Althouse: At Marley's Café...

October 30, 2013

At Marley's Café...

... we don't want the top post to be about cats.

22 comments:

Hagar said...: Some people do terrible things to their pets.; 10/30/13, 11:13 AM
Michelle Dulak Thomson said...: But ... but ... yesterday was National Cat Day!; 10/30/13, 11:15 AM
Big Mike said...: That's not Marley. Marley was a yellow Lab.; 10/30/13, 11:32 AM
BuckIV said...: You get the best looking beasts at your dog place.; 10/30/13, 12:04 PM
MadisonMan said...: Cats are wonderful heaters this time of year. Dogs are just smelly.

I say that as someone with a cat and a dog in the house.; 10/30/13, 12:15 PM
Carnifex said...: Okay this won't be the top post then...while traveling through town the other day wife saw a kitteh sitting by the courthouse. She jammed on the brakes, holding up traffic and orders me to go get it before it gets run over. I get out walk towards the kitteh and it dashes away...Ohh welll. Get back in the car and proceed.

We get 4 miles down the road and she turns around. "You're gonna catch me that kitten" I am informed. Oh well indeed.

Get to the courthouse and he's back in the same spot. So I meander slowly over to where he is sitting, looking at everything but him.(if you make eye contact with a hunted animal, they know they are being hunted. If you act like you don;t see them, they'll will just hunker down and try hiding in plain sight).

So I get within a couple of feet of him and he dashes off again, but just to the nearest bush. So I take out my secret weapon, a bologna sandwich with mayo, tear off a little piece and underhand it towards the kitteh.

He jumps back a bit, but watches me take a bite, so he comes nosing out, anf eats the first bit. Some mayo had gotten on some bark, and he was so hungry he ate the bark too. Another toss, a little closer, and another, and now he's in arm reach...GOTCHA!!!!

Many people don't realize that grabbing a wild kitten is akin to sticking your hand into a blender, with the only difference being you can turn the blender off. Lucky I work with my hands so it doesn't really bother me.

Anyway, get him home, and he's a she. Granddaughter names it Bella after the twilight character. And upon washing and further examination, she is a he again. So I christen him Barnabas, as in the Dark Shadows. Barney for short.

So that's how we got the new kitteh!!; 10/30/13, 12:17 PM
MadisonMan said...: That's a sweet story Carnifex.; 10/30/13, 12:21 PM
lemondog said...: @Carnifex, well done. Your wife gets 2 thumbs as well as you as the successful hunter.

Happy homecoming to he/she/he -Belle/Barney; 10/30/13, 12:49 PM
jacksonjay said...: Carnifex just got his man card revoked! And not for kitten rescue!; 10/30/13, 12:49 PM
jacksonjay said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 10/30/13, 12:52 PM
mccullough said...: Interesting tail on that dog.; 10/30/13, 2:00 PM
rcocean said...: "Cats are wonderful heaters this time of year."

They just radiate heat. A couple of cats give off more heat then Mrs. RC.; 10/30/13, 3:08 PM
rhhardin said...: Amazon has a garbage interest profile program.

It offers me stuff selected by the most unlikely connections. Weird stuff.

A collection of six rubber hose washers, just now.

What produced that?

Maybe a O-ring bought years ago to act as a tire on a pulley converted to a patio door roller. Or not.

No interest whatever in hoses has been expressed.; 10/30/13, 3:09 PM
Michael K said...: On cat she vs he. When I was living in New Hampshire, two little girls came by and asked if I would like kitten. I aid OK and they came back with a black kitten that my daughter named "Belle," after the little mermaid. It was a six toed cat which are common in New England. I went on a business trip when the cat was older only to find on my return that the car was "Bill." He had sprayed the house with his musky pee.

Well, he went to the vet and became "it." He became a big cat and was a great cat. He got along with my golden retriever and they would eat from the same dish at the same time. I started feeding him in the basement so the dog wouldn't eat his food. When he was hungry, he would grab my legs if I walked by the basement door.

He hated the car so I couldn't take him back to California when I returned after a year. I gave him to two friends who were moving to Connecticut. They had him for years after. He would hunt rabbits and bring them a treat.; 10/30/13, 3:11 PM
Michael K said...: Preview would help the spelling.; 10/30/13, 3:12 PM
Anonymous said...: Is this an appropriate place to say that President Obama is a lying sack?; 10/30/13, 5:51 PM
Megaera said...: I had flown into Little Rock, Arkansas once to try a case in Federal Court there, and was walking downtown during a lunch break when I suddenly felt like I'd run my leg into some barbed wire -- looked down and there was a panicked kitten climbing up my hose like an animated burr. Nothing but concrete and asphalt in every direction, no passerby willing to explain where this kitten had come from, and I could either dump it back on the street or figure out what to do with it in less than 35 minutes, when court resumed.
Tried the Courthouse, just to see if the clerk would find somewhere to keep him, but the guard wouldn't even let me bring him in through the scanner ("Service animals only, Ma'am") so in desperation I went over to a fleabag hotel across the street and tried to rent him a room for the afternoon. God love the woman at the desk, she was having none of that, rounded up a box and told me she'd keep him behind the counter til Court adjourned. Had just time to change into my emergency replacement hose, too.
Spent some time trying to figure where I was going to get a cat carrier, and how I was going to get all my stuff, plus the kitten, on the plane back ... and when I got back to the hotel the desk clerk pleaded with me to leave the kitten with her, said she'd already named him "Streeter" after her great-uncle. How could I resist that? I did miss the kitten, though, although I suspect my own two cats would not have been the least bit happy about an interloper. So, happy ending all round.; 10/30/13, 8:50 PM
Carnifex said...: @Jacksonjay

Ah well. Most men being assholes, it doesn't bother me to have mine revoked. Someone else will come along directly and give me another.

Have fun as a bachelor.; 10/30/13, 10:06 PM
Freeman Hunt said...: Rh, they also have what I assume is the same program on their gift finder. It suggested that my mother-in-law might like a copy of The Book of Mormon or the Qur'an for her birthday, and, if not those, a high school biology textbook.; 10/30/13, 11:32 PM
Carnifex said...: So Freeman...how long HAS your mother-in-law practiced apostasy?; 10/31/13, 1:02 AM
jacksonjay said...: Dear Carnifex,

A long time ago, my new BRIDE was overheard telling a friend that she would send jacksonjay with an item that needed to be delivered. The bride and I had a short and sweet discussion about "ordering" a spouse to do something. Thirty years later, jacksonjay and pamelakay are still happily married and we "ask" each other for favors!

A few years ago a beloved cousin was eulogized by the pastor with a "cute" story about how he followed Betty around like a puppy dog! How very sad! Betty told Val what to do and when to do it! That's how everyone knew Val!

Signed,

Asshole with manhood intact and three grown daughters who adore their Daddy!; 10/31/13, 1:16 AM
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