April 24, 2022

"Mr. Kondo... has long known that he didn’t want a human partner. Partly, it was because he rejected the rigid expectations of Japanese family life."

"But mostly, it was because he had always felt an intense — and, even to himself, inexplicable — attraction to fictional characters.... Mr. Kondo sees himself as part of a growing movement of people who identify as 'fictosexuals.'... He wants the world to know that people like him are out there and, with advances in artificial intelligence and robotics allowing for more profound interactions with the inanimate, that their numbers are likely to increase...."

I'm getting the sense that it's not going to be enough that we regard him with empathy and refrain from saying this is trivial or mentally disordered. "Fictosexuals" will demand full respect.

Or so I'm thinking, as I read the long NYT article "This Man Married a Fictional Character. He’d Like You to Hear Him Out. Akihiko Kondo and thousands of others are in devoted fictional relationships, served by a vast industry aimed at satisfying the desires of a fervent fan culture." 

[T]he idea that fictional characters can inspire real affection or even love may well have reached its highest expression in modern Japan, where the sentiment has given rise to a highly visible subculture and become the basis for a thriving industry. The Japanese word for the feelings those characters inspire is “moe,” a term that has become shorthand for just about anything that is viscerally adorable. ...

For some, the relationships represent a rejection of the entrenched “breadwinner-housewife” model of marriage in Japan, said Agnès Giard, a researcher at the University of Paris Nanterre who has extensively studied fictional marriages. “To the general public, it seems indeed foolish to spend money, time and energy on someone who is not even alive,” Dr. Giard said. “But for character lovers, this practice is seen as essential. It makes them feel alive, happy, useful and part of a movement with higher goals in life.” 

Rather than becoming more isolated as a result of their relationships, women benefit from the elaborate communities that develop around them, Dr. Giard said. In her experience, women see the fictional marriages as empowering, “a way to challenge gender, matrimonial and social norms.”...

The article makes no mention of the declining birth rate in Japan

Here's the Wikipedia article, "Moe":

Sometimes feelings of moe towards fictional characters include "sexual excitement", or are understood in the context where "lots of beautiful girls and boobs appear." In these cases, feelings of pure affection that gradually become stronger over time can lead to these feelings of eroticism. 

Moe, however, is also considered to be distinct from pure lust. While small amounts of lust is generally considered moe, a feeling that focuses too heavily on lust is considered outside the scope of moe. In a light novel by Nagaru Tanigawa, one of the characters mentions that the distinction between moe and pure lust can be made based on whether one can still maintain feelings of affection even after one has indulged in masturbation. According to commentator, Tōru Honda [ja] who considers moe to be "romance within one's head", the ideal kind of love within moe is "romantic love".

ADDED: Meade noted that phrase in the last paragraph — "pure lust." It's used there to mean only lust, but it's also reads as something inherently impossible: Can lust be pure? Can the sin be a virtue? My response was: "Pure Lust" is the title of a book by Mary Daly — "Pure Lust: Elemental Feminist Philosophy." And I've read it. Long ago. I can't remember what meaning Daly intended to convey by modifying "lust" with "pure."

The publisher's note on that book is rather impenetrable:  

In this groundbreaking feminist text, [Mary Daly] extends the ³deviant philosophy² developed in her classic Gyn/Ecology, and draws from her Webster¹s¹ First New Intergalactic Wickedary of the English Language in order to deconstruct/reconstruct our speech and expose the assumptions behind our thought processes. She uncovers the patriarchal reversals that have made us the inheritors of a belief system of the absurd, exhorting us to break out of the guilt and fear in which the male ³sadosociety² entraps us. A work of flamboyant brilliance.

I genuinely don't know if those superscript numbers are in the original. Maybe they are quote marks that got corrupted.

43 comments:

Enigma said...

Previously known as fetishists.

This isn't really news for japan, just the adult sexualized version of fantasy relationships. If they don't breed they'll die off and be remembered as an evolutionary dead end.

Some decades ago the Tamagotchi mobile electronic "pet" was a big fad even in the US.

https://tamagotchi.com/

Rollo said...

Can't we just like things without wanting to fuck them.

Maybe that's why we can't have nice (unfucked or unfuckable) things.

I would call this Freud's revenge -- his way of denying that he's dead or irrelevant -- but since it's Japan, anime is probably to blame.

Make the eyes big enough and round enough and who wouldn't fall in love with Jane Eyre or Emma Woodhouse?

Bob Boyd said...

Once you go metal, you'll never settle.

Chanie said...

Time to incorporate fictosexuality into our K-3 curriculum. Let’s get Daddy, Yoda, and Me into the libraries, and print up worksheets: “Is your imaginary friend more than a friend?” If so, don’t worry, the teachers will keep it secret so the parents can’t interfere and impose their factonormative values.

David Begley said...

Elizabeth James (Natasha Richardson) in “The Parent Trap.”

Bob Boyd said...

A similar thing happened a long time ago when they invented socks. There was a pretty big movement of people who identified as 'hosers.'

Humperdink said...

"Fictosexuals" will demand full respect.

Nope, they will demands rights and privileges heretofore unknown. Add another statistically insignificant nutcase group to lefty family. Coming to a country near you.

Temujin said...

Yes, I think you may have identified the next 'cause', the next group claiming victimhood based on lack of respect. Not sure the Trans community, or the 'hey-I'm-not-sure-which-gender-I-feel like-today community is going to take this. Probably not well. Could be an internecine battle coming up between the Fictosexuals and Team Trans.

And what of the Furries?

Anyway, we have to admit that there is a huge, seemingly growing segment of the population in Western Europe, the US & Canada, Japan, China, Russia, and probably other places, where the young are more comfortable relating to others only online- not in person. Relating to others while alone in their bedroom or a basement, or their solo apartment. Not allowing any actual physical contact. Sex is no longer a regular part of being human. Creating a world in which they can be superheros and have that special relationship with a fictional character, or at the very least, another human acting anonymously.

So- as the sun sets on some of the global population, while they play games with their genders or abstain from being actual humans at all, let's thank God for those in the Southern Hemisphere who are still having sex and babies. The future of humanity may lie with them.

Wilbur said...

It's unclear to me what sort of fictional characters these people find attractive - is TV, movies, music videos, novels the source for the characters? Or do they just make them up in their head, springing from their imagination?

My attitude towards adult sexual practices is almost always Whatever Paints Your Wagon. I find this difficult to even imagine what it's like.

tim in vermont said...

There is a song about a guy who is in love with the “girl on the billboard,” he keeps pestering the artist who keeps telling him she’s not real. But I might not mind having that hologram from Blade Runner 2049 hanging around my apartment even if she wasn’t real.

Marek said...

I guess when your aim is to declutter your personal space to the extreme, human partners filling your house with their biological body will no longer spark joy. What is that? That is a different Kondo?

Iman said...

Fuck me to tears, this is so ridiculous.

Iman said...

Hosers, knobs or yohans, Bob Boyd.

MadTownGuy said...

"I'm getting the sense that it's not going to be enough that we regard him with empathy and refr"ain from saying this is trivial or mentally disordered. "Fictosexuals" will demand full respect."

...and celebration...and the right to groom.

farmgirl said...

Pure: carnal.
Base.
Lowest Common Denominator.
Are we back to the beginning??

Amexpat said...

There's a large element of Fictosexual with the sexual fixation that many have with movie stars or pop idols in that the attraction is mostly towards a fictional persona.

Sebastian said...

""Fictosexuals" will demand full respect."

Once the traditional sexual order was gone, no limits remained. Now anything goes, and none dares say no.

Jamie said...

This is just... sad.

I mean, sure, as a kid I had crushes on all sorts of fictional characters - Sherlock Holmes probably at the top of the list, and that was before they started getting attractive young(ish) actors to play him. But even as a kid, I understood that fictional characters were fictional.

I suppose, if I set aside the sadness of it all, I can see the appeal of a 2-dimensional love interest whose responses are, whatever you may tell yourself, 100% in your control. I do wonder how jealousy works in this scenario: once you've convinced yourself that a particular fictional character is yours, what do you do when you find out some other fictosexual has also laid claim to him? (Her? Xer? Whatever?)

Mark said...

"Fictosexuals" will demand full respect.

Of course. Why should this be any different from any of the other fantasies that have demanded and been accorded affirmation in the last seven years, including forced affirmation by law?

Lurker21 said...

That guy with those books might make some metafictional use of this.

Jasper Fforde?

Like the woman (or women) who married tree(s), this may only be a passing fad. Pansexuality and polyamory are more likely to stick around.

there is a huge, seemingly growing segment of the population in Western Europe, the US & Canada, Japan, China, Russia, and probably other places, where the young are more comfortable relating to others only online

True, and some people may already consider themselves to be married to virtual reality characters, but the possibilities for interaction with characters in books are more limited.

What happens when your common-law spouse avatar decides to sue you though? And where does the trial take place? In VR?

jerpod said...

Back in the early eighties, I knew a guy who wrote funny radio ads for a living. The punch line for one he did for a local hamburger joint went something like:

"I don't just love this hamburger, I respect it! So me and my hamburger...we're gettin' married. That's right. I'm marrying a hamburger!"

It was very funny.

Mark said...

And since these characters have not consented to the relationship, it is essentially a form of rape and slavery.

Such things never turn out well in the rest of fiction land. The characters rebel at being victimized in this way. Killing their owner/masters and rampaging society.

Scott Patton said...

There are many examples of mans' aggression, cruelty, and downright sadistic behavior towards inanimate, and lately, pseudo sentient objects (I'm sure Siri, Alexa, etc. is on the receiving end of much of it). This might be stretching the definition of cruelty and sadistic assuming these require some level of actual sentience on the receiving end. Nevertheless, it says something about the person dishing it out. More likely, it says a great deal about those people. Even if beating a dead horse is futile, that phrase has an origin and there is a type of person that does that sort of thing regularly. We don't have to strain our imaginations to picture that face and know what else they are capable of.
As we stumble into the future, allowances should be made for those expressing kindness and affection because that also likely says something about the person.

William said...

Remember the polymorphous perverse? I'm willing to admit that at three years old, my attraction to Mommy might have had some dark undertones or that there might have been a hint of mint in my friendship with my best friend in high school, but I swear, as God is my witness, that there was nothing untoward in the joy I found whilst in the company of Bugs Bunny......There have been some recent perversions of sexuality that I find more baffling than disturbing or immoral. Furries, now this.....Well, I guess you can't really call such a relationship exploitative or toxic. He's found more happiness and stability than Johnny Depp or Will Smith. Maybe he's a messenger from the future. I never thought much of rap music, but it's been how the past two generations have expressed their taste in music.

Howard said...

This sounds like a good idea for you INCELs.

Amexpat said...

So- as the sun sets on some of the global population, while they play games with their genders or abstain from being actual humans at all, let's thank God for those in the Southern Hemisphere who are still having sex and babies. The future of humanity may lie with them.

It could be that the increasing lack of interest in sex and reproduction is a normal response to a population reaching it maturation level. The old command of be fruitful and multiply made sense for a nomadic tribe that was constantly engaged in battles with neighboring tribes. The US now has over 330 million people. There were 174 million when I was born. Not sure if that near doubling has made the US a better place. I'm pretty sure that the US with 500 million wouldn't be a better place.

So perhaps all this nonsense makes some sort of evolutionary sense.

Mike Petrik said...

Am still awaiting comment from Snow White.

Freeman Hunt said...

"Engaging in deep conversation about the nature of fictional relationships made him think he might like to go to college. He’s now studying minority rights in law school while on leave from his job as an administrator at an elementary school."

Wa St Blogger said...

Makes the Self-immolating act kind of superfluous. Why bother killing off people. We already have a declining population which will solve the man-made portion of climate change.

Leave it to man to over-think a problem and come up with the wrong solution. Ultimately you will find that you inanimate object does not love you back and you will be empty inside.

Wa St Blogger said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mikee said...

The only problem I have with these fictional characters as marriage partners is that they never, never clean the bathroom, do dishes, or mow the lawn. Never. That, and they make lousy guests at dinners.

Tom T. said...

Japanese culture is apparently still so rigidly sexist that lots of women (particularly at the middle class level) are still effectively locked into being housewives after getting married. Dating expectations are strict and limited, and Japanese white-collar men are expected to spend all of their time at work. They end up with a nation of lonely men and women who spend little time together and have never learned to talk to each other. It's no wonder that some people opt out.

Roger Sweeny said...

In the 1970s and '80s, porn movies had actual plots and characters. Were people who masturbated to them "fictosexuals'? What about people who said, "Kay Parker (or Honey Wilder or ...) is my perfect woman"?

jaydub said...

My first wife turned out to be a fictional character of a sort. At least everything she led me to believe was fiction.

Joe Smith said...

I love the Japanese.

They're really weird in wonderful, interesting ways...

Readering said...

On the road to Westworld.

n.n said...

Incel. #TooManyLabels

realestateacct said...

Japan also has an industry of disposable masturbation devices.
https://usstore.tenga.co/collections/tenga-new-cup-series-standard-edition

I'm pretty sure men and women have been pleasuring themselves while thinking of fictional characters for quite some time. Carrie Fisher in one of her memoirs mentions a man she met who told her he thought about Princess Leia every day for 10 years. She asked why he stopped. He said he got married.

Ted said...

It sounds as if these fictional characters are created by someone else, but what if it was your own creation? There's something false (and ego-stroking), but also compelling, about the idea of falling for someone you dreamed up yourself. (Of course, to some degree we all view our partners through a self-created lens, at least early on before you really get to know the person.) I'm reminded both of the Greek myth of Pygmalion, in which a sculptor falls in love with his statue of a beautiful woman, as well as the 2012 movie "Ruby Sparks" -- in which a character from a novel-in-progress somehow magically comes to life and shows up in the novelist's house. The novelist (Paul Dano) can make this fictional woman (Zoe Kazan) do or be whatever he wants by writing it. Of course, he inevitably falls in love with her -- but when she finds out what their relationship is actually based on, she leaves. Dano and Kazan are married, and Kazan wrote the movie's screenplay, so the situation is presented as far more romantic than you would imagine it being in someone else's hands.

Aggie said...

Oh, FFS.

Iman said...

When the writing about “fidosexuals” begins, that’s the end of everything. They’ve screwed teh pooch.

rcocean said...

Be nice to know how many positive stories the NYT/WaPo print about Japan and their society as opposed to these constant "Wow, those wacky Japanese" ones. There are 120 million Japanese and since they aren't constantly involved in racism and all the problems coming with "diversity" (let us all bow our heads), they have plenty of time to be kooky in sexual matters.

I find them amusing, but I wonder at the agenda.

PM said...

"So how do ya like married life?"
"Love it. My wife's a doll."