January 30, 2009

A paean to the inauguration: "Hallelujah... for being smart again. And sexy again. And optimistic again."

This is one of those Maira Kalman illustrated essays in the NYT. I don't want this much sugar in my morning coffee. So let me just say... "sexy"? Is it the government that is sexy now or the people who are enthusiastic about the government who are sexy? Or are you saying you feel sexually attracted to Barack Obama? Or do you just think all the sexy people are liberals or — no one could possibly be this silly — all the liberals are sexy people?

So those are some questions for you. Now, I will answer one question that you raise:
And a woman named Renata asked: "Why [take the oath] on the Bible? Why not on the Constitution?" And I think that is a Very Good Question.
It's a very easy question. The President must swear to "preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States." There would be no safeguard against lying if you swore on the document you were swearing to uphold. If he doesn't intend to respect the document, he has his hand on a document he doesn't respect.

42 comments:

Henry said...

There would be no safeguard against lying if you swore on the document you were swearing to uphold. If he doesn't intend to respect the document, he has his hand on a document he doesn't respect.

He should have sworn on his autobiography.

Paul said...

Re Maira Kalman comment: I believe she meant she was sexually attracted to Barack Obama. This would certainly jibe with a number of conversations I've had with female friends and family members who voted for him partly for this reason (and also recalls JFK's similar affect on female voters in 1960). This raises a possible topic of conversation: how does the sexual motive in deciding whom to vote for relate to the finding, reported recently in thd New York Times ("What Do Women Want?", Magazine, Jan. 25, 2009), that heterosexual women are not terribly aware of what things cause them to become aroused sexually?

George M. Spencer said...

WOULD YOU JUST PLEASE ENJOY THE NICE ART, LAW LADY?

IT'S HARD TO PAINT NJ TURNPIKE REST ROOM SINKS.

OK?

TAKE A BREAK ALREADY.

BE HAPPY.

OPT FOR NAIVETE, WOULD YA?

Ron said...

If I were spending a trillion dollars...I'd feel damn sexy, myself!

The Dude said...

If by "sexy" she means "leftist totalitarian bankrupt state modeled on Zimbabwe", then yes, it is sexy.

Simon said...

She's saying that the people - represented by the people on the mall - showed themselves to be smart again by electing Barack Obama (as opposed to when they previously showed themselves to be dumb by electing Bush). You know, how all of a sudden, people on the left are proud to be American again since the election came out the right way.

That's how I read it, anyway.

AllenS said...

Maira Kalman is a good example why women shouldn't be paid the same as men.

TitusLetsMeetandHaveABabyNowNow said...

There are some sexy guys in the new admin.

Obama, natch. Geitner, definitely, that tall School Secretary-definitely doable, Holder if he gets confirmed you know he is good in bed. Rahm you know is bossy in bed-I like that, and he's hot. The 27 year old speech writer-hot.

Some of the black chicks are pretty hot too. The social secretary is a major diva. Love her hair.

But there are some unsexy ones too. Napolitano-dog, but shes a dyke and we expect them to be dogs. Larry Summers is hideous looking.

The video that has been running on CNN where Geitner and Obama have their legs spread really wide with their elbows on their knees is hot. I imagine them in a steamroom naked like that having a conversation about getting stimulated by each others packages.

TitusLetsMeetandHaveABabyNowNow said...

I am horny today.

TitusLetsMeetandHaveABabyNowNow said...

The term "stimulus package" gets me kind of horny.

ricpic said...

...I think it [the Constitution] is a document that reflects some deep flaws in the American culture...
--Obama

And we're supposed to believe it when he swears to uphold?

Bissage said...

I kind of liked it.

If you listen real hard you can hear Ms. Kalman laughing like a maniac.

Hallelujah!

Titus'sStimulusPackage said...

In honor of the stimulus package I have changed my identify to Titus's stimulus package. I hope you like it.

Make sure you read the Wisconsin State Journal this Sunday or go on line and read it. You will find my ad for a position I have open in Middleton. You won't find my name but you will see my ad.

I woke up with a raging hardon today. We are going to need to take care of that sometime throughout the day.

Wince said...

There would be no safeguard against lying if you swore on the document you were swearing to uphold. If he doesn't intend to respect the document, he has his hand on a document he doesn't respect.

Not sure the Bible carries as much weight with this crowd. Maybe Rules for Radicals?

Speaking of Bush, and the guard with the "perfect red eyebrows"...

Not sure that's a match.

Simon said...

Ricpic, I really do wish that people - left or right - would drop this disreputable habit of quoting a remark without linking to something showing the context. The context of that remark is easy to find, but when you misrepresent a quote, and you don't provide a link, you make it look like you either haven't seen the original or you hope no one else will and will just respond to the quote in vacuo. That has been one of the most tooth-grindingly dishonest, disreputable, and frustrating thing about left-leaning blogs and commenters over the last eight years, and for God's sake, could sensible people not emulate it simply because the boot is on the other foot.

Anonymous said...

This raises a possible topic of conversation: how does the sexual motive in deciding whom to vote for relate to the finding, reported recently in thd New York Times ("What Do Women Want?", Magazine, Jan. 25, 2009), that heterosexual women are not terribly aware of what things cause them to become aroused sexually?

In that article one author claimed that a female fantasy was to be raped by Denzel Washington up against a wall in an alley.

I don't want to know what Maira Kalman wants.

But I thought it was pretty obvious which candidate single women were going to vote for between McCain and Obama.

Sexual interest must have been involved in the decision to some degree.

The Dude said...

Guy stopped by yesterday, said there were 2 million people at the inauguration - said 12 of them missed work that day.

MadisonMan said...

for being smart again. And sexy again.

And doggone it, People like me!

bearbee said...

Have you noticed the change?

Since his inauguration I notice daylight is lasting longer.

A coincident?

I think not.

Hallelujah!

Franco said...

These people are all about being cool and hip, which is really about feeling superior in some way.

Sex is cool so "sexy" is an adjective for cool. (cool-y or cool-ish doesn't work; hip-py or hip-ish doesn't work either)

I doubt this woman actually feels much in the way of real sexuality and when she does she doesn't write about it.

Right on about the Constitution. Besides, we uphold the Constitution, we don't worship it.

Titus'sStimulusPackage said...

I think my hog grew an inch since the election.

TosaGuy said...

Obama chicks are easy

Duncan said...

Ah, the mentally challenged who don't happen to know that an oath is a promise made to (and guaranteed by) God...

"For you, Baldric, the Enlightenment is just something that happened to other people."

Of course, the concept of an oath predates the enlightenment by millennia.

Christy said...

I'm with Franco on sexy meaning cool and hip. Back in the early 90s I remember people using "sexy" in business for projects we anticipated to be popular and fresh. Forward looking business was "sexy." Killer apps were "sexy." Thought that use was now dated. Guess not at the NYT.

Anonymous said...

Titus - as the ads all say, you should go see a doctor if your erection lasts more than 4 hours.

And I don't think it is a coincidence that if you say "election" like The Claw from Get Smart, it sounds exactly like "erection."

Hoosier Daddy said...

as the ads all say, you should go see a doctor if your erection lasts more than 4 hours.

But first you call all your friends to brag.

Titus'sStimulusPackage said...

My friends have all seen it.

I take pictures of it and send it to them.

I am not modest.

KCFleming said...

From the upcoming romance novel:
The American Shah's Insatiable Virgin
Maira Kalman needed a cigarette after writing her love note to Barry, but since the smart-sexy-optimistic-again authoritarians now forbid smoking, she simply gazed out the window of her office at the NYTimes and longed to be held in Barack's loving arms.

She nursed a post-orgasmic quiver, sipped on her Diet Coke, and let out an audible sigh, a small but satisfied smile still on her lips. She dreamed they'd finally meet under the Japanese pagoda tree, which flowers profusely in late summer, embracing in its fragrant dappled refuge.

"Tomorrow," she thought, "maybe tomorrow."

Richard Dolan said...

All that sugar in the morning coffee isn't a good thing. These folks are heading for a big fall. Self congratulatory, over-the-top hype has a way of coming back at you when the results don't support it. In the long run (often in the short run too), they never do.

Here's an example that the Kalmans of this world might understand: Bush in his flight suit, standing on the carrier deck under the "Mission Accomplished" banner. As it happens, of course, that mission ultimately was accomplished. But Bush tagged himself with the same self congratulatory strutting as the Obamian cheerleaders are now repeating. That episode tarred Bush, just as the current messianic version will ultimately backfire on The One.

Tibore said...

"Is it the government that is sexy now or the people who are enthusiastic about the government who are sexy?"

Neither. It's infatuation-induced projection, completely due to the image as constructed by Kalman and not actually warranted by the inherent qualities of her objects of desire i.e. the newly elected government.

When a loser goes to a strip club and falls for a stripper, he's almost certainly projecting all sorts of characterizations onto his object of desire that stem from his own pre- and misconceptions, not from anything the "exotic dancer" is or has done. That's exactly what's happening here.

John Burgess said...

Just a few pictures into the photo essay and I decided it was fatuous.

It doesn't take an inauguration to find Black women wearing wonderful hats in Washington, DC. All it takes is a Sunday and a walk by any church.

Perhaps it's not listed among the touristic sights of the city, but it's a feature, as constant as the day abiding.

One who purports to express truth through art, yet is not aware of this basic fact is not to be taken seriously.

traditionalguy said...

Hallelujah is of course a worship word. The common culture is by definition what is worshiped in common. So this lady likes the new culture of Obama Worship. Free sex, free money, freedom from hard work. freedom from guilt about being protected by WASP Leaders and the American military. It's one package deal. It's Messiah Time.

Chip Ahoy said...

Hallelujah for script that schizophrenically mixes upper and lower case, and for the two dot umlaut-like trema over the i, and the acute accent mark over the final e in the word naïveté, and for the proper use of the word capitol, which has but a single proper use. And Hallelujah for the anthropomorphism of plants that remember nothing at all, and for the gratuitous pedantry of historic common names for trees. Hallelujah for the combination of child-like perceptions and primitive illustrations with adult vocabulary and exquisite spelling.

Hallelujah for the up side to modern myth construction.

So much better behaving like silly little shits projecting their asses off, than acting like spoiled little brats who take up their toys and go stomping off and wailing as banshees heralding death. Charm'n in'nit?

Hallelujah for greeting cards.

Chennaul said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
paul a'barge said...

Why are all the people in those pictures black?

Wasn't Barak Obama inaugurated as the American president? Or just the black president.

Rose said...

Simon says You know, how all of a sudden, people on the left are proud to be American again since the election came out the right way.

I think it is more since the election turned out THEIR way.

For some reason, their sense of empowerment is/has been wrapped up in losing Al Gore's challenges, and now they think they've been made whole, and they're ready to fuck everything in sight - thus the "Stimulus" Bill..

Chennaul said...

Speaking of something-

Dee Dee Meyers in Vanity Fair.

This is the beginning and end of that "essay"-


Barack Obama is the most famous living person in the history of the world.
I’m not trying to induce an acid flashback to John Lennon’s infamous 1966 comment, “The Beatles are more popular than Jesus.” But whether you measure fame in terms of saturation or sheer numbers, it seems indisputable to me that more people know at least something about the new American president than anyone alive, at this point—or any—in the planet’s existence.
Who else could it be? One friend suggest Muhammad Ali, another Princess Diana, and a third said Bill Clinton. Surely all are global brands with enormous reach and broad appeal. But all fall short of the man-meets-the-moment frenzy unleashed by Obama.

To be sure, [...]

But at least for the moment, Obama has made America cool again—and more than that, he’s made his own brand arguably the most powerful the world has ever known.


If I added some youthful punctuation in there Dee Dee Myers would read like-a writer for Teen Beat.

[One helpful skimming and/or editing technique-whenever a liberl starts of with "to be sure" most often you can skip the next two paragraphs.]

Palladian said...

"I think my hog grew an inch since the election."

Wow! If that growth rate keeps up you'll actually be able to grab a hold of it in a couple of years!

Titus'sStimulusPackage said...

Palladian I will have you know I have a nice size hog.

I am actually heading over to your place right now.

Assume the missionary position.

Palladian said...

"Wasn't Barak Obama inaugurated as the American president? Or just the black president."

White liberals have this paternalistic condescension thing towards black Americans. So much of the coverage of the election of Barack Obama has reflected this subconscious infantilization of black people. Black Americans are assumed by these sorts of people to have no greater loyalty or source of unity than race.

Looking at how the media has portrayed black American's reaction to the election makes me think of parents photographing their kids on Christmas morning as they open their presents. Look at how happy they are! Look at how happy we've made them!

Palladian said...

"Palladian I will have you know I have a nice size hog."

Pic? I thought you weren't modest.

Patm said...

I LOVE the artwork.

I HATE the essay.