In my family there wasn't really a middle child. There were three children and two were always allied against the third - but the "two" changed about every six months.
And there was hell to pay for everyone when the outsider was the eldest of the three.
The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with. The oldest gets too bossy from always being told to look after and be responsible for the younger ones, and the youngest is the baby and spoiled rotten.
My mom is one of 13. She had a brother who was the middle of a group of three boys, and also the middle of all 13. She thought it affected him. I wonder how anyone could tell, with that many children in a house without running water.
Don't let the oppression of orderism call your destiny. If you work the fine art of passing blame, and taking credit, you can still be the favorite child, and it's a skill that can take you right to the top in life.
The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with.
No, the middle child just develops very good skills as a sociopath, and waits until the opportunity is right to set out to screw over the youngest child.
I've seen that look on every one of my children's faces. I'm not sure it's a middle child look. Too bad we all have to realize we're not the center of the universe at some point.
The reasons are mostly unknown, but it is undeniable that the middle child is superior in every way. One of the clear indicators of this is that only the middle child is capable of seeing this fact.
I'm 13 months exactly behind #1, and even though it wss another 4 years before there was a #3 (out of 5 total), I never felt like the youngest, as #1 and I had a solidarity pact against our parents. I was a part of a team of two.
And we sure didn't appreciate #3 coming along. It was an intrusion into our folie à deux. By the time #4 & 5 came along, meh, who cared. But we were pretty mean to #3.
He's now 6'4". Fortunately, he doesn't seem to hold a grudge. At least, it's not evident --- yet.
Until 2 very later siblings came along I was the middle child for a number of years. I can state with absolute certainty, having had an eldest brother and having seen oldest brothers and sisters in action -- that the oldest child is a big poopyhead.
I'm the middle of 3, as is my wife. Our obvious superiority goes without saying...
Seriously, I think there is something to the idea of the advantage of balance in seeing your younger sibling coddled and your older sibling being bossy.
Hagar said, The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with.
I'm the fifth of seven. It's a big middle. I'm the youngest of the middle and oldest of the youngest. I'm unbelievably well adjusted, reasonable, and easy to get along with.
My second oldest sister was very big on birth order books for a while. At least she recommended one or two to the rest of us. But then I read somewhere that birth order psychology is all bunk. I wish I could remember where I read that so I could look it up.
Middle, middle. Sorry for the lack of actual added content to the thread, but this is mainly an attempt to get signed into Google from the UK, which has been problematic, so far.
My father-in-law was the youngest in a large family. They grew up extremely poor. All seem to have turned out well. All are different; there are business people, missionaries, a chemistry professor, etc. I like the family reunions with all of them.
I was one of seven children, middle brother (five) with an older sister and a younger sister. No such thing as middle child syndrome in a family that big.
I was one of seven children, middle brother (five) with an older sister and a younger sister. No such thing as middle child syndrome in a family that big.
The oldest can feel sorry for himself because he is always expected to be more mature than he is. The youngest can feel sorry for himself because he is always treated like a baby. The middle one can have a real self-pity party, because it works against him both ways: never in charge, never indulged.
Until they learn to emprace their condition and exploit it. The oldest learns that he should always be in charge. The youngest learns he should always expect to be treated as special, and somehow it works. The middle learns how to negotiate.
I have two older siblings and two younger siblings. I've pretty much gone through as an also ran. My mother had three baby boys in three and half years, my oldest brother is three and half years older than me, I'm three and half years older than my sister and my youngest brother is almost thirteen years younger than me.
My wife is the middle of five girls and, for better for for worse, the "standard" stereotypes apply. Her oldest sister was "brilliant", "talented", "full of potential" and constantly responsible for raising her sisters due to the absentee parenting of their granola-munching ex-hippie mom and dad. Oh...and the oldest is nuts and hands-down one of the worst people I know in just about every facet.
The second-oldest reacted to the excesses of the oldest and the depredations of the parents by going full-metal-bible thumper and combined that with an unrelenting need to succeed; married an already rich eye surgeon, got her own MD and then stayed home with the kids. Insufferable to be around.
My wife is right in the middle.
The next-youngest flunked out of college, also went full-metal-bible, but constantly lives beyond her means. She lives in a nice one-bedroom flat with a husband, two daughters and is due to pop with the third any day now. If you're still bouncing checks on a regular in your 30's, something's amiss.
The youngest, born after the mom became a doctor and the father inherited his father's kitchen/bath business, was spoiled rotten and, having just graduated college is traveling extensively. Given the flotsam that she's dated, there's evidence that she's tending toward abusive relationships, though there's zero evidence of that in her family or her extended family.
Again...my wife...dead middle...absolutely normal, even-headed, mature, and an incredible mother.
The oldest child tends to be the most successful and have the best longevity. Which is understandable when you consider that they had the undivided attention of their parents for at least a little while. Plus, while in most families the other children are loved, it is still a situation of been there done that regarding all the others and growing up the oldest child always has a hierarchical advantage.
The oldest child tends to be the most successful and have the best longevity. Which is understandable when you consider that they had the undivided attention of their parents for at least a little while.
When the first daughter was born, I would sit in the bathroom when she took a bath until she was about four. Two or three for the second daughter. With my son, who's three, I go do something else and listen for splashes.
Being the youngest child especially if the youngest is a lot younger than the other siblings causes the youngest to become a more likable charming person from recieving loving attention from older siblings and by developing the ability to please their older siblings. I've observe this with my youngest brother and my youngest uncle who was also a much younger child.
Number two of four. My sisters are much younger, one by about eight years and the other by thirteen. I loved my little sisters, but I hated my older brother who was a swaggering jerk that lived to torture me.
I have two girls who are nine years apart. Both their personalities are that of only children.
I’m youngest of 2 but because of a screwy upbringing can’t really relate to birth order. However, my niece has 2 girls ages 10 and 7, because of certain issues, with most of her discussion centering on the 10 year old. Both girls are keenly intelligent but I think the youngest is more adaptive and a more free thinker, partly the result of her having had to find inventive ways of garnering her share of the attention.
I’ve told my niece that the youngest will be the one to tell her to f**k off.
Middle siblings tend to succeed in life by finding one of many useful social roles outside the family system that has restricted by rewards the oldest as the Responsible Good one and the youngest as a Wild and Crazy bad one.
Middle siblings can be normal after they get over the ignored stage.
That picture is awesome. Being the baby of the family is no longer an option. He is now plotting and formulating a plan to remedy that circumstance. You can see it in his eyes. This means war.
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48 comments:
In my case, there's only my sister, but Ann's always given the impression her parents were quite progressive, so I have a feeling she missed this one.
In my family there wasn't really a middle child. There were three children and two were always allied against the third - but the "two" changed about every six months.
And there was hell to pay for everyone when the outsider was the eldest of the three.
Yep.
I'm number two out of three.
All guys, all 15 months apart.
My mother was 4'10 all of us boys surpassed her height by the time we were 9 or ten.
The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with.
The oldest gets too bossy from always being told to look after and be responsible for the younger ones, and the youngest is the baby and spoiled rotten.
My mom is one of 13. She had a brother who was the middle of a group of three boys, and also the middle of all 13. She thought it affected him. I wonder how anyone could tell, with that many children in a house without running water.
Don't let the oppression of orderism call your destiny. If you work the fine art of passing blame, and taking credit, you can still be the favorite child, and it's a skill that can take you right to the top in life.
I was a middle child and my dad was a middle husband. I came out of it much better than he did.
The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with.
No, the middle child just develops very good skills as a sociopath, and waits until the opportunity is right to set out to screw over the youngest child.
I've seen that look on every one of my children's faces. I'm not sure it's a middle child look.
Too bad we all have to realize we're not the center of the universe at some point.
I am the baby in the family and the fave.
My sis who is the middle child is constantly pissed.
My parents dislike her too.
tits and thanks.
The reasons are mostly unknown, but it is undeniable that the middle child is superior in every way. One of the clear indicators of this is that only the middle child is capable of seeing this fact.
Middle children are called the "spirited child". When they are young they look up and see privilege, they look down they see coddling.
I'm one of two middle children, we were the troublemakers.
I'm 13 months exactly behind #1, and even though it wss another 4 years before there was a #3 (out of 5 total), I never felt like the youngest, as #1 and I had a solidarity pact against our parents. I was a part of a team of two.
And we sure didn't appreciate #3 coming along. It was an intrusion into our folie à deux. By the time #4 & 5 came along, meh, who cared. But we were pretty mean to #3.
He's now 6'4". Fortunately, he doesn't seem to hold a grudge. At least, it's not evident --- yet.
I am Eight Years Behind My Sister. I Ate My Twin In the Womb. Anything That I say That is Funny I Credit to Him.
Until 2 very later siblings came along I was the middle child for a number of years. I can state with absolute certainty, having had an eldest brother and having seen oldest brothers and sisters in action -- that the oldest child is a big poopyhead.
One of my closet friends is one of 13 children. --Huge Irish Catholic family.
She's right in there in the middle somewhere.
I am the oldest of four boys.
When #3 was born, my #2 brother went to my mom and said, "I get to be the boss of [#3], right? Kirk doesn't get to be the boss of [#3]!"
But actually it didn't work out that way. :-) Sorry, guys.
I'm the middle of 3, as is my wife. Our obvious superiority goes without saying...
Seriously, I think there is something to the idea of the advantage of balance in seeing your younger sibling coddled and your older sibling being bossy.
Scarlett Johansson Boyfriend Robot says:
I was the Middle Child between A Miscarriage and an Abortion. Scarlett Understands This,
Hagar said, The middle child tends to be the best adjusted, most reasonable, and easier to get along with.
I'm the fifth of seven. It's a big middle. I'm the youngest of the middle and oldest of the youngest. I'm unbelievably well adjusted, reasonable, and easy to get along with.
My second oldest sister was very big on birth order books for a while. At least she recommended one or two to the rest of us. But then I read somewhere that birth order psychology is all bunk. I wish I could remember where I read that so I could look it up.
I was the second child, but because my older brother was 6+ years older, it really didn't count.
My youngest brother, born 6+ years after me, didn't run into the problem either.
THAT'S MY FREEKING COUSIN SHOW SOME DAM RESPECT!
Oops. Wrong Thread. Sorry.
Oops. Wrong Google Account. Sorry.
I am a first-born and my husband is a first-born. Our son is an only as well as a first-born.
Middle, middle. Sorry for the lack of actual added content to the thread, but this is mainly an attempt to get signed into Google from the UK, which has been problematic, so far.
Middle child = cruel neutrality?
I'm a middle, and that equation speaks to me.
My father-in-law was the youngest in a large family. They grew up extremely poor. All seem to have turned out well. All are different; there are business people, missionaries, a chemistry professor, etc. I like the family reunions with all of them.
I don't put any stock into birth order.
My wife's mom was 13th out of 14 kids.
Does that count as middle?
Or are all bets off after 5 or 6?
I was one of seven children, middle brother (five) with an older sister and a younger sister. No such thing as middle child syndrome in a family that big.
I was one of seven children, middle brother (five) with an older sister and a younger sister. No such thing as middle child syndrome in a family that big.
Our middle daughter was very upset when her baby sister was born. She wanted a brother.
I think it was more than being the middle child, it was being the middle daughter.
She (24 now) howled when I showed her this photo! "Ain't nobody got time for dat!"
My wife, a middle chile, got a big laugh out of this.
She knows that she is my very last wife, so that helps.
The oldest can feel sorry for himself because he is always expected to be more mature than he is. The youngest can feel sorry for himself because he is always treated like a baby. The middle one can have a real self-pity party, because it works against him both ways: never in charge, never indulged.
Until they learn to emprace their condition and exploit it. The oldest learns that he should always be in charge. The youngest learns he should always expect to be treated as special, and somehow it works. The middle learns how to negotiate.
Third of five.
I have two older siblings and two younger siblings. I've pretty much gone through as an also ran. My mother had three baby boys in three and half years, my oldest brother is three and half years older than me, I'm three and half years older than my sister and my youngest brother is almost thirteen years younger than me.
The role seeking of small children in a family group leaves the middle child without a purpose.
The oldest is given the jobs of what is needed done. The youngest is assigned entertainer.
The middle child has to look outside the group for a role to play.
My wife is the middle of five girls and, for better for for worse, the "standard" stereotypes apply. Her oldest sister was "brilliant", "talented", "full of potential" and constantly responsible for raising her sisters due to the absentee parenting of their granola-munching ex-hippie mom and dad. Oh...and the oldest is nuts and hands-down one of the worst people I know in just about every facet.
The second-oldest reacted to the excesses of the oldest and the depredations of the parents by going full-metal-bible thumper and combined that with an unrelenting need to succeed; married an already rich eye surgeon, got her own MD and then stayed home with the kids. Insufferable to be around.
My wife is right in the middle.
The next-youngest flunked out of college, also went full-metal-bible, but constantly lives beyond her means. She lives in a nice one-bedroom flat with a husband, two daughters and is due to pop with the third any day now. If you're still bouncing checks on a regular in your 30's, something's amiss.
The youngest, born after the mom became a doctor and the father inherited his father's kitchen/bath business, was spoiled rotten and, having just graduated college is traveling extensively. Given the flotsam that she's dated, there's evidence that she's tending toward abusive relationships, though there's zero evidence of that in her family or her extended family.
Again...my wife...dead middle...absolutely normal, even-headed, mature, and an incredible mother.
The oldest child tends to be the most successful and have the best longevity. Which is understandable when you consider that they had the undivided attention of their parents for at least a little while. Plus, while in most families the other children are loved, it is still a situation of been there done that regarding all the others and growing up the oldest child always has a hierarchical advantage.
The oldest child tends to be the most successful and have the best longevity. Which is understandable when you consider that they had the undivided attention of their parents for at least a little while.
When the first daughter was born, I would sit in the bathroom when she took a bath until she was about four. Two or three for the second daughter. With my son, who's three, I go do something else and listen for splashes.
Being the youngest child especially if the youngest is a lot younger than the other siblings causes the youngest to become a more likable charming person from recieving loving attention from older siblings and by developing the ability to please their older siblings. I've observe this with my youngest brother and my youngest uncle who was also a much younger child.
Number two of four. My sisters are much younger, one by about eight years and the other by thirteen. I loved my little sisters, but I hated my older brother who was a swaggering jerk that lived to torture me.
I have two girls who are nine years apart. Both their personalities are that of only children.
The only recollection I had regarding my younger sister was the disappointment associated with not getting a little brother.
In any case, there were four of us, so there were two middle kids and we formed a majority since there was only one oldest and one baby of the family.
All fascinating comments
I’m youngest of 2 but because of a screwy upbringing can’t really relate to birth order. However, my niece has 2 girls ages 10 and 7, because of certain issues, with most of her discussion centering on the 10 year old. Both girls are keenly intelligent but I think the youngest is more adaptive and a more free thinker, partly the result of her having had to find inventive ways of garnering her share of the attention.
I’ve told my niece that the youngest will be the one to tell her to f**k off.
Middle siblings tend to succeed in life by finding one of many useful social roles outside the family system that has restricted by rewards the oldest as the Responsible Good one and the youngest as a Wild and Crazy bad one.
Middle siblings can be normal after they get over the ignored stage.
That picture is awesome. Being the baby of the family is no longer an option. He is now plotting and formulating a plan to remedy that circumstance. You can see it in his eyes. This means war.
I was for 10 years until my sister was born. However, i was the only girl.Power!
Vicki from Pasadena
I'm the eldest. Totally relating to the expression of contentment on the oldest kid's face. Now we will share the blame, grasshopper!
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