"... like he’s being a cute little boy... It’s pretty strange. But, it works. Nothing else was ever over the top, but that’s what was so sneaky. All of a sudden he was at my house every night, and I didn’t even remember how he got there..... He’s not a bad dude, but he just doesn’t know how not to have this over-the-top magical romance which eventually leaves girls completely broken. He’s like a love monster. I think this type of guy is more dangerous than the typical one-night-stander because there is so much more emotion and attachment involved that is ultimately more destructive."
A possibly ridiculous essay about "l'Homme Fatale," which is getting some attention.
December 23, 2008
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18 comments:
Ah, men:bad. In shorts. Not in shorts. Without shirts, with boobs, breasts or pecs. How dare they?
It doesn’t take 10,000 hours to learn how to let a silly 30 year-old who sits in corners smoking and drinking whisky create a fantasy around you. Oh. He broke her heart—which is exactly the narrative she was writing at the outset.
This is really silly and really pathetic. Is it the future?
"I am not an insecure person and I was terribly insecure"
You probably shouldn't try to self assess that sort of thing.
While I know they exist, I have never met anyone in my life who made their living as an actor or writer, and suspect the quantity of people who actually do is considerably smaller than their presence in articles like this would suggest. Also, I have no idea what an "ironic dance party" is.
L'homme fatale, c'est moi, ma ex-chere.
If you were to study the behavior of hundreds of thousands of available straight men NYC you are bound to discover patterns.
When we observe the same albeit less complicated Animal kingdom, we dont call it a condition, we call it survival.
Frankly, the possibilities could not be more limited.
A straight man in NY theater? This must be a hoax.
Wow, since when did emo boys count as authentic?
(We pause here to note that the Homme Fatale, while related, is not the same as the oft-bemoaned indie rock or emo boy. While he may exhibit similarly sensitive qualities, an Homme’s emotional side is a learned part of his manipulation, not an authentic sentimentality.)
re: Joe
Said "straight" man (who's involved in theater in NY) has intimate late night conversations with the girl, never makes physical advances, and is surrounded by beautiful women. I don't think "hoax" is the only possible explanation...
Ironic dance parties are parties that young white people go to which allows them to dance poorly to old pop music they pretend not to like. The whole thing is slathered in irony so that they can still remain "cool" to one another while looking like and dancing like their parents.
I found the use of the term "emotionally evolved" (or variants thereof) several times in the article intriguing. When did an effeminant lack of a personality become the next step in evolution? I find it hard to believe that these fellows and the women that they bed are doing much to propagate the species.
"The whole thing is slathered in irony so that they can still remain "cool" to one another while looking like and dancing like their parents"
You know you're getting old when you see a passage like this and think it's simultaneously funny, true and .... sad. Poor babies, so afraid of their emotions.
Not to carry the animal thing too far, but it would seem much like women are attracted to particular sorts of plumage and some men are very good displaying that plumage.
More impressive would be the man who can change that plumage. Jock one day, emo-guy the next.
It's always the same bird underneath, though, isn't it?
"parties that young white people go to which allows them to dance poorly to old pop music they pretend not to like"
Thanks. I checked Stuff White People Like, but couldn't find a specific explanation.
The key word in that article is confidence. Any man who has a sufficient amount of confidence will be sucessful with women.
What makes the article signficant is that we don't typically associate confidence with the mild, artistic, emo-type of man.
But the confident emo guy will find success, as will the confident jock, the confident fat man, the confident laborer, or the confident rich guy. They might be successful with different types of women, but none will lack dates if they want them.
re: confidence as pick up technique
Most women don't want to admit that it's that easy to push their emotional buttons. Therefore the need to create emotional monsters of various stripes.
The mirror image of course is made up of men whose terror of their own emotional needs turns women into madonnas or whores (in their minds).
Some women can just be lured into the charisma of a man because they want to be. L'homme fatale isn't a bad thing to be at all if for nothing else that you are cultivating a cadre of women that swoon over you because you poke into their emotional holes.
Melissa said...
I found the use of the term "emotionally evolved" (or variants thereof) several times in the article intriguing. When did an effeminant lack of a personality become the next step in evolution? I find it hard to believe that these fellows and the women that they bed are doing much to propagate the species.
Sperm + Ovum don't really care about the higher level functions of what it takes to propagate. As long as they are withing striking distance of each other, that's all they care about. What happens after doesn't matter.
"...I really thought he was too evolved and sensitive to hurt me the way he did."
Heh.
I'm reminded of the old saying, that you can't cheat an honest man (or woman.)
When you want someone who isn't real, you get someone who isn't real.
(Of course, an honest man or woman can be cheated! But certain sorts of cons depend on the dishonesty of the party that gets taken for a ride.)
pretty girls find it fascinating to be treated as though they’re not pretty
They do? A certain sort of pretty girl perhaps.
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