"Swept Away" was one of the worst-reviewed movies of the last decade. Ten years ago, "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" got fine reviews, and what has he done since then? Madonna drained the man of all his great promise. Did you watch that clip up there? Did you see what she did to him? Gruesome.
Payback!
IN THE COMMENTS: Crimso said:
To Hell with Ritchie. I'm shifting into full Age of Obama mode. I want to know how much of Madonna's money I'm going to get. Need to spread that wealth around.Chip Ahoy said:
I'm with crimso. That's a great idea. I want to know how much Madonna's money I'm getting. She's a big Obama supporter and its important for us to know exactly what an Obama administration means by spreading around other people's wealth. I can only benefit from a full-on class war. And I want to know how much Obama's money I'm getting too. He's got a lot. And especially how much Pelosi money I'm getting. She's loaded. Kennedy's money too. And Reid, I really want his money. He owes me. I want some of that. Obama keeps saying "It's fair. It's fair. It's fair. It's fair. It's fair." JUST GIVE IT TO ME! I earned it by listening to this bullshit for over a full year. Yay! Obama! Gimme sum a dat.Glenn Kenny said:
I'm quite delighted this morning. Been reading about cameras and all the amazing things they do. Read about my own camera and learned a whole bunch of stuff. Boy, those manuals sure have a lot of information in 'em. Oh bloody wow, I'll be able to upgrade with somebody else's money !!!!!!
* dances *
and not pay any taxes!
* glees *
Being a socialist is going to be great! And to think how wrong I've been all along. Oh joy, my medical insurance premiums will go down. I'll owe all my new good fortune to my friends who wouldn't listen to me.
Oh Man, my head is spinning. I can't wait to get my grubby mitts on all those celebrities' cash.
Ritchie will be fine. He's got money of his own (family-derived)—not Madonna-type money, but a good chunk. And his next movie's a big deal, a Sherlock Holmes adaptation with Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law. Of course, the un-intertwining of the assets is going to be an unholy mess...Imagine Ms. Ciccone when she saw his shcok. And stop telling me to imagine your shcok or I will want compensation.
I had breakfast with Ritchie at Sundance when "Lock, Stock..." was there, and he struck me as an eminently reasonable fellow. Imagine my shcok when he married Ms. Ciccone....
Posts
72 comments:
"Madonna drained the man of all his great promise."
Sucked him dry.
"Snatch" was great too. But "Revolver"? Awful. Madonna must pay.
I argue the other way around: Ritchie never had more than one good movie in him (all his subsequent movies have only confirmed this suspicion); Madonna was the *best* possible thing that could have happened to his career--kept him in the public arena long after he would have faded away without her.
By the way, if you like movies like the ones Guy Ritchie used to make, I highly recommend "The Bank Job". Jason Statham's great in it.
Give him $150 million or he'll write a tell all book.
To Hell with Ritchie. I'm shifting into full Age of Obama mode. I want to know how much of Madonna's money I'm going to get. Need to spread that wealth around.
I guess it depends on what you would give a woman in a similar situation. Since I don't approve of alimony, I would say he's not entitled to any more than 1 half of the resources acquired during their marriage.
The real problem is that he became enamored of that Kabbalah horeshit that Madonna's into.
What does Camille think?
"Yes, Guy's a guy and maybe it seems wrong for the guy to take the lady's money..."
Yes, in a pre-feminist world, that would have seemed wrong.
But now we're all equal. 1/2 to the government, 1/2 to the lawyers, and the rest they split in half. It's the law!
If Sarah's not careful, she'll be shacking up with Todd soon.
Joe the Plumber, too.
That seems like a movie premise. But it's probably been done.
Why should the gender of the breadwinner enter into the discussion? Maybe Guy should next marry Heather Mills.
Isn't being free of her enough?
Yes, Guy's a guy and maybe it seems wrong for the guy to take the lady's money,
As opposed to a lady taking a guy's money? Joanna Carson? Heather Mills?
Or is that different?
Cannot we be divorced of her as well?
This is a bad day to ask me, but here goes:
All of it.
I'm with crimso. That's a great idea. I want to know how much Madonna's money I'm getting. She's a big Obama supporter and its important for us to know exactly what an Obama administration means by spreading around other people's wealth. I can only benefit from a full-on class war. And I want to know how much Obama's money I'm getting too. He's got a lot. And especially how much Pelosi money I'm getting. She's loaded. Kennedy's money too. And Reid, I really want his money. He owes me. I want some of that. Obama keeps saying "It's fair. It's fair. It's fair. It's fair. It's fair." JUST GIVE IT TO ME! I earned it by listening to this bullshit for over a full year. Yay! Obama! Gimme sum a dat.
I'm quite delighted this morning. Been reading about cameras and all the amazing things they do. Read about my own camera and learned a whole bunch of stuff. Boy, those manuals sure have a lot of information in 'em. Oh bloody wow, I'll be able to upgrade with somebody else's money !!!!!!
* dances *
and not pay any taxes!
* glees *
Being a socialist is going to be great! And to think how wrong I've been all along. Oh joy, my medical insurance premiums will go down. I'll owe all my new good fortune to my friends who wouldn't listen to me.
Oh Man, my head is spinning. I can't wait to get my grubby mitts on all those celebrities' cash.
Ritchie will be fine. He's got money of his own (family-derived)—not Madonna-type money, but a good chunk. And his next movie's a big deal, a Sherlock Holmes adaptation with Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law. Of course, the un-intertwining of the assets is going to be an unholy mess...
I had breakfast with Ritchie at Sundance when "Lock, Stock..." was there, and he struck me as an eminently reasonable fellow. Imagine my shcok when he married Ms. Ciccone....
LOL, Chip. How much sourdough could you make with all of that??
But don't overdo it. Making a lot of money is very evil and should be punished.
The professor is being naughty, to say the least. Guy directed the fucking thing, it was his job to make sure he had a good script and to direct his actors. Most of his other films suck major ass as well!
Guy should not get anything, nor should he emasculate himself by even asking. Be a man Mr. Ritchie, and go continue drinking yourself into oblivion.
Madonna was the top dog and Guy couldn't take it.
I would have divorced him the first time his parents spoke to the media, which they did with surprising frequency.
I think Guy is emotionally retarded, as his soon to be ex-wife alluded to in her Boston show last night.
Good riddance to bad rubbish. No money for the washed up drunk.
I just hope she marries A-Rod and gets him to quit baseball or insist on a trade to the west coast. Maybe we can trade A-Rod to the Padres for Peavy and sign Manny and a Sabitihia and we will be set.
mjsharon said...
The real problem is that he became enamored of that Kabbalah horeshit that Madonna's into.
Isn't that one of those "my girlfriend is a vegetarian, which pretty much makes me a vegetarian too" situations?
He deserves nothing.
His movies sucked-with or without Madonna.
Hasn't she been through enough?
I love Madonna.
A Rod is hot too.
Why not the same percentage as McCartney's second wife?
That's legal.
In real life, he should man up and not ask for a cent.
Ann Althouse said:
Imagine Ms. Ciccone when she saw his shcok. And stop telling me to imagine your shcok or I will want compensation.
The professor is in rare form this morning, that is too funny.
From the things I've heard, Madonna only stayed married to him because of his shcok.
Obama will make Trooper marry ARod in the interests of fairness. If this blog ever folds, or franchises itself, every commenter gets compensation equal to the number of comments written.
There is a fulcrum point between annoying and attractive. Some celebrities like Paris Hilton ride those two poles like a seesaw. I think the real reason behind the mysterious appeal of Paris is that one wonders how someone that annoying can still retain her sex appeal. Madonna has so overweighted the annoying scales that there is no way she can recover. Fake accent, aggressive to the point of hostile sexuality, and compulsively, narcisstically toned body--it would take quite lot to counter balance that load. She has lost her fast ball and does not know how to throw a slow curve....It is a tribute to Lindsay Lohan's sex appeal that awful as she is, she still tilts towards the attractive range.
Has Madonna made a public statement as to whether or not Gov. Palin can attend her divorce proceedings?
I know, the Gov. probably wouldn't want to attend anyway, as she has much more important things to do....but that didn't stop Maddie the first time.
Locke argued that the four basic God-given rights were LIFE, HEALTH, LIBERTY, and PROPERTY.
Somehow the left doesn’t believe in private property (or to some extent in liberty).
I still like all four of these rights, and think they are universally valid.
When I heard Obama talking to Joe the Plumber about how he was going to redistribute Joe’s wealth, it just reminded me of a pickpocket. Even if he’s going to redistribute the money among the Hollywood elite, or among his associates, it’s still a crime against the God-given right of PROPERTY.
Audacious.
I don’t know why the left is so anxious about private property.
Proudhon did write early on that property is theft, but at the end of his life in his book on Theorie de la Propriete, he argued that he had gotten it wrong, and that in fact, private property is the pole of the prole, and the only stay against the monolithic power of big government. It gives Joe the Plumber (or Madonna) a stake in civic life, and divides the power so that it doesn’t all belong to Senator Pickpocket or whoever happens to be in the Oval Office.
I don't understand why Obama thinks he has the right to redistribute other people's money, or why he's picking on Joe the Plumber. Would he dare to say this same thing to Madonna?
I shudder to think what that 50 year old cooter looks like.
Ritchie had to be in it for the money. I wouldn't dip that for all the Scotch in Edinburgh.
Althouse ...Imagine Ms. Ciccone when she saw his shcok. And stop telling me to imagine your shcok or I will want compensation.
Hey, I finally figured out who Titus is!
mj - you misspelled a word - you wrote "horeshit" - I think you meant "whoreshit".
He should get as much money as the law permits.
She probably pays no US taxes. As a high earning ex-pat she probably has all of her income shielded from the IRS.
So she can support the sissy Obama without having to pay for his horeshit.
Only the middle class will pay for the Idiot's plans. Twas always thus.
Maybe if she hadn't traded her face for her ass this tragedy would never had occurred.
Ritchie is a male chauvinist who insisted for years that Madonna behave like a 'traditiional' female (including where they lived, how she dressed, when she worked, etc.)
Surely everyone realizes that the demise of their marriage was accelerated because she began to break free of his control, and he began to take advantage of her income.
Of course he will not want to accept her money, but being fair-minded, should accept one million per year of marriage.
I think we should pressure how celebrities who love Obama to disclose their tax returns.
We can see how they shield their money. Wesley Snipes just took it too far and paid no taxes. You have to cough up something.
But even the Wall Street tycoons pay more in taxes than Hollywood celebrities.
And stop telling me to imagine your shcok or I will want compensation.
A palate-cleanser.
"And stop telling me to imagine your shcok or I will want compensation."
Think small, think very very small.
50% of everthing she made while married to her.
It is only fair.
Trey
I too might become a socialist if I could get my share of both of their money.
Obama is running ads non-stop declaring that 95% will not pay more taxes and that no one earning less than $250k would pay more. That doesn't seem to conform to what he told Joe Wurzelbacher, the plumber.
I am sure that the $250k is a lie though, since it most assuredly is the married filing joint figure, and not the one that those of us who are single would face. And, I can't believe that Obama is stupid enough not to know this difference.
We are all socialists now. We own the banks, insurance companies and auto plants.
Now back to Madonna. Please repect the Material Girl. She is beautiful, fabulous body, great ass, nice tits and her songs are amazing. And not talk about her cooter that is completely inappropriate and should immediately be deleted. That is juvenile and dirty talk.
And not talk about her cooter that is completely inappropriate and should immediately be deleted. That is juvenile and dirty talk.
She was hot 25 years ago and now she's a dried up has been that's been banged shut more than a storm door in Maine. I don't mind a loose girl but that broad had no taste. I mean she was riding Dennis Rodman for the love of the saints. I bet that cooter has an echo. Probably has it's own gravitational pull and weather system too.
And, I can't believe that Obama is stupid enough not to know this difference.
I don't know about his smarts. You think someone who had his kind of coin would get those ears pinned back. Heck of Nancy and Old Joe can get some botox, he could at least spring for an ear job.
I bet if he ran real fast he'd get airborne.
McCain could use a nice skin peel though. In this day and age, there is no reason to look like Mathusala.
He should get half of their combined assets accumulated during the marriage and none of her money from before that, in my opinion.
"I bet that cooter has an echo."
The story I heard is that Rodman fell in. Dark in there, he was feeling around trying to get out when he bumped into Warren Beatty.
"Warren, you got a flashlight man?" he asked.
"Nope, but it is all good" Warren replied.
"Shit man, we'll be stuck in here forever" was Rodman's retort.
"We are fine. I found my keys, we'll drive out."
Trey
In all seriousness, Revenant is right, in my opinion. Plus, if she is the higher income earner, a percentage of her future income should go to him as a supplement toward maintaining a standard of living as close as possible to the level they attained during their marriage. Marriage is about sharing. Don't want to share? Don't marry.
Same in regards to their dependent children: Unless one is proved to be an unfit parent, the rights and responsibilities of parenting should be equally shared.
By the way, they each were foolish not to draw up a prenuptial aggreement but they are probably discovering that for themselves right about now.
To suggest, in 2008, that he deserves less than half because he is a guy is simple blatant sexism and if the sexual identities were reversed, many so-called feminists would be outraged at the suggestion.
None. A man with as subliminal a name as "Guy Ritchie" should have all the money he needs. Why give Madonna's hard-earned money to a Richie Guy?
If you think I'm actually going to show my shcok around these parts, you're sorely mistaken.
Criminey. I really need to use the "preview" mode before I post.
Ritchie should be sure to demand Madonna take all those leftover copies of "Sex" and "The English Roses" with her.
Immaterial Girl.
dannyboy wrote "I bet that cooter has an echo. Probably has it's own gravitational pull and weather system too." Oh that is hilarious! I'm imagining cold fronts, thunderstorms, maybe a hurricane or two.
I'm actually surprised Ritchie and Madonna held together as long as they have. And I wonder what finally drove them apart.
tmink, I first heard that joke in Jr High. 32 years ago. The classics will always be funny.
The bimbo who said she wanted to kick Sarah Palin's ass is calling someone else emotionally retarded.
She's been looking like Iggy Pop for over a year now. The man deserves substantial compensation for that alone.
I thought Ritchie had already said that he didn't want a dime of her money.
The Madonna clown car cootch just lost another passenger.
And this one wants a partial refund.
Did they get married in the US or the UK? If there is no prenup, sounds like the UK. If so, this is probably closest to the McCartney divorce and she only got 50M out of a Billion or so.
Jeff, me too! First time I have gotten a chance to use it!
Trey
Pogo said...
The Madonna clown car cootch just lost another passenger.
I'm her biggest fan, but that imagery is funny. Clown car cootch!
I just ordered the new Obama t-shirt Madonna is offering on her website with a big picture of Obama on the front with EXPRESS YOURSELF right underneath and Vote Obama on the back.
Madonna's totally in bed with Obama now. I would think he had to approve.
We have to refill the lady's coffers now that her reptilian ex is going to get his hands on her ass-busting earned money.
"Guy wants to make himself out to be a gentleman who's above money," the Madonna pal said hours after the couple confirmed they're splitting.
"If only that was the case. The truth is he's looking for a nice piece of the pie."
After Dennis Rodman and A-Rod have had their slice, how much can there be left for Guy?
It should surprise no one that Madonna is a $uccubus. (I learned all about them on South Park.)
Wasn't there some horrible company that was printing "Team Aniston" and "Team Jolie" t-shirts after the Brad Pitt-Jennifer Aniston divorce? Can we have "Team Madonna" and "Team Ritchie" shirts? Show where our important loyalties lie.
dannyboy - She was hot 25 years ago and now she's a dried up has been that's been banged shut more than a storm door in Maine. I don't mind a loose girl but that broad had no taste. I mean she was riding Dennis Rodman for the love of the saints.
That isn't the worst of it. She was carpet-munching Sandra Bernhard.
And she has an IQ of over 140, making her smarter (on paper) than Dubya, McCain, Palin, Obama, or Biden.
But not as smart as Clinton. Who also seemed to have a real, major problem in who he selected for his sexual tastes..
The shock when she married Guy Ritchie was that he seemed on the surface, pretty normal..
The Brit tabloids treated the news as expected - on their knees, saying "Thank you, God! Thank you! For Madonna, on top of Heather Mills..."
"maybe it seems wrong for the guy to take the lady's money"
BULLSHIT!!!! The lady is the main earner and the main earner pays off the lesser-earning spouse in a high profile divorce.
"The real problem is that he became enamored of that Kabbalah horeshit that Madonna's into."
I think the real problem is that he realized that that Kabbalah horseshit is, in fact, horseshit and made the fatal error of telling her so (this according to my favorite newspaper the Daily Mail).
Finally, I kind of nourish the (probably vain) hope that Madonna is smart enough to never get into another serious relationship. If you're in a relationship you have to pay attention to another person and sometimes think about what they might want and I really don't think she has those skills.
I have too pessimistic a view of human (and male) nature to think that there's not some guy who's dumb (or horny or greedy) enough to get involved with her but ... she should know herself better by now.
Meaningless flings are okay and something she can deal with. But she gets interested in people the same way that Dracula does (not my analogy but Courtney Love's back before she became a plastic-surgery eating-disorder freak).
Why is this an issue? He should get exactly what she would get if their finances were reversed. How is this even a debate. Welcome to equality.
michael farris said...
Meaningless flings are okay and something she can deal with. But she gets interested in people the same way that Dracula does (not my analogy but Courtney Love's back before she became a plastic-surgery eating-disorder freak).
She tried to play the suburbanite wife for him and make him happy, and ended up hating him for it. Like really loathing him.
She really should just enjoy her children and career and have great casual sexual relationships with other famous people or hot not famous people that are cool.
Why the hell did she get married again? Marriage is death for most truly creative, anti-establishment types. She'll feel better now, and will be far more inspired than she has been in years.
Regarding the money, I think we are all kidding about him not getting anything. Guy should get what he is entitled to under the law, but he is a worm.
"She tried to play the suburbanite wife for him and make him happy, and ended up hating him for it. Like really loathing him"
I guess that's possible, but I think it's more likely that saw him as a way to be the movie star she's always longed to be, especially when palsing around with Rupert Everett didn't work. Unfortunately she's a really bad actor. Her true gift is as a music video performer where she was and is unequalled. It's a small freaky gift but it's hers. But the things that make her good at that work against her as an actress.
I think the marriage was doomed from the start but especially after the spectacular failure of Swept Away. I'm only surprised ikt took this long.
I think there was also something about the mystique of being an expat in Europe (40 years ago) that she wanted to capture, but that only works if there's an eventual homecoming (see Almovodar's High Heels and tell me that isn't Madonna and Lourdes in 10 years). So she's making her homecoming to a country that ... hasn't really missed her.
"Why the hell did she get married again? Marriage is death for most truly creative, anti-establishment types. She'll feel better now, and will be far more inspired than she has been in years."
Anti-establishment? Madonna? ha ha ha!
I do agree the split might help her revitalize her music (confessions was okay but for the last 15 years she's produced more misses than hits).
And there is something unbecoming (and not so spiritual ms kabbalah horseshit!) about calling her (still) husband 'emotionally retarded' in front of 20,000 strangers. Not a class moment.
Yes, Guy's a guy and maybe it seems wrong for the guy to take the lady's money,
I'm hoping that's just the joke setup and not a reflection of...anything.
Crimso, I love your idea! As a refinement, I think we should all get to pick our favorite (or least favorite) celebrity and have Lord Obama specifically spread their wealth to us.
I would go with the group that bleeds Leonardo DiCaprio dry!
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.
He deserves about $10m/year of marriage for putting up with her.
OTOH, I think WE have to look out for OUR best interests. The world will be a much better place if she becomes Olivia DeHaviland and is never heard from again. How do we best achieve this? By leaving her with all her money, or by taking it all and giving it to the long suffering Guy?
Socialist illuminati that want to spread the wealth must look at the size of the wealth they're spreading. Why take my little bit of mustard, when someone else can afford so much more? We are the ones with the small businesses, they're the ones just getting rich. That's not an even spread.
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