Althouse: At the Cheesehead Café...

February 3, 2011

At the Cheesehead Café...

(Enlarge to read.)

... bring out your inner cheesehead.

40 comments:

MadisonMan said...: Go Pack!

Yesterday's snowday screwed up my inner day-knowledge, so I don't think it's Thursday today. It feels more like Monday. So tomorrow brings to an end a very short work week.; 2/3/11, 12:55 PM
Original Mike said...: Real cheeseheads drink beer.

Just sayin'.; 2/3/11, 12:59 PM
Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...: Sadly, these appear to be out of stock.; 2/3/11, 1:01 PM
Original Mike said...: Althouse, I hope you are sharpening up your inestimable powers of mockery for the {snicker} terrible towel.; 2/3/11, 1:01 PM
TMink said...: I think Original Mike has a salient criticism. Me, I have eaten and liked cheese curds, I make a mean Tom and Jerry, but I think that is all the cheesehead in me.

Trey; 2/3/11, 1:01 PM
Ann Althouse said...: Okay, now I know what the "terrible towel" is.; 2/3/11, 1:08 PM
Phil 314 said...: Love the description:
Semi-sweet all American white table wine. Flavors of apricots and hints of pears with honey-like sweetness

If you replaced the "table wine" with "cheese" it would sound appealing. As a "table wine" not so much.

PS The little cheesehead toppers wouldn't do it for me either but hey, I live in AZ.

PPS I'm glad Steve does Facebook also.; 2/3/11, 1:08 PM
Original Mike said...: "Okay, now I know what the "terrible towel" is."

It's pathetic, that's what it is. I'd be more afraid of the daunting diaper.; 2/3/11, 1:12 PM
traditionalguy said...: I love these cute customs of the Dairy people passed down over generations. Does it have anything to do with the Dairy people's creation myth? Or is it an artifact from the early Lombardy People; 2/3/11, 1:17 PM
Phil 314 said...: It's pathetic, that's what it is. I'd be more afraid of the daunting diaper.

People wearing large yellow foam triangles on their heads are in no position to criticize someone else waving a small yellow towel.

(Yellow will be the operative color, won't it.); 2/3/11, 1:22 PM
The Crack Emcee said...: Original Mike,

Real cheeseheads drink beer.

Poofs have no shame. They'll warp a culture, lie, spin - anything - to make the weak and feckless feel good about being what they are. Sure, being a cheesehead has always meant having a gay-assed artsy-fartsy wine and cheese party, like attending a football game in a blizzard is derived from going to art openings in Manhattan.

As they shame us all, they wonder why they can't find acceptance amongst "real" Americans:

One reason is because they have no respect for the traditions of real America.; 2/3/11, 1:23 PM
garage mahal said...: Crack-
WTF?; 2/3/11, 1:31 PM
Original Mike said...: "Me, I have eaten and liked cheese curds,"

Time for you to step up to deep fried cheese curds, Trey.; 2/3/11, 1:32 PM
Original Mike said...: Crack is right on, man.; 2/3/11, 1:33 PM
Patrick said...: Bushman, your little picture there takes me back to my WI roots, as my first non-farm, non-paper route job was at Big Boy off 94 at Grandview. Back in those days, actually having a job I enjoyed seemed about as likely as a Packer superbowl appearance.

Good to have both. Go Pack!; 2/3/11, 1:34 PM
traditionalguy said...: Mystery solved Dr Watson. The masthead slogan change gives away that Cheesehead Wine has been the Professor' secrets elixir.I am ordering several cases today. Then we will see who is the smoothest debater.; 2/3/11, 1:46 PM
TMink said...: Deep fried cheese curds?

I feel my inner cheese head growing!

Trey; 2/3/11, 1:52 PM
SteveR said...: Does it come in a box?; 2/3/11, 1:53 PM
The Crack Emcee said...: garaji mahal,

Crack-WTF?

Dude, this makes as much sense as attending a gallery opening, and finding they're serving PBRs and chili dogs. It just don't happen - and they'd never consider doing it. But fucking with the traditions of other parts of the culture? Hey - anything goes! No need to respect those yahoos, painting their chests and faces, rooting for their team in the cold, right? You can do anything you want - to them!

Fuck those assholes - because they're assholes.; 2/3/11, 1:58 PM
Toad Trend said...: @Ann

"Okay, now I know what the "terrible towel" is."

The Towel is but a 'terrible' prop that accompanies the 'costumes' of both the players and their fans.

@Phil 3:14

"People wearing large yellow foam triangles on their heads are in no position to criticize someone else waving a small yellow towel."

Word!

wv - mentati

Mensa; 2/3/11, 1:58 PM
coketown said...: @traditionalguy: The pasty white skin from the elbow up is a relic of their creation myth. The costumes are products of their fertility myths. An entire chapter of the Golden Bough was dedicated to Cheeseheads and this very issue.; 2/3/11, 2:09 PM
ricpic said...: "...honey-like sweetness."

Translation: Cloyingly sweet. As with Manischewitz must cut with lemon juice to make it bearably sweet.; 2/3/11, 2:11 PM
Original Mike said...: "Does it have anything to do with the Dairy people's creation myth?"

"When Better Men Are Made,
Wisconsin Women Will Make Them."; 2/3/11, 2:18 PM
garage mahal said...: Dude, this makes as much sense as attending a gallery opening, and finding they're serving PBRs and chili dogs. It just don't happen - and they'd never consider doing it. But fucking with the traditions of other parts of the culture? Hey - anything goes! No need to respect those yahoos, painting their chests and faces, rooting for their team in the cold, right? You can do anything you want - to them!

Fuck those assholes - because they're assholes.

This Cheesehead wine is made in Wisconsin.; 2/3/11, 2:24 PM
Triangle Man said...: Go Pack!; 2/3/11, 2:29 PM
The Concrete Dog said...: in egypt long ago
they did not know of cheese

the pharohs dughter brot me
evrywehre
dressd me in finery
n did not make me waer a hat

at th banks of a rivr
she ate grapes n sycamore figs
not chees

i learnt ther r few things
as beatifl as
girls in bulrushes
in the late atumn sun; 2/3/11, 2:34 PM
Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...: Feelin so Fly like a Cheesehead; 2/3/11, 2:40 PM
Unknown said...: One presumes the Professor prefers the wine with the twist off cap to that which comes in boxes.; 2/3/11, 3:09 PM
Lucien said...: $14.99 a bottle? Is that the blizzard price?

Ann's new banner quote may be the closest she'll get to being U.S. Grant.; 2/3/11, 3:32 PM
traditionalguy said...: Concrete Dog...Were you re-incarnated from a cock roach?; 2/3/11, 3:42 PM
traditionalguy said...: Lucien...Watch out dissing U. S. Grant. Mark Twain's new biography really rehabilitates Grant's reputation.; 2/3/11, 3:45 PM
The Concrete Dog said...: i yam wot i yam
a retired god
i am not i-am-who-am
and not no bug ether

i was set atop a cokroach once
he beggd for help and thn
expird

tho i am made of stone
my heart is not
his small voice meltd away
alway felt bad bout the lil guy
i rly culdnt budge

it wasnt persnl i sware; 2/3/11, 3:48 PM
The Crack Emcee said...: This Cheesehead wine is made in Wisconsin.

Made by somebody wearing his sweater around his neck. And who - at the first opportunity - is going to take your Wisconsin money to vacation in fruity fucking France, where he'll agree with them about how weird, violent, and backwards real cheeseheads are, because they don't think like (or have any interest in) any of them because we beer-and-whiskey-drinking, shit-talking, rabble-rousing group of football-not-soccer-loving mutts is sick and tired of having to save, or answer to, these wimpy wine-swilling assholes who think they're going to change us without a fight - which, BTW, also makes them stupid.

If "This Cheesehead wine is made in Wisconsin" is the best you can do, then Pittsburgh is going to kick your ass.; 2/3/11, 5:08 PM
Anonymous said...: Hey, I've gone from "loathsome racist" to "Althouse defender" within the space of hours.

Ain't the internet great?

At least, teach, you haven't given me a grade on my writing style, ala that poor schmuck Scott Lemieux.; 2/3/11, 6:23 PM
Jim Hu said...: Can you use it to make a jump the muskie martini?; 2/3/11, 7:08 PM
Jeff with one 'f' said...: Crack- I agree about the traditions especially but as for the PBR at an opening- it's been done and is already passe in Brooklyn openings. On the other hand, I've yet to get a decent chili-dog anywhere near a gallery!; 2/3/11, 7:20 PM
The Crack Emcee said...: Jeff with one 'f',

Crack- I agree about the traditions especially but as for the PBR at an opening- it's been done and is already passe in Brooklyn openings.

Damn - you're right - I forgot about that when I wrote it. How about Coor's? Are they drinking Coor's? Coor's was against gays for a while, so they can't be drinking Coor's, can they?

I bethcha they ain't drinking Coor's.; 2/3/11, 8:51 PM
garage mahal said...: If "This Cheesehead wine is made in Wisconsin" is the best you can do, then Pittsburgh is going to kick your ass.

Ain't no one kicked Green Bay's ass in a long time. And I wouldn't look for that against Pittsburgh.; 2/3/11, 9:03 PM
The Crack Emcee said...: garaji mahal,

Ain't no one kicked Green Bay's ass in a long time. And I wouldn't look for that against Pittsburgh.

Sheeeiiit. After the Jets-Steelers blowout, my roommate said, "Remind me not to bet against you."

Now I'm saying (with trumpets blaring and the immortal Vince Lombardi in mind) that fruity Cheesehead wine is a clear indicator Wisconsin - and, thus, the Green Bay Packers - have been pansied-up to the point where they ain't what they used to be. Crack's call:

The Steelers win.; 2/3/11, 9:42 PM
TeamOSweet said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 2/3/11, 10:07 PM