"I realised one day, as I gazed out on the treetops outside the bedroom of our little cottage, that the usual post-coital rush of a sense of vitality infusing the world, of delight with myself and with all around me, and of creative energy rushing through everything alive, was no longer following the physical pleasure."Something is infusing my world right now, I'll tell you that.
"I felt I was losing somehow, what made me a woman, and that I could not face living in this condition for the rest of my life."May I suggest wearing earth-toned clothing? Oh... no... I see... you found the solution in surgery.
[New York gynaecologist Dr Deborah] Coady told her it could be a problem with the pelvic nerve - her area of expertise - being compressed and [causing] numbness....Yes, once again we learn that we women are so fabulously multidimensional and men are so simple. So let me tell it to you straight: Cough up the tax money to pay for the fancy diagnostics of our neural misalignments and the surgery to reconnect us so we can have "the ‘blended’ clitoral and vaginal orgasms" that will return women to "the sense of deep emotional union, of post-coital creative euphoria, of joy with oneself and one’s lover… and the sense that all was well in some existential way, that [Naomi Wolf] thought [she] had lost for ever." And don't be raising any of your war-on-women objections.
She was referred to Dr Jeffrey Cole, an expert in muscular-skeletal medicine who x-rayed her back and found a crumbling of her vertebrae, even though she had never experienced pain or back problems....
Dr Cole told her: ‘All women’s wiring is different. That’s the reason women respond so differently from one another sexually. The pelvic nerve branches in very individual ways for every woman. These differences are physical’.
He added that men’s sexual wiring is much more uniform.
Of course, she has a new book. It's called "Vagina: A New Biography."
Is it really the story of her vagina? Seems more like the story of a few of her vertebrae. But it's all connected. Elaborately. Complexly. Mysteriously. Now, shut up while I gaze upon the treetops outside the bedroom of my little cottage and contemplate the extent of my euphoria.
ADDED: She's writing the kind of claptrap that feminists used to quote for the purpose of mockery.
IN THE COMMENTS: In Wolf's cogitations, Scott Bradford hears something familiar: "I first became aware of it, Mandrake during the physical act of love.... Yes, a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily, I was able to interpret these feelings correctly."
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115 comments:
All I can imagine is her lover thinking, "for the love of god, please shut up."
Women are wired to accommodate soap opera.
I can't imagine voluntarily having intercourse with her.
Readers of The New York Times (who are very smart) will buy this mewling idiot's book and have earnest discussions about it.
I am so tired of modern women writing about their vaginas (and others') for everyone.
Imagine the discussion if some guy wrote "Penis: A New Biography"
Hey y'all ... keep your vajayjay to yourselves.
We don't care and you look crass. (Boundary issues here?)
_Vagina: A New Biography_ needs a "Look Inside" link on Amazon.
It's simply impossible to have an adult, frank, mature conversation with liberals about anything having to do with vaginas.
The only thing Naomi has never been connected to is a brain.
It's called "Vagina: A New Biography."
I'm writing a new book as well, it's called:
"Dick: Coming Soon"
I was going to subtitle it "Works Every Time," but I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings,...
I read suit like this and my knee jerk reaction is almost totally chauvinistic. I suspect that ti's is one of her goals. It's like feminist trolling. I'm so glad to be a man with my one dimensional orgasm.
DEEBEE basically said what I was thinking - the only thing that's numb is her brain.
Who's afraid of Vagina Wolf?
She's a beautiful, intelligent, talented, creative human.
Then, in the index, a "Surprise Me" selection.
LL, She probably pays for it.
It's funny that contemporary "feminism" has cultivated this image of women as obsessive twat-starers. That's fine, dears, you just sit there and gaze out on the treetops outside the bedroom of your little cottage, in your post-coital rush of a sense of vitality infusing the world, delighted with yourself, while the men make the world work and send robots to Mars.
Isn't this air-headed, earth-bound, phony-mystical, self-absorbed image what women were, ostensibly, trying to flee?
Pussy Riot, Vagina Monologues, and so on. Naomi always catches trends just as they fade.
And to think that my most common post-orgasmic thought is "Goddammit! Where's the kleenex?"
I feel so cheated now...
Well, next time I see my neurologist, I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind, let me tell you!
Something tells me Naomi has a huge HUGE vagina.
*makes big "V" sign using both hands. BOTH hands.*
Am I the only one who thought of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1KvgtEnABY
"I first became aware of it, Mandrake during the physical act of love.... Yes, a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily, I was able to interpret these feelings correctly."
Something tells me Naomi has a huge HUGE vagina.
Live in a glass house?
Some day a man by the name of Bill will write the book --
Choices: The Penis or the Cigar
Women are loved for they are.
Men are loved for what they do.
Didn't Naomi once state that 150,000 women were dying every year from anorexia (that's what Wikipedia says). Maybe her systems were on the fritz when she wrote that.
antiphone said...
"Live in a glass house?
Why, yes, as a matter of fact I do live in a glass house.
But what's your point? It's not like I have a huge glass vagina.
Do we know the reason for the crumbling of Ms. Wolf's vertebrae? My conjecture is that this is a long term consequence of carrying around the mantle of moral superiority as she has done lo these many years. Must get heavy after a while...
Wonder what sort of gorilla-pounding she's been receiving that is capable of crumbling her vertabrae?
I guess I'm a little skeptical that back surgery is so advanced these days that they can just move your vertebrae around a bit and achieve the desired effect on the precise nerve that runs to your feminine pleasure centers. Seems very junk-sciency. Probably a placebo effect more than anything else.
Bob said...
"Wonder what sort of gorilla-pounding she's been receiving that is capable of crumbling her vertabrae?"
I'm guessing, "none."
I'm also guessing her "lover's" name is "Hitachi Magic Wand."
Sometimes, I feel sorry for abused tools.
Sounds like a bullshit surgery. I hope it doesn't hurt her.
Like vacations, no one wants to hear about your euphorias.
She was born in 1962 and it's much more likely she's going through menopause than any of this nerve bullshit.
Same planet, different world. How come I seem to know so many normal people who don't sit around contemplating or writing about their crotches all day?
Bob, the ever literal-minded, lol
Full-flavor women have better orgasms.
Perhaps Wolf should stop thinking about moronic theories and just enjoy the orgasm once in a while.
It's not her thought process blows people away.
There's the reason why it was called "hysteria."
From our most trusted source, wiki:
For at least two thousand years of European history until the late nineteenth century hysteria referred to a medical condition thought to be particular to women and caused by disturbances of the uterus (from the Greek ὑστέρα "hystera" = uterus), such as when a neonate emerges from the female birth canal. The origin of the term hysteria is commonly attributed to Hippocrates, even though the term isn't used in the writings that are collectively known as the Hippocratic corpus.[1] The Hippocratic corpus refers to a variety of illness symptoms, such as suffocation and Heracles' disease, that were supposedly caused by the movement of a woman's uterus to various locations within her body as it became light and dry due to a lack of bodily fluids.[1] One passage recommends pregnancy to cure such symptoms, ostensibly because intercourse will "moisten" the womb and facilitate blood circulation within the body.[1] The "wandering womb" theory persisted in European medicine for centuries.
By the mid to late 19th century, hysteria (or sometimes female hysteria) came to refer to what is today generally considered to be sexual dysfunction.[2] Typical treatment was massage of the patient's genitalia by the physician and, later, by vibrators or water sprays to cause orgasm.[2]
Though I could go with deborah's menopause. That'll work.
Think Naomi will age well?
Sounds like she needs to consult Al Gore on the best way to clear her chakra.
Professor -- thanks for doing away with the captcha.
Hope you aren't being spammed too much. Seems our Chinese spammers are absent at the moment.
"She was born in 1962 and it's much more likely she's going through menopause than any of this nerve bullshit."
And we have a winner. Welcome to middle-age, Naomi. When most people start to realize life is more than humping, thinking about humping, and writing boring articles about humping.
I'm so glad that women's lib has eliminated the sexualization of women.
Good God, when will her 15 minutes be over?
Good God, when will her 15 minutes be over?
The first violinist (Brandenburg Concertos Complete) has stayed with the breast strategy.
I used to listen to my grandma and her friends talk as they quilted. This Naomi monologue sounds a lot like them when they got talking about their "female surgeries." Actually, about surgeries and doctors in general.
When I look at her picture it's difficult not to focus on the area in question. As if there were something unique and special there that no one else ever had.
A little less conversation, a little more action please.
Elvis still said it best.
In this instance, I'm in agreement with Larry David via Meade
If I know Wolfe, first she'll do a book about her vagina, then a monograph on her clit, a magazine article about her G-spot, a documentary on her breasts. By then she'll be 70 and the fiber in her diet will no longer be adequate so she'll start a daily tweet on her bowel movements.
Oh to be a writer who went to Yale and studied (apparently literally) under the esteemed critic Harold Bloom.
It's called "old age."
Haven't laughed so hard in ages.
@rhhardin,
Hey, rh, check out your video link at 1:19:00 to 1:19:30 (#6 in Bb)
I knew Lurch played harpsichord, but I never knew Morticia played viola da gamba!
Learn somethin' new every day!
the ‘blended’ clitoral and vaginal orgasms
That sounds like some kind of Bob Guccione Smoothie!
What pathetic self-loathing, limp-dicked, half-a-fag is fucking her? God, left-wing men are so sackless and desperate, they'll take ANY pussy, no matter how used up, fat, bloated, old, pseudo-intellectual, and annoying.
Maybe she should try anal?
@EDH:
They do. Her strap on, his back door.
Sexual equality, everyone!
From the Book Description at Amazon:
When an unexpected medical crisis sends Naomi Wolf on a deeply personal journey to tease out the intersections between sexuality and creativity, she discovers, much to her own astonishment, an increasing body of scientific evidence that suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain—and thus has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself.
In other words, when the Victorians thought that female consciousness was hysterical (womb-dominated), they weren't wrong in theory, just off by a few inches.
Yale must be so proud of such an illustrious alumna!
If, for chicks, the vagina has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself, this must mean for guys that their penis has a fundamental connection to their male consciousness.
Which means ---- wait for it! --- that an erection is a consciousness-raising session!
Ms Wolf is approaching 50 and has seriously chubbed out the last few years. She's played off her looks for ages. It's got to be tough when you lose it like that.
leslyn said...
"Y'all act like she's supposed to live moping."
Leslyn wants to put y'all back in the Change.
Tsk, tsk, tsk, spending all that money on her own personal release. How many children could she have fed if she wasn't so selfish?
Does Obamacare cover blended orgasms?
Naomi Wolf, sex yenta.
Is she supposed to live moping?
It seems to be working for her. If a book length exploration of her orgasms isn't moping what is it?
Mother Teresa she's not.
leslyn said...
l"Whatever you meant to say Meade, it didn't make sense."
That's because you are drunk, leslyn. And tomorrow, I will still be making sense while you, madame, will still be drunk.
Just remember, if you had an orgasm, you didn't build that. Somebone else had a hand in it.
THE MEME!
She just needs to buy Mr. Vagina Wolf a bottle of these little blue pills. Or some extenze...the ol' hedgehog recommends them!
Or maybe, just maybe, men and women weren't meant to be fucking like bunnies as they get older. I mean Jeez, my wife is kinda' glad we've slowed down. For me to clean up just takes a wash rag, for her, it's a goddamn medical procedure.
"Their goal is to dehumanize everyone’s dignity and reduce us to a vagina, anus, or some other body cavity for the sole purpose of exploiting our sexuality."
Defining a human life by its biological continuity seems to engender a much more endearing perspective.
Oh well. Dreams of instant gratification will not be denied. Perhaps some individuals are little more than the sum of their parts. It's a shallow outlook on life, which is ideal for generation terminal.
Wow, Professor! LOL
Wolf seems to have stepped on your last nerve.
Nice to see someone else get upset about crap like this sp let it fly!
+1 with some hootin' and hollerin'!
Plus this is one of the funniest threads I've read here. Congrats all the way 'round.
two words:
trundle
guillotine
Women have so many fucking problems, I can't keep track of them all.
@Friendo - thanks for noting my CYE allusion.
"These big vagina ladies are gettin' away with murder."
In the picture at the article, which feet are the man's feet, and which feet are the woman's feet?
Seriously, after reading Ms. Wolf's little description of her post-coital infused epiphany, I had my own epiphany of wanting to punch her in the head while hearing Joe Bidens voice saying "Unchained Vaginas!!! They'll put y'alls vaginas back in chains."
LOL!!! My wife just read this and all she could say was, "God, what a cunt." I rofl'ed.
Sounds like a throwback to the sixties/seventies when people were always questing for something missing, especially in their sex lives, via drugs, encounter groups, primal scream, rolfing, Reichian therapy, Gestalt Therapy, Esalen, est, consciousness-raising groups, and more.
Then our seekers would emerge triumphant and transformed to sing the praises of whatever it was.
We have what you are missing! Stop moping. Just call 555-PLA-CEBO today!
Perhaps Ms. Wolf has not gone far enough. Perhaps her solution lies a few inches south within another network of nerves.
Perhaps she needs to take a cue from Toni Bentley, who danced for ten years with the NYC Ballet under the master Balanchine, then afterward went on to write The Surrender.
Bliss, I learned from being sodomized, is an experience of eternity in a moment of real time ... The penetration is deeper, more profound; it rides the edge of sanity. The direct path ... to God, has become clear, has been cleared.
Not just emotional intimacy with a partner, but with God! Why settle for less?
I need to send my orfices to school or something. I don't find any of them that interesting. My dog seems tuned into that world, so maybe it's just me.
Scott Bradford winz da internets for the month.
"Miss Wolf told the Sunday Times: ‘I almost fell off my chair in astonishment…neural wiring? Not culture, not upbringing, not patriarchy, not feminism, not Freud?...’"
She's out of the corral. Rein her back in womyn.
I think this is a sub-genre of that enduring feminist topic, "You don't understand me".....Naomi certainly has an unusually complicated vagina. Perhaps this is a way of legitimizing her doctor fetish. I think she could find happiness with any competent neurologist provided he has done some cross training in gynecology.
She lost me completely when she started going on about how hot a burqa was. At that point you've officially become a nutty lady and I don't want to hear your spoiled, sheltered musings about your spoiled, sheltered vagina.
I literally spent all day following a bunch of aging Code Pink women dressed as pink glittery vaginas lurching around downtown Tampa as they howled about the Republicans imposing on their vaginas, their labial folds flapping in the pre-hurricane breezes.
Now, this.
Fifty shades of ick.
an increasing body of scientific evidence that suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain
Next she'll be telling us the uterus is part of the brain, and can reject implantation when a woman is traumatized- like during legitimate rape.
Naomi needs to read about the attitude of the Roman Emperors towards sexual indulgences.
When finally free , it sems that a man or a woman is 24/7 totally depraved, bi-sexual, incestuous, adulterous, murdering for sport and extremely cruel.
Until she attains that level of freedom she is being oppressed by Judeo-Christian morality. Freud said that too.
There's a reason your head is at the North Pole and your Melvin ( my word for vagina) is at the South Pole and it's this: out of sight, out of mind. Ladies, are you really obsessing about a place on your body that you need a mirror and flashlight to gaze upon? Pull up your pants and get on with your life.
YoungHegelian,
In other words, when the Victorians thought that female consciousness was hysterical (womb-dominated), they weren't wrong in theory, just off by a few inches.
Feminists think with their pussies, even as they complain about men thinking with their dicks.
Carniflex,
Just remember, if you had an orgasm, you didn't build that. Somebone else had a hand in it.
An entire hand?
No wonder Naomi's depressed.
I wonder if she'll write Maude Lebowski's biography?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xs3OWJ53rHE
So, we have met the person who can actually can ruin an orgasm. That's hard.
Is there a preferred ratio for a blended orgasm? Is it 80/20 or 60/40 or just 50/50?
We've been doing okay with 100/100 but I want to comply with all the regulations.
Is there a winter blend to cut down on smog, you know, like winter blend gasoline?
We have used ethanol from time to time to augment the blend, but the blend is inconsistant, mainly due to poor bartending skills. Plus, a too-high ethanol component in the blend tends to negate the other components.
Between HuffPo writing about anal tatoos and Naomi Wolf scribing whole books about her vagina, we've managed to obliterate everything beautiful and romantic about making love. I swear, the Japanese sex robots are more sensitive and subtle than the progs.
Why twits like this have an audience is beyond me.
Seriously, I read a lot: books and online and magazines and blogs and mainstream journalism and everything I can get my hands on, and I encounter all this navel-gazing and complexity-inventing, and then I return to the real world and interact with my coworkers, my church, my kids' friends' parents, their coaches and scout leaders and teachers, my husband's coworkers and people who come to my house to fix the airconditioning and the oil field and offshore rig workers in my town here in Texas and I think: Not a single person I come across in a month knows or cares who Naomi Wolf is or gives two shits about her vagina, and would look at her like she was a crazy person if she talked to them about same.
Don't forget Naomi wrote a breathless account prior to the last election that the Republican Police State was coming, because her children's report cards and party invitations were being lost in the mail...
She should be parachute dropped into the Taliban headquarters. The war would be over.
Why twits like this have an audience is beyond me.
That's easy: this twit has a twat.
suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain—and thus has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself.
Isn't that the same as saying that women think with their pussies?
This is rich. After generations of women complaining that men think only with their "little head", they now want us to believe that thinking with our genitals is a good thing. Well, at least when women do it. Anything men do naturally is unfortunate at best.
Amazing to me to see boomer women going ballistic about their reproductive rights being taken away. Apparently, they have Paul Ryan confused with Father Time.
But no penis biography is necessary, see, because penises are so simple, compared to ... well, you know.
Men can have multidimensional orgasms too, but generally prefer projection into the simpler and lower-dimensional subspace.
http://www.anvari.org/fun/Gender/A_Little_Difference_Between_Men_and_Women.html
Readers of the Times are very smart -- that's why they keep buying and reading the Times, and believing what they read.
And dang, someone stole my Mandrakes :)
- From a Salon.com interview on her book...
Do you think feminists are going to be ticked off by your book?
My book owes everything to the feminist movement. I am a product of that. I am a woman who had this experience that was very unconventional … I am interested in my sex: in experiencing it and in the powers it holds for me. I am interested in our freedoms: You’re a woman and I’m a woman having this conversation about this kind of book — this is fantastic! But I think some women will protest the obvious things that I am talking about: submitting or surrender. I say feminism gave me the freedom to submit. Isn’t this what we all want from feminism? The ability to choose conventional monogamy is a great option but not the only option.
And my ability to submit — I wouldn’t have been a woman who could have done that even 10 or 20 years ago.
creeley23 said...
Perhaps Ms. Wolf has not gone far enough. Perhaps her solution lies a few inches south within another network of nerves.
Perhaps she needs to take a cue from Toni Bentley, who danced for ten years with the NYC Ballet under the master Balanchine, then afterward went on to write The Surrender.
Bliss, I learned from being sodomized, is an experience of eternity in a moment of real time ... The penetration is deeper, more profound; it rides the edge of sanity. The direct path ... to God, has become clear, has been cleared.
Not just emotional intimacy with a partner, but with God! Why settle for less?
Sounds almost like Wolf lifted her experience from Bentley and projected it to her vagina, unlike Bentley did to her ass.
From the book description on Amazon:
...she discovers, much to her own astonishment, an increasing body of scientific evidence that suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain—and thus has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself.
So... the premise of the entire book is that women think with their twats? And this is somehow empowering? When men think with their dicks it is supposed to be a bad thing.
Erika said...
Why twits like this have an audience is beyond me.
Seriously, I read a lot: books and online and magazines and blogs and mainstream journalism and everything I can get my hands on, and I encounter all this navel-gazing and complexity-inventing, and then I return to the real world and interact with my coworkers, my church, my kids' friends' parents, their coaches and scout leaders and teachers, my husband's coworkers and people who come to my house to fix the airconditioning and the oil field and offshore rig workers in my town here in Texas and I think: Not a single person I come across in a month knows or cares who Naomi Wolf is or gives two shits about her vagina, and would look at her like she was a crazy person if she talked to them about same.
This is he great confusion of leftards vs. conservatives. Leftards want to wax poetically and soliloquy about the most utterly mundane nonsense they can conjure from within the deep recesses of their ever thinking minds. Thinking that in doing so they will come off as well-intentioned, deep thinking, intellectually heavy orators of whatever it is they are disseminating on to try and pass off this utter nonsense as a type of masterful intuitive knowledge that only they possess. While conservatives can and do often ignore the gnats of the solemn vapors that these leftards project and mentally bin them as being irrelevant and unrelatable and therefore not worthy of their notice. Or what I like better is, is that conservatives can take even the higher level concepts that these leftards project and distill them into simple, understandable concepts without so much as a how do you do.
Phelps said...
From the book description on Amazon:
...she discovers, much to her own astonishment, an increasing body of scientific evidence that suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain—and thus has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself.
So... the premise of the entire book is that women think with their twats? And this is somehow empowering? When men think with their dicks it is supposed to be a bad thing.
LOL, given what I just said above and reading this. I rest my case.
Imagine what she went through to find the doctor who "cured" her:
OFFICE #1:
Receptionist for back Dr.: Okay, hon, whadaya got?
NW: Well, you see.. it's about my orgasms... well, not really. My orgasms are actually really, REALLY great! BUT... afterwards... it's, like... you know what I mean? There's just like... kinda something missing. Not like it was, when I felt it tune with the universe and full of self-realization... You know?
Rcpt: Ma'm, we're very busy here. Do you have a problem you need to see the doctor about? Otherwise I don't think we can help you. Next?
OFFICE #2:
Recpt.: Ma'm, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Security!
OFFICE: #3
Rcpt: Ma'm—
NW: Yeah, I'm leaving.
I've always suspected the path to a woman's heart is through her vagina. Now Naomi Wolf is telling us that's the path to her brain too. Got it.
She went to the top of a holy mountain and the guru, sitting in the lotus position, said, "My good liberal, to reach the final stage of joy and enlightenment you seek, you must go though the healthcare system."
rhhardin said..._Vagina: A New Biography_ needs a "Look Inside" link on Amazon.
Then, in the index, a "Surprise Me" selection.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
chickelit said...Who's afraid of Vagina Wolf?
She's a beautiful, intelligent, talented, creative human.
Naomi Wolf is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.
The Vagina Cult. At least the penis cult people had a sense of humor. Priapus was kind of a joke. Vagina Cult people sound very serious and boring, like they need to get laid properly. Hey, there, problem solved.
Headline on Drudge: "Protestors Dressed as Giant Vaginas Greet GOP Delegates."
Yes, ladies, this is how the DNC sees you: Giant vaginas. With feet. Well, some of the vaginas are allowed to write propaganda for The Party, so there's that.
Who's conducting a war on women, really?
You are right, les - I don't care.
i'd gorilla pound her until....
Seriously, you wonder why men were reluctant to let these creatures vote? This is how we got every liberal since Roosevelt...
I must assume that since her publisher keeps publishing her books, there are people out there who read them. Who do you suppose they are?
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