June 28, 2014

"Colmes is like Pee Wee Herman saying 'If you love it why don't you marry it?' Except Colmes is cruder."

"And yet it was Pee Wee Herman who got arrested for masturbating in a theater. It's so unfair!"

35 comments:

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Conservatives would like to make sweet love to the constitution. Liberals want to hate-fuck it.

harrogate said...

I always detested Colmes. I wonder who exactly the demographic audience is for that guy?

Phil 314 said...

is he speaking about those recent
9-0 SCOTUS decisions?

PB said...

His tweet makes no sense. It's just ad hominem.

As liberal heads explode and their self-loathing over what they've brought about goes to 11, it's going to be entertaining.

Michael K said...

Colmes has been creepy since Hannity had him as a foil.

CatherineM said...

Oh this piece of shit. Remember when he claimed that Trig Palin wasn't Sarah Palin's kid, but her daughter's? Then that she didn't get proper pre-natal care which is why Trig has Down's? Finally that Palin was pregnant with their first when she married Todd (not sure why that would be scandalous").

Why does this guy have a career?

Skeptical Voter said...

Ol Skeletor is truly a nasty person.

Saint Croix said...

I like it when the Constitution is on top.

Saint Croix said...

Republicans whisper sweet nothings into the Constitution's ear.

Democrats are all Dirty Sanchez with the Constitution.

Saint Croix said...

So we're married to the Constitution for 200 years and the Republicans are all, "I love you!" and the Democrats are plotting to kill the wife and replace her with some skanky pre-teen they met in a bar.

Wilbur said...

Where I grew up that nonsense could get you a quick sock in the face.

He's walking on the fighting side of me.

sane_voter said...

If Colmes shows up on O'Reilly, I fast forward to teh next segment, or pause until I can fast forward.

Saint Croix said...

So we're playing a rousing game of Fuck, Marry, Kill with the Constitution. And Republicans choose marriage. Marry the Constitution! All right.

The Democrats say Fuck the Constitution. No, wait, some of the Democrats are saying Kill the Constitution. Now it's a really heated argument. Fuck the Constitution! Kill the Constitution! The Democrats are screaming at each other.

Wow, this is like a soccer game it's so exciting.

Suddenly, the Ghost of Ted Kennedy appears. "Fuck the Constitution and then kill the Constitution's babies!" All the delegates erupt in applause.

traditionalguy said...

Dems he speaks for no longer keep the Covenant of 1887, as amended. So Colmes ridicules covenant keeping.

Many summed up Obama as a Lawless man back in 2009. But he kept up a pretense until his time left to destroy the USA is close to being over.

As Matt Drudge said, there are going to be hot times in DC this summer as Obama dares the Americans to stop him. Sarajevo in 1914 triggered many carefully laid out plans, and Obama's plans are on hair trigger this summer.

Anonymous said...

Saint Croix, I can't even add to that. Fine work.

Hagar said...

I wish Roger Ailes would get some more intelligent people to hold up the Democrat side of "fair and balanced."

Bob Boyd said...

"And yet it was Pee Wee Herman who got arrested for masturbating in a theater."

Not likely to happen to Colmes. He's become so unattractive his hand has a headache.

Paul Kirchner said...

Like previous commenters, I wonder who Alan Colmes appeals to. Is Fox News sneakily employing a liberal spokesman who is so repellent that he undermines whatever position he takes?

Every time Colmes appears on Fox, they mention that he's the author of "Thank the Liberals--For Saving America." That's great publicity, something any author would dream of. So how's the book doing?

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,005,534 in Books

Unbelievably badly.

donald said...

Colmes is a cunt. I'm sure he and Mike Malloy have jizzed on each other's faces.

Saint Croix said...

Saint Croix, I can't even add to that. Fine work

thank you!

apropos of nothing, I have just discovered Sprite Zero. It is amazing. Add some liquor and you have a hell of a diet.

Saint Croix said...

The Constitution's armed and she likes her privacy.

And she's a moaner. She grunts like that woman who used to play tennis. Really loud jurisprudential grunts. "Due process, due process, due process." Not to brag, but she's orgasmic for due process.

"A jury is 12 people!" she screams, biting my ear. "12 people, you idiots!".

Gahrie said...

I wonder who Alan Colmes appeals to

His sister in law is an anchor on Fox.

chillblaine said...

Worst Take Ever. The love that libertarian/conservatives have for the Constitution is strictly platonic. It's the progressives who want to fuck over all our functioning institutions.

sonicfrog said...

And yet it was Pee Wee Herman who got arrested for masturbating in a theater. It's so unfair!"

Hey... Pee Wee got a bum rap on that! The usher asked to see his stub!!!!

Nichevo said...

beta, it upsets me when you put yourself down. Why don't you try a sexbot Constitution rap?

Bruce Hayden said...

I always detested Colmes. I wonder who exactly the demographic audience is for that guy?

I think he still has a job at Fox because he is a foil. He, along with Carville, are the Dems/progressives that conservatives love to hate. Colmes exhibits much that is dislikeable about the left. He has a kinda whiney voice, looks like a gamma male, and is pretty well guaranteed to spout the lib talking points of the day. Completely dogmatic. I think that if they want some sympathy for a subject, they use one of their more attractive libs (though I noticed recently that Kirsten Powers appears almost speechless in some of these recent debates - indicating that at least she seems to have some qualms about the Obama excesses, which Colmes lacks).

I also wonder whether they had to give Colmes some sort of settlement for giving up his cohosting with Hannity. At least so that he didn't make a stink. And, maybe this is it - so much money per year, with so many appearances, etc.

Rusty said...

Well Allen we kind of are married to it as country. it's the supreme law of the land and its who we are as a people.
What a horrid document.One that allows everyone to exercise their rights. I can see where that would be a inconvenience to someone like Colmes.

Glen Wishard said...

So Colmes is a joke, but the open animus against the constitution that has become cool since 2008 is not at all funny.

Wince said...

But be sure to practice safe sex with the Constitution.

Parchment cuts are the worst.

Sam L. said...

Them libs is so swave and deboner; eddicated fools, I calls 'em.

Unknown said...

Lay off on Colmes, guys. He's okay. I used to listen to his radio show many years ago and he had a portion called "Radio Grafitti" where anybody could say anything in one sentecne or less. More often than not, people were insulting him and accusing him of being gay. You have to give credit to someone who has enough of a sense of humor to let that go on.

Unknown said...

Lay off on Colmes, guys. He's okay. I used to listen to his radio show many years ago and he had a portion called "Radio Grafitti" where anybody could say anything in one sentecne or less. More often than not, people were insulting him and accusing him of being gay. You have to give credit to someone who has enough of a sense of humor to let that go on.

Victor Erimita said...

Colmes's gig is making these ridiculous statements so Fox or whoever will pay attention to him. If he were not an object of conservative ridicule, he would have no job.

Ray said...

Where I grew up that nonsense could get you a quick sock in the face.

He's walking on the fighting side of me.


Maybe that's why Old Screwface looks like that.

stlcdr said...

Saint Croix said...
So we're married to the Constitution for 200 years and the Republicans are all, "I love you!" and the Democrats are plotting to kill the wife and replace her with some skanky pre-teen they met in a bar.

6/28/14, 7:06 PM


Worth repeating. That's some funny s**t right there.