Althouse: "Updated Covid Guidelines: A Flow Chart Wrapped in a Riddle Shrouded in a Clusterfuck."

September 16, 2021

"Updated Covid Guidelines: A Flow Chart Wrapped in a Riddle Shrouded in a Clusterfuck."

McSweeney's answers the question "Should you wear a mask?"

30 comments:

Yancey Ward said...: I would post this chart on Twitter, but I like to keep my account open so I can read other feeds. I might post it on Faceplant since I no longer visit any pages there.; 9/16/21, 11:54 AM
Ann Althouse said...: Please comment on the linked material, not on masks in general!; 9/16/21, 12:04 PM
Sebastian said...: Funny stuff.

At the same time, not ha-ha funny: do our overlords know anything, anything at all, about the benefit of masking for vaccinated people?; 9/16/21, 12:06 PM
Jersey Fled said...: Hmmm...

I didn't make it past the first level.; 9/16/21, 12:07 PM
Jersey Fled said...: Maybe if I start at the bottom and work my way up.; 9/16/21, 12:08 PM
tcrosse said...: Magic Eight-Ball says "Ask Kevin"; 9/16/21, 12:21 PM
Yancey Ward said...: Fine- the chart shows how ridiculous the masking thing is. It makes the point by pretty much being true at every single one of those decision points, but in a humorous way to try to avoid the censors.; 9/16/21, 12:22 PM
David Begley said...: I was going to post the chart on Twitter, but I was afraid I might get suspended by the speech police for the word “ clusterfuck.”

Chilled my First Amendment rights.; 9/16/21, 12:24 PM
Howard said...: It's too bad these folks aren't running SpaceX; 9/16/21, 12:37 PM
Enigma said...: Facemasks have become nothing other than a crucifix, as they reveal (1) sincerity or anxiety about infection, (2) begrudging use per requirements -- often worn as an ineffective chin mask or with an uncovered nose, or (3) reveal those who refuse to conform.

This chart beautifully captures the loss of medical value and political credibility. The flow chart slowly becomes absurd and then melts down into chaos. Politicians lost credibility in the early phase, when they said masks had no value and encouraged people to visit Chinese restaurants to fight [Trump and] discrimination. All living politicians and epidemiologists had no experience with mass quarantines or pandemics, so they fell flat on their faces regarding masks. Five times in a row. Larry, Moe, and Curly style.

At this point masks can never regain credibility and will ALWAYS symbolize either sincerity, conformity, or resistance.

Back in the 1500s Japan required that European visitors (e.g., Portuguese sailors) step on wooden images of Jesus to prove they were not Christians. They also boiled 23 Christians alive in a hot spring to suppress the spread of Christianity. Sadly, this chart confirms that human nature is unchanged.; 9/16/21, 12:55 PM
Temujin said...: I'd say it's pretty much up to date. No one has any idea what the 'right' thing is that we're supposed to do anymore. Few people are wearing masks either in Florida (where I just left days ago) or in Michigan (where I've been to 3 cities in the last two days). Outside of airports, of course, where everybody is wearing a mask. But not in the stadiums where sitting alongside 100,000 people does not seem to be a mask standard.

And no one except your Aunt Doris listens to Dr. Fauci any longer. Or Pelosi. Or Biden. Or Trump. Or...well wait- people still listen to Trump. But not Maddow or Mika. Certainly not Schumer. Come to think of it, Republicans are pretty invisible on this, with the exception of Rand and Cotton. That's not new. Republicans are invisible pretty much all the time, every year, since I've been alive.

So honestly, I think this flow chart is pretty funny and almost spot on. With one very large missing part: Blacks and Hispanics are the largest (by percentage) groups that are not getting vaccinated. I guess Mr. Shollenberger didn't want to touch that.

And he didn't even touch illegal immigrants, hanging out by the thousands in Texas, waiting for their shipping instructions. Good God, I think it's time to look for property in Portugal.; 9/16/21, 1:06 PM
gilbar said...: Thanx for posting this flowchart Professor Althouse!
i THOUGHT i'd be safe at my house maskless.... But; i didn't consider Kevin; 9/16/21, 1:09 PM
dbp said...: I've been lampooning McSweeny's headlines for a while now--I have 14 such posts. This one is free from their common, quite-predictable, leftish bias.

Would that they could all be like this!; 9/16/21, 1:32 PM
FWBuff said...: That was both funny and true!; 9/16/21, 1:48 PM
CJinPA said...: Image doesn't appear for me. Did I anger old man McSweeney? (Haven't been there in ages. One of the early humorous websites.); 9/16/21, 2:10 PM
Misinforminimalism said...: The Bee's is better.

https://babylonbee.com/news/do-you-have-to-wear-a-mask-a-handy-flowchart; 9/16/21, 2:48 PM
mikee said...: A good medical flow chart, but not a GREAT medical flowchart.

The COVID Guidelines are just a shrouded Clusterf**k.
The Obamacare Flowchart exceeds any patient's expectations.; 9/16/21, 3:05 PM
reader said...: It’s nice things are so much clearer now than when this slog started. It is all about a curve, right?

Video Flashback April 2020; 9/16/21, 3:35 PM
What's emanating from your penumbra said...: I had no idea about vegans.; 9/16/21, 4:08 PM
Leland said...: "Did you know vegans aren't getting vaccinated?"

I'd watch the News is someone asked Jen Psaki this question. Alas, movie theaters are far more dangerous than just Covid.; 9/16/21, 4:31 PM
Chuck said...: I held off from making this comment, respecting Althouse’s 2nd-comment admonition.

But after reading the subsequent moderated comments, I feel good about asking for the flowchart entitled “Why Not Wear a Mask?”; 9/16/21, 4:32 PM
wild chicken said...: It's almost as if we were in uncharted territory, rather unprecedented, and we're learning new things about the virus ever day, while trying to provide consistent, trustworthy guidances, and that we each have to adjudge the situation based on the totality of the circumstances, and do the very best we can for ourselves, given imperfect knowledge.; 9/16/21, 5:22 PM
mikee said...: Chuck, I have your "Why Not Wear A Mask" right here - a short video, enjoy.

I'm certain the masks made last June in Wuhan province, and on shelves in the US now, are much better.; 9/16/21, 5:23 PM
Lucien said...: Wait . . Did Q Anon rebrand - because I already couldn’t understand what it was. Also, is Jungle Cruise anything like “The African Queen”? (That was a cool movie (“Badges — we don’t got to show you no stinkin’ badges!”)).
If you know that anyone who doesn’t want to wear a mask is using the same one that’s been wadded up in their pocket/purse/cup holder for months, wiping their hands all over it, and wearing it under their chin when it gets too sweaty, does it make you feel anyone is safer?; 9/16/21, 5:52 PM
Barbara said...: Kevin is my male Karen. So there’s that.; 9/16/21, 8:16 PM
BobJustBob said...: mikee:

You don't even need to watch the charming video. Every box of the blue masks says one of two things. Either "Not For medical use" or "Does not prevent the spread of COVID-19 or other corona viruses.

They made it easier for us...; 9/16/21, 11:30 PM
MadisonMan said...: I feel good about asking for the flowchart entitled “Why Not Wear a Mask?”
So go ahead and make one. I think the opposite of "Should you wear a Mask?" is not "Why not wear a Mask", however.; 9/17/21, 7:05 AM
Jamie said...: The flowchart at my recently rebooted church choir is much less byzantine: Do we have to wear masks? --> Take a vote --> Should the vote be yes or no, or should masks be optional, since we're already requiring everyone to swear (or affirm) that they're vaccinated? --> Can't be optional, that's like a "no peeing" section in the pool [as is wearing a mask generally when we're dealing with aerosolized virus, I refrained from pointing out] --> Um... results of the yes/no vote don't matter because even if one person votes to mask, we're going to mask.

I kept myself from leaving because I haven't done anything remotely religiously observant since this mess began and I'm trying to recapture a shadow of the spiritual life I once had. But it was a near thing, and it's one day at a time for me still. Sigh.; 9/17/21, 7:35 AM
gilbar said...: Jamie said...
The flowchart at my recently rebooted church choir is much less byzantine: Do we have to wear masks?

how about, a simpler flow chart?

If (you want to wear masks) {GO THE F*CK HOME! THIS IS A CHOIR!!}; 9/17/21, 9:45 AM
Jamie said...: I suggest googling "singer's mask." See if it reminds you of anything. Like, oh, say, this.

Oh, my people.; 9/17/21, 12:53 PM

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