At first, I thought it might turn out to be a quickly forgotten phase, but our daughter... made it clear she was digging in: Any time I slipped up and referred to him as Papa, she swiftly corrected me. Pretty soon, she began to police my husband’s pronouns as well. Initially, I had tried to pair his new Mommy title with the male pronouns that he uses — a small concession to reality, I guess — but it wasn’t long before our daughter began to insist that he be referred to as she and her.... “She!” she would gruffly instruct me, as I unthinkingly mis-mis-gendered the man I had been married to for 10 years. “Why do you say ‘he’?”...
The daughter is 3 1/2.
In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound: that she has everything she needs — including those attributes that society has normally treated as the provenance of mothers — right here in her two-dad family....
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In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound
She has learned that she can railroad right over you and control you. Good luck in the teen years.
Seems like the kind of guy nobody in their right mind would want to raise a child.
Or, a daughter needs a mother so badly she'll make up a fairy story in order to get one.
"In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound: that she has everything she needs — including those attributes that society has normally treated as the provenance of mothers — right here in her two-dad family...." No she's telling you that she needs a mom and two dads doesn't cut it. Which, if you were listening tells you something about gay marriage and parenting. But I suspect it is something you don't want to here and so you won't.
This guy is fucked in the head and just doesn't know it. Yes, the daughter is telling him something deeply profound but he isn't really listening.
Next she'll be demanding he squats to piss.
“In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound: that she has everything she needs”
Including your identity. Trashing your dignity to humor a toddler is not good parenting. She’s going to grow up to be a nightmare and you could have avoided it with 5 minutes of temperate, reasoned discussion.
What Kate said.
I don’t believe this sociological experiment will end well.
Playing make-believe with a child that young for an extended period of time might let the make believe bleed over into their perception of reality. I'm guessing that the kid may have noticed that a lot of other kids have a dad and a mom for their parents and so she is trying to make that realization fit for her family.
Two men, a couplet, an absentee mother perchance a rent-a-womb.
Transsemantics meets transgenderism.
Kids are great.
How about getting one the old-fashioned way?
The children shall lead us.
How sad this story is.
The WaPo comments are priceless.
If the daughter tells one of them that they are a princess, will they get some funding from the society of royal claimants?
Agree with Kate.
>Writes Richard Just, in "Our daughter wanted a mommy, so she picked one of her dads<
Well, at least 1/3 of the family is normal.
My understanding is that the US has 50,000 adoptions annually. How did these guys make the cut?
The time will come when the little girl will long to know her real mother. Homosexual couples who indulge in the rent-a-womb slave market are just stoking the engine of future discontent.
" a small concession to reality, I guess ".
Very small.
MadisonMan said...
["In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound"]
"She has learned that she can railroad right over you and control you. Good luck in the teen years."
Worse yet, she'll be happy to turn them in for social credit infractions, when they have the force of law.
That girl will be a broken mess by the time she's 18.
So what happens when the little girl wants a pony?
She'll be glad she's here.
Kate got it in one.
Trans/homosexuals with a heterosexual fetish. Sir, where's mommy?
Kids need a mom and a dad. It's deeply essential and ingrained.
Another example of the Great Truth of the Early Twenty-first Century: Man make better women than women do.
"In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound..."
That it's okay to be homosexual as long as you pretend you're not? O-kay.
I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound: that she has everything she needs — including those attributes that society has normally treated as the provenance of mothers — right here in her two-dad family....
She's telling him the opposite, of course, but this is the best she can do in that weird world .
Wait till she wants a pony.
How about getting one the old-fashioned way?
Keep women... wombs affordable, available, reusable, and taxable. Here's to social progress: one step forward, two steps backward. Feminists, take a bow. Women, take a knee to the modern family of misogyny, androgyny, and diversity (MAD).
I second what Kate said.
"telling us something beautiful and profound: that she has everything she needs"
Pops is misreading the playroom.
"We had done everything we could to lay the groundwork for her and her little sister to feel pride in our nontraditional family: We’d stocked up on two-dad children’s books and recounted many times the story of how they’d come into the world with the help of a generous egg donor and an amazing surrogate."
So he and his better half have been having long serious discussions about eggs and sperm and impregnation methodologies with a couple of two-year old girls.
So why not introduce her to her… sorry if I’m out of line for using this word, “biological” mother?
This is child abuse.
We have to put the needs of children above the needs of these mentally ill people who need treatment.
Althouse replaces her “I’m skeptical” tag with an implied “I’m gullible.” I’ll supply the skepticism that’s missing.
My understanding is that the US has 50,000 adoptions annually. How did these guys make the cut?
Without being able to read the article due to paywall, I'd guess that they paid a surrogate to carry the child to term, using one of the men's sperm and the surrogate's (or a donor's) egg.
This is your biological mother and these are your two dads.
Kate has it right, of course. What a sad story.
If I can't say something nice, I'll say nothing at all.
WaPo, what you read when you think 3-year-olds can tell you something profound.
In the end, I’ve come to believe our daughter has been telling us something beautiful and profound
I'm tired of so called adults gaining beautiful and profound insights from children. Been seeing that for decades and it is ridiculous. How about the adults grow up and be responsible like, you know, adults?
Blogger n.n said...
Sir, where's mommy?
The mommy is just a handmaid.
I read the first 25 or so comments in the WaPoo. Talk about a divided country - they are a 180 from the comments here.
Drag shows on the horizon for the poor girl.
Wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and hopin’…
Most likely the kid has been sitting through various storytimes involving a dad and a mom and is fitting her family into those social cues.
It's amusing to see commenters on the right lining up to endorse the idea that a three-year-old has an innate and profound understanding of gender. If the girl said that she was a boy, everyone here would dismiss it as the passing fancy of a toddler and ridicule the idea that she's articulating some deeper truth. But because there's a gay couple involved, her gender-bending child-speak becomes a powerful indicator of grave problems.
This poor child wants a mother, one with the proper pronouns and probably with the proper female parts and looks. She is going to grow up knowing she has been robbed. At this point it is a little late for this but what about words is this man not understanding. A 3 1/2 year old is smarter than her dad about what life really is.
When my niece was the same age she spent hours at a time acting like a cat and insisting everyone play along. Her deep commitment to this seamless bit was simultaneously fascinating and irritating, but she was more or less allowed to live in her own world, and soon the phase passed and she eventually grew up to be a normal, caring, well-adjusted adult.
You let your kid just blatantly misgender you like that?
What could possibly go wrong?
Kate for the win. Kids need a mom and a dad.
We are living in the end times.
What it's telling me is the social mind disease is incredibly prevalent even in very early learning situations.
"In the end, I’ve come to believe..."
In the end, wishful thinking wins out, as it does so very often.
I live in a household where we have a grandma, a mom and a 3-1/2 year old. (And, of course, me.) The toddler has never once asked about her "daddy." Not once. Children can adapt to a lot of situations in life. After all, they're a blank slate. The author could have told the child that some households have mommies and daddies, some have two mommies, some have two daddies, some have one mommy and some have one daddy. Children will adapt to the reality of the situation.
So mature. Does she have a job?
Most comments are going full Karen mode wagging fingers in a lame and impotent attempt to feel Superior. It's completely normal for kids at this age to have imaginary friends.
everything she needs
she NEEDS a mom, you sick freak
Without reading comments - it seems to me that the 3 1/2-year-old child is doing what children that age do: attempting to fit her life into the social norms she sees around her. Don't have a mother? One of these guys must be one, so I'll pick the one who most closely hews to the norms of moms I see around me.
I don't mean this as a commentary on gay people's having children (though I don't believe it's optimal, just as I don't believe single parenthood is optimal). I mean it as a commentary on adults' seeing what they want to see in children's behavior.
The beautiful thing she is telling you is that the LGBTQ media is so powerful it can now hijack another part of women's identity: being maternal.
Happy Mother's Day, ladies. They're coming for your ovaries next.
Makes you wonder who’s the grownup in that household.That little girl is crying out for female nurturing. Find a sister or an aunt or your mom and arrange for the girl to spend some time with them.
37 AM
Blogger Ampersand said...
My understanding is that the US has 50,000 adoptions annually. How did these guys make the cut?
5/12/24, 11:45 AM
Living in N. California I’ve known several gay couples who raised kids and they were fine parents. The kids thrived. I’ve known plenty of straight couples with fucked up kids. It’s all about being a loving parent and giving kids rules to live by.
That kid needs some female adults in her life. She’s begging for it the best way a 3’year old can. You have to pay attention, dad.
"Are women really the only people who can be maternal?"
Yes: Women are really the only people who can be maternal.
It's sad that the obvious biological fact must be re-stated as if it's a new concept, and absolutely pathetic that re-stating it is commonly met with righteous Woke Outrage and condemnation, and maybe even attempts at cancellation.
And:
What Kate said.
Mentally ill personages, creating a mentally ill toddler who'll then be "groomed" by anti-family, Marxist, mentally ill public school employees.
Geez, Howard, how old are you?
She'll get over it.
Is the mommy dad a feminine gay man? Could make a difference.
The child recognizes gender (i.e. sex-correlated attributes), and that humans are binary and complementary. I blame each sex: male and female, each gender: masculine and feminine, respectively, for expressing their nature true to their Nature. Transgenders simulate each gender and their act is normalized through political congruence ("=") under the State-established Pro-Choice religion. That said, under liberal license, social progress includes polygamy, incest, sadomasochism, and diverse other sexual orientations, equivocal and inclusive (DEI).
Living in N. California I’ve known several gay couples who raised kids and they were fine parents.
And then there’s the case of William Dale Zulock and Zachary Jacoby Zulock, charged wh sexually abusing and pimping out their adoptive sons. They lived in Georgia, which might account for the difference (better Child Protective Services).
Have to disagree with you loudogblog. No child has two mommies or two daddies. A household may have two of one or the other if there's more than one child. But that can also occur without the homosexual relationship should say, for example, two siblings with custody move back in with parents. I've seen that.
Blended families are all too common today. My daughter has 2 children, newborns. My son-in-law 4. And primary custody of the other two which is unusual in itself. My wife and I interact with our step-grandchildren more than their actual grandparents. Which is a shame.
As others have mentioned, the young girl in this situation is going to end up a screwed up adult. Hopefully she gets there without totally self destructing during her adolescence. Which of the two males are going to understand and help her through teenage female angst?
That's an interesting question. How does evolution affect our development?
Complementary pairs in couples and couplets. Politics is a salad of chaotic order.
I'm a child. You know how they say some people are old souls. Not me, just the opposite. This is my first rodeo. That's right I just fell off the turnip truck. I was in fact born last night.
There are so many was this situation could go sideways in the coming years that I won't try to pick one. Given that the normal burden teenage girls apparently have, the forecast for this young one is cloudy.
Imagine growing up, and slowly coming to realize that you were commissioned, like a piece of garden art, by a couple of self-absorbed perverts. And the society those perverts bought you into is itself so perverse that it tolerates their crimes, and some members of it even approve of them. I suppose it's not a whole lot worse than coming to realize that you are a slave, in a society whose laws tolerate slavery. Although a slave would at least have a real mother.
Howie is here to help.
Semper Fudd
(Don't blame the turnip truck. He has exposed himself to toxins wearing an Inga T-shirt mask)
"Which of the two males are going to understand and help her through teenage female angst?"
Or her transition.
“Initially, I had tried to pair his new Mommy title with the male pronouns that he uses — a small concession to reality, I guess —“
WTH
I guess Howard had 2 daddies, too.
2 daughters and only one wants mom?
I find it interesting that so far as I could see, everyone who’s commented seems to accept the story as true. I didn’t. Maybe I’m cynical.
This is so sad.
And so emblematic of our sick culture.
I guess this why the trope, 'follow the science" was so jarring to me during covid. The leftist are never wanting to follow the science.
Anthropologically, the successful rearing of humans, requires Male and female parents. The tension between the two is what the child needs. Mothers, are too protective, and fathers, are more hands off. That tension is important for the child to learn consequences. Also the interaction of the parents is needed to model how the rolls differ between the sexes.
You can teach a bear to ride a bicycle. That does not mean its natural or useful. I also probably means the bear can never, learn how to survive in their natural habitat.
Living in N. California I’ve known several gay couples who raised kids and they were fine parents. The kids thrived. I’ve known plenty of straight couples with fucked up kids. It’s all about being a loving parent and giving kids rules to live by.
It's true that kids need loving parents and rules to live by. But adult outcomes are better for kids with two parents, one of each sex. Committed gay couples can do the job, certainly, but on average they won't do as well as ordinarily loving straight parents.
That kid needs some female adults in her life. She’s begging for it the best way a 3’year old can. You have to pay attention, dad.
At least she needs some female adult presence.
And this kid is lucky that her parents are both men. I know a guy whose single parent was a woman who understood the need for a boy to grow up with an adult male presence... and delivered him into the hands of a "nice" male neighbor, older, married, who abused him for years, down the street and out of sight.
This girl-child is a lot less likely to be abused by an adult female presence these men might eventually decide to introduce into her life. (I'm sorry to say it, gentlemen, but this is one of those sex differences almost all of us here understand. I am not intending to tar any of you with this brush, nor to take any credit myself for having statistically - and in fact - non-abusive lady parts and hormones.)
Howard said...
Most comments are going full Karen mode wagging fingers in a lame and impotent attempt to feel Superior. It's completely normal for kids at this age to have imaginary friends.
I feel bad for gay men. I think the number of them that desperately want monogamy and a family would put more effort and care into raising children on aggregate than most straight couples. But they are missing something and even they know it.
In this case the kids have to come first.
Howard cares more about the needs, feelings, and well being of two grown men who are LARPing womanhood than a 3 1/2 year old girl who has absolutely nobody looking out for her and protecting her.
A 3 1/2 year old girl was born into this world, abandoned by her parents, and given to two men to raise like a pet while they indulge in mental illness. The chances of her having healthy relationships with men and having a happy family in the future are very small.
everyone who’s commented seems to accept the story as true.
I have avoided commenting on the specifics because I wasn't there and have no idea what actually happened. It is clear that the author has an agenda that has influenced the story. It is cherry picked.
Is it too late to get Pioneer 10 back?
I’m not sure if it’s a true story or not. Perhaps it’s a subtle transgender propaganda piece. If it is a true story I do hope that at an appropriate age these guys explain what biology and sex are to this young girl so that she’s not totally confused. The idea that someone can change their sex magically does seem like a fantasy or wish of a 3 1/2 year-old fulfilling a deep emotional need which we all have to be nurtured.
I believe that a gay man can be nurturing and maternal and still be a man. I’ve known many gay men who were very nurturing and very feminine, but they were still men. That’s probably too confusing for a 3 1/2 year-old to understand but I think eventually they will have to explain that to her. She’ll figure it out eventually that her mommy dad is a man or she’ll be a complete lunatic.
"I have come to believe that our daughter is telling us exactly what we want to hear."
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