What I saw was "How Do I Define My Gender if No One Is Watching Me?/Without a public eye, who are we?" by Alex Marzano-Lesnevich (NYT).
April 2, 2021
"Alone in my apartment... I was surprised by how much my gender instead seemed to almost evaporate."
"Where did my own
gender reside, then, if not in sending signals of difference?... With the gender binary all but gone, what
did it mean to be nonbinary? How do I define my gender when I —
accustomed to how visible my gender usually makes me — am no longer
being watched?.... A similarly
liberating shift happened for Tygra Slarii, a 29-year-old Black
performer at a Minneapolis bar, The Saloon. Before the pandemic, Mx.
Slarii came out as a woman and had gender-affirming breast augmentation.... When Minnesota issued shelter-in-place orders, the extended pause gave
Mx. Slarii time to question, and explore the complexity of, gender — and
come out again, this time as nonbinary. 'My body isn’t a tool for
marketing my transition anymore,' Mx. Slarii told me. 'I don’t think cis
people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people,
especially when it comes to transitioning.'
When, during the pandemic, Mx. Slarii pursued a second gender-affirming
surgery, a Brazilian butt lift, it was an entirely different emotional
experience. This time, the surgery was no longer a means of selling a
narrative to be believed and seen; now Mx. Slarii’s body was simply
their own.... Who are we, when no one is
looking? Who are we, without what once both held us back and held us up?"
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101 comments:
The musings of the insane
Woe betide them who does not know themself....
Before the pandemic, Mx. Slarii came out as a woman and had gender-affirming breast augmentation.
Seems like a case for false advertisement.
Rationalizing their behavior is what humans do.
When, during the pandemic, Mx. Slarii pursued a second gender-affirming surgery, a Brazilian butt lift, it was an entirely different emotional experience.
A flu leading to a global pandemic cannot be associated with its geographical origins without being "racist," but a butt lift can?
pro tip: if you have a dick; you're NOT a woman
I usually take a step back from reading articles, and if I see the first person "I" littered throughout, I turn the page.
Of course, an even quicker short cut is seeing a hyphenated name in the byline.
"Who are we, when no one is looking?"
Checks medical references...yep, still a dude.
The NYT is trying to usurp the National Inquirer readership. It appears they already have its contributors.
What crap!
“Cis people, they’re the worst.”
A trans-loon (see Ann's video about a real loon) jumped before it knew what it really was. Maybe should have seen a shrink before having surgery and understood its real feelings. Many years of therapy.
One of the basic tests of character is how you act when no one is watching. If you become a different person, it does not speak well of you.
I'm at the moment calculating the number of smooth cyclic words of length n over an alphabet 1..k and not considering my gender at all.
We have spent decades trying to dissolve gender stereotypes. Little girls should be able to play with construction sets, and a little boy can have a comfort doll. Yet now we're supposed to be all supportive of people embracing the most sexist of stereotypes? Breast augmention and a Brazilian buttlift? You don't need big breasts to be a woman. Most women's butts sag with age. Only the vain need plastic surgery to change the effects of gravity.I struggle with the idea of what transgender folks think it means to "feel like a woman". I feel like me. I like math and science. I played with building sets and was a really good fielder in neighborhood baseball pickup games. I wear a dress when the occasion calls for it and pants most of the rest of the time. I haven't worn makeup in months. I've given birth a couple of times. But I can't say what makes me feel like a woman. I don't know what would change about how I feel about myself if a doctor made me a fake penis.
Which gender is affirmed by a Brazilian butt lift??
If women don't have somebody to nag they're lost. Let's say make requests of. She may go the correct route and reward effort.
Which gender is affirmed by a Brazilian butt lift??
Brazilian
Ah, it's the writer who calls it gender-affirming. You can no longer say, "Hey, I want a tighter ass," and get plastic surgery, apparently. Now you have to justify it. Maybe it's a covid thing.
I need a gender-affirming neck tuck and jaw lift, doc.
The more I hear from and encounter these people the more I am convinced they are mentally ill. I know it is impolite to say so, indeed is a microaggression of some sort, but I just cannot read this and come to any other conclusion.
Why do they share their thoughts and tell their stories so publicly? As propaganda and as a solicitation for affirmation? Perhaps as some sort of therapy?
'I don’t think cis people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people, especially when it comes to transitioning.'
Speaking just for myself (a "cis person") I can say that I've never had any input into a trans person's choices. Not once. Not ever. I can say quite confidently any "input" on my part only exists in a trans person's imagination. I know this because I generally don't care much about other people's choices if they don't infringe on my choices or those that I care about. If you're not hurting, killing, stealing, or otherwise making another person's life miserable, I honestly don't care what you do. I just don't have the time or energy to. And I strongly suspect that my attitude is fairly common in modern times.
In all seriousness, maybe this would be a better path for some people who have this issue -stepping away from the external validation, and looking inward. Maybe more people should embrace the idea of “non-binary,” rather than trans, and just exist, without trying to be some stereotype or another.
"When, during the pandemic, Mx. Slarii pursued a second gender-affirming surgery, a Brazilian butt lift, it was an entirely different emotional experience. This time, the surgery was no longer a means of selling a narrative to be believed and seen; now Mx. Slarii’s body was simply their own.... Who are we, when no one is looking?"
Apparently we are somebody with a great ass!
This is absurd. If you have XX or XY believe me the coroner will know, and correctly identify you as such on his/her report, regardless of their delusions. Doesn't really matter as Climate Change will kill us all in 10 years, so WTF?
How does a biological man know what if feels like to be a woman, and vice versa. What this person is doing is comparing physical attributes and stereotypical behaviors.
"Brazilian butt lift" sounds like a title to a Frank Zappa song.
'My body isn’t a tool for marketing my transition anymore,' Mx. Slarii told me. 'I don’t think cis people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people, especially when it comes to transitioning.'
If you think I care about your butt lift and fake breasts then you are mistaken. Leave me out of your dysfunction and pathology. And No, Biden/Harris cannot coerce me into caring.
Sometime in the future, these surgeries and their enthusiasts will be viewed the way we look at the insanity of seances and table-rapping.
Happy the [wo]man, whose wish and care
A perky backside bounds...
Isn't it a violation of HIIPA to publish a therapy session?
Gender aside, my sci-fi addled brain believes this is the leading edge of our species seeking more ways to redefine/alter ourselves. I mean, how many times during your life have you said "if only I had an extra arm this would be so much easier." Make it so!
Gender is just the beginning. Our species is just the beginning. Imagine cats with opposable thumbs!
Which gender is affirmed by a Brazilian butt lift??
Brazilian
======
Does this make you racist against Brazilians or sexist against impossibly beautiful Brazilian women?
It is so difficult to keep up with the rules…….
"Brazilian butt lift..." Wondering if I can get one of those at United Rentals?
Mmmm... looks like "not."
Nonapod said...
"Brazilian butt lift" sounds like a title to a Frank Zappa song.
Frank would have worked Bondo into the title.
Sounds like someone addicted to porn with sexual compulsive behavior issues.
Butt lifts and large breasts. What's that have to do with feeling like you're a a woman? Sounds more like you want to take selfish look in the mirror at yourself, and flaunt image to others.
That's got nothing to do with being a woman. Just a psychological issue.
So It is confirming what has been obvious to everyone else, non-binary is simply narcissistic nonsense used by attention whores to get noticed.
The Miss Bum-bum contest moved from Brazil to London. The suggested theme song there would be the London Derriere.
I don't care what anyone thinks of my sexuality... but then I get cosmetic surgery.
A flu leading to a global pandemic cannot be associated with its geographical origins without being "racist," but a butt lift can?
Nice catch.
Acceptance isn’t enough there must also be approval.
Does this person realize how their naval gazing weighs on cis people.
Now I have Rockwell stuck in my head.
Who's watching
Tell me who's watching
Who's watching me
I'm just an average man with an average life
I work from 9 to 5, hey hell, I pay the price
All I want is to be left alone, in my average home
But why do I always feel
Like I'm in the Twilight Zone?
I always feel like somebody's watchin' me
And I have no privacy
I always feel like somebody's watchin' me
Tell me is it just a dream?
When I come home at night
I bang the door real tight
People call me on the phone I'm trying to avoid
Or can the people on TV see me
or am I just paranoid?
When I'm in the shower
I'm afraid to wash my hair
Cause I might open my eyes and find someone standing there!
People say I'm crazy, just a little touched
But maybe showers remind me of Psycho too much
That's why...
Hey y'all! Looks like Tygra is Miss Gay Des Moines and Miss Gay Iowa!
What do you see when you turn out the light.
I am Laslo.
Remember a time, decades ago, when The New York Times was a real newspaper, run by old-timers who had started out covering police and fire beats in small towns, and then worked their way up, and ran real stories.
Yeah, good times, good times.
Not just Word Salad.
Thought Salad.
Narcissists are the worst. Everything is about them.
I'm a guy, and the amount of time I spend thinking about my 'gender' is so low, the Hubble telescope can't detect it.
Ah, it's the writer who calls it gender-affirming.
Indeed, they keep using that word "affirming", but I don't think it means what they think it means.
“ 'My body isn’t a tool for marketing my transition anymore,' Mx. Slarii told me. 'I don’t think cis people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people, especially when it comes to transitioning.' ”
I don’t think trans people know how much their narcissistic agonizing both repels and bores everyone else, especially when it comes to self-mutilation.
FIFY.
How many writers and staff does the Old Gray Lady have assigned to the bizzaro sex desk?
I’m thinking many, many more than the Enquirer or Penthouse in its heyday.
Ann, do you think this is a cry for help by the NYT? Or are you just making one on their behalf?
I have no idea what a Brazilian butt lift is but I'm certainly not going to google it.
Definite theme to the blog today.
"Brazilian butt lift" is racist like China Virus or racist like BBC.
if you sport a "Brazilian butt lift" in a mirrorless forest, does it matter?
I met a beautiful "young woman" at a party thrown by one of my friends when I was a young Boeing engineer (ca. 1980) at the wind tunnel. This young woman turned out to be a buddy, Warren Deaz, also from the wind tunnel. He was transitioning to womanhood, and had to live the life of a woman for years before he could undergo any surgery. Living as woman meant having to use the women's bathrooms, which the real women objected to. Boeing warned him about using the women's bathrooms and fired him when he continued to do so.
It would be easy to ignore these insane people if they weren't so busy demanding we normalize their behavior.
here's a Fun Thought Experiment!
There are 2 Sergeants, in the US Army
BOTH think that their breasts are "Too Small", and want enhancement surgery
They both tell their Captain, and ask if the US Army will pay for the enhancement surgery?
The Captain tells "Shelia", that that Is NOT the US Army's problem: Pay for your Own boobs
The Captain tells "Heidi", that the US ARMY Will (OBVIOUSLY) pay for the enhancement surgery
Why the difference? Heidi has a dick
Why do they share their thoughts and tell their stories so publicly? As propaganda and as a solicitation for affirmation?
Shame is no longer a thing.
The Captain tells "Shelia", that that Is NOT the US Army's problem: Pay for your Own boobs
The Captain tells "Heidi", that the US ARMY Will (OBVIOUSLY) pay for the enhancement surgery
Why the difference? Heidi has a dick
Actually the military has provided breast augmentation and other surgeries. It gives military surgeons experience that applies to reconstructive surgeries for soldiers wounded in combat.
“With no-one to exert power over my concern faded. Inexplicable.”
"I don’t think cis people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people"
Hey, Mx., we don't give a damn. Or is it the indifference that weighs down on you?
Now, when you try to coerce us into thinking things that ain't so, or force women to accept men in women's spaces, then we'd like to have some "input."
Seems to be a Mass psychotic event happening in America. Wonder what the cause might be????
"Seems to be a Mass psychotic event happening in America. Wonder what the cause might be????"
Gozer the Traveler. He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!
Without reading any of the other comments... I may never have heard a more out-and-proud explication of narcissism.
The Cliff Notes:
Look at me Look at me Look at me.
Hey, where is everybody?
We are now playing a game of Schrodinger's gender. There are 57 (or am I behind on the whole universe of possible options now?) possible genders that our cat can have but we won't know which it is until we open the box and look.
Your sex resides in your genes.
If you have XX chromosomes you are a woman, and if you have XY chromosomes you're a man.
Blogger Patrick Henry was right! said...
Seems to be a Mass psychotic event happening in America. Wonder what the cause might be????
The cause is internet social media clickbait misleading people into thinking these freakshows are evidence of the culture at large.
You people have already proved you are suspectable to all manner and type of suggestion.
It's lefty QAnon bullshit and you buy it too.
Genderphobia. Gender is sex-correlated attributes (e.g. sexual orientation).
A gender affirming non-binary person? Yea, that makes sense.
Definite theme to the blog today.
Divergence from normal. Yesterday, too, with diversitists (e.g. racists) out and proud. The novel normal.
There's a world where I can go and tell my secrets to
In my room, in my room
In this world I lock out all my worries and my fears
In my room, in my room
Do my dreaming and my scheming
Lie awake and pray
Do my crying and my sighing
Laugh at yesterday
Now it's dark and I'm alone
But I won't be afraid
In my room, in my room
In my room, in my room
In my room, in my room
You know, it's just possible that this person is nuts, and that affirmation is really just enablement.
I think I commented on the self-focused navel gazing tabloid that the NYT has turned into. Pitiful.
"How Do I Define My Gender if No One Is Watching Me?/Without a public eye, who are we?" by Alex Marzano-Lesnevich (NYT). If you cannot do this on your own, by yourself, you're probably not a man or a woman. Good luck with whatever you decide to be when you grow up.
Laslo Spatula said...
What do you see when you turn out the light.
------------------
I can't tell you, but I know it's mine
As a crazy person, though of a different stripe, I deeply believe that everyone should celebrate crazy people and give them money. Thank you.
I feel in many ways as if this is bait, but it is hard not to look at this article and be reminded of Jenner's post-boob surgery magazine bit and the comment about how as woman, now appearance was very important. (I'm trying to avoid pronouns, because I can only honestly use the politically incorrect one.)
That struck me as the strangest comment ever - most older women kind of seize the opportunity to be more themselves, to please themselves, and not other people. You are not exactly trolling for sex partners generally at that age.
The problem with too many of these transgender Queens-For-The-Day is that it is directing their efforts outward at other people, rather than figuring out really how to be themselves. I don't have that much of a problem with it, until they start telling other people how to be themselves. Then I just look at it as proof of an extreme personality disorder. Narcissism is sometimes rather evident.
It strikes me as terribly sad that people are using this ????movement???? as a way to put themselves more in a box. I do believe that there is something of an industry that has grown up which exploits psychological problems for profit.
The sickness runs deep in this one.
Gender is just the beginning. Our species is just the beginning.
Hence the Jewphin.
Things that don’t evaporate when I am alone:
How many fingers I have
My height
My dislike for liver
My eye colour
Gender is just the beginning. Our species is just the beginning.
Sex is the beginning. Gender follows sex.
Our species is just the begging of the end. Maybe, baby, and all her carbon pollutants, are sequestered to power the next civilization. Evolution: forward, backward, round and around.
Eleanor said:
.I struggle with the idea of what transgender folks think it means to "feel like a woman". I feel like me.
This doesn't get mentioned enough in this conversation. There is no inherent "feeling" of being a man or woman, and the failure of psychology to hold its ground on this point alone highlights the failure of the entire field.
Most of those who are "trans" are LARPing their preferred gender with the most superficial stereotypes, and those who normally whine about stereotypes suddenly embrace them.
I was hoping the lesson of COVID isolation was that left alone, you are just you, and "gender," being a social construct, doesn't enter into it, but I guess not.
The Times seems obsessed with deviant gender and sex issues. Are the readers really that interested? Maybe, as is said of contemporary poetry, more people are writing this stuff than reading it.
A lesson for Alex: Don't buy your website URL before you finalize your transition. You may be Alex, but your website is alexandria-marzano-lesnevich.com.
And what is it with "Alexandria" as a first name lately?
You can call yourself "Mx." but only if you change your last name to "Mxyzptlk."
How is "Mx." pronounced anyway?
"Most of those who are "trans" are LARPing their preferred gender with the most superficial stereotypes, and those who normally whine about stereotypes suddenly embrace them."
You don't mean drag queens basically caricature real women do you? Naah1
Mx. Slarii told me. 'I don’t think cis people understand how much their input weighs down on trans people, especially when it comes to transitioning.'
I don't this Mxed up Slarii understands just how little cis people care about transitioning or her/his sexual confusion.
I have no input on this other than...SHUT THE EFF UP about yourself.
Annnd....:
What’s happening
NCAA Women's Basketball
·
LIVE
South Carolina Gamecocks at Stanford Cardinal
Mx. Slarii is a living counterargument to the people saying that "trans" men and women really are the gender they say they are, forever. She "came out" as a woman (presumbably having been "assigned" male at birth), and then "came out" a second time as "nonbinary." Well, which Slarii is correct? Or was the pre-transitioning Slarii, who likely at some early stage did feel comfortable being a boy, correct? Are they all wrong? All right? Honestly, with the best will in the world towards people like Mx. Slarii, I am reminded of a small child outside a toy store: "I want that one! No, that one! No, that one!"
Brazilian butt lift is obviously cultural appropriation.
Even in this day and age, this is some impressive navel-gazing.
Coincidentally, Brazilian Butt Lift is now an official Olympic sport.
(not to be confused with the Mariel Boat Lift)
" If you have XX or XY believe me the coroner will know, and correctly identify you as such on his/her report, regardless of their delusions."
You lost that argument when sex became "gender assigned at birth." Even large medical organizations have replaced "sex" with "gender assigned at birth." I can't say why organizations supposedly ruled by evidence-based medicine would deny the existence of biological sex.
But so far it's just our species, as I don't think anyone has chosen to question the biological reality of male and female chicks, or puppies, or other sexed species.
These people on the far left are fucking insane.
" Even large medical organizations have replaced "sex" with "gender assigned at birth."
--
I just saw a pharma ad (AIDS prevention) that used that phrase.
"Brazilian butt lift..." Wondering if I can get one of those at United Rentals?"
No, but you can get a CAT Front End Loader. I wonder what a Backhoe does?
Since we've been talking grammar here,
Who are we, without what once both held us back and held us up? Whom do we wish to be?
How did that last "whom" get past the "layers and layers of fact-checkers and editors"?
But so far it's just our species, as I don't think anyone has chosen to question the biological reality of male and female chicks, or puppies, or other sexed species.
Yes. Lions, lionesses, and their cubs hold pride parades, playing in gay abandon, to exercise their kills for a carnivorous meal. Hold the veggies, pass the vegans.
Someday the lawyers are gonna figure out they can sue these "doctors" into bankruptcy for the mutilations they've been performing on the mentally ill.
Caligula said...
"I can't say why organizations supposedly ruled by evidence-based medicine would deny the existence of biological sex."
***************
You don't say. Haven't been reading the newspapers lately, have you....
It simply does not matter that there's no real "science" to support that position, but medicine, like all the hard sciences, has been infected with Lysenkoism.
"Yes. Lions, lionesses, and their cubs hold pride parades, playing in gay abandon, to exercise their kills for a carnivorous meal. Hold the veggies, pass the vegans.
************
Yes! Why, just the other day a Gay "Pride" parade of lions passed down our street, some wearing the predictable assless chaps.
"How is "Mx." pronounced anyway?"
mixdup
What these folk need is a good 'ol war, with them parked in trenches under artillery fire. I feel sure it would help them get a sense of perspective.
OK, I had to look it up. A Brazilian butt lift costs @$4000. You take fat from one part of your body and move it to your ass. From March to October my business was shut down. No PPP or unemployment ( took forever). I spent $4000 during that time:food, heat and light, car insurance. What a worthless person he is.
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