January 23, 2018

"The mess that the airlines are in today... this dope filled world —— get in a long tube with a bunch of demons —— and it's deadly"/"And it works on your heart."

Evangelists explain why they need to fly in private planes:



"We got a dyin' world around us, Jesse. We got a dyin' nation around us. And we can't even get there on no airlines...."

Yeah, I don't like the airlines either.

95 comments:

Viking In Winter said...

Ann, how did you come across this lunatic? Stale air, inadequate cabin pressure and indifferent flight attendants are enough to put anyone off, but demons? Palezzz...

Mr Wibble said...

http://babylonbee.com/news/archaeologists-uncover-jesuss-gulfstream-jet/

traditionalguy said...

First Class has less demons. And there is the free alcohol.

Henry said...

Statler and Waldor do religion.

Henry said...

Waldorf.

Henry said...

Without the demons, this is the same argument William F. Buckley used to defend his Limo.

Vet66 said...

Flying these days is like an extended version of Disneyland's Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. Even first class accentuates the divisiveness of our culture as we pay extra to avoid the victim atmosphere of coach. New rules include, don't fly before, during, or after holidays and weekends, don't fly at all during the winter where airport infrastructure will fail at the most inconvenient times of travel. Even if you buy your seat you are not guaranteed that some so-called classless victim grandee politician with a big, angry mouth will not boot you out of your seat back to the dreaded coach reminiscent of Dante's inferno. It crushes the soul...

Infinite Monkeys said...

I was hoping that God would tell him to rely on his faith and try flying without the plane, but no such luck.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Yeah, I don't like the airlines either.

Me too. I hate those people who insist on bringing their untrained animals on board with them who get out of control. I'm talking about the dogs AND the screaming kids.

Drunks!! Overweight, oh Hell...fat people, who spill over onto your seat and get you all sweaty with their body flab. Ever smaller seats and cramped leg room in order to make more out of each inch of space.

People who smell either because they don't wash, or because they are wearing too much scented products.

People who can't get the clue that you are wearing earbuds, listening to music (because the kids), looking at a book, and who STILL insist on talking at you and worse talking about politics.

Getting sick! Crappy food! NO food! Lost luggage! Delays! Missed connections!

Flying today is not anything to look forward to. I'd rather drive or not go at all.

Can Of Cheese for Hunter said...

The Lord told me - get yourself a private jet. OK. Sure.

Danno said...

Religious lunatic much?

I am sure he's thinking, Praise the Lord and send me your hard-earned dollars so I can glorify the Lord in a brand-new Gulfstream to help in my ministry!

richlb said...

Boy, it's amazing how contorted you can get justifying a lavish life. I'd be more understanding if they just said "We have our own airplane because we like it and it's nice."

Can Of Cheese for Hunter said...

Travel is not glamorous. If you arrive without incident or without feeling violated = win.

Kevin said...

I guess because of the slash, I was reading the headline like rap lyrics. It reads better that way, TBH.

Bill R said...

Why doesn't God just whisk them about, wherever they need to go?

Bob Boyd said...

I don't think Jesus even had his own donkey. How did he manage?

Fernandinande said...

Most people believe all kinds of ludicrous crap:

Over one half (63 percent, to be exact) of young Americans 18-29 years old now believe in the notion that invisible, non-corporeal entities called “demons” can take partial or total control of human beings, revealed an October 2012 Public Policy Polling survey that also showed this belief isn’t declining among the American population generally; it’s growing.

Danno said...

The airlines have been democratized as a result of deregulation, so get used to it. Back in the regulated days, only very affluent people (law profs, etal.) were able to travel by air.

I remember my ski trips in college in the early 70s when the "rich kids from the affluent suburbs" flew to Denver, Jackson Hole, or Salt Lake City to ski on our Christmas and Spring breaks, while us more moderate income or cheapskate types drove the 20 hours to ski. The r/t airfares were $400 back then when that was real money.

bleh said...

Reminds me a bit of the Clintons and their slush f-, er, their foundation. They were doing good, important work. Don’t you dare question how they spend donations.

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...

I initially thought you were quoting some great punkabilly lyrics. Ah, well.

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...

“Over one half (63 percent, to be exact) of young Americans 18-29 years old now believe in the notion that invisible, non-corporeal entities called “demons” can take partial or total control of human beings, revealed an October 2012 Public Policy Polling survey that also showed this belief isn’t declining among the American population generally; it’s growing.”

This is what happens when you import a shitload of Third World peasants.

Ann Althouse said...

"Ann, how did you come across this lunatic?"

Twitter.

Henry said...

Ah, this dope filled world.

Bob Boyd said...

WWJT

What would Jesus tweet?

Ann Althouse said...

"Why doesn't God just whisk them about, wherever they need to go?

Ha ha. That's about what I said midway through.

robother said...

Jesus. Just when I thought air travel couldn't get any worse. Lord, deliver us from poor pentecostal preachers who can't afford a private jet.

Ann Althouse said...

I love the way they're special because they need to talk out loud to God during a flight and you can't do that on a commercial airline.

Yeah, you will look like a terrorist and freak everyone out.

Bob Boyd said...

Maybe God gave them a plane to spare all the innocent people in coach who would otherwise have to sit with these clowns.

Curious George said...

"Ann Althouse said...
"Why doesn't God just whisk them about, wherever they need to go?

Ha ha. That's about what I said midway through."

Reminds me of the story about Muhammad Ali, who was told to fasten his seatbelt by a flight attendent. We he responded "Superman doesn't need a seatbelt" she replied "Superman doesn't need an airplane." and he laughed, and complied.

WK said...

Didn’t Kenneth Copeland play a pilot on the Thunderbirds tv series?

Meade said...

"Maybe God gave them a plane to spare all the innocent people in coach who would otherwise have to sit with these clowns."

LET'S [HOLY] ROLL!

MadisonMan said...

The Lord also told that one guy to dye his hair atrociously.

traditionalguy said...

Kenneth Copeland was Oral Robert's pilot. He has seen many an Oklahoma healing miracle. And he actually is half Cherokee. But Oral Roberts still died.

Bob Boyd said...

These guys' motto is, "God loves a closer."

Wince said...

It's like they're bragging to their followers about having joined the "Mile High Club" with God.

Except the donors are the ones getting fucked.

Heartless Aztec said...

I. Hate. Airlines. Will drive a week rather than fly in an airline for four hours. That said, I love to fly. Just not on airlines.

Robert Cook said...

If they're really preachers of Jesus' word, they should be seeking out opportunities to be among the wretched of the earth, in order to minister to their needs and suffering.

But then...that's only if they're really preachers of Jesus' word. It they're opportunistic frauds, they fly in private jets.

exiledonmainstreet, green-eyed devil said...

It's easier to fly with Catholics. When we get nervous we don't start praying loudly. We just look out the window and say silent Hail Marys.

Odi said...

These men are charlatans.

gilbar said...

remember the olden days, when we only asked The Lord for a Mercedes Benz?
now we want private jets

SteveR said...

I thought Copeland was dead. Do you bellieve in miracles?

Robert Cook said...

He's calling the people he should be ministering to--everyday people, families, children, etc.--"demons."

Truth is often spake by mistake.

rhhardin said...

Back when I was flying, you could buy a nice airplane for well under $2000.

rhhardin said...

Like a puppy, the acquisition cost isn't the big one.

trumpintroublenow said...

I don't claim to be an expert on these sorts of things, but is it necessary to talk to God out loud for him to hear you? I thought not.

Freeman Hunt said...

No leg room and now they're filling the planes with demons? Well, sheesh. I think that's a step too far. One might even go so far as to call it rude.

At least there are plenty of comfort animals now to send the demons into.

Can Of Cheese for Hunter said...

ot: The corrupt leftwing fascist mind-crime machine is coming after your sports.

Paddy O said...

These guys are extremely influential over the last 40 years, following the charismatic/pentecostal foray into the Prosperity Gospel. Also called the health/wealth Gospel.

The television network TBN pretty much defined itself with these types, and they have extensive "ministries" reaching all over the world. A substantial portion of African Christianity is oriented in this approach.

Basically, the ostentatious display is seen as a sign of God's favor, not unlike Solomon and Israel's connection with success and favor in the kingdom days.

The basic message is that God's blessings are for today and experienced in societal signs of success. A core part is basically a pyramid scheme, where people are called to take a risk in faith to give a percentage of money to these folks, and then God blesses their faith with a tenfold increase in their own wealth.

It's really the original meaning of simony, assuming one canbuy blessings and power. Simon was seen as the arch-heretic, the source of a lot of later heresies. These guys are deceivers of the worst sort, taking advantage of those who are desperate.

It's a very understandable message to those who are desperate, that God will save people from financial struggles, if they give more money to those who represent God.

Of course, we know that giving a tithe in order to get all our dreams met is the government's job. It's politicians, not preachers, who are supposed to get rich with that kind of scheme.

Bob Boyd said...

"He's calling the people he should be ministering to--everyday people, families, children, etc.--"demons." "

It's almost like he he puts those people into a Basket of Deplorables.

trumpintroublenow said...

Also surrounded by liberals -- even worse than demons.

Left Bank of the Charles said...

You have to admire the chutzpah. And God did provide the money that’s whisking them around in these private planes. I have a cousin whose airplane mechanic ministry is going around the world to fix the small planes used by missionaries of the Gospel in remote parts of the world.

Robert Cook said...

"These guys are extremely influential over the last 40 years, following the charismatic/pentecostal foray into the Prosperity Gospel. Also called the health/wealth Gospel."


AKA "The Fake Gospel."

Henry said...

@Left Bank of the Charles -- My neighbor loaned me a very interesting book by a pilot who piloted missionaries and bible translators in and around New Guinea. Some very hair-raising stories. Shoestrings and rubberbands.

Henry said...

The hardest part of having your own private jet is getting the plane through the eye of a needle.

Paddy O said...

AKA "The Fake Gospel."

Fake isn't a strong enough word. Mendacious?

Inga...Allie Oop said...

“Over one half (63 percent, to be exact) of young Americans 18-29 years old now believe in the notion that invisible, non-corporeal entities called “demons” can take partial or total control of human beings, revealed an October 2012 Public Policy Polling survey that also showed this belief isn’t declining among the American population generally; it’s growing.”

“This is what happens when you import a shitload of Third World peasants.”

You can’t rightfully blame third world peasants for this type of thinking. It’s part and parcel of fundamentalist/ evangelical Christian teaching that has been around since the early evangelists who converted throngs of people in those tent revivals. Fundamentalists even think that members of other Christian religions are going straight to hell unless they become “saved”. Evangelical fundamentalist Christians have become mainstream and that’s why we hear these two charlatans speaking openly about needing private planes, they know that they can get away with it because their followers are so completely taken over.

mezzrow said...

That's not going to do his karma any good, y'know?

Inga...Allie Oop said...

I recall Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker, who suckered thousands of believers on their CBN show out of money to build their mansion with gold faucets. They still had followers/ believers even after it all crashed down on their heads.

Gahrie said...

Hey at least this guy didn't get rich telling the rest of us to stop flying while flying around in luxury himself. Give me a preacher over a progressive any day.

etbass said...

"And Jesus saith unto him, The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head." (Matt 8:20)

This puts the lie to the prosperity gospel.

robother said...

Of course, you don't have to charter a private jet to talk to God. There's always...

the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it raining fire in the sky
You can talk to God and listen to the casual reply
Rocky mountain high

Anonymous said...

Flying today has all the charm of a Trailways bus 40 years ago.

hombre said...

Robert Cook said...
"If they're really preachers of Jesus' word, they should be seeking out opportunities to be among the wretched of the earth, in order to minister to their needs and suffering.

But then...that's only if they're really preachers of Jesus' word. It they're opportunistic frauds, they fly in private jets."

More Cook logic.

I'm not inclined to defend these guys, but clearly flying in private jets can create more opportunities to minister to the wretched as well as the not wretched than flying commercial.

Comanche Voter said...

Bob Boyd's comment contained a great line "God loves a closer."

I've been aware of Kenneth Copeland for maybe 30 years now. I'm not necessarily buying his message, but I was/am intrigued by his speaking style. If you are in the persuasion business (and that includes trial lawyers and Scott Adams) you can learn a lot by watching Copeland's speaking mannerisms.

Along the way Copeland lost a lot of weight, shed a wife or two and made a ton of dough. His new Gulfstream is his latest toy. But if a corporate CEO (and his or her senior officers) need private jets to get around to remote locations (and I can attest that they do), then Kenneth Copeland--who heads a very big business, can make the same claim.

I still see Copeland's TV stuff maybe once or twice a year--just to check to see if has that old "closer's mentality". He does--hasn't lost a step as he ages.

Down Valley Scum said...

These guys are huking the left tail of the Bell Curve. Kinda like Obama did on the right side.

bagoh20 said...

I think flying is awesome, and I do it all the time. If you don't like it, don't do it. Choose a better method of travel. Of course there is none, because it's the safest, cheapest fastest, and easiest method ever invented, but yea, let's pretend we hate it, becuase it should be unrealistically and unaffordably better. Deregulation and fierce competition has made it the best it can be at a reasonable price, and it's actually incredibly cheap for the speed, technology and safety that you get. That's why it's so popular. Of course it could be better, but not better at it's price. That's why airlines are always in financial trouble. The level of safety requires expensive regulations, and redundancy. Just think about what's happening. Hundreds of people flying through the air at 500 mph, in a sky full of other similar groups, zipping out and into densely populated areas in explosive filled machines, and it's the safest form of travel at the same time!

I often think that if we could bring back someone through time from the past like Benjamin Franklin, Jefferson, or Isaac Newton that of all the developments since their time, they would be most amazed by commercial airplane travel. It still seems improbable that we could or would do such a thing. It's just an amazing human accomplishment that we take far too much for granted.

Sure it's got it's problems with comfort, and other issues, but we do it a lot becuase it's so amazing that we can first do it at all, and second nearly all of us also afford it.

narciso said...

The airplane is a conveyance ostensibly for the message to be heard, but that is a silly argument he puts forth

mockturtle said...

If one goes abroad or needs to get somewhere in a hurry, flying is the only way to go. You couldn't get me on a cruise ship with a cattle prod and free tickets.

Gahrie said...

I often think that if we could bring back someone through time from the past like Benjamin Franklin, Jefferson, or Isaac Newton that of all the developments since their time, they would be most amazed by commercial airplane travel.

Nope. Toilet paper.

We take it for granted, but it really is a modern invention.

n.n said...

Entitled politicians who displace constituents and demand priority service. Oh, well. Most of us fly "baggage" class. So, we will not, in any case, be their subjects. Get a private plane at your expense, or sit with all the colorful crabs.

bleh said...

I rather enjoy watching Jesse Duplantis. I know he's a snake, but I can't help it. He's entertaining and quite charismatic -- almost mesmerizing. Mind you, I'm not a particularly religious person. But I recognize his gift.

Still, the narcissism he displays in the video is astonishing. Copeland comes off like an idiot, whereas what Duplantis says is more subtle, and therefore more pernicious. Why is Duplantis flying to different cities every day of the week? Why is that necessary? We can easily laugh at Copeland's idiotic "tube of demons nonsense -- heck, even his many gullible viewers might raise an eyebrow at the implication that they are demons.

But Duplantis insists he must travel (or at least be able to travel) every day to spread the Word. Why? Has Christianity not reached the cities of Boston, San Antonio and Chicago? Really? Is he unable to convey his message through TV or the Internet? Is his message really so different from what the poor, benighted people of those other American cities have been exposed to?

I can understand occasional travel ... but EVERY DAY? I find his arrogant assertion of his "needs" to be quite breathtaking.

bagoh20 said...

What is most amazing about toilet paper is that it took so long to invent. It seems like something that cavemen should have come up with about the same time as fire. And that brings up another thing that everyone is dying to talk about: why are humans cursed with such a messy shitting function. My dog doesn't need toilet paper, and he stays clean. What further proves his superiority is that if he did make a mess of it, I would be my job to fix it. We might be the lowest form of mammalian life.

lgv said...

Regardless of your religious beliefs, these evangelists are nothing but con men. You can believe in what they preach, but they are con men out to live the good life off other people's money.

If you want to spread Christianity, go to your local church, paricipate in Wednesday night visitation, and give to an affiliated missionary fund.

Robert Schuller had a brother. He was bald and a little paunchy. He and his wife used to travel the backroads in an airstream visiting small gospel churchs. They lived their lives off the small contributions from these small congregations. Robert Schuller chose to water down his religious teaching and create a drive-in cathedral, a monument to himself. Apparently God finally got tired of him, and he ended up bankrupt. It's the "look at me" virtue signalling of the evangelist set.

Robert Cook said...

"'AKA "The Fake Gospel.'

"Fake isn't a strong enough word. Mendacious?"


I intentionally used the word of the day (and of the year), as in "fake" news.

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...


"You can’t rightfully blame third world peasants for this type of thinking. It’s part and parcel of fundamentalist/ evangelical Christian teaching that has been around since the early evangelists who converted throngs of people in those tent revivals"

Yeah, 18-29 year-olds are just flocking to tent revivals. Nope, the gullibility of the young on this subject can be traced directly to Islam, Third World Catholicism, Vodun, and a multitude of Shithole Superstitions and feeble-minded New Age spiritualities.

bleh said...

Kenneth Copeland may or may not be a billionaire. Jesus. Seriously, I'm asking Jesus why any full-time, self-made preacher should be worth so much.

Paddy O said...

"I'm asking Jesus..."

Jesus isn't the one to ask in regards to all this. I refer you to the other place...

If the temptations were taking place today, Satan would take Jesus to the airport and say, if you just bow down, I'll give you your own jetliner.

Jim at said...

Flying today is not anything to look forward to. I'd rather drive or not go at all.

Ditto.

California Snow said...

That's some good old fashioned priestcraft right there.

Luke Lea said...

If you have to fly all the time all over the country, who wouldn't choose a private jet if they can afford it? Travellers who fly commercial out of any of our major major airports are treated like cattle; and what with checking in through security, vast concourses, and making connections, a two hour direct flight from point A to point B can easily take all day. So I don't blame these guys, who are only human.

mockturtle said...

Bagoh says: It seems like something that cavemen should have come up with about the same time as fire.

Fire was tried initially but was deemed too painful.

mockturtle said...

I think when Jesus spoke of 'wolves in sheep's clothing' he may have had these guys in mind.

readering said...

I guess they're flying from one nowheresville revival tent to the next. But then shouldn't they be catching rides with crop dusters?

Mark Daniels said...

Guess they never noticed that Jesus, even though He was intent on going to Jerusalem to fulfill His mission of dying and rising for us, always moved among the crowds and made Himself interruptible.

In fact, it's when we Christians move among people and allow ourselves and our agendas to be interrupted by the needs of other people that we can do God's will. Copeland and Duplantis seem to forget the whole point of God's incarnation, His taking on human flesh in Jesus. He came to move among the evil, demon-possessed, the druggies, and everyone else. If God isn't too good to do that, then I'm surely not!

This crap pedaled by these two (and others, like Creflo Dollar) is nothing more than a rationalization for their materialistic impulses. They're not seeking to help people or glorify God, but to help and glorify themselves.

Stuff like this makes most Christians blood boil. So much so that a lot of our work these days is cleaning up the messes made by false teaching like this.

BUMBLE BEE said...

What Luke Lea said. If you fly with business folks you get a better environment.
Dennis Prager mentioned seeing a fully naked woman being "serviced" on the in-flight movie of the passenger screen next to him.
Google "Germs on airplanes". Most microbes from below the ahem, "beltline".
P.S. If you ever heard Reverend Richard Wayne Penniman preach, you might be "saved".

Etienne said...

All Protestants are going to hell. End of story.

Everything else said about them is of no help.

Amen.

Bill Peschel said...

Pity they don't ask climate change advocates why they're flying private to Bali.

They're serving God, too. Gaia.

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

Gahrie said...

Seriously, I'm asking Jesus why any full-time, self-made preacher should be worth so much.

For the same reason any other entertainer is.

Etienne said...

Our Priest, and our Bishop have no airplanes.

That's how God intended it.

If they got uppity and demanded one, the Pope would send them to some shithole in Honduras.

I guarantee...

ALP said...

RE: the 63% of Americans that believe in demons...

Not much different from the New Agey belief in "toxins".

Josephbleau said...

Blogger traditionalguy said...
Kenneth Copeland was Oral Robert's pilot. He has seen many an Oklahoma healing miracle. And he actually is half Cherokee. But Oral Roberts still died.

How did he die? Drowned while out walking his pet fish? I fly out of Chicago Midway on Southwest and don't have a moments trouble 'tall, cheap too.

Can Of Cheese for Hunter said...

The guy on the left is .... odd. Amen=.

320Busdriver said...

Talk about effin demons! This is why I fly for an airline and never want to fly corporate. I can't imagine having to share air with these two cretins, much less schlep their bags or pick up after them. But hey, if you can afford your Falcon jet, you might as well fly in to Aspen to hang with the beautiful people.

traditionalguy said...

Tommy Jefferson re-wrote the KJV new testament to remove all of the miracles out of scripture. And he has nothing on the commentariat. But the real trouble with healing miracles from Christian faith is that they are not reproducible in a controlled scientific experiment. It is terrible that we are not in control of the Holy Spirit's healings,but then if we were, we would just be practicing withcraft. A better response might be to say thank you.

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