June 18, 2009

"I woke up when he was starting to tattoo my nose. ... I counted 56 stars, it is frightening."

"I explicitly said in my native tongue, French, and also in a little bit of English when he looked confused, that I wanted three little stars only near my left eye."



Don't fall asleep in the tattoo parlor. Don't rely on a verbal description of the tattoo you want when you are speaking a foreign language. Don't get tattoos when you are a teenager. Don't get tattoos on your face. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't.....

And now a word from the tattoist:



Yikes! I know what you're thinking. Don't let anyone who looks like that do anything to your face. But wait. Listen to him:
"She was awake and looked into the mirror several times as the procedure was taking place... The trouble all started when she went home and her father and boyfriend threw a fit... They are saying things now like I doped her or hypnotised her. What rubbish. She asked for 56 stars and that's what she got."
This is a lawsuit, people.

The girl, Kimberley Vlaeminck is suing the small businessman, Rouslan Toumaniant. Who do you think is telling the truth?

***

Why would anyone ask for 56 stars? Maybe it's for the stars on the flag, one for each of the states, or maybe... I think... one left to go... one left to go...

145 comments:

David said...

One for each of the 56 states?

(I don't buy her story for a second.)

Anonymous said...

It's not like she wouldn't NOTICE he's adding 53 stars too many. You do feel something when getting tattooed and, well, the time it took to do it would be markedly longer for, roughly, 18 times more stars than you initially asked for.

rhhardin said...

Maybe get some cloud tattoos to obscure the stars.

rhhardin said...

She'll never be able to wear a ``I'm with stupid'' tee shirt.

American Liberal Elite said...

Maybe she can find room for a large capital "L" on her forehead.

Colin said...

Having been recently acquainted with a relative who (for some reason that escapes me) got a particularly large and intricate tattoo, I find it difficult to believe that one could fall asleep naturally during the procedure. I've never had it done myself, but had it described as continually poking a severe sunburn with a sharp needle.

bearbee said...

He (or she) whose face gives no light, shall never become a star.
..........William Blake

So cheer up Gloomy Gus! All sorts of positives:

There is Star Jones and now Star Vlaeminck.

She could audition for Dancing With the Stars, Star Trek, Star Wars, Starbucks commercials or as Jiminy Cricket

Good cover for teenage pimples and acne.

She could marry her tattoist and continue their work together.

Bissage said...

Those stars look okay to me.

All she needs is a theme song and it all comes together.

See the Constellation.

Just a guy made of dots and lines, indeed.

bearbee said...

ps......you don't hear this guy complaining

Meade said...

"Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't....."

Okay. Just to be clear. When you say "don't" like that, don't you really man "do?"

You do... don't you?

Or do you?

Xmas said...

Oh...as far as face tattoos go, those aren't bad at all...

It's kinda "Suicide Girl"-ey. I've always interpreted those 5-pointed stars to scream out, "I get drunk and kiss other girls!"

(God, I hope none of my friends with 5 pointed star tattoos read that...)

Robert Cook said...

She's lying. There's no way one could fall asleep while having one's face tattooed, particularly for as long as it would take to have 56 stars done. As the tattooist asserts, once her father and boyfriend objected, she had to assign blame away from herself.

The tattoo artist could, however, have avoided any dispute had he followed the rule that I have heard other tattooists recite: they will not tattoo anyone's hands, feet or faces unless they know them, or unless the client is already so heavily tattooed over their body that he or she already has experienced what living with a marked body entails.

Bob said...

I think I read in one account that a witness corroborated the tattooist's account. Having said that, he was a fool not to have a permission form on hand to cover this sort of situation. Were I a tattoo artist (all the gods forbid) I wouldn't do any work on someone's face without a signed and witnessed disclaimer form. He's said as much, himself.

As for the girl, I wonder if you connected the stars, would they spell out dumbass?

KCFleming said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
KCFleming said...

Around 535 AD, a massive volcanic eruption blew Java-Sumatra into two separate islands. Krakatoa's long muffled explosion was heard far away, in Nanking. Soon, and all over the world, the sun began to go dark, the rain poured red, and yellow dust fell like snow.

The ensuing cold, drought, floods, famine, plague, and death ushered in the fall of Rome and the Dark Ages. Years later, a Chinese bureaucrat lamented these horrors in a poem, asking, "How could God have been so drunk?"

When God gets a tattoo, the face of the world changes, and everything is lost but translation.

Moose said...

Sigh.

And people like this go on to reproduce.

Jason (the commenter) said...

The next time I have trouble going to sleep I guess all I have to do is stick needles in my face.

Rialby said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rialby said...

One for each state Barack Obama visited on the campaign trail?

Ron said...

It's obvious she's a big Joe DiMaggio fan; she's commemorating his 56 game hit streak in '41.

But if she looked like that, Toots Shor would have throw her out of his bar!

Hoosier Daddy said...

Evidently they do things differently there. Every tattoo I got they put a template on, showed it to me, made sure it's what I wanted, placement etc and then did the ink job.

Although I never understood the whole face tattoo and piercing thing. That shit's freaky.

bearbee said...

If her lawsuit is successful, he could put him out of business.

He will have to put on a suit and tie and look for a job.

Photoshop please.

BTW another opportunity (when will they stop!) for Star Vlaeminck ...... Astrologer to the Stars.

Hoosier Daddy said...

I bet that hurt like a bitch too.

Fred4Pres said...

I find tatoos on women unattractive. That is just me.

traditionalguy said...

Somebody needs to tell these people that Tatoos are all ugly defacements of human beauty. Why does culture today honor this sick pagan practice? Tell the down and outers to deface public walls with graffiti if they need to create uglyness around them. That can be painted over.

Hoosier Daddy said...

I find it difficult to believe that one could fall asleep naturally during the procedure. I've never had it done myself, but had it described as continually poking a severe sunburn with a sharp needle.


Not quite that bad although it depends on where you have it. The ones I have on my shoulders didn’t hurt at all that bad. The ones on my back, particularly the one on the middle hurt like a sonofabitch.

Fleshy=little pain. Near bone=makes you cry like a pussy.

If she truly fell alseep then she’s one tough little Walloon.

MadisonMan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Wince said...

Vlaeminck is suing Toumaniantz for "the nightmare," seeking about $17,000 — half the cost — to have the tatts removed by laser.


I'd pay it and be rid of this idiot.

Oh, and get a signed release this time.

MadisonMan said...

The best advice -- was it from Brian Setzer, lead singer of the Stray Cats? -- re: tattoos: Never get one that you can't cover up with a nice dress shirt if you have to stand in front of a judge.

KCFleming said...

The chief astrologer for Belgium's Alternative Medicine Division soon found that Kimberley Vlaeminck's tattoos served as an able and handy reference.

The Dude said...

Dude needs more shit jammed into his face.

Hoosier Daddy said...

The best advice -- was it from Brian Setzer, lead singer of the Stray Cats? -- re: tattoos: Never get one that you can't cover up with a nice dress shirt if you have to stand in front of a judge.



Or a job interview. Good advice though. My rule has always been when deciding on a new one is to hang a picture of the design I want on my monitor at work that way I see it every day. If I still like the look 4 months later then I'll get it.

Once you start putting them on your face and neck or get sleeves, you're pretty much confining your career to being a barista at Starbucks or working at Barnes and Noble.

commoncents said...

Interesting post Ann! Keep up the great work!
COMMON CENTS
http://www.commoncts.blogspot.com

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

It's full of stars!

2001 A space Odyssey

X said...

I'll need to see a before picture to form a judgement

prairie wind said...

I think the stars look kind of cool. The artist (oh, why did you have to show him to me?) placed them beautifully. I'd love to go to a Fourth of July picnic with those stars...as long as I could wash them off after.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Maybe she wanted a litter of stars.
So instead of giving her a star we should ask for one.

MadisonMan said...

oh, why did you have to show him to me?

Really. He looks like he's trying to become a Gorn, or something.

PWS said...

Why does this have the tag, "lawsuits I hope will fail"?

We don't know what happened? It seems a little early to make a judgment on credibility through a news article, n'est-ce pas?

Maybe she's right?

Why be against the plaintiff w/o all the facts?

Anonymous said...

Next thing you know, she'll also claim that the tattooist did a triangle piercing as she slept.

Peter

knox said...

The tatoo trend has stuck around lot longer than I ever thought it was. Took my kids to the pool the other day and so many people have them. It still surprises me when I see some kids parents with tramp stamps or piercings.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Maybe she's right?

She fell asleep getting tattoed!!??

Come to NY, I got a bridge just for you.

KCFleming said...

Very few stories end well that begin, "When I woke up...."

Insomnia intercepts the illustrated man.

Anonymous said...

As a dermatologist I know once said " a tattoo is skin rape."

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

It was the Inca in her.

A.W. said...

mmm, if you fall asleep while getting a tatoo, you really have no right to whine about what you get when you wake up, especially if there is a language difference.

And, um, aren't those things supposed to be painful?

but her best mode of attack is the freaky boy tatoo artist. clearly he has issues and maybe he was acting on those issues when he tatooed her.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

She is really cheating you know.

Instead of her 15 minutes like the rest of us get she gets 56?

It’s an outrage.

Roger J. said...

I am fascinated by the whole tattoo thing--in 25 or 30 years there will be a whole clutch of grandmas who gather their grandchildren at their knees only to hear them say: "Great tatts, granny."

And my opinion: the woman is lying like a rug.

MadisonMan said...

The big business opportunity of the future: Permanent tattoo removal

TMink said...

What a shame, she was a beautiful girl.

Trey

Hoosier Daddy said...

The big business opportunity of the future: Permanent tattoo removal


I think Obama's porkulus bill set aside a few million for tattoo removal in Cah-leefornia.

Actually I heard an ad the other week on the radio for some kind of cream that will over time fade out tattoos. The by line was for 'tattoo remorse.'

Anonymous said...

The tattoo tide is just starting to turn. Due to illness I've been watching a lot of late night cable TV junk. Amongst the Sham-wow, get rich through real estate, and male 'enhancement' rip-off commercials there is one now for 'easy' tattoo removal. Just slap on some magic oil or unguent for 3-4 for weeks and that unsightly Tasmanian devil on your neck will disappear. I think we can expect see more of these 'easy-off' commercials in the future. This is just the first indicator of a lot of people who regret their ink jobs. Plastic surgeons who specialize in laser removal will be making a mint in the coming years. The armed forces ,in particular the Marines and Army, will not recruit anyone with unsightly tats. Those having them now are grandfathered.

Hoosier Daddy said...

and male 'enhancement' rip-off commercials


Wait...you mean those don't work?

@*@#&#^&*!)_)_(@&^^!!)*^^^^^!!^%$#

KCFleming said...

"LarsPorsena said...
As a dermatologist I know once said " a tattoo is skin rape.
"

Metaphorically then, the tattoo artist should be brought to a shotgun wedding, hanged, or sent to Australia with the other convicts.

Roger J. said...

Re male enhancement and enzyte--I idolized Bob--like Hoosier, I feel totally violated and used.

Unknown said...

traditionalguy --

"Somebody needs to tell these people that Tatoos are all ugly defacements of human beauty. Why does culture today honor this sick pagan practice?"

Your personal opinion doesn't make a truth.

Republican said...

You cannot sleep through 56 tattoos to the face.

She is simply suffering from buyer's remorse.

Anonymous said...

If she is suffering from buyer's remorse what is her 'artist' suffering from?

kjbe said...

"Why would anyone ask for 56 stars?"

Would that even be a question the tattoist would ask?

I'm believing the tattoist, here. I'm sure he's seen (other that the mirror), stranger things...

AlphaLiberal said...

What a dumb dumb trend.

But every successive generation has a harder and harder time outraging their elders.

KCFleming said...

And when Rip Van Winkle finally woke up twenty years later, he rubbed his eyes and saw that he was covered in tattoos from head to toe. But little did he know that fashions in the glen had changed dramatically from earlier times.

No longer were skulls and dragons and fire and buxom babes the pride of men and ladies alike, but instead the text from favorite quotes, long speeches, and even entire books were preferred. Oddly, all were done in Comic Sans font.

Starting on his forehead, and cascading to his toes, were inscribed in multicolor hues the The Beatles biography, complete with song lyrics.

Only on discovering where the footnotes were placed did his senses become overpowered, and soon he was tempted to repeat the draught; and though he reiterated his visits to the flagon often, he quaffed the liquor in profound silence.

Ralph L said...

Of course, her real problem is that she's Belgian. It'll take a big laser to fix that.

TitusWantsYouToFight said...

I just took a really greasy dump.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Tattoos and piercings are cool to when they're on the Oingo Boingo tribe from Xisonbutu.

When some white chick gets them they're a stupid trend.

Elliott A said...

Someone who would deface themselves in such a manner must have some deep seated emotional issues. Of course, they are not considered issues when the government pays for your health care.. It makes you wonder what she's got elsewhere....

Unknown said...

Pogo --

"Oddly, all were done in Comic Sans font."

Laughed out loud.

jen said...

"Somebody needs to tell these people that Tatoos are all ugly defacements of human beauty. Why does culture today honor this sick pagan practice?"

So, you object because you happen to think it's ugly? Or, you think it's ugly because of your religious beliefs?

You do realize that both tastes and religious beliefs vary?

Dust Bunny Queen said...

I am fascinated by the whole tattoo thing--in 25 or 30 years there will be a whole clutch of grandmas who gather their grandchildren at their knees only to hear them say: "Great tatts, granny."

As a teenager, my daughter wanted to get a tattoo or a piercing on her nose.

I said to her.."Just imagine how that is going to look when your skin is all saggy and baggy like Mrs. XXX(the ancient lady next door who looked like a reconstituted mummy). The tattoo will be all smeared and wrinkled and the hole in your nose will be gigantic. Just look at her pores!! You'll probably have to use Q-tips to clean the crusted boogers out of it. But go ahead if you want to. Just remember I'M not paying for it either."

End of conversations was her going ...."Ewwwwwww." No tattoo or piercing.

Ralph L said...

I can understand those of us with odd features or body shapes or bad skin (I've got all three) getting tattoos as a distraction, but I can't figure out the motivation for good looking people.

goesh said...

I can understand just tiny, tiny bit why religious fanatics want to see many of us put against a wall and shot - seriously, I do not regard myself as being prejudicial but I must say, I would probably be looking for a pistol upon seeing that freakish guy

Richard Dolan said...

The articles in the British press suggest that the tatoo parlor is in Courtrai, Belgium, as are apparently all the players. So there's no call to look at this through an Obama-centric prism.

Ann wishes this suit a quick and well deserved end. But, in essence, it's just a breach of contract claim -- she says she ordered three stars and got 56 instead. He says she got what she ordered. The contract was apparently entirely oral. Sounds routine to me, despite the odd-ball setting. I assume that the legal drama is playing out in a Belgian court, but don't know offhand whether the Belgian civil code adopts a 'loser pays' principle for litigation costs, as in the UK and elsewhere in the EU. If it does, that's likely to bring it all to a swift end.

An interesting question would be whether the tatoo guy's appearance was itself enough to amount to a disclaimer of all warranties, express or implied. Such disclaimers themselves normally have to be both express and in a form calling them to the attention of the consumer-customer. The case calls out for a Cardozo to shed light where only darkness now reigns.

Ralph L said...

goesh said...
I don't like to see anyone hurt and I wish her well

Trying to reconcile these 2 comments....Your reaching for a pistol doesn't sound like self defense.

KCFleming said...

In retrospect, Kimberley Vlaeminck agrees that the many tears shed over her perm back in 2005 were indeed an over-reaction.


As for tattoos, neither a borrower nor a lender be.

Freeman Hunt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
summer anne burton said...

The armed forces ,in particular the Marines and Army, will not recruit anyone with unsightly tats. Those having them now are grandfathered.

Source? I know several servicemen who have full sleeves.

People who object so violently to tattoos in general weird me out. No one is asking you to get a tattoo, so why the hell do you care what anyone else does?

This girl is clearly lying and there is no way anyone could fall asleep while getting their face tattooed. Why would he drug her? Ink and time for a tattoo artist = $$.

Freeman Hunt said...

Imagine going to lunch with him and having to watch him eat.

Chip Ahoy said...

Your many harsh and critical and unsympathetic remarks regarding this case along with your wit and bon mots have cheered me greatly this morning.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Trois petites étoiles is not that easily confused with cinquante-six étoiles. Maybe it was the près de mon oeil gauche as her hand motion indicated the entire left side of her face that threw him off.

Pour dormir ? Je ne pense pas.

It amuses me tremendously when people do stupid things. It fills me with glee that the invisible hand of justice has an apparent sense of humor and a mean streak.

Anonymous said...

My first few months of residency were in a medical examiner's office and one of the things I did was to an external exam on bodies waiting to be autopsied - look for identifying marks like scar, tattoos, needle tracks. So, tattoos kind of remind me of that experience. Kind of a negative connotation, you might say.

Also, you can see the tattoo ink within macrophages in lymph nodes, and if you are looking for melanoma (a type of skin cancer) tumor cells in a biopsied node, you could have trouble, because you could potentially confuse the melanin pigment with the tattoo pigment. Well, not easily, if you are experienced. The pigment looks different, and of course, melanin would not be red or blue.

summer anne burton said...

This is much worse than her stars...

Anonymous said...

"People who object so violently to tattoos in general weird me out. No one is asking you to get a tattoo, so why the hell do you care what anyone else does?"

Well, maybe those people are weirded out by the way the tattoos look and don't want to look at them. Again, kind of agnostic.

Here is a reference for what I was talking about earlier:

Hand (N Y). 2008 Sep;3(3):282-5. Epub 2008 May 8 : Tattoo pigment interpreted as lymph node metastasis in a case of subungual melanoma.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

People who object so violently to tattoos in general weird me out. No one is asking you to get a tattoo, so why the hell do you care what anyone else does?


Getting a small discrete tattoo is one thing. Getting your face and body disfigured permanently as the examples in this article is completely another.

Making such a radical irrevocable decision is indicative of a person who hasn't mastered long term thinking, planning or any logical realization of the consequences of their actions. These are not stable or rational personalities. As such, if I were looking to hire for a position, the heavily tattooed person already has several strikes against them. If I were to see a monstrosity like the tattoo artist on the street, I would most certainly make my move to avoid that person at all costs, since it is obvious that they are not stable, normal, rational individuals. The only good thing is that they have advertised themselves as such and it makes it easier to figure it out.

So, Summer...do what you want: but be prepared to face the consequences. I won't hire you. I won't socialize with you. I won't trust you.

You have literally, painted yourself into a corner. I hope you like it.

Freeman Hunt said...

The lawsuit will fail, the father will grumblingly shell out the money for his daughter's tattoo removal, and hopefully a lesson will have been learned.

Big Mike said...

I won't hire you. I won't socialize with you. I won't trust you.

@Dust Bunny, I wish you hadn't posted that. I'm sure that even now there is some liberal has read your post and is scrambling to add "or body art" to the list of things one cannot discriminate against.

@Freeman, if I was to counsel the father, I'd suggest forcing the daughter to wait 3 or so years before shelling out to have the tatts removed. Too many young people have trouble grasping the concept of "think before you do" thanks to parents who unfailingly bail them out for their mistakes.

Dutch Canuck said...

This blog seems apropos:

Horrible Tattoos (SFW)

I particularly like the plastic lawn chair.

I am fascinated by the whole tattoo thing--in 25 or 30 years there will be a whole clutch of grandmas who gather their grandchildren at their knees only to hear them say: "Great tatts, granny."


Well, give a thought to what grandad has to look at (NSFW).

Big Mike said...

Just for grins and giggles, could one of you who doubles as a linguist tell me what 56 is in Romanian and what 3 is in French (I already know what 3 is in English. Ha!).

Could be, of course, that young Vlaeminck was falling down drunk at the time, but if tattoo parlors turned away potential customers due to drunkeness then they'd all be out of business.

Unknown said...

"The lawsuit will fail, the father will grumblingly shell out the money for his daughter's tattoo removal, and hopefully a lesson will have been learned."

Wasn't that a Very Special Episode of Blossom?

goesh said...

Ralph!! I assure you the pistol would not be drawn, my hand would be on it as I backed away quickly - I tell you those ring-things in his mouth have me wondering if might want to put people in a stew pot. There are much sharper pencils in this bin who can elucidate on the 2cd Amendment better than I so I won't.

summer anne burton said...

Wow. DBQ, when did I say that I had a tattoo?

But, full disclosure. I do have one: it's the word "heart." on my wrist and it's about two inches long. it's the mark of a friendship that saved my life.

I'm sure people who have "extreme" tattoos don't care if someone as close-minded as you seem to be want to "socialize" with them anyway, so it's a win-win for both sides. As for jobs, that is indeed something that people have to consider. But not everyone needs someone like you to hire them in order to be successful. One of my best friends works for a very successful arborist who has tattoos on his face and about fifteen employees.

As for onparkstreet's example of people who are "weirded out" by tattoos and "don't want to have to look at them", you've made my point. Why would anyone be so moved by the aesthetic decision of a stranger on the street? Get over your phobia or whatever it is and let live.

The world has plenty of room for all kinds of people, including those who want to get their faces painted, and those who want to get botox injected in their cheeks, and those who want to walk around naked with each other, and those who want to dye their hair pink, and those who just want to be totally normal. I jut wish that the latter could leave the others alone.

Anonymous said...

You're awfully thin-skinned for someone who is all 'live and let live', Summer Anne. All I said is that some people don't like the way tattoos look, and, therefore, are weirded out by them. They are entitled to think that, it's a free country. What's the big deal? I don't understand why your emotion response to people who don't like tattoos is somehow superior to other people's emotional responses to tattoos? You do realize you are doing the exact same thing?

Hoosier Daddy said...

do what you want: but be prepared to face the consequences. I won't hire you. I won't socialize with you. I won't trust you..


DBQ, what if I get one of a Tauren warrior named Goomba? Does that get me a waiver? ;-)

I can understand though the attitudes about tattoos. I mean I have several but I'm not covered either and none are visible unless I'm shirtless. It's the extremes like the ones who get their faces marked up or have more metal than skin on them that I think are what people think when they hear tattoos.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Although last year I saw a guy at the community pool who had an asshat (thats a tattoo in the lower back right above the asscrack).

Now that's just wrong.

jen said...

"The armed forces ,in particular the Marines and Army, will not recruit anyone with unsightly tats. Those having them now are grandfathered.
Source? I know several servicemen who have full sleeves."

I read something along those lines a while back, but I thought that part of the definition of "unsightly" was that it was actually visible when wearing a long-sleeve shirt. So the full sleeves might not be an issue if they don't go far enough down on the wrist to be visible under dress uniform...

Unknown said...

The only tattoo I want to see on a woman is 'Property of Zack'.

summer anne burton said...

Dude, onparkstreet, your original comment was in response to my phrasing "violently object to tattoos." The phrase "violently object" brings to mind more -- to me -- than simply not liking it and moving on with your life. This is apparently mostly a semantics argument?

Though I disagree that hating on people for making a personal aesthetic choice is "the same thing" as thinking the haters are being close-minded and shallow.

Anonymous said...

Ah, I see. Yes, it is nothing but a semantic argument, so I respectfully withdraw my last comment.

Also, not a dude :)

knox said...

Wow. DBQ, when did I say that I had a tattoo?

But, full disclosure. I do have one: it's the word "heart." on my wrist and it's about two inches long. it's the mark of a friendship that saved my life.

Sounds interesting! Not.

summer anne burton said...

Twas more of a "duuuuuuude," not meant to be gender specific. More semantics!

summer anne burton said...

Sounds interesting! Not.

Oh, zing.

KCFleming said...

The American, twenty, maybe twenty-one, is tattoo'd like a Maori warrior. He wears numerous metal loops, affixed to nose and ears and eyebrows, like a junk drawer full of washers, Chinese coins, and old keyrings.

He was raised in Iowa, having traveled no further than Chicago for a ballgame, but affects the world-weary pose of post-adolescent angst, the nihilist in Goth boots, the ex-communicant who has never taken communion at all.

He serves coffee or clerks at Hot Topic, if he must work at all. He's BORED, all caps. He makes me think There but for the grace of dog go I, knowing how easily he might have rejected such accoutrements, had he merely a lab or a setter nearby.

But it's quite possible I have misread entirely.

Rialby said...

Richard Dolan: The articles in the British press suggest that the tatoo parlor is in Courtrai, Belgium, as are apparently all the players. So there's no call to look at this through an Obama-centric prism.

Umm... maybe you didn't get the memo - Obama is "sort of God". There are no national boundaries in the realm of transnational progressivism.

Therefore, this is his fault. Where is his tattoo czar? Who will oversee the over- or under-application of ink to the faces of the world?

Cedarford said...

Kimberley Vlaeminck will be the topic of an urban legends story 10 years from now that ends "Yes, this really happened! Yes, she really was that stupid. But she was a Belgian!"

My advice, she IS a good-looking young woman. Reinvent herself. Have 5 stars removed. Come to America and try to become the next Octomom celebrity and say you love America so much you had stars for all 50 states, plus one for Israel or Puerto Rico - depending on your audience or who might hire her for a "reality show.".
She can probably make a living. A very good living.

ricpic said...

How does tattoo boy eat?

KCFleming said...

He filter-feeds krill, much like a whale.

prairie wind said...

I'd just like to say that, when you are bored and decide to tattoo yourself, don't tattoo your wife's name on your forearm and then get divorced and marry my sister and roll up your sleeves for the wedding pictures. Ah, yes, my family has stories about my sister's ex. Mostly, he was a good guy who didn't do well with drinking...or wives...

Ralph L said...

Dutch, the background action on that photo of your grandma is priceless.

I also heard the military is prohibiting tatts that can't be covered, by short sleeves, IIRC. Within the last year?

I guess you have to be over 40 to fully appreciate unblemished skin.

Onparkstreet, when I got melanoma in 1991, a flat dark mole turned into a pink and dark lump and bled a little. I actually felt it before I saw it. In a hot tub on a ski trip.
If a (female) doctor hadn't freaked over my large number of moles several years before, I'd be long dead by now.

ricpic said...

The world has plenty of room for all kinds of people...

True. But doesn't that include room for people who express distaste for tattoos? You're not going to change the minds of those who find tattoos unaesthetic by calling them close minded and phobic. You're not going to change their minds period, no matter what you call them. Ever hear of freedom? The freedom to differ. I'm sure someone as tolerant as you are can come to terms with others right to dislike the tattoos that you like and are free to cover yourself with.

The Elder said...

How does that guy eat soup?

The young woman's story seems to have changed. Perhaps she is a Belgian waffler.

bearbee said...

He is shown on video managing a reasonable speech pattern.

According to her, pain on her nose awakened her. So if she hadn't woken up at 56 stars, he would still be tattooing her?

video

summer anne burton said...

True. But doesn't that include room for people who express distaste for tattoos? You're not going to change the minds of those who find tattoos unaesthetic by calling them close minded and phobic. You're not going to change their minds period, no matter what you call them. Ever hear of freedom? The freedom to differ. I'm sure someone as tolerant as you are can come to terms with others right to dislike the tattoos that you like and are free to cover yourself with.

I don't expect to change anyone's mind. Just stating my own opinion. And yes, I get it, they're staring theirs. This could go on forever, and it could apply to any argument people have, ever. Yes, they're entitled to their opinion, just like I'm entitled to mine that it's stupid to care about other people's tattoos so much, and just like tattooed people are entitled to get tattoos. La-de-da.

Let's find something we can all agree on. Like this tattoo being one of the most amazing things we've ever seen?

KCFleming said...

Summer Anne,

That is indeed one of the finest examples I have ever seen. If I saw it in real life, I would have to hold back an audible gasp.

ricpic said...

A greasy dump isn't a good sign, Titus. Mentioning it to your physician on your next visit would be prudent.

d-day said...

She's lying. I've got a job-killer tat myself. It doesn't hurt as bad as they say, but you sure as hell can't fall asleep during the procedure. Even if you're drunk.

knox said...

Oh, zing.

LOL. It was kind of lame, wasn't it? But it felt somehow appropriate. I mean, "I've just had a life-changing event. I know! I'll go get a tatoo!"

Anonymous said...

TheOtherOne:

""The armed forces ,in particular the Marines and Army, will not recruit anyone with unsightly tats. Those having them now are grandfathered.
Source? I know several servicemen who have full sleeves."

Yep! they are grandfathered in.
Google Army/Marine tattoo policy and see the updates for 2007 and 2007.

Anonymous said...

Crap!! I meant 2006 for the Army policy and 2007 for the Marines.

Ann Althouse said...

"My first few months of residency were in a medical examiner's office and one of the things I did was to an external exam on bodies waiting to be autopsied - look for identifying marks like scar, tattoos, needle tracks. So, tattoos kind of remind me of that experience. Kind of a negative connotation, you might say."

Well, then, please, please, please read the most bloggable story I ever blogged.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

@Summer. I don't violently object to tattoos or folks like Hoosier who have tattoos that are either modest or can be covered by clothing. Many men in the military for generations have gotten tattooed as a rite of passage. My ex husband had tattoos on both of his forearms and upper left back shoulder. My son in law has some small tattooing on his ankles which isn't visible unless he is wearing shorts.

What I was referring to, plainly, in my response was to the type of whole body tattooing and defacement like the two people in this article we are discussing.

It isn't an emotional reaction either. I'm a very logical person and my reaction to people who do this extreme body tattooing and mutilation of their faces is that there is something distinctly WRONG psychologically with them. As such...I avoid people who mumble to themselves in public, urinate on themselves and who have voluntarilly turned themselves into a circus freak show.

I'm sure people who have "extreme" tattoos don't care if someone as close-minded as you seem to be want to "socialize" with them anyway, so it's a win-win for both sides. As for jobs, that is indeed something that people have to consider. But not everyone needs someone like you to hire them in order to be successful. One of my best friends works for a very successful arborist who has tattoos on his face and about fifteen employees.


Fine with me. I'm not interested in socializing with a lot of people for various reasons. My feelings won't be hurt.

As to jobs. Young people have a hard time thinking ahead and to permanenly "paint" yourself out of the ability to earn a living in certain occupations in the future by deliberately mutulating yourself is the sign of a not clear thinking person at all.

My husband tried to hire a guy as a helper, who had done some time in prison and who, while reformed now, was sporting some pretty awesome gang tattoos on his neck and face not to mention all over his body. Guess, what. The clients of my husband refused to hire the young man. Unfair? Yes. Understandable? Double yes. So, a stupid rebellious decision made as a teenager will haunt him for the rest of his life.

Right,not everyone needs someone like me to hire them for a job and I don't just hire anybody either. You don't see very many financial advisors who look like our tattoo artist and there is a reason why. If they want to spend the rest of their lives as menial laborers and eschew any professional occupations....fine. But it isn't anybody's fault but their own.

Ralph L said...

I'm trying to remember how the Saki(?) story ends about the man who had the acknowledged masterpiece of a famous Italian tattoo artist on his back. The authorities wouldn't let him leave the country, pestered him about maintaining his weight, and waited for him to die.
Anyone read it?

Ralph L said...

Tattoos for Bloggers

One of them has the Blogspot "B" obscured by the Wordpress "W".

Maggie Goff said...

Here's the USMC's latest policy on tatoos:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcQxnLFGgjE

traditionalguy said...

Somebody does need to speak the truth to Tatoo Power. Defacing human beauty is like throwing paint on a great masterpiece painting. That is vandalism. So if you like seeing birth defects like cleft palates, and you like seeing faces cut to pieces in a wreck going thru a windshield, then courageously do it to yourself and show off. It is still ugly and some one needs to say it out loud so that the weak minded youth aren't seduced into believing being tatooed makes them popular.

Chip Ahoy said...

If I met a person with the word "heart" tattooed on their wrist, I'd wonder what was tattooed over their heart. Would it be word that directs me to another body part, like a treasure hunt? I'd ask, "How many moves until I get to the juicy bits?"

American Liberal Elite said...

DBQ: "So, Summer...do what you want: but be prepared to face the consequences. I won't hire you. I won't socialize with you. I won't trust you.

You have literally, painted yourself into a corner. I hope you like it."

Exactly!

The Scythian said...

Ann write:

"I know what you're thinking. Don't let anyone who looks like that do anything to your face."

That's not what I'm thinking. I'm thinking that the quality of the tattoos on his face is actually pretty good, and since he's a tattoo artist, he most likely got them either from another artist who liked and respected him enough to trade work with him or from one of his other apprentices.

Both speak well of his skill.

I'd still want to see a book of his work before deciding whether to let him work on me or not, but it's a pretty good first impression.

Lars wrote:

"Crap!! I meant 2006 for the Army policy and 2007 for the Marines."

I was in the Army in 2006, and the changes in the tattooing policy made it more permissive, not less so -- tattoos on the back of the neck and hands, which had formerly been prohibited, became permissible. I don't know about the other services.

Dust Bunny Queen wrote:

"You don't see very many financial advisors who look like our tattoo artist and there is a reason why. If they want to spend the rest of their lives as menial laborers and eschew any professional occupations....fine. But it isn't anybody's fault but their own."

I'm surprised that I have to point this out, but 'our tattoo artist' is a tattoo artist and not a menial laborer. Depending on his level of skill, his clientele, and the location of the shop where he works, it's entirely possible that he's pulling down real money and living at least comfortably.

I mean, I know that your (supposedly) logical prejudice suggests that people with facial tattoos must, by necessity, be failures at life. But I've known enough tattoo artists personally to know that this isn't the case. For all I know, 'our tattoo artist' owns his own home in a modestly fashionable neighborhood and is saving money with the goal of owning his shop in five years... with enough time and money left over to indulge in expensive hobbies like collecting vintage scooters. (That's a short description of the circumstances of one of my best friends, who is also a tattoo artist, and also has tattoos on his face. He always loved tattoos, apprenticed at 17, he has been in the business for like 15 years at this point, and to the best of my knowledge he never had interest in becoming a financial advisor.)

Ralph L said...

A waitress at a restaurant I frequent has a small stud in her cheek. Not very appetizing. Freak boy will never work at food service.

raf said...

The most cogent comment about tattoos I ever heard observed that young women who get tattoos would probably never dream about buying one blouse and wearing it for the rest of their lives.

LoafingOaf said...

I think the tattooist is telling the truth. She got carried away and got in touble when she went home, and is trying to blame it on the tattooist. Most tatooists want their customers to be happy.

I kinda like the stars all over the face thing, except there's a few too many. Okay, a lot too many. She got carried away. But I highly doubt the tattoo parlor put more on her face than she asked for. Believe it or not, but I have found that tattoo parlors tend to run their shops pretty professionally.

summer anne burton said...

If I met a person with the word "heart" tattooed on their wrist, I'd wonder what was tattooed over their heart. Would it be word that directs me to another body part, like a treasure hunt? I'd ask, "How many moves until I get to the juicy bits?"

That sounds pretty fun. As for it's placement's real reasoning: it's my heart on my sleeve... Get it? :) Whoever joked earlier, trying to zing me again, "I've just had a life-changing event. I know! I'll go get a tatoo!" actually has it about right. It's a reminder of a time in my life I didn't want to be able to forget. It has a special meaning to me and my friend and that's pretty much the only reason I have it. I like it. I'm sure it sounds stupid to most people I don't know and that's fine with me.

For some reason, the opinions of strangers in the comments section of Ms. Althouse's blog on the coolness/prettiness/value of my tattoo don't affect me very deeply. I suspect that our tattoo artist would feel the same way about DBQ not wanting to hire him as a financial advisor. Most people who get tattoos -- whether they're little words on their wrist or crazy flames on their neck or anything in between -- are well aware of the supposed "consequences" and they don't give a care. We can probably all agree that the people who aren't aware/prepared are ignorant... C'est la vie!

Methadras said...

Tattoing is painful. Unless she was hopped up on Morphine, there is no way she could have fallen asleep during that. Hey moron, you have needles going through your face to pattern 56 stars. How could not be awake for that? Fucking idiot. Guess your right to self express really manifested itself as a form of stupidity.

The Scythian said...

Ralph L wrote:

"A waitress at a restaurant I frequent has a small stud in her cheek. Not very appetizing. Freak boy will never work at food service."

I don't think that this guy went through a fairly lengthy tattoo apprenticeship and tattooed until he got to the point where he opened his own shop when he *actually* intended to become a waiter all along.

Summer Anne wrote:

"I'm sure it sounds stupid to most people I don't know and that's fine with me."

I think that it sounds stupid to far fewer people that you think. After I got a fairly visible tattoo, friends, family members, and random people in public places all started showing me their tattoos -- or at least telling me their "I chickened out at the tattoo parlor" stories.

For the most part, their reasons were the same as yours -- to commemorate some event or some period in their lives.

"I suspect that our tattoo artist would feel the same way about DBQ not wanting to hire him as a financial advisor."

This guy apparently runs his own shop. For all we know, he's the one out there hiring financial advisors, not the other way around.

jen said...

LarsPorsena said...

Actually, I wasn't the one that asked for a source - I quoted that in order to respond....

summer anne burton said...

As far as the claims made about the military laws becoming harsher, as far as I can tell the Marine Corps did indeed tighten their regulation in 2007. Meanwhile, in 2006 the US Army adopted a much more permissive policy. Here's the first result when I googled "tattoos military".

I really believe the kind of stigma that is associated with tattoos will more or less disappear in the next 30-40 years... Hardly anyone my age associates tattoos -- even 'extreme' tattoos -- with the "psychologically damaged" profile that older people seem to. Many small business owners in my city are heavily tattooed. The hottest young celebrity in the world right now is covered in large tattoos. Not to mention the other one.

But you guys huff and puff about it all you want.

prairie wind said...

I don't keep up with hot young celebrities so I don't recognize them. Who are those girls? The first one is really beautiful. What does her tattoo say?

Will she be a hot celebrity in 20 years? Will she still wear dresses that show off that tattoo?

summer anne burton said...

Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie, respectively. I have no idea what Ms. Fox's career longevity will be -- but man, aging does bad things to skin whether you have tattoos or not. It's like the grandma in the picture way above. Is it really gross because of her tattoos, or is it gross because she's a naked elderly lady whose boobs and stomach are loose, flat flaps hanging over other parts of her body? I think the latter. The tattoos actually might help distract someone from looking at the rest of her.

john said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
john said...

Has anyone mentioned that this whole episode looks and reads like a fake? Something like, say, a radio jock would create?

john said...

Pixar grants girl’s dying wish to see ‘Up’!

OK, total asshole john is predicting this is also a fake story. The fact that it emerged from S. CA is only one of its problems.

John henry said...

When I was in the Navy in the 60's I had a shipmate who had a big M on each cheek of his butt. Ostensibly they stood for Machinist Mate (His Navy occupational specialty. Mine too)

However, when he would bend over in the shower, they spelled out "MoM".

And when he lay on his back with his legs up, they spelled "WoW". Very spectacular when he would light a fart.

John

John henry said...

Here is a great article on Tattoos as a signifier of the criminal class in England by Theodore Dalrymple

http://www.city-journal.org/html/5_4_oh_to_be.html

Not that John

Anonymous said...

Thx Dr. Althouse.

Will read the most bloggable story bloggable when I get a chance...

Unknown said...

I'm a little confused,
i've had a tattoo gun run across my wrist,
and the pain is evident.

The women is lying, obviously.

Falling asleep in a tattoo parlor and not FEELINGS 56 stars run across her face?

I think not...

XWL said...

Time for a follow up post to this one, she recanted her story. Not surprising, really, at least the man she lied about wasn't facing a felony.

She should be prosecuted as fully and completely as the law allows in Belgium for making a false claim, and the tattoo artist should sue her for defamation.

Reputations are not easily mended.

Anonymous said...

Swedish Radio ran a story saying that she was faking and didn't really have all those stars tattoed onto her face.

miller said...

I feel sorry for the tattoo artist: he has no second act.

Unknown said...

This is from Elle magazine (France) JUN 26 2009.
"La fille aux 56 étoiles sur le visage a menti"

pensant que la caméra n'enregistrait pas. Kimberley Vlaeminck confie alors aux journalistes présents qu'elle adore le travail du tatoueur mais que son père était "vraiment très furieux" en voyant le résultat. Elle lui a donc menti et affirmé qu'elle ne s'était rendue compte de rien et a préféré accuser son tatoueur. K.M."

Does this say "When the TV cameras were turned off, Kimberley Vlaeminck then confided to the reporters how she really liked the tattoo artist's work. However, when her dad saw the result, he was "truly very furious." She told him [dad] absolutely that she doesn't remember anything at all and would rather blame the tattoo guy."

My French is pretty bad but isn't that what it says?