Writes Monica Hesse in "RFK Jr. is now handling snakes. What does this mean? Decoding the latest manly video from our secretary of health and human services" (WaPo).
Cheryl cheerleads the removal of a pair of Black Racers from Dr Oz's patio. pic.twitter.com/A0iiRzOeIF
— Robert F. Kennedy Jr (@RobertKennedyJr) May 26, 2026
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"And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well.” (Mark 16:17–18)
There are about a dozen directions this can take. We'll learn more from the comments than we'll learn from Kennedy.
I think my contribution would be to say "If this was easy, everybody would be doing it." Poor Cheryl, though.
a metaphor for dc, monica is otten unintentionally amusing
Now watch the hounds start drawing attention to his dysphonia, by claiming that he's speaking in tongues while handling snakes.
That said, I have a snake guy. First rate coder who grew up in Colombia. He gets 'em. Nothing like what you see here.
Completely non-venomous snakes, no big deal with what RFK is doing. Not exactly "snake-handling" as the WaPo headline writer knows that will be understood.
Archived here, if you want to read it.
https://archive.ph/1l3wS
pentecostal.. suddenly, it ALL makes sense!
the poisonous snakes are in the newsroom
Non-venomous, but they can bite. I know nothing about handling snakes, but I would have guessed you'd want to hold them just below the head rather than by the other end.
I sometimes encounter rattlesnakes on walks in Los Angeles Griffith Park. Usually, they seem to be sleeping. We leave each other alone.
Bobby could have just used a broom to get them away from the patio.
Bobby would do well in a SNL update of their skit:Quien es mas macho?
I'm more troubled by his hanging out beachfront and keeping the tie on.
I'm troubled by his walking around outdoors in his stocking feet. He probably wears $50 socks and he's going to get holes in them.
It sure feels real in your lower intestines, doesn’t it?
Ms. Hesse tries to virtue signal her hatred for the apostate, winds up admitting she's full of shit.
Thanks for the archive link, Aggie. Contra the link headline, thing the article does not do is decode the video. It does manage to sound supremely snarky without saying anything. I guess that’s the point.
Well.... he's a Kennedy, so if he's wearing $50 socks, those are his disposable single-use ones.
A couple of years ago, I had to deal with a non-venomous snake crawling down the sidewalk in the restaurant district of Staunton (pop. 25,000). Well, I didn't have to, but no one else volunteered. It had obviously crossed the street from the pre-Revolution Episcopal church where various founding fathers had met, to eat the rats hanging around the trash cans behind the restaurants, and was heading back home. (Lots of trees and bushes on the church grounds, some no doubt with snake holes under them.) It was rush hour, and there was no way it was going to make it across the street to the church, especially since some drivers would have swerved to run over it. I knew it was non-venomous - black with a white belly and too far from water to be a water moccasin, but didn't want to be bit, anyway. About 2' long, if you're wondering.
A block from there was a group of old guys sitting in front of the since-closed Clocktower Restaurant, as they always did, chatting, eating sandwiches, and drinking beer. I asked if any of them knew how to handle snakes. One fat gray-bearded good ol' boy volunteered and showed me how it's done. Wave one hand a foot or so in front of the snake to get its attention, then grab its neck from behind, quickly, with the other hand, pick it up, carry it across the street, and throw it over the fence.
Now you know.
That would have made a great fodder for a political cartoon in Puck, 150 years ago. What two heads would the snake have?
Big Pharma and Big Food?
He likes animals.
Ann Althouse said...
I'm troubled by his walking around outdoors in his stocking feet. He probably wears $50 socks and he's going to get holes in them.
Agreed.
Barefoot is better.
Nice! Mad respect!
He got bit, which serves him right. I dont' really know why RFK needed to pick them up and display them. Just leave snakes alone if they're non-venamous (sic).
It could only better better if he had a margarita in his right hand!
If Dr. Oz wanted them off the "Porch" - just get a broom.
Did someone mention poisonous snakes in the newsroom? That reminds me of a Washington Post story from (I'm guessing) 30-35 years ago that I've never forgotten. A 16-year-old from Anacostia (D.C. slum) stole the two Gaboon Vipers from the National Zoo. They are among the Top 10 most venomous snakes in the world. He hid in the bathroom at the Reptile House and waited for closing time, then broke the glass, put them in a plastic trash bag, slung it over his shoulder (?!?), and took a city bus back home. It was winter, there was snow on the ground, and they were sluggish from the temperature, but the warmth of the bus woke them up. Just as he was getting off to change buses at 16th and K downtown (very near the White House), one of them bit his shoulder through the bag and his coat. Fortunately for him, he knew how serious that was, and the woman driving the bus believed him when he begged her to call an ambulance immediately. Also fortunate that the hospital was only a few blocks away. The story the next day in the Washington Post reported that he was still in serious condition, would probably survive, but they weren't sure his shoulder would ever recover. A follow-up story a year later reported that he and his mother had moved away, leaving no forwarding address. (It just occurred to me now that that may have been more to avoid paying the medical bills than to avoid notoriety.)
Anyway, part of the story was that, while the police on the scene were calling the National Zoo to ask them to come get the snakes, a D.C. cop who was from Ohio and had collected snakes as a boy heard the "poisonous snakebite at 16th and K" radio call and headed downtown to help. He said he "wondered what kind of poisonous snake was indigenous to 16th and K". Someone wrote a letter to the editor criticizing the Post for not mentioning that their offices are at 16th and K, and they printed it.
One more amusing point in this story that I've never forgotten. The Ohio cop found the snakes on the sidewalk, since they'd crawled out of the trash bag, picked them up by their necks, and tried to bring them inside the emergency room to warm up. The security guard said "I don't care if I'm only a security guard, and you're a real cop, but if you bring those snakes in here I will shoot you." So he had to stand out on the sidewalk holding the snakes in the cold until the Zoo people arrived.
Those certainly look like black racers (Colubrid constrictor, which is a misnomer, since they're not actually constrictors. Typically they subdue their prey by pinning them against something rather than coiling them. Can't be entirely sure without knowing the location, there are a number of subspecies depending on habitat.). Racers are harmless but skittish. Definitely bitey, but no venom involved. The only thing I'd criticize is his form - it's better for both the snake and the handler to hold the snake around the middle of the body. Grabbing them by the tail can put weird tension/stress on the snake and also allows them a lot of room to maneuver to get to the handler. Pinning them at the base of the head can damage them, and also pisses them off more so that if they do get loose they're more likely to strike. For most snakes, if you handle them mid-body, they will eventually calm down and once they realize they're not going to get eaten, both the handler and handlee can relax a little bit.
Racers are usually tough to catch - they live up to their name as they are quite fast. If they weren't pinned in the corner there I'd imagine he'd have about zero chance of actually catching them, they would be long gone.
He's just having a little fun. I brought a snake into the house once to show my girls that there's nothing to be afraid of. Then we studied how to identify the poisonous snakes in the area. Science!
The California way to protect common garter snake
The "snake tunnel" was part of a major environmental protection effort during the BART train extension to San Francisco International Airport (SFO).
To protect the rare reptiles, builders constructed a subway trench and underground tunnels for the trains
Snake Monitors: The project hired special biological teams to look for snakes every day.
The 5-Minute Rule: Workers had to check under all trucks if they were parked for more than five minutes.
Slow Speed Limits: Construction vehicles could only drive 5 miles per hour to avoid running over the reptiles.
Traps and Fences: Crews put up five miles of special fencing and funnel traps. They safely caught dozens of snakes and moved them to aquariums until the heavy digging was done
Costly Construction Delays
Despite all the rules, work had to stop completely two different times. In the spring of 2000, a worker found a single squashed garter snake on a work road. The law forced construction to freeze for 18 days. That single dead snake cost the transit district $1.07 million in project delays. A second snake death stopped work again in 2002.
Racers eat mice. Love ‘em.
@Fullmoon, no one who has ever witnessed a garter snake ball could possibly call tbem “rare reptiles.”
Black racers are nervous, bitey snakes. However, their bites aren't dangerous except for the possibility of infection. I've had to clear them from stables many time. I was always bit (they'll also shit on you) but never with anything worse than mild irritation. The worst bite I've experienced was from an 8-foot black rat snake I tried to shanghai into the rat patrol at the hunt kennels. It's an amusing story I'll share if someone asks.
@Quaestor: Yes, please share.
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How To Get Bitten by a Snake
This is for Eva Marie.
Foxhounds are very sloppy eaters. Consequently, rats are always a problem in the kennel. I think snakes are better than cats in this department. This is a story about a snake I hoped would help suppress the rats infesting a foxhound kennel.
Before the autumn hunting season begins, foxhounds need conditioning in the late summer/early fall. We do this by "roading the hounds", which is nothing but taking the whole pack for walkies. A working pack is usually eight to twelve couples, or up to 24 stubborn canine morons with one-track minds. That takes a bunch of volunteers, which in this case, included me. So there I am, driving to the kennels about an hour past sunup on an August morning, when I see a large snake in the middle of the road ahead, warming up on the pavement. Large is an understatement. It was the biggest eastern black rat snake I have ever seen, well over 7 feet long and as big around as a typical spray can -- a perfect rat exterminator who only needed a secure home with an abundance of snake food for a happy life, i.e., the kennels I was driving toward and less than a mile distant.
So, I stopped and proceeded to collect that reptile, which I did by lightly holding its head down with one foot while I grabbed it just behind its head. What now? My car's a straight-drive. I need both hands to steer and shift gears. Therefore, I can't hold his angry fellow while I finish that last mile to my destination... Aha! There's an empty 50-pound Purina feed bag in my trunk. I'll put the snake in the bag; seal it up as best I can; drive to the kennel, and release the snake there. Perfect. I'm such a genius, I amaze myself.
Now I'm driving on, very satisfied with myself. My only concern is the reaction of the other hound roader waiting for me. Is there a violent ophidiophobe, among them? It will be interesting to find out. And now I've arrived. I must retrieve the bag from the trunk and introduce Mister Slithers to his new home. I pop the trunk and see, not the sealed bag with a snake inside, but the unsealed bag and the last 12 inches of the snake disappearing into my car's bodywork.
Holy shit! This is August. There's hot weather ahead. The snake is going to die somewhere inside my car, and it's going to stink like hell. What to do? Images of my car being sliced open with an arc welder march before my mind's eye. I'm no genius. I'm an idiot with a self-inflicted snake problem.
Days pass, weeks pass, and there's been no sign of the snake and no sign of foul odors emanating from a dead snake. Evidently, Mister Slithers has found his way out through some gap in the bodywork. Hurrah, I'm saved from my own foolishness by sheer dumb luck.
Months pass. It is now a rainy night in mid-November. The snake is long gone, and I need something from my briefcase that's in my trunk. So I pop the lid. The trunk light comes on to reveal THE SNAKE coiled up on my spare tire. Four months have passed, and the snake has been my passenger the whole time. No food or water has passed his snaky lips, thanks to my cleverness. I must get him out of my car before he disappears again. So I grab the nearest coil without considering the status of the snake's business end, which turns out to have almost two feet of freedom to turn and bite me half a dozen well-deserved times on my bare forearm, drawing copious blood and leaving snake teeth behind in the wounds. While it continued to bite, I carried it outside and then threw it into the darkness. The next morning, signs of infection appeared. In the hospital emergency ward, I got antibiotics, antihistamines, tetanus shots, and a hefty bill. Here endth my snake story.
Nice guy, what did he do with them?
These writers live in feeble bubbles where men never do anything mildly dangerous, exciting, daring or wild.
I pick up and release gopher snakes from my back yard all the time. They're generally very calm snakes. Most non-venomous ones are.
Quaestor, what a great story!! I have seen someone with one black rat snake bite, and it was gory enough. I can't imagine what multiple bites looked like. When I saw the RFKJr story my immediate response was that he should have left them alone. If they had to be moved, he picked a terrible way to do it. A snake that has been handled is very different from one that is completely wild.
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