September 14, 2018

"I wasn’t looking for somebody to be extremely emotional all the time with me. I was never looking for a drama queen."

"When you think of what it is you’re looking for in a significant other, you’re generally talking about someone to talk to, someone to spend your day with, someone to talk about your day with, someone to go places with and enjoy life. Never in that is there 'I want someone that’s going to cry at the drop of a hat, or be mad at me for no reason.'... In any relationship, the same exact feelings you have in the first two years of a relationship — that insane, intense drive — always tend to change after a couple of years. They turn to laying your life out with each other. They turn to be more everyday, logical... And for her to be able to reciprocate that way to me, on a routine basis, is fantastic."

From an interview in The Cut with a man who has been in a relationship for 19 years with a woman who is diagnosed as a psychopath. She got the diagnosis about 4 years into the relationship.

22 comments:

Birkel said...

Different strokes.
I would be worried about the higher potential for murdering me in my sleep.

Unknown said...

His answers in the interview are very straight and un-emotional. Is he a psychopath?

-sw

Ann Althouse said...

He began by finding her very beautiful, then he noticed she was different... finally, it seems, he rather likes the way she's different. She's not a drama queen. She's cold, and he likes it.

tcrosse said...

The woods are full of them.

Unknown said...

Not surprising. Probably a small sample of people that like and appreciate a partner that is a drama queen.

-sw

Angle-Dyne, Samurai Buzzard said...

A very fine example of the contemporary trend in science/medical writing of producing articles that are entirely devoid of information.

But it's New York Magazine, so I guess that's not really the point of the exercise.

Bill, Republic of Texas said...

I would guess the sex is better with a drama queen than a sociopath.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

"do you think you have grown a thicker skin because of her?"

"Well, scar tissue, so, in a sense, yes"

rhhardin said...

It doesn't mention sense of humor.

gf: Our relationship has to be based on more than just laughing at jokes.

me: It does?

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

@rhhardin
gf: Our relationship has to be based on more than just laughing at jokes.

response: (slaps knee) Good One! Honey I luv your sense of humor!

Mountain Maven said...

Or as my brother likes to say: "I could have done my 15 to 20 and be out by now.". Yet he's still married.

Amadeus 48 said...

No cruises with that lady!

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

"You are beautiful...and angular" --Dieter from Sprockets

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

"...and if you were a gas, you would be inert"

wwww said...



Sounds more like psychopathic traits & some autism thrown in. But who knows? Not enough information. Maybe she's a true psychopath, absolutely cold, and has no concern or capacity for others beyond the transactional.

Wouldn't want to be her kid.

rcocean said...

In order to stay with a beautiful "drama queen" she'd have to be like- Marilyn Monroe - Grace Kelly - fill in the blank - level sexiness.

Otherwise, I'm outta there like a shot.

Which is why I married East Asian. Minimal Drama. Lots of down to earth practicality.

Ann Althouse said...

Some of you are missing that she’s NOT a drama queen. She’s the opposite.

William said...

Good looks in a woman trump a lot of character flaws and deficits. If, say, Kate Upton had OCD or was miserly , it might be months, years even, before you noticed it.

Yancey Ward said...

The real clue should have been when she wrote "How To Murder Your Husband".

Yancey Ward said...

I feel like the 19 years length is a cover to hide the fact that the interview is with Bill Clinton.

The Crack Emcee said...

Relationships are hard.

Unknown said...

> And for her to be able to reciprocate that way to me, on a routine basis, is fantastic

Sounds like one of those rationalizations for "lack of empathy"

which will be utterly false after the divorce

"Oh, I loved her Eddie Murphy laugh, it seems so unique..."
"I can't believe I listened to that donkey bray for 10 years"

Time to play Paradise by the Dashboard Light