Althouse: Beaver woman can't fit in a tight spot.

August 10, 2011

Beaver woman can't fit in a tight spot.

What would you do?

42 comments:

A. Shmendrik said...: Doh!; 8/10/11, 3:01 PM
Joe said...: (The Uncredentialed, Crypto Jew)

Beaver Womyn and “Alien Eggs” is there a connection? Inquiring Minds want to know.; 8/10/11, 3:01 PM
Chip S. said...: Hairy situation, or smooth sailing?; 8/10/11, 3:02 PM
Widely Seen said...: Depends -- is she carrying?
If so, she is probably too polite to invite local 'youth' to remove the offending vehicle using muscle-power for a ca$h reward...; 8/10/11, 3:06 PM
ndspinelli said...: This is quite similar to a story line in Curb Your Enthusiasm last week.; 8/10/11, 3:08 PM
Chip S. said...: It's such an unusual situation. Typically it's much harder going in than pulling out.; 8/10/11, 3:09 PM
TWM said...: Decorum keeps me from making a "tight beaver" joke.; 8/10/11, 3:09 PM
chickelit said...: 6 is too young. I've been teaching my son, 13, to drive lately (only in deserted parking lots) but he's already 5'8"

In some farm states kids used to drive legally at 14.; 8/10/11, 3:10 PM
Fred4Pres said...: You enjoyed that headline very much, didn't you?; 8/10/11, 3:17 PM
Mary Beth said...: Go back into the high school and ask them to make an announcement asking the driver of the other car to come move it. Or ask them to call a tow truck.

Was the other car really that close or is she just over-sized?; 8/10/11, 3:17 PM
traditionalguy said...: She was fighting tight parking like a girl!

But at that age she is not yet a Beaver woman.

Great moves. When she is 18 the U. of Wisconsin could make her their first female left tackle.; 8/10/11, 3:19 PM
Chip S. said...: Decorum keeps me from making a "tight beaver" joke.

What is this "decorum" of which you speak? Some obscure Latin term?; 8/10/11, 3:23 PM
Curious George said...: Fart jokes tomorrow?; 8/10/11, 3:24 PM
Fred4Pres said...: This should be an insurance civil claim, with possibly a traffic infraction, not a criminal matter. It does not appear anyone got hurt.

When I was a kid, I was home sick from school. My dad had my brother in the car (which was idleing) and he ran in to get something. It think it was a Chevy with a standard on the steering column transmission. The car took off. It kept going in slow wide circles on the front lawn (my brother still in the back), smacking my grandmother's car that was parked on the street each time it went around. It might have done 20 passes. Eventually my dad managed a running start to open the driver's door and to get back in the car and stop it.

I watched this from the front window thinking: "I would have to be sick today!" I wanted to be in the car with my brother. It looked like a lot of fun from the window.

My mom and grandmother did not have fun watching it. My dad looked pretty ashen too.

I am sure the insurance adjusters had a good time with that one.; 8/10/11, 3:25 PM
Automatic_Wing said...: My mother grew up in Beaver, Pa. Lovely little town.

The woman in question, though, is from Aliquippa, which is a whole different kettle of fish, as they say. Being run over by a 6 year old driver is the least of your worries when you live in Da Quip.; 8/10/11, 3:27 PM
Chip S. said...: Fart jokes tomorrow?

Why wait?; 8/10/11, 3:28 PM
Carol_Herman said...: What?

I thought to make a "tight spot" ... you needed to have a huge supporting pole on your passenger side.

Who designed the parking spot spaces?

I bet a lawyer can bring a lawsuit against the jerk whose tires were over the line. Making it possible for only a child to open a door ... and get inside.

But living where I do? Near Monterey Park? You think I willingly drive there? You haven't seen anything yet, until you've seen Chinese drivers. And, parking lots.

My sympathy for the adult ... that cuoldn't squeeze herself into the driver's seat.

If it was me, I'd have just called the Triple A.

Their truck works as a wonderful blocking mechanism, too.

And, they can pull a car. As well as push it. By sticking a hook underneath.; 8/10/11, 3:33 PM
Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...: What would you do?

Add lube?; 8/10/11, 3:34 PM
I'm Full of Soup said...: Aliquipa was Tony Dorsett's hometown? Joe Willie Namath was from Beaver Falls.; 8/10/11, 3:39 PM
Chip S. said...: Joe Willie Namath was from Beaver Falls.

And it always did just that for him, until Suzy Kolber.; 8/10/11, 3:40 PM
traditionalguy said...: Chip S ...I once had a fraternity brother from there who called his hometown "Beaver Balls."

I wonder if he lived past cirrhosis of the liver.; 8/10/11, 3:43 PM
chickelit said...: Curious George said...
Fart jokes tomorrow?

This is what happens when Trooper goes on vacation.; 8/10/11, 3:49 PM
KLDAVIS said...: "In some farm states kids used to drive legally at 14."

I learned to drive on the farm at 12, half ton pickup trucks. My understanding is that it was perfectly legal, as we were on private roads.

6 is far too young, though...I'd probably have called a tow truck, but I'm the size of an average NFL lineman, and I've only ever been in a situation like this one once. I finally managed to squeeze into the passenger seat and shimmy over the center console. The new car has a giant sun roof...could easily climb through that, assuming I had someone who could get inside to open it.; 8/10/11, 3:54 PM
jungatheart said...: Did Drudge hack Althouse?; 8/10/11, 4:00 PM
Quaestor said...: "Beaver woman can't fit in a tight spot."

"Accused cereal rapist manbearpig blames global warming."

It's the end of the world as we know it.; 8/10/11, 4:01 PM
traditionalguy said...: I bet that Carol_Herman would be just as dangerous reading her Mark Twain while driving. I'm not sure about her story that she listens to the audio version of the book while driving but then reads from the hard cover at the table.; 8/10/11, 4:25 PM
bearing said...: I can honestly say, of all the possible remedies that might have occurred to me, having a 6-year-old child operate my car would not even have surfaced in my consciousness.

Niece, not daughter. I am betting this woman has no kids of her own. Wonder what sis said later.; 8/10/11, 4:30 PM
Wince said...: "Nice Beaver"...

"Let me help you with that."; 8/10/11, 4:34 PM
Bart Hall (Kansas, USA) said...: Beginning with its 250th anniversary in 1920, Hudson's Bay Company published 'BEAVER', a magazine describing the company's storied history in the Arctic.

By the mid-1980s they were getting a fair number of cancellations, along the line of "this isn't what I thought it was going to be."

In the mid-1990s they started covering Canadian history in general, but were still having problems with their name.

It was changed in 2010.

The best irony of all is that for over 300 years the HBC's standard unit of internal currency was the Split Beaver, and to this day the number of black 'points' on a Hudson's Bay blanket refers to its approximate value in beaver hides.

I have a six-point, and quite happily there's usually a split beaver somewhere under it.; 8/10/11, 4:39 PM
Carol_Herman said...: Different books, Traditional Guy.

I'm listening to a wonderful audio done by Patrick Fraley. It's a BBC recording of Huckleberry Finn.

I'm reading Lawrence Krauss' QUANTUM MAN. About Richard Feynman's Life in Science. Just published, too.

When I was a student, long ago, I learned to read different books ... by having to switch them every 50 minutes. No two teachers were working out of the same books.

And, I did learn to become a powerful reader!

On the other hand, I HATE to drive! So, "listening" just occurs when I travel.

Still, just locally, I've managed to put 33,000 miles onto my speedometer.

One book at a time? WHY? At least I'm not watching TV. So I don't have to handle a remote.; 8/10/11, 4:53 PM
Megaera said...: KLDavis - according to my father, who's 94, he learned to drive when he was 11, along with his older brothers, in the family touring car. He had to tie a blocks to the pedals to reach them with his feet and sat on a cushion to see out through the windscreen, but he was thereupon deemed a good enough driver to drive my grandmother from Chicago to Detroit and back several times in the ensuing years -- everyone in the family who had seen HER drive considered it a no-brainer. Might not have believed it had it not been confirmed by one of his brothers.; 8/10/11, 5:33 PM
bagoh20 said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 8/10/11, 5:47 PM
bagoh20 said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 8/10/11, 5:50 PM
bagoh20 said...: Dammed fat fingers.

The kid gets in without starting it, puts it in neutral and you push it 6 feet. The kid can push the brake to stop if needed.

Something tells me this woman had what it takes physically to push a vehicle.; 8/10/11, 5:52 PM
edutcher said...: A setup like that and ironrails is nowhere to be found.

O! The irony!!!

WV "mismoe" What Curly and Larry did when the rumors about Moe and Shemp proved true.; 8/10/11, 5:54 PM
Known Unknown said...: Is Sadie's Big Beaver still open down there?

ZING!

There was/is a restaurant called Sadie's Big Beaver in the town of Beaver, or its whereabouts.

I grew up north of Beaver in Hooterville, PA.; 8/10/11, 6:53 PM
bbbeard said...: I would have had the 6 year old lower the windows, and I would have climbed on the roof and slipped in the window from above.

No, on second thought I would have gotten the jack out of my trunk, jacked up one side of the offending intruder as high as it would go, and pushed it over a foot or so. Or better still, inserted the jack between my wheels and theirs (with plenty of padding on my side) and levered it over that way.; 8/10/11, 9:15 PM
Sue D'Nhym said...: Headless body found in topless bar.; 8/10/11, 9:59 PM
jamboree said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 8/11/11, 3:21 AM
Toad Trend said...: The woman probably needs evaluation for that.

Really stupid. Child endangerment at the very least.; 8/11/11, 5:30 AM
The TrogloPundit said...: Just have the kid put it in neutral and then push it out. You don't even have to start the engine.; 8/11/11, 10:53 AM
Lance Burri said...: Just have the kid put it in neutral and then push it out. You don't even have to start the engine.; 8/11/11, 10:54 AM