March 11, 2008

The Spitzer jokes.

Letterman monologue.

Letterman's "Top 10 Spitzer Excuses."

"The Daily Show."

"The Colbert Report."

All links video. Enjoy Eliot's pain.

22 comments:

MadisonMan said...

Enjoy Elliot's pain.

Every (comedian) loves a hypocrite.

DaveG said...

I can't watch the videos at my current location, but I wonder if any of them pointed out that Spitzer would make a perfect VP candidate for Hillary; after all, that particular "your husband has been caught in an uncomfortable extra-marital situation" 3 AM phone call is one that she is most assuredly the most experienced at receiving.

Considering the success that the wives of former governors who have cheated on them have had in running for New York senate seats, Hillary's replacement in the senate should she win the presidency is also pretty obvious.

George M. Spencer said...

In the car repair place....

Today's CBS Morning Show...host Harry Milquetoast....clips of those 3 comics...a country/rock music video montage of various philandering politicians ('Yore Cheatin' Heart....')...the show's hostess in a low-cut blouse leads a clenched-jawed seething discussion featuring the blonde 'n' Botoxed Sally Quinn, 68 ("Why do men do this?...They want to get caught!...His wife might as well have been wearing a burka!)...a report on the Rock Hall of Fame, including garter-belt shots of a writhing Madonna and saggy-teated Metamucil spokesman Iggy Pop...a brief weather update by a non-threatening African-American man...and a story on pets.

George M. Spencer said...

In the car repair place....

Today's CBS Morning Show...host Harry Milquetoast....clips of those 3 comics...a country/rock music video montage of various philandering politicians ('Yore Cheatin' Heart....')...the show's hostess in a low-cut blouse leads a clenched-jawed seething discussion featuring the blonde 'n' Botoxed Sally Quinn, 68 ("Why do men do this?...They want to get caught!...His wife might as well have been wearing a burka!)...a report on the Rock Hall of Fame, including garter-belt shots of a writhing Madonna and saggy-teated Metamucil spokesman Iggy Pop...a brief weather update by a non-threatening African-American man...and a story on pets.

Tim said...

Senator Chuck Schumer should be very nervous - Silda Spitzer is now, quite obviously, the most qualified person for the U.S. Senate from the Empire State since Hillary! ran in 2000...

Anonymous said...

Hypocrisy is a wonderful comedic target--and who more hypocritical than Mr. Clean himself?

He should go to prison for what he did to his family, though. It's not like he fell prey to temptation, he had an elaborately planned other life. What an arrogant jerk.

Peter V. Bella said...

Priceless:
"We can’t get Bin Ladin but we got Spitzer!"

I feel his pain. I laughed so hard it hurt. I wonder if Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson will stop by and councel and comfort him. You know, kick back and tell each other war, I mean, whore stories.

What is really hilarious is he is supposed to be such a smart guy. Like he thought the banks would not report his financial shenanigans? He outsmarted himself.

He should change his name to Idiot Putz.

El Presidente said...

In the Socialist Paradise such services are provided free of charge to party aparatchniks.

And let me tell you it is better than the free healthcare.

paul a'barge said...

Here is the Letterman Top 10 Spitzer list

rhhardin said...

Rush : superdelegate number nine.

Trooper York said...

I took my troubles down to Madame Ruth
You know that pimp with the gold-capped tooth
She's got a pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
She named me Love Client Number Nine

I told her that I was a flop with chics
I've been this way cause I got a tiny dick
She looked at my worm and she did a little squirm
She said, don’t worry you is Love Client Number Nine

She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink
She said, I'm gonna take it up right here over the sink
It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink
I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took out my dink

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started stickin' everything in sight
But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
He arrested Love Client Number Nine

I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took out my dink

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started stickin' everything in sight
But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
He arrested Love Client Number Nine

Love Client Number Nine
Love Client Number Nine
Love Client Number Nine

(Sorry for the duplicate post, I didn't know there was an offical joke thread)

The Hairy Beast said...

The best line came from the Daily Show:

"Spitzer Swallows!"

Val McMurdie said...

Spitzer is a past editor of the Harvard Law Review, but he didn't support his fellow past editor Obama, instead endorsing the Yale Law team.

For a list of past editors of the HLR search Wikipedia's Harvard Law Review article.

Peter V. Bella said...

Val said...
Spitzer is a past editor of the Harvard Law Review, but he didn't support his fellow past editor Obama, instead endorsing the Yale Law team.



Will Harvard go after him for being a traitor? Will they strip him of all past titles and degrees? Will he be further humiliated? Oh, the same. The real facts come out. Hey, are the US prosecutors Harvard grads?

Unknown said...

Now that the going rate for high-priced whores is $1,200 an hour, Skadden Arps is raising its rates.

Methadras said...

Come on. The Spitzer jokes are practically writing themselves.

Methadras said...

Here is one:

Spitzer, at least we know he's not gay.

Anonymous said...

Eliot Spitzer offered me $500 for a blowjob in a Bronx porta potty. I accepted.

Mitch Haase

blake said...

Not bad, York!

Trooper York said...

The best part about this is you can recyle Clinton jokes.

What's the differance between Elliott Spitzer and the Titanic?

Only 1500 people went down on the Titanic.

Unknown said...

Eliot Shvitzer could have been America's first Jewish President.
The first Jewish President, of course, was Abraham Lincoln.

Few people know that Lincoln was President, but he was shot in the Temple.

Clarissa said...

Speaking as a former professional, I can't help feeling Spitzer did what many married men would do if they had the money and thought they could get away with it--i.e. have a parallel second marriage, pricier but less fraught than the first.