I yelled at Madonna today, and I didn't even realize it until later!
She's apparently directing a film (!) and was shooting right in front of my house in Brooklyn on Wednesday. I came outside to do my morning walk and there were crowds of people all over the place: screaming black girls, curious Chassidim, hipsters in Ray-Bans feigning disinterest, irritated cops... I saw a bunch of Arri equipment boxes and realized it was a film shoot of some sort. I walked a few feet down my block and a chick with a headset held up her arm and said "You have to cross the street, sir!" I replied: "I don't have to do anything. This is my neighborhood, and a public sidewalk, and I'll go where I please!"
I walked a few more feet and another drone with a headset came rushing up to me and said "The sidewalk's closed. Please cross the street!" I replied: "This is a public sidewalk. I will continue to walk where I please."
I pushed past him and a I came upon a haggard woman in sunglasses, a baseball cap and a scarf printed with a stylized skull pattern holding a clipboard and looking into a hand-held monitor along with a couple of other people. Being a veteran of the terrible world of film production, I recognized that this woman was probably the director. I paused as I passed and said to her: "You need to inform your brain-dead P.A.s that they need to treat us residents a little better, honey." She looked at me, expressionless behind her sunglasses for a moment before one of the men with her said "Move along, sir." I replied "a hearty fuck you to both of you" and I walked onward.
Later, when I was on my way home, I stopped in the local market and the Korean guy who runs the place said to me: "what do you think of that mess out there?" I told him of my encounter with the production assistants and the director. He laughed and said: "do you know who that director is? Madonna!"
I smiled and said "No, I didn't recognize her.. but she looks like hell and sure runs a shitty location shoot."
September 16, 2010
"I yelled at Madonna today, and I didn't even realize it until later!"
So Madonna is filming this movie in Brooklyn... and our longtime commenter Palladian has an encounter:
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93 comments:
Now that's one of those bucket list things: Say Fuck You To Madonna!
Check!
It's a small world sometimes. Did Camille Paglia show up and see her Madonna Idol acting human?
This reminds me of the time I ran right into Hillary Clinton on 14th St. and 8th Ave.
I was out for a lunch time walk and I stumbled right into her. Literally! She's very short, so I didn't even see her until I was right on top of her.
She had evidently just given a speech to a public worker's union. I was very surprised at how lax her security was. They never attempted to stop me and they didn't even come after me once I bumped into her.
She was running for Senate at the time. After she regained her composure, she extended a hand and said: "I would appreciate your vote," or something to that effect.
"I'm voting for Rudi," I replied.
At that time, Rudi Guiliani was still in the Senate race.
Hillary is even more unattractive in person than on the tube. She's got some serious bags on her hips. She's quite dowdy.
How that I think about it, she and Madonna have a lot in common. Madonna is an ugly broad, too.
The careers of both argue eminently against the emancipation of women.
The city gets its money whether or not the PAs are nice to you. The shot happens whether or not the PAs are nice to you. (Where "you" is generic, and not you, Palladian).
Mere citizens are so insignificant.
But it's a cool story!
I danced with Halley Berry at the Bat back in the mid 90's. I didn't realise who she was until somebody mentioned it and she was long gone.
I once held the door open for C. Everett Koop. He walked through it.
If I recall correctly, there was then a second set of doors, which he opened for himself.
So far, mine is the least interesting story told in this post.
Obviously Palladian could not recognize Madonna with her clothes on.
My co-host and I got free tickets to U2 in Indy back in 2000. While we were getting beer, JJ hit me on the shoulder and said, "holy shit...that's Jason Preistly". I turned around to look and saw only a short, thin guy with a full beard.
I didn't know at the time that he was a huge F1 racing fan, was in town with an F1 team corporate sponser, and had, indeed, grown a full beard.
Our "seats" were actually on a slightly raised deck just behind the sound board. We ended up hanging out with Mr. Preistly, who is also a huge U2 fan, hung out with us and a couple other people for the entire show. We were very careful not to mention the show, but instead befriended him as anyone does at rock concerts with the cool stranger next to you that knows all same songs you do and is just as fired up. You know...that game everyone does trying to guess what the next song is going to be by the first couple of drum beats or guitar chords.
All in all a very cool experience.
@traditionalguy
It's not a small world, but all the people who matter choose to live in a small part of it.
We were very careful not to mention the show,
Meaning his teen hearthrob work, not U2.
She must be shooting him set in a very poor area of Brooklyn.
What was the race of the people wearing Ray-Ban's?
Love it when we point out the race of someone for no reason other than...?
Probably close to a Domino's pizza - where Palladian hangs out all day long.
She must be shooting him set in a very poor area of Brooklyn.
Do you live in Brooklyn, dtl? If not, it's not your fight.
And very far from an Equinox I'm sure. . .
Great story!
I believe that rudeness to residents is required during location shoots. When I was growing up, they shot a scene from the movie "Portnoy's Complaint" outside our house. The director -- who actually had a beret and one of those folding canvas chairs that say "Director" on the back -- came into our house over and over during the afternoon to use our phone (those were the pre-cell-phone days.) Instead of saying please or thank you, he remarked superciliously that his movie shoot was probably the most exciting thing that had happened in our neighborhood since they rolled up all the sidewalks. My brothers paid him back for his rudeness by sneaking into his shot, where, if you know where to look, they can be seen on the DVD to this day.
That's a great story. Wonder if anyone got Palladian on camera doing what he does best- telling the truth.
[I guess Mayor Bloomberg was busy extinguishing someone's cigarette and doing raids on black market salt traffickers so he could not warn the residents of this inconvenience in their neighborhood]
I suspect that Palladian's story will be the most interesting aspect of Madonna's entire movie.
Much more compelling and likely much better told.
Our man Palladian! Go Ahead On!!
I recognize that Palladian, not the guy that won the primary on Tuesday.
That's a funny story. The only celebrity encounter of any note I can remember from NYC was spotting Lauren Bacall walking her dog a few years ago. It was a cute sight, and I was glad I recognized her. I didn't speak to her though.
How that I think about it, she and Madonna have a lot in common. Madonna is an ugly broad, too.
And to think - Clinton actually had the audacity to extend her hand to you, just like most other politicians would have. Can't those ugly women just know their place, instead of offending an Adonis such as yourself with their baggy hips and (I'm guessing) clawed withered hands?
Madonna's connection with Brooklyn extends beyond this shoot. Her daughter attends the same school as my kids in BrHeights.
These location shoots can be quite a disruptive nuisance. They happen about once a month in the Heights; the Br Bridge walkway has had a few recently; and there has been one going on outside my office in Manhattan for the last few days.
It seems that movie-goers can't get enough of NYC streetscapes. Perhaps Palladian will mellow out in a day or two, and even come to see the virtue in putting up with twenty-somethings in headsets as the (small) price of sharing the City with all the unfortunates who don't get to live here.
After all, it's part of the role of civic leadership that Yale trained him for.
Sic transit gloria mundi.
That's Lady Gaga in twenty-five years...
Can't those ugly women just know their place, instead of offending an Adonis such as yourself with their baggy hips and (I'm guessing) clawed withered hands?
I've got to agree with you here.
Why can't those ugly (bitchy) women just know their place?
In my 60 years on this earth, those ugly, baggy hipped women seem to have been determined to be as awful, bitchy and vicious as possible.
Remember all those years of bitching at the patriarchy? Remember all those vicious attacks on men? Remember all the godawful stupid attempts to claim that suburban women were oppressed just like blacks in the Jim Crow south?
Don't care any more if I offend them.
I'm out for myself. Don't give a damn about the women like Hillary and Madonna. They're out for themselves.
Right?
And, believe it or not, there are women on my side who care about how they look and who are decent in their treatment of men.
Men have other alternatives, honey, than just putting up with bitches.
I've had a couple of celebrity encounters. When She's Having A Baby was filming at the train station in Glencoe, Il, I was there at one point when everyone was on a n evening break. A man with his Labrador Retriever came up and it was Kevin Bacon. I talked to him for about an hour, just talking about this and that. His dog's name was Jane and he had strep throat at the time and wasn't feeling his best. I didn't make a big fuss over his being Kevin Bacon, he knew who he was. An hour or so later when they were going to resume filming the poor man was surrounded by girls all screaming his name.
They had all the trailers in the parking lot, set up like a little village. I went back the next day and was wandering around the trailers. People thought I was working the film, I was invited into the makeup trailer for coffee and someone else asked if I wanted in on John Hughes' football pool.
wv: germats
shouting,
Re lax security: I was at Arlington National Cemetery a few years ago, on a Sunday morning. On our way out, stopping to use the restrooms in the visitor center, we noticed Orinn Hatch standing and talking with a small group of people. If he had any security at all, it certainly wasn't evident, and for sure they weren't securing him against any sudden moves from my direction!
It was actually a comforting contrast with the way that people like Mayor Daley, and even whichever clown now "runs" Seattle, move about their daily lives.
I've had a couple of celebrity encounters. When She's Having A Baby was filming at the train station in Glencoe, Il,
That's what kills me about Hollywood productions. Wasn't the commuter train station only in the film a couple of times for a couple of second each?
I can relate. My wife and I did a whirlwind weekend through New England about ten years back (only time I've been there) and ran across Martha Stewart (pre-jail) filming a sequence in Acadia National Park. Likewise, the assistants barked everyone into and out of place rudely and arrogantly. It was tempting to shout during the shoot and ruin the takes; sometimes native Midwestern manners are a heavy burden.
The entire scene was jarring. Here was this beautiful natural scene, but the presence of the crew and their manner turned it into an artificial circus. Phoniness and entitlement: what an unpleasant mix!
@ScottM: It was in several times, showing Kevin Bacon's character waiting for the train to go downtown or coming back off the train in the evening. At that time, the Chicago & Northwestern North Line Saturday schedule had a large gap between 2 pm and 8 pm or so when no trains ran north or south. John Hughes was able to use this gap for filming, "borrowing" a train to come into the station when necessary for the character and extras to board or debark.
In the station waiting room they had a lot of production related items to include dozens and dozens of Polaroids for continuity. This was, of course, pre-digital camera days. At that time, cell phones were corded to the battery pack which had to be worn as a fanny-pack because it was so freakin' heavy.
wv: trize
This is the coolest comment I ever read on a thread.
Does this mean we are all one person removed from Madonna?
And, believe it or not, there are women on my side who care about how they look and who are decent in their treatment of men.
I don't just believe it, I know it as fact actually.
Men have other alternatives, honey, than just putting up with bitches.
I agree with that, honey pie. Thanks for the entertaining rant though.
Two years ago, walking through the NC State Fair I saw some Secret Service guys. They stood out from the usual fair crowd like sore thumbs. So then I looked around to see who they were protecting, and it was none other than David Price, the local communist congressman. I think there might be an inverse relationship between how important a congress critter thinks he is and how important he actually is. I imagine he will be at the fair again this year - once again, time to go out and glad hand the plebes.
Also, saw Merlin Olson walking through and airport once, recognized him, let him walk by in peace. Oh, and I saw Rudy Nureyev in Central Park back in the 60s.
That is all.
On Ray Bradbury Theater, there was an episode where a film crew was working in some small Mexican village. They treated the villagers more like set decoration and local color than like human beings. So one villager (played by the talented Gregory Sierra) protested in his own humble way: every time the camera started rolling, he worked his way into the scene -- and dropped his pants. Eventually, the producers pulled the plug on the shoot and shot on a sound stage.
Somehow, I doubt this form of protest would slow down a Madonna film.
Isn't she supposed to be a saint to you guys or something? Kinda like Rogaine and Sully?
That's nothing. I once ran into Ruth Anne Adams in a motel in Beaver Dam, Wisconsin.
Discretion prevents me from saying more.
I was born and raised in Santa Monica; have lived here all my life. I have worked in high end gift retail in S.M. and Brentwood for over thirty years and met and dealt with probably a couple dozen acting Oscar winners and G-- knows how many TV stars...98% of them are friendly and easy to do business with...it's the remaining 2% that you can do without.
I've been in the Rock 'n' Roll Witness Protection Programme for some while, so I have to refrain from name-dropping.
Now I know why my buddy left Brooklyn and moved to St. Croix. He saw what was coming and couldn't take it anymore. Another Madonna film? Oy!!!
I once walked past Leonardo DiCaprio in an alley in SOHO. There was a dumpster nearby and nobody else around. Unfortunately, I realized too late who it was and the opportunity slipped away.
Lem said...
I danced with Halley Berry at the Bat back in the mid 90's. I didn't realise who she was until somebody mentioned it and she was long gone.
Damn it, Lem!!! That possibilities!!! OH MAN!!!
I kissed Dottie West once. I was 12. She tasted like a 3 day old wet ash tray.
"And why is downtownlad so mean to Palladian."
Maybe it's revenge on behalf of ZPS (who seemed to end up on the loosing side of his jabber w/ Palladian)?
DTL must really like Madonna.
Palladian, will you do a voice recording of how you said it?
Haha, Trooper.
I also learned today that I am once person away from Tucker Carlson.
It doesn't get better than this.
Ruth Anne Adams was actually quite a bit taller than I would have guessed from her avatar.
Palladian, somewhere in Crown Heights? From the way you describe the neighborhood it sounds like Franklin Avenue at Eastern Parkway, but I haven't seen any sign of a shoot around here lately.
I used to have a UPS delivery guy whose claim to fame is that he banged Wendy the Snapple Lady.
To this day the sight of a Snapple bottle makes him pee himself just a little.
@TrooperYork
re: Kevin Bacon,
You realize this makes you all 2 degrees of Kevin Bacon don't you?
wv: coured
I saw Paul Hornung at the airport in Philly and saw Wilt The Stilt at his sports bar in Boca or West Palm [forget which]. I saw Brent Musberger in Norleans before the Super Bowl in 1981.
I saw Marla Maple [name? of Trump's wife] in AC during the Miss America pageant. She is one 6ft tall hottie!
@TrooperYork
Then you and I have 1° and 2° and the rest are 2²°?
I've seen Althouse and Meade drive by.
I bumped into Sara Jessica Parker in the stables at Pimlico last year.
During my hard core gym days, I ran into Sylvester Stallone at the gym, in the early morning hours, while he was in Seattle filming "Assassins".
What is different about my encounter is that since Stallone was so much shorter and smaller than he was on the big screen, I just thought it was a guy that LOOKED like him! It was not until later someone said "hey, have you seen Stallone around the gym?" When I ran into him, it was so early that he and I were the only ones on the floor. I was THIS close to going up to him to say: "has anyone ever told you that you look like Sylvester Stallone?" To this day, I wonder how he would have responded to me had I done that.
I saw him a few times in the gym after that, when it was busy. I never saw anyone conduct themselves with such self-absorption before - it was as if the other 100 people in the gym simply were not there.
AND - he has shitty gym etiquette- TERRIBLE! He always left the big plates on the squat rack or leg press. Total asshole in that regard.
I once used Sam Wateston's toilet. It had a lousy flush.
"I bumped into Sara Jessica Parker in the stables at Pimlico last year."
Did you give her an apple?
Circa winter 1970 bumped into Telly Savalas in lobby of London Hilton--was wearing a brown turtle-neck, brown & yellow paisley bell-bottoms & soft ankle hi brown leather boots. Had a few drinks with him--he had been doing movies in Europe & was headed back to US. Said had to get out of movies as he was forever type-cast as a "crazy." (and was) Said his agent had wrangled him the lead in a new cop TV series where he got to wear shark-skin suits and shoot in NYC. Said it looked promising. LOL The rest, as they say, is history..
Did you give her an apple?
No, she's a carrot girl.
How I came to shake hands w. Bruce Springsteen (I am NOT a fan):
Spring of '72 I'm teaching a lecture survey course at Univ of Southwestern La., Lafayette, La., where there is a quiet, foxy little brunette from N.O. in back of class. Her demeanor makes my fighter-pilot (ex) 6th sense mark her down as a "player." Fast forward to fall '75 at apt party in New Orleans in honor of frat. brother in from Sandy Eggo. Decide to all go down to the Maple-Leaf bar to catch second set of Erma Thomas who was playing that night. My wife and I, feeling no pain, and having gotten in late, are holding up back hall wall watching Irma. Suddenly I become aware of voice from person standing along wall next to me: "Why hello, Prof.----- funny seeing you here. Let me introduce you to my date, Bruce Springsteen." Sure enough, next to her was Bruce, in town for a concert earlier in the evening. He and I reach across Penny (the fox) and shake hands. Bruce is dressed in trademark jeans, white T-shirt and cigs rolled up in left sleeve. "LOL" I said to myself. "with a million groupies in town lusting after his body and my little gal is the one that managed to snare him--I sure can pick 'em!"
I saw David Carradine in a bar at the Phoenix airport the year before he died. The bartenders were required to card every customer and he got perturbed at that and said "Jesus Christ I am 70 years old".
I once bumped into Robert Reich, when he was Labor Secretary, at Fresh Pond in Cambridge, MA. He was on a bike, stopped, and looked especially dorky in his helmet. I told him that I was an employee of a business and that what I most needed as a "laborer" was for the federal government to reduce its stranglehold on the free market. He smiled politely and said he appreciated my point of view. Actually, quite classy.
And now one that a friend of mine experienced (he claims). He was in the market that used to be in Central Square in Cambridge (I believe it was a Purity Supreme, but may have been a Star), turns down an aisle, and there is Julia Child .... her shopping cart filled with junk food - chips, Pepperidge Farm cookies, candy, the works!
My friend is known for hyperbole, so perhaps this is not 100% true, but I sure hope it is.
Virgil,
I used to live on 15th St in Manhattan between 7th and 8th Avenues. A lot of the scenes from Kojak were shot on that block and the pizza shop in Kojak was located at the corner of 18th and 7th Ave. You never knew when you walked out the door if they would be shooting a scene that day or not. There were a lot of typical brownstones on that block and it was to New York looking. The people working on that show were pretty good about not getting in the way of the residents and they tried not to interfere too much. The biggest problem was with the people who had cars there. It was one of the few blocks around there where you could park cars. Most of the others had no parking.
"My friend is known for hyperbole, so perhaps this is not 100% true, but I sure hope it is."
I doubt it's true, at least the junk food part. She famously didn't snack between meals except for a spoonful of peanut butter. Why buy junk food when both her and her husband were excellent cooks, and doing it all the time for recipe testing and development?
She did dally with instant potatoes, arguing that they could be made perfectly palatable with the addition of butter and cream. But then, what can't?
Milanos.
Obviously you've never tried one of my Milano, unsalted butter and heavy cream smoothies.
Palladian just restored my faith in the city. Just when I thought New Yorkers were pussing out here comes Palladian with a "hearty fuck you" to Madonna. Dis is New Yawk baybeee!
My best story is a John Goodman one. A couple of years pre-Katrina (John lives in N.O.) I occasioned to drop some paperwork off at an ins agency in a small block of 2-story office bldgs on right-hand side of Canal street just prior to the cemeteries. There is a quite popular/locally famous bar located on the corner. As it was 3pm and having nothing else on my sched., I popped in for a cool one. As I was sitting at the bar in walks John w. his bodyguard. John sits down beside me and begins animated conversation with his bodyguard to his left. I bided my time until conversation petered out. Rather than acting like a gushing fan/tourist I thought I'd play it cool and casually say for openers: "Say, who IS that guy in those Foster Grants!" (after the old ad campaign for FG sunglasses) Went RIGHT OVER his head. He picked up his sunglasses and said: "No, these are Ray-Ban Wayfarers, actually" (I knew them well as I had worn them in college in the 60s) But LOL, my hip intro was blown! Nothing like trying to explain a joke that falls flat! But I did anyway...John was really nice..."oh yeah"..."I'd forgotten about those ads," he said. We proceeded to have a nice some 30 min conversation.,,
Am I the only one who thinks that Palladian acted like a colossal bore? If he has a problem with people using his neighborhood for a shoot, take it up with the city. Instead he acts like a jerk to everybody who he sees, and then congratulates himself for doing so. Whatever.
Yes Steve, you are the only one.
I worked in the coffee shop at a driving range in California, back in the late '70s, frequented by all manner of past and present Hollywood insiders. It was a great place for a kid who loved old films, listening to the oldtimers discuss the Golden Age of H'wood.
George Tobias, a character actor who was in darn near everything, talked about working with Jimmy Cagney in Yankee Doodle Dandy and Bogart in Devil's Island.
Songwriter Harry Warren -- best known for Atcheson, Topeka and the Santa Fe, Chattanooga Choo Choo, Lullaby of Broadway, and about 795 more -- chatted with my Dad as I listened quietly, soaking it all in.
Jack Albertson did a soft shoe, using his golf club like a cane, twirling and spinning as he grinned at the fellas drinking their coffee.
I remember pouring Telly Savalas a cup of coffee; it was 37 cents (including tax) and he paid with a $5, telling me to keep the change. Biggest tip that teenager ever got.
Bob Hope, Clint Eastwood, Ginger Rogers; they all seemed to end up at my counter.
I can't recall ever having an unpleasant encounter with any of them. A classy, unpretentious bunch.
I got the chance to meet Princess Stephanie in Acapulco in 1991. She was very nice and cheerful. She was there since she was one of the singers singing at the music festival. :)
No photo to prove it?? Well then I yelled at Obama too!
I was recently on a flight from Atlanta to Orlando seated in first class. As the doors were just about to close on comes this guy carrying a duffel bag draped over his shoulder. He managed to drag it on top of the heads of about six of us as he made his way to his seat in the first row.
I was pretty pissed off, but didn't say anything.
As we disembarked it turned out the miscreant was none other than Charles Barkley. I thought he acted like an entitled ass.
I changed my mind when we got to baggage claim. Our flight had about 30 military in uniform. Barkley patiently stood and got his photos taken with every one of them, plus a variety of group shots. Good for him. He didn't need to do it. It was a nice selfless act.
A selfless act to have his picture taken with people who are risking their lives, losing limbs, and receiving traumatic brain injuries? Nice of HIM? Why, because what he does with his day is so very important?
Yowza.
So you had to point out the race of half the people you talked to and called a woman you didn't know "honey"?
Oh and you don't understand how a film permit works and that they HAVE THE RIGHT to close a sidewalk to close a sidewalk for the safety and efficency of the film shoot.
Maybe you should fuck off. Self-important racist sexist hipster prick boy.
"So you had to point out the race of half the people you talked to and called a woman you didn't know "honey"?"
I didn't point out the race of anyone I talked to, and I must have missed the memo that merely mentioning the race of people in order to provide some details about the interesting mix of people at the scene is now racist.
As far as the supposed permit goes, there was NO prior posting of the standard signs that indicate a film shoot was going to occur on that day, so no one in my immediate neighborhood had any prior warning that our street was going to be occupied. This would have made a difference. I'm sure they had permits, but I believe they strayed further south than they had intended and were unprepared for the pedestrian and vehicular traffic on my particular street.
Also, I have never seen a film shoot as poorly organized and chaotic as this one. Film shoots usually have clear boundaries and well-informed (and usually polite) production assistants to help direct pedestrians. This one did not. NO ONE seemed to know what was going on, and worse, the P.A.s that seemed to know the least were the rudest. It wasn't just that it was difficult to walk down the sidewalk, it was that people were telling me that I couldn't enter my building!
A film permit in New York City does NOT grant the production company the right to bar residents and pedestrians from using the sidewalk.
It is shown how educated and polite this "person" is. Even if it hadn't been Madonna, he shouldn't have spoken that way. It is, also, sad to see how american people become more and more uncivilized, arrogant, pushy and "naca". She is Madonna and a woman; she deserves respect as anyone else (and I would say more). Poor person who attacked the others verbally (that's what is happening right now; no respecting others and believing that you are superior)
Oh no Shouting Thomas! Hillary is dowdy? Madonna is ugly? How dare they show their faces in public, let alone pursue (and achieve) success in their chosen fields. Your comment argues 'eminently' that the emancipation of women must still be pursued.
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