Althouse: "A close mutual friend of the couple recalls Obama explaining that 'the lines are very clearly drawn. . . . If I am going out with a white woman, I have no standing here.'"

May 3, 2017

"A close mutual friend of the couple recalls Obama explaining that 'the lines are very clearly drawn. . . . If I am going out with a white woman, I have no standing here.'"

"And friends remember an awkward gathering at a summer house, where Obama and Jager engaged in a loud, messy fight on the subject for an entire afternoon. ('That’s wrong! That’s wrong! That’s not a reason,' they heard Sheila yell from their guest room, their arguments punctuated by bouts of makeup sex.) Obama cared for her, Garrow writes, 'yet he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his.'"

From "Before Michelle, Barack Obama asked another woman to marry him. Then politics got in the way/A massive new biography sheds light on the relationships, sacrifices and calculations that enabled the Obama presidency" (in The Washington Post), and article about the book that comes out next week, "Rising Star: The Making of Barack Obama."

79 comments:

George M. Spencer said...: Summary of 1,400-page biography of world leader:

Iron will; hollow core.; 5/3/17, 2:38 PM
Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...: I thought he was gay?; 5/3/17, 2:41 PM
Nonapod said...: he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his

Yea, verily. Our hero, blessed with prescience, knew well t'would be folly to swim against the tides of fate.; 5/3/17, 2:41 PM
Drago said...: AReasonableMan: "I thought he was gay?"

It's not our fault he can't make up his mind.; 5/3/17, 2:45 PM
Bay Area Guy said...: I have mixed feelings about delving into past romantic relations of married folks in their 50s. It seems a bit unfair to Michelle Obama.

Maybe, I am oversenstive. I got married at 30, and my wife was 30 too. So, we had had past relationships, but kinda made an unwritten pact to not talk about them, and be very, very, very sensitive if any current circumstances brought out ghosts from the past (weddings, funerals, and christmas parties bring out all sorts of unexpected guests!).

So, Yes, Barack Obama is a historical figure, and his entire life is fair game. But, I'm not sure it's a good idea to scrutinize or emphasize his relations with pre-Michelle girlfriends.

As always, I could be totally wrong about this.; 5/3/17, 2:46 PM
Martin said...: Yea, verily. Our hero, blessed with prescience, knew well t'would be folly to swim against the tides of HATE.

Fixed it for you.
*********************************
Further confirmation of what a despicable little worm Obama is and apparently always was.; 5/3/17, 2:46 PM
Unknown said...: Cannot get worked up about this, despite my feelings towards Obama and Michelle.

Marriages of convenience are the norm in politics; marriages of love are rare.; 5/3/17, 2:51 PM
Infinite Monkeys said...: The time for sharing history was in 2007.; 5/3/17, 2:52 PM
WisRich said...: and article about the book that comes out next week, "Rising Star: The Making of Barack Obama."

Subtitled: What the Press knew but didn't want the American people to know.; 5/3/17, 2:53 PM
Lewis Wetzel said...: '. . . yet he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his.'
What tripe!
Obama must have foreseen the Iraq War, then, because his anti-war speech in 2002 got him the speaking gig at the 2004 Dem convention, and without that, he would have remained a fairly corrupt Chicago backbencher.; 5/3/17, 2:56 PM
Drago said...: Bay Area Guy: "I have mixed feelings about delving into past romantic relations of married folks in their 50s. It seems a bit unfair to Michelle Obama"

Oh, I don't think that obambi has much to complain about after getting lefty judges to unseal Blair Hulls sealed divorce records as well as getting another lefty judge (in "lifelong republican" Chucks beloved California) to unseal the sealed Child Custody papers for Jack and Jeri Ryan.; 5/3/17, 2:56 PM
Matt Sablan said...: I'd feel a lot worse if the left hadn't decided this is how politics is played. I mean, it seems wrong to me, but hey, I lost on deciding what was considered good behavior.; 5/3/17, 2:57 PM
Bay Area Guy said...: @Drago,

yeah, that was terrible, and Jack Ryan would have been an excellent candidate, but I'd like the standard to be that folks - of either party -- don't do that.

Perhaps, I am naive.; 5/3/17, 3:00 PM
eric said...: Timed release to make us all forget he is gay.; 5/3/17, 3:05 PM
Owen said...: When do we get the book by Michelle?; 5/3/17, 3:07 PM
alan markus said...: Growing up in a small community in the 60's, it took several decades to realize the true meaning of certain relationships between some same-sex couples. Maybe some people knew, but it was not polite to even question the nature of those relationships - nobody talked about it. My pastor lived with another man - to us it just seemed like two bachelors sharing a nicer home than if they had been single. The young adults group at church was entirely singles (including the pastor) - there were several women that seemed to have shared lives together into their later years. The true nature of the pastor's relationship did not become apparent to me until he and his housemate were in their 50's, at which point the housemate up and married a woman, and the pastor (by then he was in a different career) became totally unhinged.

So, I am kind of with the younger people in regards to same sex relationships not being such a big deal. In later life I figured out the true natures of some of those relationships. And what I did not know did not hurt me or change my respect for those people. I do feel sorry for those people having to work so hard to hide the true nature of their relationships. They must of had to devote a lot of effort to suppressing their true identity.

I am sure that racial and religious differences were factors too. In fact, we knew of situations where families shunned children because of "mixed" Lutheran/Catholic marriages.; 5/3/17, 3:12 PM
Nonapod said...: he had a compulsion to orate in class and summarize other people’s arguments for them. “In law school the only thing I would have voted for Obama to do would have been to shut up,” one student told Garrow. Classmates created a Obamanometer, ranking “how pretentious someone’s remarks are in class.”

It's not surprising to hear he's pretty much always been this way.

Since Obama is no longer president, for me probably one of the biggest relief is no longer being bombarded with Obama's dreary, pretentious droning about all manner of nonsense. It was migraine inducing to here his idiotic strawman arguments on gun control and foreign policy.; 5/3/17, 3:21 PM
madAsHell said...: Can we then conclude that Obama is a racist?....or maybe just that racism is profitable?; 5/3/17, 3:26 PM
Left Bank of the Charles said...: If you read the article closely, it says that Barack asked Sheila to marry him twice, and both times she said no, the last time before he went off to Harvard Law School and she went off to Korea. How does that all get twisted around into a story that he didn't want to marry her because she being not black was going to hurt his future in politics?

If this is the same woman with whom he supposedly had the correspondence about exploring his gayness, that story now has credibility problems too.; 5/3/17, 3:31 PM
SukieTawdry said...: I'm fairly clear on why he didn't marry the white woman. I'm less certain about why he chose the perpetually aggrieved Michelle Robinson.; 5/3/17, 3:32 PM
MadisonMan said...: I think it's unseemly to delve into someone's past like this. If it had been 2007, maybe so. And a better angle on this would be Who knew this, and when did they know it, and why were they silent?

I'm not a huge fan of Michelle Obama, mostly because a lot of people think she's So Swell and I want to push back against that, but she doesn't deserve this.

I don't think history will be kind to Obama.; 5/3/17, 3:36 PM
Drago said...: Left Bank: "If this is the same woman with whom he supposedly had the correspondence about exploring his gayness, that story now has credibility problems too."

Why isn't the earlier story the basis for credibility issues for this story?; 5/3/17, 3:42 PM
Matt Sablan said...: We're probably supposed to read the whole book to understand how we reached the conclusion in the blurb.; 5/3/17, 3:44 PM
sdharms said...: gag me with a spoon!; 5/3/17, 3:46 PM
Rick said...: Bay Area Guy said...
I'd like the standard to be that folks - of either party -- don't do that

You can't control what other people do. So you only choice is to do accept a lower standard than you would prefer or accept yet another double standard which disadvantages you.; 5/3/17, 3:50 PM
readering said...: How many people will read a 1400 page book that deals almost entirely with the period before he was president? Garrow better be another Caro.; 5/3/17, 3:56 PM
I'm Full of Soup said...: Help me catch up. Was this before or after his gayness interlude?; 5/3/17, 3:57 PM
Rosalyn C. said...: She did seem a lot like his mother, an academic, anthropologist, East Asian oriented, so I can see Obama having a feeling of deep connection with her. Perhaps she said no to marrying him because she knew there was no way to reconcile his ambitions with the reality of race politics. He knew it too, but was conflicted by love and youth. That would be an interesting thought experiment, what would he have become had he married her instead. Certainly Obama would not have become president, obviously the chances are he would have become some kind of college professor.

As it was, Obama had a hard time convincing people he was an authentic black man. Marrying a darker skinned angry black woman certainly worked better.; 5/3/17, 3:58 PM
Drago said...: readering: "How many people will read a 1400 page book that deals almost entirely with the period before he was president? Garrow better be another Caro"

Nicely done.; 5/3/17, 3:59 PM
walter said...: Bay Area Guy said... I'm not sure it's a good idea to scrutinize or emphasize his relations with pre-Michelle girlfriends.
--
That door was opened with his previous biographies. Yeah..later ended up characterizing one girlfriend as a "composite" but..; 5/3/17, 4:00 PM
robother said...: "their arguments punctuated by bouts of makeup sex." A debating technique Obama sadly left behind when he went off to Harvard Law School.

But there seems no way to square this show of robust heterosexuality (at a social event no less) with the book's revelation of Obama's barely closeted gay leanings. Unless they both were faking it behind closed doors for the sake of his future political career.; 5/3/17, 4:06 PM
Bill, Republic of Texas said...: AReasonableMan said...
I thought he was gay?

Meh. He had to choose a light or dark beard. He chose a dark beard who could pass for a man in the dark.; 5/3/17, 4:09 PM
Sprezzatura said...: Did the book report assessments re the size of BHO's cock?

If black dudes have big cocks, do half black dudes have sorta big cocks?

Also, regardless of cock size, did the book determine if BHO is a minute man?

Many questions to be answered.; 5/3/17, 4:12 PM
Mr. Groovington said...: Sheila was hot. Bummer.; 5/3/17, 4:15 PM
Balfegor said...: Re: Bay Area Guy:

I have mixed feelings about delving into past romantic relations of married folks in their 50s. It seems a bit unfair to Michelle Obama.

It does, but there's a lot of people -- or someone thinks there's a lot of people -- with a creepy interest in their romance. I honestly don't understand how that movie got made. It's not like theirs is a particularly striking romance, from what I understand.

I mean, Joe Biden's marriage to his first wife, which ended in a tragic automobile accident, is the kind of thing I can kind of imagine making a movie out of -- you could extract a narrative arc out of that, even if its the kind of arc that progressives would call "problematic." There's . . . some kind of story about Mitch Daniels' marriage that honestly sounds like it would be fascinating, although no one knows what that story is. A movie about Trump's marriage(s) would at least be full of interest since they're full of sleaze and adultery and rich people going bankrupt and hurt, angry children, and all the things that make a good soap opera. The only ingredients missing are amnesia and someone dying of a terminal illness.

But Obama? They're a pair of yuppies with posh Ivy league degrees, who met in an office, and got married. They had two children; neither is known to have wandered in any way since marrying. The only way it could be more humdrum and boring is if it had been arranged by their parents.

Given that, the fact that a movie about their first date was filmed kind of gives me the willies, frankly.; 5/3/17, 4:17 PM
mockturtle said...: 'yet he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his.'

Good grief! Reads like some bad romance novel [Is there a good romance novel?]. As Dorothy Parker would say of it, "This is not a book to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force!"; 5/3/17, 4:17 PM
walter said...: Jelly,
It's a composite.; 5/3/17, 4:18 PM
mockturtle said...: PB: You are sorely lacking in Laslo's éclat. Best to leave such matters alone.; 5/3/17, 4:21 PM
James K said...: But, I'm not sure it's a good idea to scrutinize or emphasize his relations with pre-Michelle girlfriends.

As they say in court, the defense opened the door, in this case with Barry's phony Dreams From my Father and that "Her voice sounded like a wind chime" nonsense about an alleged girlfriend.; 5/3/17, 4:29 PM
Sprezzatura said...: Mock,

Sure, not to mention that I'm not experienced w/ melanin rich dudes and size.; 5/3/17, 4:29 PM
tcrosse said...: he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his

A rip-off of Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson. Too bad O didn't choose as David Windsor did.; 5/3/17, 4:36 PM
The Godfather said...: I will never read a 1,400 page book about Obama -- Hell, if Readers Digest put out a 140 page version, I wouldn't read it. Without ever knowing about a specific white girl friend, I always thought it was obvious that once Obama made the decision to "identify" as black, because he was never going to have a successful political career as anything other than black, he had to marry a black woman. Michelle seems like a suitable choice -- not the only possibility I assume, but she worked out well for his political purposes. She may have been his best political decision.; 5/3/17, 4:36 PM
Sprezzatura said...: BTW mock,

I also thought that quote was funny.

Obviously this info isn't coming from the BHO side of the situation. Real players are so good at ditchin' gals that they end up feeling sorry for us.; 5/3/17, 4:38 PM
Yancey Ward said...: It is interesting to think about the counterfactual where Jager agreed to marry him. If you held the rest of his life constant- for example, moving to Chicago and running for office there- would he have ever won office with a white wife? And it isn't just that it might turn off some of the white voters who ended up voting for him for Senate and President, but it also would have cost him some support among African-Americans, especially women.

However, I don't believe the story for the most part- I think it clear he asked her to marry him and she told him no. Why she chose that, who knows?; 5/3/17, 4:40 PM
Gahrie said...: would he have ever won office with a white wife?

Depends...if he ran as a Republican sure...if he ran as a Democrat, not so much.; 5/3/17, 4:44 PM
walter said...: Riptide!; 5/3/17, 4:47 PM
Sprezzatura said...: Oh, YW indicates that BHO wasn't the one using clever words to ditch the gal. But, it was the gal ditchin' him.

Anywho, my bad.

If I at all cared I would have read the link, which I'd already ignored when it showed up at NYT earlier.

Anywho, maybe BHO ain't no player. That makes sense, he seems sorta nerdy.; 5/3/17, 4:52 PM
Hammond X. Gritzkofe said...: "...yet he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his."

Save it for the next Bulwer-Lytton submission.; 5/3/17, 4:54 PM
mockturtle said...: Depends...if he ran as a Republican sure...if he ran as a Democrat, not so much.

He would have lost the black female vote 'bigly'.; 5/3/17, 4:54 PM
Balfegor said...: Re: The Godfather:

I always thought it was obvious that once Obama made the decision to "identify" as black, because he was never going to have a successful political career as anything other than black, he had to marry a black woman.

There's a whiff of trans-racialism about his decision to identify as African American given that there were approximately 0 points of intersection between any African American community and the cultural milieu in which he was raised. Maybe he saw some African Americans on the television. Sure, he looks Black, so some people interacted with him as though he were African American, but I look Hispanic and some people interact with me as though I am Hispanic (I can tell because there are people who address me in Spanish and nearby White people in English). It would still be 100% fakery for me to adopt an Hispanic identity.

So I agree, he needed his Black wife and his Black church to anchor his racial identity. And, well, I guess he knew that, and went through pretty much that exact thought process. Can't have hurt that his wife came from a politically connected family, though.; 5/3/17, 4:54 PM
Sprezzatura said...: BTW,

how does this post not get the BHO boyfriend tag?

Sheesh.; 5/3/17, 4:55 PM
MadisonMan said...: Hammond X. Gr... that was a hilarious comment, and spot on.; 5/3/17, 5:02 PM
cubanbob said...: The only thing I want to know about Barack Obama is what did he know and when did he know it when it comes to Hillary's graft, criminality and treason while Secretary of State.; 5/3/17, 5:10 PM
Yancey Ward said...: Peanut Butter,

Not having read the book or even the article, just the blurb- I am inferring that his proposal was declined- not retracted. It is possible that he indicated to her that the proposal could harm his future political ambitions, and that is why she rejected him. However, I don't usually credit people with that kind of deep foresight- literally decades of it. It almost sounds to me a fabricated story told now to make her rejection seem like his own idea all along, and by his friends in this case.

Having a marriage proposal rejected is going to be harsh for a man, and not something one is happy to have known generally.; 5/3/17, 5:19 PM
Kep Hartman said...: I want to see his college transcripts. And who paid for his college.

And what Cubanbob wants: "what did he know and when did he know it when it comes to Hillary's graft, criminality and treason while Secretary of State."; 5/3/17, 5:23 PM
Sprezzatura said...: YW,

You seem to share my POV re not giving zero Fs re this.

I just wanted to quip re black cock, hoping to catch Mock's attention. [= mission accomplished]

Forced to think about this, even though I'm still too lazy and uninterested to look into the details, it is interesting to consider that simultaneously:

a) BHO asked this chick to marry him

and

b) BHO didn't want to marry this chick for political reasons

Anywho, who cares?

Answer = folks who will buy this book = not me.; 5/3/17, 5:34 PM
Sprezzatura said...: not giving any Fs, or giving zero Fs

At least I can console myself for screw-ups in this thread by focusing on Althouse's oversight re the lack of the BHO boyfriend tag.; 5/3/17, 5:39 PM
Sebastian said...: @St. George: "Summary of 1,400-page biography of world leader: Iron will; hollow core." That's why I will probably read a chunk of it. O is a remarkable character that way. I can't listen to the guy for more than 10 seconds, of course. But as an excretion of the American body politic, as a kind of negative icon, he is worth contemplating. And we aren't done with him yet, so the phony life story, the hollowness of character, the sheer instrumentalism of ruthless lefty ambition is still worth exposing.; 5/3/17, 5:57 PM
readering said...: Interesting how mixed races are identified. From what I understand, the ex-girlfriend is mixed Dutch-Japanese. But she is identified as white. Obama's mother was white, but he is identified as black.; 5/3/17, 5:58 PM
Limited blogger said...: We're just hearing about this now?; 5/3/17, 6:06 PM
mockturtle said...: My bi-racial daughter identifies as black although she is half white. Most think she is Hispanic.; 5/3/17, 6:10 PM
Michael K said...: Another book in my long list of books I won't read.

Right now I'm reading (actually listening to the audible version in the car) a book about "D-Day Through German Eyes."

Much better than anything about Obama.; 5/3/17, 6:11 PM
David said...: Now they tell us.

And guess what? If this was his calculation, he chose well with Michelle.; 5/3/17, 8:13 PM
David said...: Gahrie said...
would he have ever won office with a white wife?

Depends...if he ran as a Republican sure...if he ran as a Democrat, not so much.

Interesting thought, though perhaps almost as difficult.

Given the political influences of his mother and father, it's hard to see how he could have become a Republican.; 5/3/17, 8:18 PM
David said...: Owen said...
When do we get the book by Michelle?

It could be an all time classic, but likely won't.; 5/3/17, 8:21 PM
Karen Galle said...: Michael K,
I just finished 'Cross Channel Attack', the official US Army History (Green Books) of D-Day in concert with David Isby's 'Fighting the Invasion: The German Army at D-Day', where he edits the after war interrogations of the Kraut officers present. Very interesting to have both books open when discussing the same topic / event from different sides. Another reason never to Kindle, I often have my dining room table covered with books and maps. Now I'm on Martin Blumenson's Green Book 'Breakout and Pursuit', with Cole's 'The Lorraine Campaign' in the wings. There's some good snark in most of the volumes.; 5/3/17, 8:46 PM
Joe said...: Re: Where is Obama's gayness now?

Based on various stories that have floated around for years, Obama didn't seem to care who sucked his cock, but preferred to put it in vagina rather than anuses.; 5/3/17, 8:57 PM
Unknown said...: Lots of black men marry / date white women as a status symbol. I wonder if this is an attempt to elevate Obama from his beta male identification. The tell is the "bouts of make-up sex" tidbit.; 5/4/17, 12:03 AM
Kevin said...: So, after only a decade in the public spotlight, Obama finally has identifiable ex-girlfriends, before he met Michelle at age 28.

"How many people will read a 1400 page book that deals almost entirely with the period before he was president?"

But that is the period which is most interesting. How did a guy with such meager measures of conventional success (mediocre "community organizer", law school lecturer, mediocre state senator, undistinguished one-term US Senator), manage to get catapulted to the Presidency?

One story I hope they address is the claim that the University of Chicago Law School made him a tenure offer, with no record of publishing, which would have been an unique tenure offer for Chicago.

There continue to be a number of odd things about Obama's history - maybe the book will explain a few.; 5/4/17, 12:22 AM
Clyde said...: So. Tired. Of. Obamas.

Please, just GTF away.

You too, Hillary.; 5/4/17, 5:31 AM
Clyde said...: P.S. I didn't intend for that to be an almost-haiku. It just came out that way.; 5/4/17, 5:33 AM
Eric said...: "But there seems no way to square this show of robust heterosexuality (at a social event no less) with the book's revelation of Obama's barely closeted gay leanings"

Um, you've never met a pansexual narcissist? I assure you that this is a thing, and that Barack Obama's reported behavior fits the profile pretty exactly.; 5/4/17, 6:28 AM
Owen said...: Clyde: a worthy almost-haiku. It catches that pure emotional tone. Maybe it could be the start of a new poetic form, requiring three lines and at least one "F." We could call it the "Clyde."; 5/4/17, 6:34 AM
Wince said...: So many "cock holsters" ...you need a program just to keep 'em "straight"!; 5/4/17, 6:47 AM
AllenS said...: This is just the start of news releases to ease the problem of Barry divorcing that wretched wife, Michelle, and then taking up with a white woman or a white man.; 5/4/17, 7:14 AM
Son of Stan said...: Well, the press can keep secrets.; 5/4/17, 7:30 AM
BillyTalley said...: "Destiny".; 5/4/17, 8:29 AM
LilyBart said...: 'yet he felt trapped between the woman he loved and the destiny he knew was his.'

Sounds like a low-brow romance novel.; 5/4/17, 8:33 AM
jake said...: I agree with several of the comments left here that I won't be reading it, but I am thankful someone is much along the lines of Sebastian's comment at 5:57 PM 5/3/2017. Research much like the scientists at the CDC study infectious diseases to determine how to prevent their spread.; 5/4/17, 9:37 AM