February 24, 2009

About my proposed Titus recording.

So I said I wanted to record — and sell — a CD of me reading some of my favorite Titus comments. I hadn't decided if I'd actually do this, so your reaction to the proposal matters to me.

Chuck b. said:
Oh my..!

I would of course include selected tracks in the music program that I play during the cocktail hour before all my dinner parties.

Like everyone else in the world is going to do once this gets in circulation!

Everyone one the coasts, I mean.

Your level of celebrity is about to tick up a notch.
So far, so good. Chuck is with me!

Palladian said:
This is a terrible idea. I can't think of anything more repellent than having to listen to Titus's comments.

But this is the way the wind is blowing around here. Apparently someone's endless commentary about their excrement and their fictive sexual encounters and their ugly dogs is what passes for interesting conversation these days.

Will you include the parts where he insults other commenters? How about when he sexually harasses female commenters, asking about their tits? What about his unfunny faux-conservative rants? Will these all be a part of the collection?

Bleh. Better to make a best-of cd of your late podcast or sell prints of your photographs or squirrel mugs or simply as for donations like Andrew Sullivan used to do?
Uh oh. I don't have Palladian! Why doesn't he appreciate Titus's absurd writings? You won't be listening to Titus. You'll be listening to me. Whatever is repellent about Titus's voice will be transformed. It won't be an attempt to impersonate him, but purely me. I think I can help you see what is so funny about it. As for prints of my photographs, anyone can download the original files and print out whatever they want under the Creative Commons license I have displayed at Flickr. As for donations, my post worked as a request for donations and I got a few. (Thanks!) I'm not desperate for money. That's not my purpose here. I really am in it for the laughs. I was reading some Titus comments aloud — the thing about the sock — and I laughed into hysteria. I'd have a lot of fun making the recording, and I only want to share the fun.... with those who find it fun.

Skeptical said:
I know why Althouse likes Titus's shtick.

Even the lame crap that Titus serves up over and over becomes performance art through his sticking to it over the long haul. When one thinks of the narrative strand that is Titus's 'I squeezed out a loaf this morning, and it had two heads,' etc., picturing it extended in time, itself like an endless loaf shat out of Titus, it has an aesthetic appeal that none of the individual loaf comments even hints at individually. So when Althouse laughs at Titus's loaf remarks, she is laughing at it not on its own, but only as a loaf-moment, if you will, in the unending loaf.
Ha ha.

John Stodder said:
I think the guy's hilarious.... [T]here is something so decorous about the way Titus expresses pride in his creations, I can't help but laugh. There's a generosity about his whole approach here. Obviously, he's one of the commenters who disagrees with the majority, but his stings are gentle and sometimes clever....

But, professor, wouldn't it just be easier for you to write a damn book? You're a pioneer blogger, a pioneer bLAWger, and a pioneer woman blogger. I'm also convinced that you've got one of the few big blogs with political content that isn't essentially dishonest.... Why don't to write a book about this blog, why you do it, what it has added to your life and career, what it's taught you?....
This is something I thought of doing and, in fact, worked on — 100 pages worth — in 2005. I abandoned the project because I didn't like the way it felt to be on the outside observing the thing I was actively doing, as if it had already occurred. To blog is to be constantly in the middle of things. I want to be the blogger, not the memoirist observing me, the blogger. That's not bloggy. This blog may seem to be about me, but it's not. You may be able to see something of me in it, and I know it feels personal. But the fact is, I don't blog about myself. I blog about whatever interests me at any given moment, and I'm not self-absorbed. I want to look out, not in.

Onparkstreet said...
I have to admit, I scroll past the Titus comments because I find them a little bit gross.

And, the funny thing is, I'm trained as a pathologist.
Ha ha ha. That is funny.

Palladian again:
Titus is not just a harmless minstrel in a faggot costume debasing himself for the pleasure of the straights. If you have read enough of his comments (and there are certainly a lot of them), you'll have noticed that there's a deep nasty streak underneath all the "namaste" crap. The titus project is to disrupt any attempt at reasonable conversation and drive away the intelligent commenters and readers. It hasn't totally worked fortunately, but I have to say that my interest in reading the comments on a post drastically diminishes when I see his alias...

"Always wondered why Titus was tolerated."

Unfortunately Althouse's commendable respect for free speech in her comments has allowed some bad-faith commenters to do a lot of damage to the community.

I don't understand the attraction Althouse has for titus's writing. I mean, the first few times he talked about his vapid life and his "rare clumbers" I thought it was amusing. But it quickly got old and quickly became apparent that his intentions were not good-faith performance art....

To me, titus is like a blackface minstrel amusing a crowd of upper-class white people. I'm not entirely comfortable with his clownish and repulsive depiction of a gay man. And I'm still not convinced he's not an entirely fictitious character.
So if I'm amused, then I'm not politically correct, gay-wise?

Jason (the commenter) said:
Always wondered why Titus was tolerated.

I always wondered why Palladian was tolerated. I bet they are the same person!
The plot thickens. But I know Palladian. He couldn't be playing such an elaborate prank on me.

Theo Boehm said:
When Titus writes about some place or thing I know about, it's inevitably misapprehended and cartoonish. It seems, as Palladian points out, as if he's toying with the suckers. His putative sexual escapades are along the same lines, again, per Palladian....

Part of what Titus is about, as has been said, is the making of everything he tells into clownish and unappealing grotesquerie. Althouse reading [some other commenter's porn] would certainly attract attention, but it wouldn't have the same underlying dark and hostile humor, if you want to call it that, of Titus' offerings. The point of porn is to attract; Titus' goal is to repel. I do think, however, there's something to learn in the process.

Althouse has in the past attracted to "comic" characters... who were classic long-range trolls, and whose goal was disruption exactly as Palladian describes. I think Althouse's commitment to free speech assumes that openness toward, and even, in the case of Titus, a co-opting of hostility that is the best way to handle it. She may have a point and a lesson to teach here. Or she may be incredibly naive about the motivations of disruptive people.

Among the many things I have learned in this blog these past years is to never underestimate Althouse, especially in her longstanding role as teacher.
That means a lot and emboldens me.

Penny said:
Two thumbs up for Althouse, two thumbs up for Titus and two thumbs up for Palladian and all the rest of you.

The beauty of Ann's blog is its diversity. She has created an exceptional oasis here, where those who have very different sensibilities can come for a little bit of this, and a little bit of that.

I love politics and law. I love art and photography, and humor, and commenting on headlines. I could go on and on. The best thing that Ann has brought us ALL, is a place where we can virtually sit down and hash nearly ANYTHING out, and nearly always without making those not-like-us our enemies...or worse yet, buffoons.

Face it. Most of us head out on the internet every day for hours. Some might like to spend most of their time listening to those who say EXACTLY what they are thinking. Some take some time to check out msm links, or even the political "opposition". But where the heck do we choose to plop our asses down at the end of a hard day, or a boring day or a so-so kind of day? Right the heck here at Ann Althouse's place.

And why is that? I suggest it is because Ann is OPEN to all of us being EXACTLY the way we are. It is her "gift", and our good fortune, to have found her in this world that is becoming increasingly intolerant.

Please don't screw up what our hostess, Ann, is bringing to the internet.

This fine lady will become famous for opening up her "living room" to all of us. ALL of us.

Count me as one who will be searching out Titus, right after I give Ann a great big hug for keeping us all human.

Money follows value, my dear. And YOU, Ann Althouse, are more valuable than you know.
Aw. Cool. Thanks.

Ralph said...
"Sex and the City" proved there's a market for women talking about dicks. Perhaps Althouse wants to prove there's a market for women talking about shit.
And hog.

Palladian said:
Good Evening fellow republicans and lovers of the Bush Doctrine. Here's my attempt at a titus audiobook. I took all the comments he made in yesterday's "Mauve Cafe" post and performed them in the closest approximation of my impression of titus that I could throw together in 5 minutes. I did a bit of digital post-processing to "enhance" the performance and added an appropriate backing track.
Am I a bad person if that made me laugh until tears ran down my face (even though you tried to make me feel guilty about laughing by using that "gay" voice that only homophobes are supposed to laugh at)? By the way, Palladian left out the funniest part of the sock story, the part that nearly killed me.

Jason (the commenter) said:
Palladian,

Althouse MUST do this!

I never knew you had such a sexy voice. I always read your stuff (out loud to my friends) in a monotone.
Palladian said:
Well... uh, thanks I think. But that's not really what my voice sounds like, the pitch and speed is digitally altered and I was laying on the stereotypical faggotry pretty thickly. But my voice is quite animated and modulated, not a monotone at all.
Darcy said:
Palladian, with that bit of genius, you do realize you probably just guaranteed Althouse doing this, right?
Palladian said:

My God! What have I done!?

Oh, by the way, I am The Arm, and I sound like this...."

[cough]
Jason (the commenter) said...
Palladian,

You're real voice sounds cute! You could have read what Titus wrote with your normal voice and it would have been just as funny.

Clearly, Althouse should do a compilation.

It would be amazing if Matmos could make it into a song, like Tract for Valerie Solanas.

This also shows the genius of Titus. He's growing on me.
Palladian said:
Just like tinea cruris...

Here's my LuckyOldSon/Michael voice.
Penny said:
Althouse is a leader, and shaping us all, simply with her presence.

The fucking beauty here is that she is not shaping us all in her own form.

To whoever up above asked where I came from? Same place as you. I hit a link that FINALLY makes some sense to me.

Philosophical "warrior" in need of some middle place...and YES...even better, a sometimes silly place to set my ass down when I have had enough of "all that".

Thank you, Ann, for allowing my butt to rest here.

So? Does this site make my ass look big?
TitusFreezeFrame said:
Palladian that was brillant.

Wow, the time and energy you have devoted to this is remarkable.

More please!

I laughed my ass off!
Palladian said:
Took 5 minutes each, darling.
TitusFreezeFrame said:
Regardless of how much time it took it was terrific.

I bet you even got a little chuckle doing it, didn't you?

That voice, which I know is embelished, is the voice of my comments.

I love how you pronounced burgurs the same way I spelled it. Amazing....

All and all there is a lot of love here.

And hate I guess-150 comments on me? One commenter was right I don't give a shit...obviously.

What I do think is amusing is if anyone tried to share this with someone outside of this blog.

So there is a commenter who comments about pinching loaves. I am thinking of putting it on a CD (Althouse). I am actually going to tape some of his comments in a very queeny voice (Palladian). Try explaining that to someone at your next company staff meeting.

Also, this place would be boring without me. Just another voice bitching about liberals. Ignore me, although it seems to be hard for some.

And I actually do talk to my friends like I talk on this blog. I think I have mentioned this before but I actually leave recordings on my friends voicemails of me pinching loaves with grunts and groans and everything. They in turn forward them to other friends. I have also called them when I am having sex and let them listen. The trick doesn't know but it is my little way of sharing my life with my friends.

Now I feel a virtual group hug coming on. Don't you?

126 comments:

traditionalguy said...

Encore, Encore!

Hoosier Daddy said...

I'm going to side with Palladian here. I'm not sure what kind of kicks you think folks might get out of listening to someone talk about pinching loaves and expressing his desire for hog and female breasts. If he just stuck with tales of his travels that would be fine. But fart jokes stopped being funny by 8th grade and feces isn't funny at all.

Is the winter up there that bad you're maybe getting some cabin fever and need to get out more?

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I would be lying if I said I have not appreciated Titus David Lynchineske style of writing.

Comparing someone to David Lynch is just about the highest compliment I can give.

ricpic said...

Palladian is learning the hard way that you cannot stop an abomination (or an Obamanation, for that matter) by doing the Cassandra bit. Only full immersion does the trick. When they're buried in loaves, only then will the undiscerning discern and call a halt to Titus' rain of shit.

prairie wind said...

This is so weird. Surely I'm not the only one who thinks that Titus is Ann? Like Maxine (is that what her name was?) was Ann.

Knock yourself out, Althouse.

Bob said...

William Shatner reading Titus' comments for sale as a CD would be worth listening to, even buying. Althouse reading them, not so much. Sorry, Ann.

Anonymous said...

Surely I'm not the only one who thinks that Titus is Ann?

I've always assumed Titus was really Cedarford, and that Althouse's blog was the only place he could really be himself. Or both himselves.

Have to say I'm with Palladian on this. But then I learned long ago that for me, Titus was a commenter I could skip over without regret, and Palldian was a commenter I never wanted to pass by.

Skeptical said...

I would like to nominate myself for the prize for the highest Althouse mentions/Althouse comments ratio.

I listened to Palladian's Titus audiobook again, and it does indeed kill. Dear Lord that's funny. Palladian, my man, I salute you.

Ron said...

Let me put it this way: I don't read Titus because you've trained me to not read Titus. I almost quite on reading blogs and this one in particular when the 'Titi' were so numerous as to make reading an unpleasant chore. But through your policing of the most onerous trolls, I've developed a thicker hide, and when the schtick repeats itself, I just gloss over it, without reading it.

It might be funny read aloud, but I doubt it's worth it, so I'll pass.

traditionalguy said...

Professor, you may need a lower class of commenters. The anti-Titus schism is widening rather than group-hugging. Like the anti D H Lawrence reviewers had their point too, Lawrence should not have writen about such bad stuff around pristine readers. Why not just skip past Titus, if you are offended by him? The voyeur instinct is strong, but aren't you stronger? Use your scroll buttons. No harm, no foul. The rest of us will get a few good laughs from his shtick.

Deirdre Mundy said...

I've actually never found Titus's comments funny.

More tragic---

But I've taken them as something serious--the actions and fantasies of a man who wishes there was something more, thinks there OUGHT to be something more, but can't figure out how to find it.

I've always pictured him as 60-70 years old, reliving his glory days online while he slowly fades away, with noone to really love him and nothing to hope for but the inevitable, always approaching, total annihilation of death.

His comments are his desperate cries to a world that's forgotten him and left him alone to age in his apartment.

So everytime I see one, I imagine an old man surrounded by spoiled dogs, trying to make human contact and to remind the world that while he's no longer young and beautiful and desireable, he still exists.....

....poor Titus....

George M. Spencer said...

Now Palladian has taken your business idea and done it for free.

Slavery without the lash.

Article about netbooks in the new Wired...author says he's doing almost everything he used to do with paid software for free now and on a netbook that cost $300. No need to buy Photoshop, MS Office, etc. Goodbye, Apple.

The Great Flattening is coming.

bill said...

You'll be listening to me.

That's a problem. I like your writing, but stopped listening to your podcasts because the voice in my head was better than your actual voice.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

I'm with Palladian and Hoosier. What? You can't be serious.

Who would want to read much less hear the garbage that Titus spews about his excrement and sexual encounters? The only thing he has ever written that is worthwhile is about his dogs and the nice things he says about his parents with whom it seems he has a good relationship.

I seriously, skim and skip over certain posters on this blog and Titus is one of them.

Go ahead and waste your time if you feel like it.

JackWayne said...

Titus is one reason I don't do your comments anymore. He is NOT worth reading. I've almost given up coming to your blog as your commenters seem to be mostly trolls.

Moose said...

Did Ann just have a stroke or something? Someone slip some acid in her raw sugar in the Cafe Prentious?

Good lord - this reminds me of how everyone who knew *anything* thought that Andy Kaufman was trancendent comedy.

Titus is amusing background noise, but hardly worth this level of attention.

Richard Dolan said...

Titus' brand of humor is not for everyone, and I confess that I find it tiresome and adolescent. Having two adolescents at home, I'm not looking for more of the same here. I've been skipping over his comments for a long time.

It's not that scatalogical juvenilia is always a bore but it does take talent to pull it off. Last week, for example, I was reading Catcher in the Rye with my kids (assigned reading for them), a book I hadn't looked at it in decades. They couldn't understand why I found it so hilarious that I could barely get the words out. Perhaps those who find Titus funny are reacting to him as I was to Salinger. The difference may be that they don't have kids at home offering up the same kind of stuff every night at dinner.

Henry said...

Bob wrote: William Shatner reading Titus' comments for sale as a CD would be worth listening to, even buying.

That's on the mark. If Titus is the ticket, only the most over-the-top production will suffice. William Shatner should read Titus in French.

rhhardin said...

Check out Flaubert Temptation of St Anthony, in a passage censored out of my copy, analyzed by Kenneth Burke.

Also Burke's poem, rejected by sensitive poetry editor, here. That would be an alternate Titus.

(I am amazed that I can keyword right to these on the first try at a memory distance of 30 years.)

Ernesto Ariel Suárez said...

Sounds like I have missed all the fun...

kjbe said...

Titus' comments are more like a spice - one of many - that flavor this Althouse stew...and like most spices, looses it's usefulness and flavor when on it's own.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Althouse, if you really feel the need to do it, at least have Barney Frank do the readings so as to set the proper ambience and tone.

MnMark said...

I am open to the idea that there is such a thing as art or humor or whatever you'd call it that Ms. Althouse apparently sees in Titus' comments that can be vulgar. Not everything has to be beautiful or serious. Not everything has to be Da Vinci or Picasso or whatever.

But I'm with the commenters who note that it doesn't feel like Titus is coming from a place of art or even a place of trying to share human frustrations with other people. His stuff feels like an act of aggression. What do you call it when someone chooses the most vulgar, base thing in human life - crapping - and then talks about it over, and over, and over, and over, and over? It's nihilistic. It's ugly.

And the person doing it knows that on some level. And there's still some need to be respected and liked there, so they figure if they do it over and over, with variations in the language used, that it will have to be considered "art" or a "performance" instead of just an ugly desecration of a public space. We see this all the time in the modern art world. People doing very very ugly things and trying not to be called on it by calling that ugliness "art".

And their response if someone objects is "well don't read it if you don't like it."

Would you say that to someone who came into a public space where discussions are going on and pulled down his pants and crapped in front of everyone? Would you accept him saying "well don't watch me crapping if you don't like it?" Is that what our society has come to, that we have to accept people publicly crapping because to do otherwise would be to "judge" or to "be uptight" or whatever terminology the left is using now to ridicule people who want some public standards beyond "thou shalt not make a discriminatory comment"?

Titus is the logical extension, and perhaps endpoint, of the liberal fetish with anti-discrimination. When the highest value becomes "thou shalt not discriminate between things, thou shalt not judge, just don't look if you don't like it" then you get blogger and real-world Tituses who take their anger and bitterness about their differentness and gleefully shove their shit in your face, taunting you the whole while about how you can't do anything about it because that would be "judgmental".

I understand the Tituses. I don't really understand someone thinking it's so funny they're doubled over laughing. He's too aggressive for it to be funny.

Old Math said...

I just realized I am commenting on a blog about comments about blogs. We can do one more level if Ann can writes a blog entry about this comment.

garage mahal said...

I think Titus reading the rants between Palladian and Cedarford would much more entertaining. Palladian telling Cedar he likes sucking black gang-banger cock through the eye holes of his sheet was solid gold. I'd pay to see this play.

Caroline said...

William S. Burrough's was the original scatological queer (in my limited frame of reference, that is):

From "Naked Lunch":

"In Timbuktu I once saw an Arab boy who could play a flute with his ass, and the fairies told me he was really an individual in bed."

Another Sample.

tim maguire said...

There's a sublime genius to Titus's posts, but I think a reading would get boring after a few minutes and just might ruin Titus forever.

He is meant to be taken in small doses.

Darcy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ernesto Ariel Suárez said...

People, people, Titus is not Ann. He sells dresses in NYC...

I'm Full of Soup said...

I think Penny might be Titus.

TitusFreezeFrame said...

I don't sell dresses in NYC-that would be Trooper York.

I work in Biotech.

And I am not 60-70 years old lonely shutin. I am 38 and have a fairly active social life. I am alone as I like being alone but I am certainly not lonely.

Palladian and Ann have both seen a picture of myself in my BMW with one of the rare clumbers heads out the window.

All the psychoanalysis is weird. I just want to lighten up things around here-that's all. It's obvious not for everyone.

I have written about many other things then loaves and hogs though. Wisconsin, my family, food, clothes, working out, vacations, politics, work, friends, other commenters love for Althouse, etc.

TitusFreezeFrame said...

And I have never used another name other than Tituswithsomethingattachedtoit.

AllenS said...

Eat loaf.

Is what I just said funny? I just laughed so hard, I almost cried.

Tibore said...

Since I didn't participate last Sunday's thread, I'll do so here: I agree fully with Palladian, Hoosier Daddy, and DBQ. Why celebrate what is in the end trash?

I see that some find value in Titus's posts, but let's be honest: He's talking about shit. You can dress it up, gild it, bring various levels of metahumor into it, but ultimately it all comes back to the fact that he's basing his act on shit. For that reason alone, it's simply not a good schtick. Dressing up scatology does not make it any cleaner or more tolerable; it's still crap in the end, regardless of the number of people who laugh at it.

On top of that, he's functionally performing as a derail. That people must skip by and work to ignore his "contributions" actually emphasizes that; you must work to avoid his stuff. Bad performance art like his isn't considered polite in regular conversation; why is it celebrated here? Because blogs and the internet in general are different? I don't think so. The fact of the matter is, regardless of how funny others find him to be, he tries to drag threads in his own direction. And that's selfish, even ignoring the vulgarity of his posts.

People are defending him by talking about the value of diversity, and I don't deny its importance at all. But unfettered "diversity" ultimately wrecks itself by drowning out the alternate viewpoint in the keening of the most outrageous. Some propriety is necessary in human interaction, and that was a lesson humans learned well before the advent of the printing press, nevermind the internet. Yet, it's embraced here as though all rules of civilized discourse don't apply. Sorry, but that doesn't wash with me. Dressing up "discordance" with the term "diversity" no more makes off-key music sound better than it makes gutteral sewer commentary tolerable. A nice sounding term can't disguise reality.

This is not my blog, so I have no place to say Titus should leave. But let's remember some things:

His posts ultimately do not allow for a range of interactions: You either wallow in the dung, or you laugh at it and move back to the original topic. Either way, what he does isn't conducive to good, flowing discourse.

His posts are repetative: Just how often do we have to hear about pinching loaves? The shock value's well aged already.

His posts obscure all meaning in ugliness: Most people can find a way to highlight things with wit or clever phrasing, thus demonstrating far more creativity and thought, without having to resort to sewage humor. Sir Archy, for example, sometimes had even less of a point to make than Titus does, and he was every bit as one note as well, but can anyone honestly say that Titus is more thoughtful than Sir Archy? Just for the work he put into it, his few contributions are far more valuable than Tituses because he showed some real heart and caring in his compositions. Contrast that to Titus: Anyone can talk about shit.

I'll continue my recent practice of ignoring his stuff. But honestly, Professor, if you're soliciting opinions, here it is: His post do not contribute. They do not even reach the level of being a pale imitation of Andres Serrano. They merely soil.

Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...

Althouse, all this project will do is encourage sockpuppets. I thought the guy was harmless until he started insulting some of the females here. There is a creepy undercurrent to this guy. your focus on his behavior seems like an unjustified reward.

Darcy said...

Thank you, Bushman. And a belated thanks to Palladian, too.

Hazy Dave said...

When or if the project becomes reality, Professor, be sure to involve someone in cleaning up and optimizing the audio experience. Palladian is the obvious choice, but there's an army of us with the digital post-processing tools at our fingertips to edit, clean, enlouden, tweeze, adorn, and enhance the listening experience, something the old podcast could have used, in my estimation.

I'll leave it to your own business sense to decide whether to produce and sell CD's or CD-R's or find a means to sell mp3 downloads...

Chip Ahoy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chip Ahoy said...

I became friends with a woman, Carol, who was very intellectual, talented (piano), bookish, eccentric to an extreme, and was broadly hated. She described to me a Fellini film wherein people are sitting on toilets in a circle, dressed in their finest, and conversing naturally. A little boy says, "Mommy I"m hungry," and the mother goes, "Shhhhh!" Carol grinned. She thought that was brilliant. Reading my disgust, Carol patiently explained, "The point is, Fellini took two natural things, eating and shitting, observed there are all kinds of social rituals and mannered proprieties built up around one while the other is shunned as disgusting, then Fellini reversed them. Brilliant!

Carol's respect for this sort of thing is exactly what alienated her among our peers, but it did make me interested in knowing more about Fellini.

I like to discuss food preparation and make links to my efforts with photographs. I think of Titus' posts as Fellini posts and I'm grateful he doesn't post links with photographs of his efforts. But, because of Carol and because of what little I know about Fellini through her I cannot object to Titus or to your interest in his comments. I admit I skip over most of them. But annoyingly the imprint is still made in the skipping. For instance, I didn't read the post about the sock, I skipped as soon as I saw where it was going, and yet when the post was read back by Palladian, I realize I hadn't missed a single detail, which proves to me it's harder to skip than I thought.

I would not buy the CD, and by listening to Palladian, whose ridicule of Titus is actually much funnier than Titus, sorry Titus, sorry Fellini, sorry Carol, it must now be deleted from iTunes to make it go away.

chickelit said...

The copyright issue is an interesting aside.
Daryl made a useful suggestion in the original post on this theme. I believe that Richard L. Cohen is on record somewhere in his blog stating that comments belong to the commenter exclusively, whereas Zach seems to think that comments on his blog belong to him. Althouse seems to favor the former.
The law distinguishes between inventor and owner of an invention, and I assume between authorship and ownership of written work. What exactly does copyright law say about this?
Anybody?

Smilin' Jack said...

So I said I wanted to record — and sell — a CD of me reading some of my favorite Titus comments.

I think that would be a desecration of Titus's art. His comments should be appreciated in the original written rather than oral form. The numerous errors in spelling and punctuation are essential to the overall effect.

(--eeeewww!!--I just used "Titus and"oral" in the same sentence--pardon me while I wash my keyboard.)

Also I think your laughing at Titus reveals your own homophobia. Titus is trying to provide an honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male, and you're displacing your natural reaction--eeeewww!!--into laughter as a defense mechanism. Palladian's overwrought hostility is obviously an even more pathetic attempt at defense and denial.

Face your fears, people--the truth may hurt, but it can also set you free.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Titus reminds me of that scene in Anny Hall. There's an upper eastside dinner party, and Woody is in the bedroom watching the Knicks when his wife comes in and says...

ROBIN : Here you are. There's people out there

ALVY : Hey, you wouldn't believe this. Two minutes ago, the Knicks are ahead fourteen points, and now ... they're ahead two points

Alvy reaches over, pulls Robin down onto the bed. He kisses her and moves farther up on the bed

ROBIN : Stop acting out

ALVY : No, it'll be great! It'll be great, be-because all those Ph.D.'s are in there, you know, like ... discussing models of alienation and we'll be in here quietly humping

ROBIN : Alvy, don't! You're using sex to express hostility

ALVY : Why-why do you always r-reduce my animal urges to psychoanalytic categories?

ROBIN (Pulling away again)

There are people out there from The New Yorker magazine. My God! What would they think?

Ryan said...

Althouse said: "By the way, Palladian left out the funniest part of the sock story, the part that nearly killed me."

Is that this part? "I just threw the sock away as I would hate to see the rare clumbers chewing on it. That would be gross."

And it might make clumbers even rarer?

I think we should all just donate $10 to Ann, regardless. Don't you think she deserves it? I'm going to do it now.

Ann Althouse said...

The thing I found most funny in the Mauve Café was the comment that ends with the question "How weird?"

traditionalguy said...

Lem... That was a winner of a quote!!A Church Blog would never lower its standards to include the vulgar side of humans, but I enjoy living around the human condition in all of its vulgar glory. Is that "sluming"? Or is that as GBS would say,"Only the lower classes and the Higher classes are free to act their real selves. The middle classes must always strictly avoid being seen around Bad words or Bad conduct which could cause them to lose their status..." That's only my memory of the gist of the GBS worldview (see, My Fair Lady).

Anonymous said...

Because the discourse concerning the textural semiotics of Titus's sexualized offerings is not of a sufficiently academic nature to be the object of attention in an admittedly sui generis blog having its origins within an academic context, it it appropriate to say a few more words concerning the deconstructive sexualization and postcapitalist transgressive character of Titus's texts.

“Reality is elitist,” says Sartre; however, according to Tilton, it is not so much reality that is elitist, but rather the dialectic, and subsequent economy, of reality. If textual narrative holds, we have to choose between subcapitalist destructuralism and predialectic socialism. Therefore, the primary theme of the comments of Titus is the role of the reader as artist.

In Port of Saints, Burroughs denies the precultural paradigm of discourse; in Queer, however, he reiterates subcapitalist destructuralism. However, Theo Boehm holds that we have to choose between constructive deconstruction and postcultural nihilism.

Palladian promotes the use of the precultural paradigm of discourse to challenge and analyze class. In a sense, if subcapitalist destructuralism holds, the comments of Cedarford are an example of capitalist nationalism.

Subdialectic theory suggests that culture serves to oppress minorities. But a number of discourses concerning 'not narrative' per se, but postnarrative exist.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TMink said...

Titus?

Who is Titus?

Trey

Tibore said...

Jesus, Theo, are you trying to put me to sleep?  :D

Tibore said...

(Just in case it's not obvious, that last comment was Tibore-speak for "Theo, that was brilliant!")

Beth said...

I sympathize with Palladian's reading of Titus as minstrel, but I must be more enamored of deconstruction than I like to admit, because from the beginning of Titus' appearances here, I've enjoyed his counterpoint to some of the more hostile and hysterical homophobes, like Cedarford.

Someone stated: "Titus is trying to provide an honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male" -- no, he isn't. He's having a ball trying to provide a depiction of what some people insist is the life of a "typical gay male." He's playing them like a fiddle.

Well, that's part of his schtick I think he enjoys the grotesque for itself, as well.

traditionalguy said...

Theo Boehm... I understood your post clearly. That is scary. This Blog must be ruining my mind. Maybe Buddhists are right? Think very,very hard. If I think I am not here, then life seems lighter than a feather. But then, who are you?

Ernesto Ariel Suárez said...

TitusFreezeFrame said...
I don't sell dresses in NYC-that would be Trooper York.

I work in Biotech.

[...]

10:15 AM


Research subject?

Chennaul said...

Titus is-the opposite of anal retentive-

he's-anal expulsive-

An anal expulsive personality is broadly defined as exhibiting cruelty, emotional outbursts, disorganization, self-confidence, liberal-mindedness, (sometimes) artistic ability, generosity, rebelliousness and general carelessness.

Now-I actually like Titus particularly when he is describing travel-hell I love Maine-so whatever-

BUT-

He's cruel.

I loathe that.

Now some of your female commenters might want to be liked by the boys too much to complain-but I have noticed the trend.

And what was particularly grade school vicious is what he did to PatHMV.

Did you even see that?

Was that laugh out funny for you Titus Supporters?

Now there were some gals here with the grace and goodness to save that-but be damned if Titus didn't move to another thread and harange him some more.

Based purely on Titus' grade school opinion of his looks.

Now Titus I get that you were probably treated like shit-on school playground-but get over it.

Quit passing the buck.

Beth said...

I have a friend, a hetero female, who is nearly as grotesque as Titus. Almost every conversation with her will involve a bodily function or a play on words: the restaurant down the street is named Reginelli's and she calls it Vaginelli's, for example. We spent a couple of hours on chat recently working our way through a NYT story on obscene names of small English towns.

This friend has been known to call and leave a message consisting of nothing more than a loud belch or yes, a fart.

And I treasure her for this.

Ann Althouse said...

"Vaginelli's"

LOL

MnMark said...

Chip Ahoy: yes, eating and shitting are both natural functions and we build up different social rituals about this. But the Fellini "insight", as expressed by your friend, that they're both "natural functions" is a perfect example of the kind of liberal elimination-of-crucial-distinctions-in-the-name-of-equality that I mentioned above.

Because something is a natural function does not make it as equally beautiful and equally worth sharing with other people as other natural functions.

Our taboos about bathroom functions are not simply pointless exercises in bourgeois hypocrisy. Shitting is not an activity other people want to share with you. There's a whole bunch of human functions that are not beautiful to other people, as necessary as they may be to one's survival as an organic being.

Humans can discern beauty and quality, which are mysterious things and not always agreed upon. But we have to share the same physical space with people who don't have the same sense of beauty, and those different types of beauty are somtimes mutually exclusive. What to do? The liberal solution is to decree that no definition of beauty or quality is more valid than any other. This leads to ridiculous outcomes like people suggesting that shitting in public is no different than eating in public. After all, there might be someone who finds shitting in public beautiful, and who are we to say that they are wrong? Just hold your nose, cover your ears, and look away if you don't like it! The public space is for anyone to do anything they want! Anything goes!

And that opens the door for passive-aggressive people who are angry with the world that they aren't like other people, and use the liberal egalitarian social convention to force their ugliness on us as a punishment, while trying to excuse it with the liberal "everything is equally valid" mantra. Posting "I pinched a loaf today..." in a blog is an example.

We're in the midst of an era where this liberal idea that there are no valid differences in the world is being tried out on all sorts of levels - artistic and political for sure. And it's creating a lot of ugliness and resentment. It doesn't work in the real world. In the real world, shitting is best done privately and eating is best done with others. There are distinctions that matter. Everything is not equal. And having a civil society depends in part on people being willing to stand up and say so, and enforce those social proprieties.

Chennaul said...

Althouse-

Damn it you must have a good imagination because I was really repulsed and then Palladian read it-and I laughed my ass off.

But I do think that Palladian tries to fight that stereo type with all his might.

The Michael "voice" not so good.

Should have been a six year old with his mom in the background telling him it was bath time.

Oh and whille I'm at it I'd love to have Palladian read that French Canadian that comes in here braggin' about is banks...

[But that's probably just me-oooh Titus as a French Canucker...]

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Was that laugh out funny for you Titus Supporters?

I'm an Althouse supporter first... Titus?.. he's got his moments.

Oh.. I'm also a Palin supporter.

Caroline said...

FYI- in my previous comment, the word "queer" is used in reference to one of Burroughs' titles .

I had left out the link. I don't want it construed as being meant as a pejorative. I think Burroughs was a gifted writer, but I can imagine he would not appeal to a broad audience. (I had trouble getting through "Naked Lunch".)

But as Steve Martin said "comedy is not pretty".

Ms. Althouse, IMHO you should go ahead and do the project, if you would enjoy it and it wouldn't break your bank. Or get you sued. (I probably wouldn't buy it, but that's because I'm pretty stingy.)

NotWhoIUsedtoBe said...

Write a book! Blogging makes no money. I'd love to read it. The internet sucks up so much talent into things no one reads or remembers.

Sisyphus said...

Like Prairie Wind, I think the thing that would make me most interested in buying such a CD would be if Titus was merely some part of Professor Althouse's blogger performance art.

That got me thinking - what if all the regular commenters here are in fact Ms. Althouse. I strongly doubt that's true. But it could make for an interesting plot for a book, if the identity of various blog commenters were somehow associated with some non-blogosphere mystery, like a murder (that perhaps turns out to be a suicide).

Could Althouse write a book about her blog that was not about her blog? Through fiction, yes she can!

Smilin' Jack said...

Beth said...
Someone stated: "Titus is trying to provide an honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male" -- no, he isn't. He's having a ball trying to provide a depiction of what some people insist is the life of a "typical gay male." He's playing them like a fiddle.


Too much deconstruction there, Beth. Sometimes the text just means what it says.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Titus played Guy in The Science of Dreams 2006

giving advice to Stéphane (the movie lead) in a ski dream

Serge: Stéphane, talk to her with the heart!

Martine: Yeah, be gentle!

Guy: Fuck her!

Michael Haz said...

......what if all the regular commenters here are in fact Ms. Althouse.

*Lifts shirt in front of mirror*

*Checks closet for presence of red shoes*

*Looks in garage to see if Honda has transformed into an Audi*

*Calls sister, asks if her son is a PGA golfer*

*Attempts to teach a ConLaw class. Removed by security guards*

*Calls JAC and CAC. Both hang up.*

*Calls RLC. Says he's 'busy'*

*Takes out camera, points and clicks. Flash goes off in face.*

*Tries walking to Picnic Point. Ninety miles later, still not there.*

Nope, not me. I yam who I yam.

Kensington said...

No thank you. I wouldn't listen to it if it were free, and I certainly wouldn't pay for it.

Ick.

Darcy said...

madawaskan: That has also been my read. And let me just say that as for myself, I didn't "save" that attack on PatHMV. He really is cute! But I don't think you really meant that...just wanted to clarify.

Chennaul said...

Darcy...

Yikes I started to think in French-and those two posts go to pot...

Yikes! You are right not how I meant "save" at all-I meant the mood of it.

Anonymous said...

FWIW, I can handle one post in any given thread from Titus. But he's a commenting Lays; he can't eat just one. 14+ of the same comments later, it's thread over.

That still puts him ahead of downtownlad or the late, not-at-all lamented LuckyOldSon, who get me out of a thread instantaneously.

Or, most recently, AlphaLiberal's asinine insistence that he knows what various commenters on the chimpanzee cartoon are thinking better than they do.

William said...

This thread seems to have brought out an unusual number of interesting comments. Herewith my submission: My understanding of Freud is limited by my belief that it's largely a crock, so take this with a grain of salt. In my understanding, productive work is linked in the mind with potty training. We labor to produce a result and mommy rewards us with praise. Titus pinches a loaf, and Althouse rewards him with praise. We're not in the field of metaphysics here. Whatever mixture of shame and productivity that causes Titus to offer a running commentary about his loafs is shared by Althouse. By offering a narration of his comments, she is, in effect, offering us a pinched loaf at one remove. Now we're in the field of metaphysis.....I think all of us, including Althouse, have a vague sense of shame about the time spent on the internet. It's simply not a productive use of time. We labor to produce money. If we don't make money, we're wasting time. Shit or get off the pot....By attempting to make money (i.e. produce shit) by narrating about Titus's logs, Althouse is getting back to basics. Two, four, six, eight, we don't want to sublimate....In my opinion, anyone who spends their hard earned money on such a project is just pissing it away.

Darcy said...

No worries, madawaskan! ;-)

Methadras said...

It's bad enough that I have to read and frankly, endure The Titus Show on here, but in my synesthaetic sensory pattern, Titus to me is like a Picasso, a disjointed, malformed conglomeration of cubist nonsense with no attachment to reality akin to something from Bizzaro World except with was slap-dashed together by a monkey that suffers from severe Parkinson's. Titus is the car crash everyone wants to see, but knows deep down inside that they don't want to be a part of. Ever.

Roberto said...

Anybody who thinks the tripe Titus throws out is interesting really needs to get a life.

He sounds like a ten-year old spouting whatever he thinks will elicit attention from his elders.
(My wife read some of his recent blather and asked why Ann allows children into the fray.)

I don't agree with many here (damn near anybody for that matter), but there quite a few who at least have a point of view worth they can present and defend...whether I or others accept it or not.

Titus is immature, his writing is barely literate and he's not interesting in the least.

Why Ann finds this character interesting is rather bizarre.

*Does she know him personally? Is she friends with his mother?

Hoosier Daddy said...

You know, while I still don't want to listen to a dramatic reading of Titus's loaves and hogs, I still prefer his posts to Michaeloldson.

That being said, it's kinda sad when you have to make those kinds of concessions.

Roberto said...

Hoosier - I would expect nothing less from a right wing redneck from Indiana.

Fart and shit comments sound right up you alley.

Christy said...

I skipped the earlier thread because I generally skip Titus. When he is on a roll in comment after comment, I'm done with the thread. Occasionally the accidental read intrigues, but overwhelmingly Titus's shtick repulses, as do all caricatures of gay men.

The good news is that it has driven me off to other blogs more often and thus expanded my sites-which-must-be-checked.

Roberto said...

Christy - "Titus's shtick Titus's shtick repulses, as do all caricatures of gay men."

Really.

I have no idea why so many here think his denigration of gays is so hilarious...especially Ann.

And if he is indeed gay, that makes it even more disgusting and hard to understand.

Ralph L said...

After all this fuss, I wonder if Titus will be too self-conscious to tell us about his loaves and hogs. Perhaps this is Althouse's diabolical plan.

Roberto said...

Ralph - "After all this fuss, I wonder if Titus will be too self-conscious to tell us about his loaves and hogs."

Don't count on it. This is his primary center of attention.

birdie bob said...

Chickenlittle @ 11:14 asks about "ownership" of comments and thinks that Althouse favors the view that the commenter "owns" his remarks. Just to nitpick, I got the opposite impression in the following exchange about 13 months ago.
Who controls commenter input?
I'd suggest going to about the last 4 comments and then backtracking as needed to add context.

chickelit said...

birdie bob: thanks for digging that up. I didn't see that post, otherwise I probably would have remembered it.
I did find the RLC comment I mentioned here.

J. Cricket said...

I'm not self-absorbed

Say it enough times....and it still won't be true.

But it is hilarious!!

TittusLovesU4EverLongTime said...

Can I call a moratorium on Titus as a Topic for a posting?

I am feeling uncomfortable

How would the rest of you feel diced and sliced and judged and despised and a bunch of other stuff?

My only goal was to bring some levity to some of the proceedings. No ulterior motives. And if I was going to be "the typical gay male" I don't think pinching loaves is something that is equated with the typical gay male.


Maybe I will change my name and just add to the postings every once and in awhile and say, "liberals suck"-that should fit well here.

Republican said...

For anyone to appreciate Titusblahblah's spoken word, we would have to appreciate his written word, and believe that it could translate to something entertaining-or-be presented to us by Ann in an entertaining way.

I am not a believer! In fact, Titusblahblah is not a good performance artist, because s/he is playing to the audience with every keystroke.

Yuk.

Anonymous said...

Like the vote for Obama, this idea again demonstrates how overrated intelligence is.

chickelit said...

I don't think pinching loaves is something that is equated with the typical gay male.

Actually Titus, I will forever associate pinching a loaf with Tommy Chong--that's the way it should be.

Republican said...

The issue is not that Titus does a schtick, but that it is a faux-gay-schtick, used to justify nothing more than immature trolling and comment-jacking.

It's extremely contrived, for the sake of being offensive and outrageous.

It's like the epsisode or Project Runway when everybody had to dress a drag queen. All about fakery.

Simon said...

TittusLovesU4EverLongTime said...
"Can I call a moratorium on Titus as a Topic for a posting? I am feeling uncomfortable"

Well, you invest a great deal of time and glee in making other people feel uncomfortable, so I'd say that turnabout is fair play, wouldn't you?

Palladian said...

"Maybe I will change my name and just add to the postings every once and in awhile and say, "liberals suck"-that should fit well here."

You do that, with your unfunny "Good Afternoon, Fellow Republicans and Lovers of the Bush Doctrine" routine. It's an even less effective attempt at humor than the poop and hog jokes.

"Titus is trying to provide an honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male,"

I'm a gay male. I know a lot of gay males. Titus's comments are certainly not an "honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male". Partly because there is no such thing as a typical gay male, no matter what the media and the advertising industry want you to believe.

"...and you're displacing your natural reaction--eeeewww!!--into laughter as a defense mechanism."

My natural reaction to what? Homosexuality? Sorry, honey, but my natural reaction to healthy displays of homosexuality is to get a hard-on not to say "ewwwww"... I'm sure it's great fun hooking up with you...

I will admit that my natural reaction to graphic descriptions of defecation and the qualities of human waste is to say "ewwww". You'll find that a fairly universal reaction among us humans.

"Palladian's overwrought hostility is obviously an even more pathetic attempt at defense and denial."

I love being psychoanalyzed by a douchebag.

Just as you shouldn't take titus's comments at face value, you shouldn't assume that what people write in the comments is necessarily an accurate reflection of the person behind the Blogger alias. I write here as "Palladian", not as Evan. Palladian is, to one degree or other, a persona, a filter through which I react to and riff on the topics that come and go here at Althouse.

Beau said...

William Shatner reading Titus' comments for sale as a CD would be worth listening to,

Interesting choice. Unfortunately, he can't take this on. He wants to be Prime Minister of Canada and he might have to get in a bit of study first.

Althouse: How are are you going to transfer the impact that comes with the visual of multiple posts. In particular, one post following another? I'm sure there's a word for the concept created by doing this. If not, you could give name to it.

Palladian said...

"Well, you invest a great deal of time and glee in making other people feel uncomfortable, so I'd say that turnabout is fair play, wouldn't you?"

It's typical of sociopaths to behave without respect or even acknowledgment of other people's feelings or opinions while expecting other people to behave with absolute respect towards them.

Dylan said...

Isn't one of the HUGE upsides of this potential product that we'll get some incredible Althousean soundbites to take out of context a la "Obama says motherfucker?"

Why the chop and paste possibilities alone could create an internet meme sensation!

Beau said...

Well, you invest a great deal of time and glee in making other people feel uncomfortable, so I'd say that turnabout is fair play, wouldn't you?

Uncomfortable because of subject perhaps, but in general, Titus doesn't make personal attacks against individuals. Not that I've seen anyway. These two threads contain a lot of personal insults towards someone who to me is pretty harmless as commenter.

Republican said...

Even Republicans would not think of phoning people up so they could eavesdrop on our sexcapades.

We believe in keeping sex where it belongs:

(Bathroom stalls and the Internet)

chuck b. said...

Whatever, whatever, whatever.

I just want the CD of Althouse saying things like "My ass is like that of a 13 year old boy-my doctor has told me. Also, I have a perfect prostate" and "I ran out of toilet paper today and I had to wipe my third pinched loaf with the closest available sock."

Is it really so bad to want that?

After I die, I'm going to spend eternity burning in Hell. Please, just let me buy the CD. It's my money, and I earned it. Let me spend my money.

Michael Haz said...

Michael sayeth: Anybody who thinks the tripe Titus throws out is interesting really needs to get a life.

Pot. Kettle. Black.

A side comment to Titus:

Carry on.

KCFleming said...

I have read both threads on the proposal and I remain flummoxed.

But then I never got late-career Andy Kaufman, or entire-career Ben Stiller, discomfort-as-humor.

Perhaps I am also missing something very meta about it.

I find this whole issue inexorably sad, as if Althouse took one of her lovely photos and dipped it in a glass jar of urine, thinking that an improvement.

But since my posts likely elicit more ignores than does Titus, what the fuck do I know?

Michael Haz said...

I'd like to hear Barney Frank read Titus's posts.

Darcy said...

LOL, chuck b.

Titus, I don't despise you, for what it's worth.

Smilin' Jack said...

Palladian said...

I'm a gay male. I know a lot of gay males. Titus's comments are certainly not an "honest and accurate depiction of the life of a typical gay male".


Your word against his!

"...and you're displacing your natural reaction--eeeewww!!--into laughter as a defense mechanism."

My natural reaction to what? Homosexuality? Sorry, honey, but my natural reaction to healthy displays of homosexuality is to get a hard-on not to say "ewwwww"...


The laughter comment was directed to Ann. You have to admit that, while Titus's comments may be mildly amusing at times, laughing "into hysteria" at them, as Ann did, suggests some underlying psychological issues.

I love being psychoanalyzed by a douchebag.

Ah, Palladian, Palladian...denial is not just a river in Egypt.

BJK said...

Personally, I think that having Ann read Titus' comments kills the experience....it accepts the basic premise that the comments are not to be taken literally, without providing the proper context.

The best example I can think of is that it's the auditory equivalent of Ben Stiller imitating Joaquin Phoenix (apparently riffing on Andy Kaufmann).
As another example, it's like the friend of yours whose Presidential impersonation sounds more like an impression of an SNL cast-member's impression of the President.

Even if you can appreciate parts of the execution, the extra layer of abstraction makes the previous level of satire seem less-interesting. The very concept of the CD is an acceptance that everyone in the audience is already in on the joke. It's self-defeating.

Palladian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Palladian said...

"Uncomfortable because of subject perhaps, but in general, Titus doesn't make personal attacks against individuals."

"Palady Wadley uses the term "hate" quite a bit.

I wonder why that is?

Could it have something to with him hating himself?

As a friend who cares I am asking you to put the fork down and move away from the buffet.

You will feel better. Happier even. And filled with less talk of all this hate.

I know a chubby chaser club if you are interested."

...

Let go Let God Palady Wadley.

One day at a time my little Porkette.

I am here for you.

There before the Grace of God go I.

Can you feel the shedding of the pounds? I can.




"Pat, your picture looks like an ad for some hair restoration before picture.

Or an ad for a pest control company..."

Palladian said...

Not that I don't deserve Titus's attacks, seeing how much fun I have attacking him, but I was just using those as an example of the fact that titus does personally attack people. It doesn't bother me, especially fat jokes, but it's certainly indicative of a mean side of him that you seem to think doesn't exist.

Christy said...

I confess I let my security clearance lapse occasionally when the job didn't demand it, and so ended up taking all those psych tests again and again. One question that always puzzled me was "I go to the bathroom more often than others" Yes or No? I never knew how to answer because I didn't have a clue as to how often others went to the bathroom. Turns out, few people do. It is just that people over thinking bowel movements or thinking theirs are "special" (said in Church Lady voice) raise a red flag when organizations are checking for mentally stable employees. Further investigation is required. Just saying.

FWIW, I finally got around to asking my gastroenterologist. Are you ready for this? from once every three days to three times a day is normal.

Smilin' Jack said...

Hey, we're all just dots on a screen here. What's wrong with Pixel A attacking Pixel B, as long as it's done creatively and amusingly, as per Ann's instructions? And I have to say, I think Titus has the edge over Palladian in that regard.

Palladian said...

"And I have to say, I think Titus has the edge over Palladian in that regard."

Well that's because you have all the taste and subtlety of the decorator at a Russian orphanage.

Darcy said...

I second what Palladian just said.

Smilin' Jack said...

Palladian said...
Well that's because you have all the taste and subtlety of the decorator at a Russian orphanage.


Hmmm...well, I appreciate that that took a little more effort than "douchebag," but I still don't think you've quite got the hang of it. Perhaps this will inspire you:

Palladian said...
...my natural reaction to healthy displays of homosexuality is to get a hard-on not to say "ewwwww"...

I will admit that my natural reaction to graphic descriptions of defecation and the qualities of human waste is to say "ewwww". You'll find that a fairly universal reaction among us humans.


Heterosexuality is fairly universal too. How is coprophilia less "natural" than homosexuality?

Sounds like someone is being judgmental....

traditionalguy said...

Phooey! Mother Althouse always loves Titus more than she love me. I think I'll go eat... oh never mind.

Beau said...

It doesn't bother me, especially fat jokes, but it's certainly indicative of a mean side of him that you seem to think doesn't exist.

I guess it's a personal thing. I don't find the examples given particularly mean but rather tongue in cheek. Calling someone a sociopath, not so much.

Anonymous said...

You know, I have no problem with Titus except that I don't want to read the comments.

But (ha ha).

I have a, er, solid reason for that.

I am, as stated in the post above, a pathologist by training. I don't do autopsies, anymore, but I did as a resident. One of the things you do, generally, during an autopsy is 'run-the-bowel'. In other words, in order to examine the bowel wall and lining and look for lesions, you open up the the bowel with bowel scissors (they exist) and let all the feces run out. Sometimes you have to wash it out because it is of a more solid consistency. You do this in a sink in the morgue. It is not pleasant.

Hence, my lack of interest in ANY posts regarding bowel movements. I have quite a mental image of said movements, already.

*I decided to delurk (well, I rarely commented under another name in the distant past) because of a fake Doris Kearns Goodwin (is that right, too tired to check) history that Trooper York wrote that made me laugh out loud. It was about Jimmy Carter and a bunch of turkeys.

**Have a nice evening all, and I have to say, I actually find 'Hello Fellow Republicans' pretty funny.

Unknown said...

Color me confused (would that be purple?) I just don't get it -- though, being an engineer, I've been told so many times that I have no sense of humor that it must be true.

I'll admit there was a time I'd have found this subject amusing, but then something happened and now I don't anymore.

Palladian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mrs whatsit said...

When my kids were pre-schoolers, I heard enough bathroom humor to last me a lifetime. Performance art, it ain't.

Smilin' Jack said...

Palladian said...
I tend to think that sexual relations between same-sex partners is somewhat different and less "natural" than eating shit...


Glad we can end this thread in complete agreement! Now back to the NotSOTU....

RR Ryan said...

For what it's worth, no thanks. I'm with Palladian and Onparkstreet on this one.

Palladian said...

Oops.

Repost with correction:

"Heterosexuality is fairly universal too. How is coprophilia less "natural" than homosexuality?

Sounds like someone is being judgmental...."

Sounds like someone is being a douche-bag again. I tend to think that sexual relations between same-sex partners is somewhat different and more "natural" than eating shit, but of course I'm not a douche-bag so what do I know?

Anyway, the bottom line is: you're a douche-bag, Shit-Eating-GrinJack!

Smilin' Jack said...

Palladian said...
Oops.

Repost with correction:


That's called a Freudian slip, Palladian. In your heart you know you got it right the first time.

And that means there's hope for a cure. For you I would recommend aversion therapy: they wire you up and show you porn, and zap you when you respond to the wrong kind. Supposed to be much more efffective than that fundamentalist "prayed straight" crap.

Boring NotSOTU...nothing worth commenting on over there....

Darcy said...

You're a bastard, Jack. I have no idea why you're smiling.

Anonymous said...

In the Battle of the Althouse Homos I think Palladian beats Titus easily.

I thought Titus was kinda funny as Maxine Weiss when he would pick at Ann over mother/son issues.

But Titus is just too vulgar and pointless and I say this as someone who listened to Howard Stern in NY back in the 80s.

I skip right over anything written by Titus or Michael. Too unpleasant.

One only talks shit and the other is a deeply disturbed homosexual.

And I'm not the only one bored and disgusted by Titus.

Cedarford said...

Palladian is just a salami-smoker that likes smarmy "better than you, I went to Yale" snarks.

Titus is always joyous. He writes of good things in his life from the rare clumbers to his gay coprophilia. Or "topping" fatties like Palladian - after Palladian jealously went after him saying Titus was a disgrace to gays and Titus should respect Palladian in his Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson persona as - not "Head Negro in Charge" but "Head Queer".

Then Titus "disrespected" Palladian's self-puffery even further..

Pity that Palladian hates that Althouse thinks Titus is amusing..

That Palladian drags his wheezing heavy bulk into a catfight..ignoring Titus's advantage...As the Libby quote goes, in a contest of wit, Palladian is unarmed.

Anonymous said...

Ann as Johny Carson with Palladian and Titus as Abbot and Costello. All we need now is to cast the sidekick and a couple of other 'guests' for additional color commentary. This I would pay money for.

gefillmore said...

Ann-

you can read whatever you want to read and I'll buy it as long as I can watch you read it-

Beau said...

I tend to think that sexual relations between same-sex partners is somewhat different and more "natural" than eating shit, but of course I'm not a douche-bag so what do I know?

The difference between coprophilia and coprophagia for starters - both natural. No such thing as 'more natural'. It's either natural or not.

$9,000,000,000 Write Off said...

This post has all the milestones of a jump the shark episode- You're visiting a new place (sound studio/LA), taking on risky venture (publishing a CD/jumping a shark) and all the insiderish crackery (re-running your commentators in the body/ Laverne, Shirley and Scott Baio). The boat is turning and accelerating, the slack line is tightening and you're facing the ramp.

What are you going to do?