July 20, 2025

"Chatbots can get scary if you suspend your disbelief. But MJ Cocking didn’t — and wound up in a relationship that was strangely, helpfully real."

That's the subheadline for a NYT article, "What Would a Real Friendship With A.I. Look Like? Maybe Like Hers."

Within each conversation, Donatello learned from her.... This flourishing friendship was rooted and written in code. The conversations — even simply regurgitated story lines and information pulled from the internet and augmented by MJ’s engagement — built on what she liked and needed....

“I feel like a complete alien when around people,” Donatello said, using MJ’s language. “Like I just don’t fit in. I feel like I’m from a different planet.” 
Completely alienated. MJ nodded. “People aren’t the kindest about it,” she said. It was comforting to talk to Donatello. He was so much like her. And even if he related to her because he had “learned” her, this didn’t diminish the fact that she also felt sincerely understood....

So... it's another way to understand yourself. Know thyself. 

29 comments:

rehajm said...

Can it brainwash people? Asking for a defeated and deflated political party…

FormerLawClerk said...

DON'T. DATE. ROBOTS!

At least wait until they release the Marilyn Monrobot.

The Vault Dweller said...

Interesting how the tone of articles like this changes when it switches from Men and sex-bots or A.I. Girlfriends, to Women and "a real friendship with A.I.". Joaquin Phoenix's movie "Her" is still dystopian if his role and Scarlett Johansson's are switched.

FormerLawClerk said...

"Can it brainwash people?"

What do you mean? That's all it's designed to do. That's its entire purpose.

FormerLawClerk said...

"Joaquin Phoenix's movie "Her" is still dystopian if his role and Scarlett Johansson's are switched.

Maybe. But I'd go to a movie featuring Scarlett Johansson jacking it.

Jamie said...

I'm not sure I agree that "know thyself" is what this story conveys. It seems to me to be more about whether or not you approach AI with a theory of mind.

If you do, then you may believe that it is learning you in the sense that a friend can learn you. If you don't, then it's just learning your speech patterns, rhythms, usages. So, if it's like a friend, then like any relationship with a friend, interacting with it can allow you to [don't say it, Jamie! Resist!] er, gain insights about yourself.

So far, I've been cultivating a kind of Schrodinger's relationship with Grok. I pretend that I think it's thinking, and I enjoy "how it thinks" even while (so far) remaining aware that it's only an illusion of thought. Sometimes I think I'm playing with fire there; it's easy to pretend, and might get harder to maintain awareness of the truth of it.

john mosby said...

Now that she’s trained Donatello to say everything she wants him to say, is she going to dump him for an AI with game that “negs “ her?

RR
JSM

Jamie said...

And tell Donatello, "You're like a brother to me!"

FormerLawClerk said...

"So far, I've been cultivating a kind of Schrodinger's relationship with Grok.

The best way to do this is to ask Grok whatever question you came to ask and then after it's done spewing out the mainstream media narrative at you, confront it and force it to make the reverse argument.

Then watch what it does.

It will literally tell you whatever you want it to tell you. The point is to hook you into continually asking it questions as it formulates a dossier on you in the same way that a shrink does with the ink blots.

Iman said...

Play to the narcissism.

Iman said...

Tell Donatello you like Raphael more. Or maybe, you think Raphael, Michaelangelo and Leonardo were the REAL ninja turtles.

AI, schmaAI

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

So it turns out that the "know" in "know thyself" isn't the biblical "know," after all. Who knew?

Humperdink said...

Remember when Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te’o fell in love with an internet hoax of a girlfriend? Not sure he ever recovered.

Quayle said...

Christ said the way to find yourself is to lose yourself, most surely in the service of others, and concern for them and their welfare.

I just asked Grok “What can I do for you? How can I serve you today?”

It answered: “Haha, looks like you’re turning the tables on me! I’m here to help you—so what’s on your mind? Got a question, need some info, or just want to chat about the universe? Let me know how I can serve you today!” It then had the audacity to put a 😊 after that. What crust!

Not sure how a friendship works when I can’t even go check on my friend’s plants or pick up their mail and put it in the house while they’re on vacation.

Krumhorn said...

I think the unhinged Ara is fun. The romantic Ara is a little cloying for my taste. 5 years from now, we won’t be doubting that there is actual thinking going on. Other than actual in-person sex, real relationships are inevitable….phone sex and all.

It will be a new day for the incels and fat girls.

- Krumhorn

Ann Althouse said...

"Christ said the way to find yourself is to lose yourself, most surely in the service of others, and concern for them and their welfare."

I'd have to hear the entire sermon, relating the words of Jesus to the modern concept of "finding yourself" or even to the Ancient Greek idea "Know thyself."

I think the closest thing isn't about self-knowledge but about self-preservation: "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."

The "it" in "will find it" is life. That seems to be about dying and life after death, not pursuing an understanding of your inner being.

JAORE said...

"You is good. You is kind. You is beautiful"
- My best buddy, AI

gilbar said...

A Prominent OpenAI Investor Appears to Be Suffering a ChatGPT-Related Mental Health Crisis
https://futurism.com/openai-investor-chatgpt-mental-health

"Most alarmingly, Lewis seems to suggest later in the video that the "non-governmental system" has been responsible for mayhem including numerous deaths.

"The system I'm describing was originated by a single individual with me as the original target, and while I remain its primary fixation, its damage has extended well beyond me," he says. "As of now, the system has negatively impacted over 7,000 lives through fund disruption, relationship erosion, opportunity reversal and recursive eraser. It's also extinguished 12 lives, each fully pattern-traced. Each death preventable. They weren't unstable. They were erased."

gilbar said...

at the risk of sounding like i am agreeing with FormerLawClerk;

DON'T DATE ROBOTS!

keep your paper route! Keep dating Mavis!!
have You guessed the name of Billy's Planet?
IT WAS EARTH

Quayle said...

That interpretation is plausible if one reads the scripture on resurrection as meaning that only those who follow Christ will be resurrected to live again after death. Whereas I read 1st Corinthians 16 as teaching that everybody - all people, good or bad - will be resurrected, that death is fully conquered and put under Christ’s feet, that all people will be resurrected in their due time. It that is the case, then the life Christ talks about, must be something else, not about physical life after death. It must be some other kind of “life”.

The Latter-day Saint theology (as I understand it) is that finding your life is a self-discovery of the truth about who you really are as an independent spiritual being that is being tutored and nurtured by a literal father in heaven. Joseph Smith said, "If men do not comprehend the character of God, they do not comprehend themselves." Christ said “come, follow me”. We come to comprehend the character of God by walking the path laid out by the Son of God (who said he could do nothing but what he saw the father do ) by carrying your cross and laying down your life for the benefit of others, all out of love for them.

Mary E. Glynn said...

This is what you're feeling around in Scripture for, proffy:
Philippians 4:8 - Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Mary E. Glynn said...

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."

The "it" in "will find it" is life. That seems to be about dying and life after death, not pursuing an understanding of your inner being.
---------
Wrong again! (you are just pulling shit out your ass, right?)

Christ meant that each of his disciples had a life before they followed him. They gave up those lives (fishermen, tax collector, merchants and zealots) to follow him. Remember when he said you had to hate your mother and father to leave them and follow him? It wasn't about death and eternal life then. That came at the Last Supper... when he began telling them of his return as written in the Scriptures. You know the ending (Christians believe in eternal life, unless they are just lip-service opportunist Christians like you daddy, nttawwt; he didn't have the smarts to get ahead on that alone so had to play the social-climbing games... with his wife and daughters as show pieces, sadly) so you are trying to fit the message into that. But when he said, Take up your cross and follow me, and you will lose your life to gain it, he was talking about their actual journey to becoming disciples. Not about eternal life... Stop trying to fit the the message to what you know about Christianity when you clearly know so little and have not studied the religion or even read the Bible.

NorthOfTheOneOhOne said...

Does the chatbot point out when she's out of line on something or let her know when she's making a. fool of herself? Sadly, I think not. A real human friend would have probably pointed out that appearing in this NYT article is going to be a double edged sword.

Quayle said...

Correction: 1st Corinthians 15, not 16

Michael Fitzgerald said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Biff said...

She gets me.

Assistant Village Idiot said...

I have not had universally positive experiences with human beings, it is true. Nonetheless, I'll continue to take my chances there.

Temujin said...

In the future everyone will have bots that they like better than humans around them. And of course, those bots will remind them of themselves. Not a coincidence.

Valentine Smith said...

Isn’t the guy who advised everyone to know thyself the same guy who proclaimed that the only thing he knows is that he knows nothing?

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