May 23, 2006

"She insulted George Bush, simulated sex and suspended herself from a giant mirrored crucifix, head adorned with a designer crown of thorns..."

Please, won't somebody please pay attention to Madonna!

63 comments:

Paul said...

Who?

Joe said...

I thought it was a reference to Nancy Pelosi. Nevermind.

JCJim said...

Same OLD shtick. Such courage to take on the Church, such controversy! I can hear the self-congratulation now. Call me when she strips out of a burka on stage, dangles off a crescent moon or impersonates Mohammad. Then I will call her controversial and courageous.

tiggeril said...

Amen, jcjim.

Besides, she's already done this. We haven't forgotten Like a Prayer.

Goesh said...

I want to see her humping the hump of a camel while wearing a burka - let's see how frisky that heifer really can be....

SippicanCottage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JimK said...

Boooooring. Let's see her ride a crescent and insult Mohammed. THAT would take actual courage.

Elizabeth said...

She got the crown of thorns at a church supply house. What the hell kind of inventory is that? Prayer cards, medallions, rosaries, check. Crown of thorns? Check.

Palladian said...

Liberace was more tasteful.

James Wigderson said...

She forgot to be dropped in a giant jar of urine and have elephant dung thrown at her.

Dave said...

Well, this avowed secularist nevertheless finds Madonna rather odd.

Though, here's a serious question: what's the difference between Madonna and the da Vinci Code?

Both seem blasphemous to at least some religious people, but both can be called "entertainment" by others. (Not that I find either entertaining, or blasphemous.)

So what's the difference? Is there one?

Simon said...

Desperation isn't pretty to watch. "Look at me! Please look at me! Tell me I'm still relevant!" With all the money she's made, and the success she's inexplicably enjoyed (reading the reviews for Ray of Light, one might have expected it would actually not be shit), you would have thought she would developed enough self-esteem to not crave validation so much.

Elizabeth said...

Another impression
comes to mind

vnjagvet said...

Another case of attention deficit disorder of the adolescent type noted of certain professional athletes, movie stars and other entertainers (but not to be confused with the learning disability with a similar name often treated with Ritalin).

Sip and Elizabeth have it nailed with the comparisons to Liberace and the rocker Marilyn Manson.

Keith Richards' hapless recent tree climbing adventure at age 60 plus might also be an example.

"Geldpu" word verification seems fitting to this thread.

madawaskan said...

Madonna suffers from the Hollywood version of attention deficit disorder.

Jacques Cuze said...

Evolution of madonna on althouse....

November 2005, love.
December 2005, stilted, shriveled, goofy.
May 2006, calling her an attention whore.

Richard Dolan said...

Someone has invested mega-millions in this bizarre tour. I've never seen one of her tours, nor would I be interested in buying her music. But the nuttiness of the "idea" behind her presentation, coupled with the relentless focus on the profit column for the record company footing the bill for the whole thing, presents an intriguing contrast.

If it's true as other commenters say that all of this is old hat, just a repackaging of what she's done before, then who do imagine is the target audience for this? Whether or not this s-m cum Catholic thing is Madonna's hang-up, the marketing types at the record company must have a business plan to recoup those mega-millions. I wonder what it is.

madawaskan said...

vnjagvet-

I swear I was editing my comment as to be more politically correct when you beat me to ye olde publish button.....

Argh....

madawaskan said...

vnjagvet-

I think we were on the same wavelength-you were faster.

I'm off to go google "geldpu"...

dick said...

I keep thinking that Madonna reminds me of Dorian Gray. Somewhere there is a portrait of her that makes Helen Thomas look like Miss America.

Sloanasaurus said...

Madonna has been well known for reinventing her image. I was actually looking forward to her next look. However, the latest is a recycled version of a prior reinvention.

Perhaps she needs to rename the title of her tour to "Reunion Tour" or something like that.

Pogo said...

Dear Madonna,

How can we miss you if you never leave?

downtownlad said...

We're talking about her, so it's obviously working.

It's on the front of the Drudge Report too.

Why is this news?

vnjagvet said...

Mad:

It is funny how word associations often govern blog comments, and how the patterns set off the same associations in different people at the same time.

I remember hearing the other use of ADD on a sportscast when Julius Erving (Dr. J) was doing color commentary on an NBA playoff game.

He described the exhibitionistic Dennis Rodman as suffering from that affliction. When the play by play guy tried to correct him, pointing out that ADD was a learning disability, Dr. J merely said to him, "think about it for a minute".

At that point, the pbp announcer started laughing, saying, "now I see what you mean -- he's never going to get enough attention, is he?".

I hope you found something on geldpu.

Michael Farris said...

"head adorned with a designer crown of thorns..."

One does not simply buy off the rack...

Freeman Hunt said...

I posted about this my blog too. You would think that one would act a little less attention hungry with age.

Elizabeth: I also don't understand what the crown of thorns would be doing in the church supply house. For pageants... I hope.

Jacques Cuze said...

You would think that one would act a little less attention hungry with age.

Michael Farris said...

"I also don't understand what the crown of thorns would be doing in the church supply house. For pageants... I hope."

And now, let's have a big round of applause as our semi-finalists for the title Miss Roman Catholic 2006 demonstrate the power of their faith in the martyrdom section of our pageant ...

(I'm goin' straight to hell, I know)

Freeman Hunt said...

You would think that one would act a little less attention hungry with age.

Coming from the quxx-master, that is especially hilarious.

Thorley Winston said...

It's on the front of the Drudge Report too.

FWIW, the Madonna story is below the “fold” on the Drudge Report almost directly below the story about the cloned mules. Make of that what you will.

Personally I never cared much for Drudge (and yes I said the same thing during Clinton’s impeachment) as the site is pretty much all gossip and scandal-mongering with the occasional FREAK and DISASTER story thrown in.

Joan said...

We're talking about her, so it's obviously working.

We may be talking about her, but it doesn't sound as if many (any?) of us will be buying her album or a ticket to this latest pageant. Free publicity is great if it translates into dollars. These days, there are so many content-starved media outlets that I'm not inclined to believe that all press coverage automatically translates into a boost in sales.

Pogo said...

Re: "We're talking about her, so it's obviously working."

Certain things gain notoriety, and wheedle their way into conversations, not because they are of true interest or importance, but because they are minor irritants, like mosquitos or dandruff.

Lacking the cultural equivalent of Off! or Head and Shoulders, I'll have to be satisfied with mockery. When my little brother made himself a similar pest, I sat on him. Can't someone sit on Madonna for awhile?

Elizabeth said...

We're big on pageants down south, with our Yam Queens, Miss Cochon de Lait, and Miss Chicken of Tomorrow, but even in the most Catholic of parishes I've never heard of Miss Crucifixion. Can you see them having to pry that thing off the brow of last year's now-anemic winner?

Palladian said...

Someone's already tried, Pogo. [warning: link not safe for children or other living things]

Didn't quite have the effect you're looking for.

Elizabeth said...

Mary, a passion play isn't funny, but there being an industry of passion play supplies is funny.

Pogo said...

It must be a kind of hell to see the peak behind you, knowing you have already passed the height of your creativity, and are on the downslope.

Is it better to, like Madonna, rage, rage against the dying of the light?
Or would she be a better person to shake loose her adolescent coil, and do something, anything, else?

For it's starting to look like an episode of What Not to Wear, in which Maddie doesn't know she's being secretly taped for looking so clueless and out-of-date, and we get to laugh at her.

Dawn said...

Madonna *snorts* Isn't she British now? Why does she insist on 'shocking' us every few years - Does she really think she's relevant?

Guess those declining CD sales haven't quite made it through the wall of synopants she has.

Verification word: vraza

Ann Althouse said...

I like the new album, "Confessions on a Dance Floor," as I said back here. I praised the new video from it here. I praised the technique for composing the Confessions album here. Anyway, there are many old posts about Madonna, most of them quite positive. So that attempt at showing my "evolution" with 3 posts is completely inaccurate. (Like the rest of X's research?)

Pastor_Jeff said...

She exhorted us to sing along. But few did. A visibly irked Madonna screamed: "Come on you lazy mother******s! Sing!"

Ever the lady, she.

Jacques Cuze said...

Uh, yeah, we agree. Most of 2005 it's love. Late 2005 it's not love. May 2006 it's attention whore. Where do we disagree?

Hey lighten up prof, I just thought it was teh funnay that you be hatin' on Madge.

Bissage said...

WOAH!! Talk about your Pogo/Palladian two punch combo!

Jacques Cuze said...

Hey wait a minute, you're not sensitive because you're thinking I am suggesting her anti-Bush sentiments have changed your thinking (and those of your groupies), are you?

Honestly, that never even occurred to me.

Elizabeth said...

Mary, sounds like an elementary school science fair--everyone's a winner!

I'd be pleasantly surprised, if not shocked, if someday soon we get to see Madonna do a tour of standards, just her in a to die for dress, some Cole Porter, accompanied on piano. What a swell party that would be.

Robert Burnham said...

Please don't mention Madonna, in any context, ever. For any reason.

I'm trying to live the rest of my life without ever being reminded she exists.

Jacques Cuze said...

Apparently you and Opus Dei....

knoxgirl said...

stop saying "teh" you dork, that's so tired.

sorry, ann, delete away!

madawaskan said...

vnjagvet-

I am geldpu-less!

Erh, is it English?

Palladian said...

Elizabeth- The problem with that scheme is that Madonna can't actually sing. She would have done this by now if she could. Her voice is usually processed in such a way that it's just another electronic noise in the dance beat. Cher discovered the same technique and started the loathesome trend of maxing out the digital pitch correction software to get that irritating effect that she used in "Believe". Since then, every pop trollop (male and female) has been processed and reprocessed to make at least nominally "acceptable" sounds come out of those over-developed frames. Madonna would as soon perfom standards with a mic and a piano as get photographed under bright fluorescent lights without makeup.

Sinead O'Connor actually sort of pulled a standards-with-simple-orchestration project off years ago if I recall, but she was already an actual, you know, singer.

Eli Blake said...

Yup. This is a preview of Britney Spears in twenty years.

Ann Althouse said...

This is how Britney looks in her mid-20s. Do you seriously think she'll be in shape when she's pushing 50?

Tibore said...

Oooof! Ouch! Professor Althouse with the swat-down of Britney! Yow, what a harsh comment!

True, though.

And to answer your question: Probably not. Not with the way she looks to be taking care of herself. Few more years, she'll be more Anna Nicole Smith than Madonna.

Bissage said...

I hope they wiped that booth with bleach afterwards.

Dawn said...

I'd be pleasantly surprised, if not shocked, if someday soon we get to see Madonna do a tour of standards, just her in a to die for dress, some Cole Porter, accompanied on piano. What a swell party that would be.

Well, Courtney Love tried it, and look how her career turned out! (The dressed up/cleaned up part, that is).

Simon Kenton said...

Linda Ronstadt did the tour of standards, and the Canciones de mi Padre. But she was a soprano born; these others seem the result electrolyzing such vocal cords as they have.

4therecord said...

I thought her final scene was the best...

http://www.eskimo.com/~noir/ftitles/sunset/sunset06.jpg

'There's nothing tragic about being fifty. Not unless you're trying to be twenty-five." -- Joe Gillis (Sunset Boulevard - 1950)

Elizabeth said...

Palladian, there's no comparison b/w Sinead and Madonna, agreed. Madonna is a better singer now than when she began her career; at least she's mainly past the nasally, higher-pitched stuff of Who's that Girl.

I thought of Britney when this discussion started, since a few years back there was this manufactured image of her as Madonna's protege. But Britney isn't even a bad singer; she's no singer at all. She's got nothing, and worse, no imagination. Madonna seriously overrates her creativity, but she's self-made all the way. Britney is a sad thing, a marginally talented Jazzercise dancer with pimps for parents. I doubt there'll be a Britney career in 20 years.

Palladian said...

"I doubt there'll be a Britney career in 20 years."

There's hardly one now, is there?

I hope she's saving her money.

John said...

With a few tweaks, this old Onion article could be remolded to be about Madge: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28771/

PatCA said...

She reminds me of Joan Crawford somehow...poor Madonna, money can't buy love.

Al Maviva said...

Pope to Monsignor Fang: "Madonna? Didn't JPII excommunicate her or something a couple years before I got here? Wha? Oh, that was that bald O'Connor fellow, the tiger and the lizzard, or whatever? Hmmmm... no, nevermind. Don't bother, really. I'm *sure* it offends God, I just don't think she matters that much. Now about that spaetzle..."

On the merits, never has a woman who pushed sex so hard, been so sexually unappealing to me. She's like a lot of pro sports teams: on paper, she looks pretty strong. But when you get right down to it, there just isn't a lot of play there, probably never was.

Jennifer said...

Seriously, this is why famous people give kabbalah a bad name. Frolicking like a whore and offensively skewering others' religious symbols - classy way to express the piety and deep sense of G-d that comes from true kabbalistic study...Wow, I sound judgmental! Oh well, I can at least admit I have a ways to go in my personal development, and not spew it all over the world as "entertainment".

Dawn said...

The BBC has a clip of her 'performance' on their website, and as Palladian noted above, she can't actually sing, as you'll find as she hits a few clunkers. Plus she features slides of her x-rays and video of her riding accident on the screen behind her. How self-indulgent is that?

Look at me! Look at me! I used to be relevant!

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