The top comment over there is another ancient-times bar joke: "A Roman walks into a bar, holds up 2 fingers and says '5 Beers Please,'" which is responded to with another Roman joke: "Listen, barkeep, if I'd wanted to order two or more, I would have ordered two or more!! Now bring me my martinus!"
I want to listen to the podcast. Some Redditors are discussing it as if the Sumerians would equate walking into a bar through the door and walking into a bar by missing the door and hitting the exterior wall. The dog did the latter sort of walking-into because he couldn't see, and then he announced that he would open one eye.
So it was like the old 3 Stooges running joke, "I can't see! I can't see! I got my eyes closed"?
But why was it a dog? And why open only one eye? Is this a penis joke? Like the one-eyed cat peeping in a seafood store?
As I said, I will listen to the podcast.
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31 comments:
I thought martinus must be one, martini must be more than one was a joke from Wayne and Schuster--Canadians who were on Ed Sullivan a lot.
Sorry, but the oldest known joke is a fart joke.
“This has never been seen in the history of the world. A young wife sat on her husband’s lap a did not fart.”
This joke was translated from the cuneiform in 2008 and dates back to 1900 BCE. So Dave Barry is merely the latest (or among the latest) in a line of comedians going back thousands of years.
There’s also a pun embedded in “The Odyssey,” when Odysseus tells the cyclops that his name is “Nobody” so later the cyclops yells out that “Nobody” has attacked him so no one comes to help.
Romans wouldn't tell a joke like that--it's not an ancient joke, it's a modern joke set in ancient times. As for the dog, I don't see any reason to think it is referring to opening an eye. It's probably a pun and we don't get it because we don't know all the meanings of "bar."
Another old joke apparently first told about Caesar Augustus: The Emperor is touring the cities and towns of his empire when he saw a man who looked just like him.
“You resemble me. Was your mother in service at the palace?”
“No, my lord, though my father was.”
I get the joke. Can't see a thing but I can sure af see this drink. Because a real drinker can alwsys find a drink.
Oh so I've heard.
"Sorry, but the oldest known joke is a fart joke."
What are you sorry about? No one said the joke discussed in the post is the oldest joke.
Here's a more recent joke, oft told by Rosanne Rosannadanna: "Never mind."
As for the "Roman" jokes -- yes of course they are modern jokes *about* Romans. I didn't point that out because it's obvious.
Ann Althouse said...As for the "Roman" jokes -- yes of course they are modern jokes *about* Romans. I didn't point that out because it's obvious.
The subject is ancient jokes and you introduce it as an ancient joke. So, without context, sure, obvious. With context, not so much.
"I get the joke. Can't see a thing but I can sure af see this drink. Because a real drinker can alwsys find a drink."
I would guess that "I’ll open this one" refers to a container of whatever beverage they had in Sumerian bars. The dog is saying, essentially, I'm such a big drunkard that it's made me blind plus it makes me want to drink so badly that I'll open whatever I can get my hands... paws on and drink that.
That seems to be the obvious meaning, though it does not explain why it's a dog.
@tim
Are you saying you thought I was a complete idiot?
Two Finns are out at a remote cabin for several days, drinking. Finally, they run out of booze.
One Finn says, "I'm gonna go check the wood shed. Maybe there's something to drink in there."
He comes back with a gallon can and says, "I found this wood alcohol, but if we drink it, we'll go blind."
The other Finn looks around at the cabin and says, "I've seen enough."
@Althouse, it’s just an expression. From time to time I remember my manners.
In 1967 the University of Chicago published a book of translations of ancient texts. Included on pages 82-83 is what might be the earliest known business complaint letter, regarding treatment of servants, money owed, and quality of materials provided, from a customer to a copper ingot dealer in Babylon, around 1750BC. The letter is written in cuneiform on a clay tablet.
For pure entertainment, I highly recommend the other translated ancient letters in that publication. Putting your thoughts in text is an eternal risk.
There is a brisk discussion still ongoing about the quality of the copper ingots supplied by Ea-Nasir in 1750BC, and the validity of the complaints by his customer, Nanni, who also owes Ea-Nasir a bit of money for previous deliveries. Is the complaint valid, or just whining to justify an unpaid debt?
Perhaps the dog can see the truth, if he ever leaves the bar before its midnight closing.
The linked comment thread goes to an analysis I find compelling. The "I'll open it/this/them" refers to the [both, as a set of] eyes, which in the original language uses "eyes shut" and "blind" interchangably.
We might do as children do and conflate all of recorded history prior to our own memories into one flat page, and remember being taught that an ancient Greek word meaning 'dog-like’ was applied to the man (and philosophical tendencies of) Diogenes of Sinope in 400 BC, giving us the modern term: "cynic". Ignore the difference in dates between the Greeks and Sumers.
So a cynic, eyes voluntarily closed [against all unplesantness], strays into a tavern [where people go to inebriate / self-medicate against their unpleasant existence], and decides to open his eyes.
It may not be a true interpretation but it has the virtue of a more modern joke-like context.
... quo in genere est Siculi illud, cui cum familiaris quidam quereretur quod diceret uxorem suam suspendisse se de ficu, 'Amabo te,' inquit, 'da mihi ex ista arbore quos seram surculos.'
... to this group belongs the quip of the Sicilian to whom a friend was lamenting because, as he told him, his wife had hanged herself from a fig-tree, and who replied, 'Do please let me have some cuttings from that tree of yours to plant.'
Cicero, de Oratore, II lxix 278
Here's an old German language class joke......
Q: "What comes between fear, and sex??"
A: "Funf......what were you thinking?"
I'm sure I've shared this here before, but I still like the joke.
""Sorry, but the oldest known joke is a fart joke."
What are you sorry about?"
Now that's funny.
Pyramus and Thisbe was written by Ovid in his Metamorphoses in the first century, long after the dog joke. The story demonstrates the development of humor over the centuries. The tale has two young lovers separated by a wall with a famous crack in itself. This crack can be interpreted as a joke about female genitalia, or perhaps even as the first "glory hole" recorded in literature, at least according to my very gay Latin teacher in high school back in the 1970s.
So in only 20 centuries or so, the civilized world went from recording the hilarity of drunk dog analogies to sex jokes. Progress! And today, after 20 centuries more, we have The Aristocrats, and of course Biden.
And just a few centuries back, we have a punchline for the ages: " "O wonder! How many goodly creatures are there here! How beauteous mankind is! O brave new world, that has such people in't!"
"A Roman walks into a bar, holds up 2 fingers and says '5 Beers Please,'" ..no Roman would ever have said that. Wine drinkers one and all. Should have read...a Visigoth walks into a bar...
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar...
I stick with the modern classics.
@Joe Smith A rabbi friend of mine was at some kind of ecumenical convention, and as he went into an elevator, he saw that a priest and an Imam were getting on as well.
Hey, he said, is this some kind of joke?
The Greeks had basically a joke in their pantheon: Priapus, the god of the giant erection. He ended up taking on the role of guardian of gardens, some believing he was the inspiration for the garden gnome. There is a collection of poems about what exactly Priapus will do if you violate the garden which almost invariably involve... well, when all you have is a huge johnson everything is solved with a huge johnson, if you get my drift. I know there is at least one story of him beating something to death with his member.
Of course, the Greeks were pretty funny. Even the Spartans would get into the act in their own way.
Joe Smith said...
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar...
...You'd think one of them would've seen it.
A 3-legged dog walks into a saloon and says, “I'm looking for the son of a bitch who shot my paw”...
‘Two Finns are out at a remote cabin for several days, drinking. Finally, they run out of booze.
One Finn says, "I'm gonna go check the wood shed. Maybe there's something to drink in there."
He comes back with a gallon can and says, "I found this wood alcohol, but if we drink it, we'll go blind."
The other Finn looks around at the cabin and says, "I've seen enough." ‘
Two days later, the Finns (brothers Tim and Neil) and their band Split Enz completed their breakthrough album, “True Colors”.
Indigo Red said...
Joe Smith said...
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar...
...You'd think one of them would've seen it.
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbit "What are you doing here?" He answers- "I think I'm a typo."
And there's the classic: An Irishman walks out of a bar. Hey! It could happen!
There are very few original jokes. Almost all "new" jokes are variations on old jokes. When you come acros a truly new joke- you know it. I can think of one I can't figure out the predecessor for that I heard at a conference- and I have since heard variations on it since.
I'm going to be the first to open a restaurant on the moon. I'm going to advertise- "No atmosphere. Just good food." And it's going to have an outside terrace with a view that will take your breath away...
I have read many joke books in my life. One of the best is Milton Berle's Private Joke File: Over 10,000 of His Best Gags, Anecdotes, and One-Liners Not a one in the book is truly original- but they're all funny. I can't remember them on a whim. but any occasion, no matter how somber, my subconscious dredges up a joke that's appropriate for the occasion. Well, appropriate if you're like me and take humor as a serious part of life... so ofttimes I don't share them. Some people just don't appreciated jokes at funerals. And for the next few weeks I'd avoid telling jokes about the Queen to SAS personnel.
And right after I hit enter what shows up on my Facebook feed? A Queen photomeme. Don't share it with your SAS buddies...
https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10227626409426797&set=gm.4964886126945586&idorvanity=3568573696576843
And right after I hit enter what shows up on my Facebook feed? A Queen photomeme. Don't share it with your SAS buddies...
https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10227626409426797&set=gm.4964886126945586&idorvanity=3568573696576843
Aarghhh... two blooger "Whoops! That's an error!" in a row. I apologize if this posts multiple times.
And right after I hit enter what shows up on my Facebook feed? A Queen photomeme. Don't share it with your SAS buddies...
https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10227626409426797&set=gm.4964886126945586&idorvanity=3568573696576843
Really like the German language class joke, took me a few seconds, but the funf should have an umlaut: fünf
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