November 2, 2017

At Craps' Last Café...

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... you can remember the unattainable laxation, sneer at what you call your youth, and close with a yelp to Providence. What remains of all that misery? A girl in a shabby green coat, on a railway-station platform? No?

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Will Althouse figure out how to escape from the casino? I don't know but consider using The Althouse Amazon Portal.

24 comments:

Bob Ellison said...

A friend of mine, not a gambler, has this brilliant technique.

He walks up to a machine next to one of those blue-hair slot players, one of them connected with a coiled wire to a slot machine by the little card that earns points at the hotel, and says to me,

I think this one's ready to pay. What do you think? It looks ready to pay.

Then he puts a coin in and pulls the lever.

If it pays, he says, See?! I was right! 'Scuse me, ma'am; it was ready to pay.

AllenS said...

So, did you gamble at all, Althouse? No matter how little.

tcrosse said...

Beware the Craps Tables. Money can change hands there at an astonishing rate, and they clutter the table with sucker bets.

Snark said...

That Multi Poker is sexually harassing me.

madAsHell said...

Will Althouse figure out how to escape from the casino?

When you run out of money, they are more than happy to escort you to the door!!

David53 said...

Go to a real craps table, tell them in a loud voice you want to place $100 on 8, because there are 8 letters in your last name and it's your lucky number. Throw a $100 in the middle of the table and stare at the person sitting across from the stickman until they make eye contact with you then say, "Hi, let's have some fun!" Smile like you would if you were meeting Obama and wait for the fun to begin. If they offer you the dice tell them you don't want to roll, do not touch the dice or you will lose. This means there has to be at least one other customer at the table to roll the dice. If they try to give you any money tell them no you want to press the 8 all the way. Do this 3 times. if they try to give you money a fourth time tell them you want to color out and leave a $20 tip for the boys. Take your chips to the cage, tip the cashier $20. At a later date blog about your experience at the craps table. Take a risk, it's only $100.

Mr. Groovington said...

One of the loves of my life was a gorgeous Norwegian alcoholic gambler. CFO of a prestigious firm by day, rabid animal by night. She took me to Vegas a few times, but mostly gambled locally. A fantastic 18 months.

Anonymous said...

What the hell is Althouse doing in Las Vegas? Has she told us and I missed it. Has she abandon all principle? Did she fly there? What is going on? My world is shattering.

wild chicken said...

Craps is the best game there. Read up on it first so you don't make the sucker bets.

I won money at craps, and it's very social.

tcrosse said...

FYI A sucker bet is defined as one whose payoff is nowhere near its true odds. The casinos are full of these.

pacwest said...

Craps has the best odds (something under 1% in the house's favor if you bet intellegently). I hate those craps machines. I didn't realize they had invaded the Las Vegas scene.

tcrosse said...

Craps has the best odds

Love those Odds Bets.

campy said...

A lady wouldn't make little snake eyes at me
When I've got my life on this roll

Ann Althouse said...

"So, did you gamble at all, Althouse? No matter how little."

No. I continually walk by the machines (because I can't get from anywhere to anywhere without passing banks of them), but they don't call out to me. It seems like too much trouble to bother with. I am considering risking a twenty before dinner tonight. Tonight's the last night.

Ken B said...

Allegations are proof now it seems http://variety.com/2017/tv/news/the-late-show-jeremy-piven-interview-sexual-harassment-1202605653/

Does our host still follow our Abigail Williams, Ms “I am the proof”, #RoseMob?

madAsHell said...

I'm surprised someone didn't ask for you to refrain from photographing the inside of the casino.

David53 said...

Craps is an interesting game, nowhere else can you see a guy betting 10K across the board next to a guy agonizing over a $10 come bet.

Molly said...

Memorable equinox? farewell to ... Love.

Big Mike said...

Will Althouse figure out how to escape from the casino? Help her by using The Althouse Amazon Portal.

[Reaches into pocket] How much did you lose this time?

pacwest said...

"Craps is an interesting game, nowhere else can you see a guy betting 10K across the board next to a guy agonizing over a $10 come bet."

I've taken to playing the dark side (don't pass/don't come) lately. And I do agonize over those $10 bets. You talk about hate stares from the guy with a couple of hundred on the pass/come!

I'm glad I always win and never lose. I'm also always right and I never lie.

southcentralpa said...

After all the R-evolution discussion, are we sure that's not a C-rap machine ... ?

David53 said...

"You talk about hate stares from the guy with a couple of hundred on the pass/come!"

That's when I walk away because it's no longer fun. It changes the entire psychology of the game.

n.n said...

Dirty old female transgenders.

David Baker said...

There's something almost unethical about visiting Las Vegas not to gamble. Like pilfering goods and services.