Beyond the word itself, cultivating an exhibitionistic, slutty appearance — donning the trappings of promiscuity as opposed to actually being promiscuous — has been a growing influence on fashion and popular culture for a decade.Biggest cultural development: This long fashion/culture piece contains no reference to Madonna. Am I telling you to go read this whole NYT article? It's a rambling grab bag of observations about young women and sluttery. And I don't mean that as a compliment.
IN THE COMMENTS: Thecla Mauro writes:
While shopping for my ten year old neice one day I overheard one mother say to another, of her eight year old daughter (standing right beside her) "she has a sexy little body, why shouldn't she show it off?"For more Mauro, read her blog. For more talk about this subject, read the comments.
The mother was busily looking through racks of 'ho clothes for her child. Blew my mind.
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15 comments:
Atoosa, you ignorant slut!
"...cultivating an exhibitionistic, slutty appearance — donning the trappings of promiscuity as opposed to actually being promiscuous — has been a growing influence on fashion and popular culture for a decade."
As have the complete abandonment of beauty, self-respect, creativity, imagination, and any depth beyond the few inches required for copulation.
"Popular culture" needs to stop dry humping our leg.
Fantastic. Public education seeks to beat my son into feminine submission and I have the voluntary prostituteration of my daughter to look forward to.
Maybe I'll start a commune.
I think that the posters above have a lot of good points. The problem is that this slutty dress says exactly that to the boys, that the girls want to have sex. Often, they don't, but that is the message received subconsciously by the hormone crazed boys. So, the proposed solution is that the boys just show self-control.
But is that really the right solution? To flaunt what the boys want most out of life at that age in front of them on a routine basis, and then deny tnem it, on the basis of building self-control?
In response to HaloJonesFan's point, yes, this might be considered a natural and healthy expression of human sexuality, except that we don't want the kids to go through with it. As a species, we are wired and juiced (i.e. with hormones) to start mating and having families at this age. That works fine in a society where we are mostly dead by 40, but not so well in a society where you most often don't get out of graduate school until 25 or so. Do we want our 15 year olds mating and raising kids, or getting ready for college?
I always do wonder about the parents who go along with this. Some even push this behavior, though, hopefully, mostly it is giving in to the girls. But why would a parent consciously decide that it is ok for their 15 year old daughter to act like she wanted sex, right then and there, on a pretty indiscriminate basis? Obviously, of course, for most, it isn't conscious, and, IMHO, they really don't understand the messages that their daughters are sending out by engaging in this behavior and dressing this way, or when they do, they can't ocntrol it (but then, who is paying for those clothes in the first place).
Let me add that there is a lot of pressure on the girls to conform to this. First, the boys like it. They prefer girls who look like they are likely to put out. Only natural given that their second brain is in control at this age. But also, a lot of the "role models" dress this way too - esp. in pop culture.
If it walks like a slut and quacks like a slut....
While shopping for my ten year old neice one day I overheard one mother say to another, of her eight year old daughter (standing right beside her) "she has a sexy little body, why shouldn't she show it off?"
The mother was busily looking through racks of 'ho clothes for her child. Blew my mind.
Ruth Anne
Obviously, some of the girls who dress that provocatively are really sluts. but it is hard to believe that those MS girls are - yet.
Bruce Hayden: That's true. Middle school girls who dress sluttily are not all sluts. Yet. I believe the virtue of modesty is in decline and rather than give over to it, parents need to draw a line in the sand and say 'no more!' If a middle school girl is allowed to dress like a slut, it's really only a matter of time before the text catches up to the book cover.
Bunker - when my oldest sister was doing her OB residency 25 years ago in Chicago she delivered a fair number of kids to 12 and 13 year olds. The youngest she ever mentioned was 11.
Personally any friend of my daughter that uses slut or ho to describe her will no longer be welcome in our house and I'll explain to her parents why. Any boy who refers to her that way better run real fast...
"Just because I dress this way, does NOT make me a 'ho!"
"That's fine. But you are wearing a 'ho's uniform."
I think I saw it on Dave Chappelle or some similar comet.
Rap (and other popular music) largely created the modern usage of words like "ho" (along with bitch).
People like to create some sort of intellectual or feminist spin, linking it to Madonna's long ago relevance and ability to play with the ideas, supposedly, of power and sexuality. Reality proves otherwise.
No matter how women might try to make the usage of those words "fun" and "positive", the words are still funneled into society from the thoughts of men, and men tend to know what they mean by them, no matter what women try to imagine men mean.
Young women today have a total disconnect between message and intent, and assume that men can parse the mixed signal in a way that is satifying (to the woman). But young men are usually stupid or selfish, with all roads, messages, and signs leading to their loins.
It's good that you've taught your daughters to look down on other children.
Oh please -- teach your children not to spit in public because it's disgusting and you're teaching "your daughters to look down on other children." Well yes. Because it is disgusting. And so is dressing like a slattern when you're 8 years old.
Woah wait a go on stereotypes, this is why teenagers actually give up on talking to adults I agree to a certain extent that fashion takes its prey too early but i think the general attack on certain styles
"Public education seeks to beat my son into feminine submission and I have the voluntary prostituteration of my daughter to look forward to."
and such like is a little over kill, plus the some of the comments actually move onto teenagers themselves...which is kinda my expertise since i am one i guess i felt parents needed to hear it from us, ignore this comment if u want.
Fashion is obviously a form of expression, and i guess that's why it becomes so important if you look like something it is easier to become something and i guess it depends on someones personal perceptions tht "something" as whether its desirable or not. So on a teenage "journey of self-discovery" (how cliche) its a vital tool along with music etc. but i guess with parents they dress their kids wen their lil as wat the other kids at school dress as and they feel pressured to do so becos they dont want their kid to be the odd one out. That's not bad parenting that's just pride. God bless you parents you don't half try, quite often fail but you realli do try, i just dont think your being fair on other parents realli i mean no ones perfect. You must no tht yourself. Sorry if this is patronising it wasnt meant to be.
ooh after reading a few more comments (there are a lot erm has everyone forgot that teenagers do like have brains or the majority of them anyway...
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