animal names in German - Waschbär - washing bear.

They're a nuisance, though, with one wild population having grown from escaping from a fur farm in Brandenburg after a WWII airstrike.

Damn it, they're eating turtles.

Nichevo said...

Now, say something interesting and relevant. Don't be boring!!

Go fuck yourself.

This is the type locality where deplorables go beyond cuck to entitled snowflake.

Howard, she was talking to you. I thought you realized this wherefore you've been staying away.

Ann needs to be (told to go fuck herself) and often, and by someone who knows how.

Howard said...

https://www.amazon.com/Raccoon-Urine-100-Plastic-Bottle/dp/B06XY74LYN

Howard said...

I don't even know who you are Nichveno. At least BM has a go to catch-phrase whenever I interrupt romper-room

Fernandistein said...

Fen said...When did you become such a censorous Nazi.

When did you become such a half-witted cry baby?

poorlydrawn racoon comic, now with raccoon.

BleachBit-and-Hammers said...

oh. I forgot. Just the other day, I was a passenger seated in a vehicle driving back from Longmont. It was rush hour on the diagonal, so I suggested we take the lovely rolling back-roads. I look over and there is a bald eagle. It appeared as if the eagle was trying to gain speed and altitude. He was flying at the same height as my visual field thru the window. I wish I had it on video, but I would have missed it fishing thru my purse. Anyway, this bald eagle was flying close enough, right along with us, made for a fantastic show. Then the eagle turned, and as it flew over, I could see that the eagle had something in its talons. I think it was a young prairie dog.

Nichevo said...


Howard said...
I don't even know who you are Nichveno. At least BM has a go to catch-phrase whenever I interrupt romper-room

5/22/19, 7:19 AM

You prefer catchphrases?

BleachBit-and-Hammers said...

Howard like his totalitarian leftwing fascism - straight up in a sippy cup.

J. Farmer said...

Don’t have any raccoon stories so I’ll just share this

Big Mike said...

Back when traveling circuses were a thing savvy gardeners would come around and buy lion and tiger manure. Wasn’t all that great as fertilizer but a guarantee that rabbits and raccoons would stay out of your veggies, and deer not eat your azaleas. Wife and I have had good luck with granulated fox urine for chasing away squirrels and rabbits from our garden. Don’t know whether it would keep out raccoons, because (I’m about to jinx myself!) they haven’t been a problem in our neighborhood, despite backing into woods. But we have had a black bear get on the deck.

(Be sure to use the Althouse Amazon portal if you want to get a small container of fox urine.)

Bruce Hayden said...

“oh. I forgot. Just the other day, I was a passenger seated in a vehicle driving back from Longmont. It was rush hour on the diagonal, so I suggested we take the lovely rolling back-roads. I look over and there is a bald eagle. It appeared as if the eagle was trying to gain speed and altitude. He was flying at the same height as my visual field thru the window. I wish I had it on video, but I would have missed it fishing thru my purse. Anyway, this bald eagle was flying close enough, right along with us, made for a fantastic show. Then the eagle turned, and as it flew over, I could see that the eagle had something in its talons. I think it was a young prairie dog.”

Been along there many a time. Friend bought a B&B in the middle of it several years ago. The Diagonal is the road that runs NE from Boulder to Longmont. I expect that it’s name comes from its direction, esp when most roads around there seem to run fairly much along section lines (this was originally farm country), which means due N/S or E/W. Instead, the diagonal runs NE/SW.

We are maybe 1/4 mile from an eagle’s nest here in NW MT, which is a good part of why our cat was recently declawed to be a strictly indoor cat. I think that these eagles mostly feed on fish in the river a couple hundred yards away from their nest, but expect that is augmented by the occasional rabbit or maybe even small domestic pet.

PresbyPoet said...

Sad raccoon story. We had a large English Spot Rabbit who lived in our fenced back yard. We figured she was safe since she was bigger than any cats, and dogs can't climb 6'fences. Early one morning, we heard her death scream. I went out the back door to see the biggest killer Raccoon I ever saw climbing the back fence.

That incident started me accidentally writing poetry. None before, thousands since.
I felt guilty. I had not protected her. If I had kept her in a cage she would have lived. As I wrote, and erased, it turned into a poem about freedom, danger, love and cages:

The start:
The Death of Alice
(killed by freedom)

The member of our household who expressed her love the most, Died December 14,1996 at 7:20 AM.

Alice died because I gave her FREEDOM,
FREEDOM to leave protected safety,
to die.

Twas Freedom killed her,
but freedom let her live,
live a joyful life.

If I had protected her,
she might have lived longer, but less joyful,
she would have lived, but not LIVED."

After another 2 pages it ends:

"Lord, thank you for the message,
you sent through Alice,
of DEATH & LOVE & Sorrow,
of PAIN, & TRUST & YOU."

So I have a strange relationship with raccoons. First, the death of a friend, but also the start of much creativity, and understanding how a good God can allow awful things to happen.

I have wondered who would have won, if he had turned to fight?