I guess the network taste level is you have to say "turd" for "shit." Personally, I think "turd" is a nastier word. "Shit" is crisper, jauntier. "Turd" has that ugly "urd" sound that we find in "murder," "burden," and "absurd." And "turd," unlike "shit," calls attention to the shape of particular lumps of excrement (which makes it the less apt word for what's going on in that tumble-dryer the joke requires us to imagine).
Anyway, the quote comes from Stephen Colbert.
And here's another joke from Colbert last night, the one that supports the NYT headline ("Stephen Colbert Wants to Remind You: Trump Isn’t Normal"):
The president attacking his Justice Department, trusting Putin over his own intelligence community, calling the F.B.I. a bunch of corrupt, deep-state coup plotters is not normal. It is strange. It’s like how Jack in the Box sells tacos for some reason? It may not be illegal, but it certainly violates something sacred.What I see there is Colbert climbing down from the hope that Donald Trump committed treason and assorted other impeachable offenses. Now, what he did is just icky, like turds and those fast food restaurants people like us would never think of patronizing.
Which brings us to the third Colbert joke the NYT selects for quotation:
Speaking of the Russia investigation, Donald Trump would prefer that we not speak of it. In fact, he has tried very hard to make all investigations of him vanish faster than a cheeseburger at bedtime.Again, it's snobbery about fast food. Message to Colbert: Cheeseburgers are America's favorite food. To say that Trump likes cheeseburgers is to say he's — gasp! — normal.
Posts
83 comments:
This is what passes for comedy these days? And it's not even funny.
Makes one long for the days of Johnny Carson and Carnak.
When does Colbert get new material?
It's like a comedian's version of Glengarry Glen Ross:
Williamson : As you heard, end of the month, top comedian on late night gets the Eldorado. Next man down gets the...
Shelley Levene : What about the good jokes?
Williamson : The jokes I've given you.
Shelley Levene : But these jokes are shit. They're old... I've seen them 100 times.
Williamson : Well, the jokes are assigned randomly.
Shelley Levene : What about the new jokes, huh? The new jokes, the Glengarry jokes.
Williamson : I've got them. I'm going to hang onto them. And they'll be assigned to closers, based on the funny.
That's an old normal, Althouse. Progressivism is about engineering the NEW normal.
Colbert gives his audience exactly what they want ... their nightly dose of Trump hate.
Colbert is the perfect representative of thr "deep", "deep" thoughts of the entire far left/Left/dems/LLR's/NeverTrumpers, all of which are utterly interchangeable at this point.
The Mueller report is coming out next week most likely and it will pop the balloon that Colbert and the other haters are counting on.
It will be interesting to see the reaction.
I like the idea that Colbert's audience is so depraved that two years of tumbling in feces would leave them with a nausea that could be described as "mild".
Trump is the Punch in their collective turd-bowl
I’d.hate to think that I’m turning into “that’s not funny,” but where are the jokes? I went back to read them again. Some (Inga?) explain how any of that is funny.
Sad.
Also hate typing on iPad!
Colbert is only funny if you're brain-dead, like most of the far left.
It’s like how Jack in the Box sells tacos for some reason?
Duh. They sell them because the are delicious and addicting!
Impropriety is the soul of wit. Being PC is by definition, not being improper. And PC has expanded to cover most every aspect of life. I guess that leaves toilet humor.
Since laughter's not on the menu, is there some other reason to tune into that show?
@ Bill
Especially at 2 am after 8 beers.
The president attacking his Justice Department, trusting Putin over his own intelligence community, calling the F.B.I. a bunch of corrupt, deep-state coup plotters is not normal. It is strange. It’s like how Jack in the Box sells tacos for some reason? It may not be illegal, but it certainly violates something sacred.
Well, it seems as if that’s all backward. What’s not normal is the DOJ plotting a coup, and the FBI leadership has been shown to be a bunch of corrupt partisans. Trump’s reaction seems perfectly reasonable.
Let's look at The Real Outrage
Colbert was born in 1964, which means that Jack In The Box had been selling tacos for THIRTEEN YEARS Before he was born. Jack in the Box is from San Diego.
If Colbert was not an idiot, he'd know that Southern California (especially San Diego) is the home of fusion food. Heck, it is where San Diego Burritos* come from. The idea of them selling tacos and burgers is the idea that made California Great (back when it was).
San Diego Burritos* often inaccurately called California Burritos. Carne asada, French Fries & Pico de gallo
I consider myself lucky that I don't have any chance of tuning in to the Colbert show, as I don't have cable or even a television hooked up to the airwaves. I get enough feel for the utter stupidity of Colbert from what I read or an occasional short video.
If you were spinning in a tumble-dryer for two years I'd assume the turd filling it would be your own.
When I was a teenager we used to say, I don’t care if a joke’s funny so long as it’s dirty. That seems to be Coal Bear’s approach to humor.
We were kidding, by the way.
The Poweline article that Dr K linked to:
CNN joins the chorus of news outlets predicting that Bob Mueller will wind up his investigation imminently:
Attorney General Bill Barr is preparing to announce as early as next week the completion of special counsel Robert Mueller’s Russia investigation, with plans for Barr to submit to Congress soon after a summary of Mueller’s confidential report, according to people familiar with the plans.
The preparations are the clearest indication yet that Mueller is nearly done with his almost two-year investigation.
I assume these reports are more or less accurate. CNN tries to save face by going on at length about the various investigations that will be continued by other federal prosecutors, but there is no disguising the real point: Mueller’s investigation has fizzled out.
Mueller’s central conclusion–the only one that most people care about–must be that there is no evidence that the Trump campaign colluded with Russians to influence the 2016 presidential race, and much evidence to the contrary. Mueller may try to blur the obvious with harsh words about some of President Trump’s associates, but he can’t change the fact that he looked high and low for evidence of collusion, and couldn’t find any.
I think most observers underestimate the impact that the disappointing–to Democrats–end of Mueller’s investigation will have. Polls indicate that a shocking number of Democrats, and a considerable number of independents, actually believe that Trump-Russia collusion occurred. When that implausible theory is dispelled once and for all, there will be a reaction. Trump will be triumphant (likely too much so). There will be a counter-attack, which will focus on the real scandal: meddling in the 2016 election by the FBI and the CIA, and their attempt after the fact to disable the Trump presidency. The amazingly corrupt and incompetent Androids ew McCabe–was this guy really the Deputy Director of the FBI?–is helping in that regard.
I think the collapse of Mueller’s investigation and the lifting of the collusion cloud over Donald Trump’s presidency will change the political landscape. The Democrats will be put on the defensive, but that isn’t all. Trump hasn’t gotten anywhere near enough credit for his administration’s successes. There are several reasons for that: press hostility and his own unforced errors obviously contribute. But I think the collusion cloud is also part of the story, and the ignominious end of Fusion GPS’s hoax will lead some voters, at least, to give Trump and his team the credit they deserve.
"Tank said...
Especially at 2 am after 8 beers."
No kidding. We would order dozens...Breakfast Jacks too.
Very little comedy on TV is actually funny if you just read it. It's like watching a sitcom without the laugh track -- it's embarrassing to think you ever got carried along by such obvious manipulation.
Turd, as a word, is funnier than shit. It’s even funnier if you spell it with an E.
Everybody’s heard bout theTerd
Terd Terd Terd, Terd is the word
The greatest expression of "urd" in the rock pantheon is in Bob Dylan's "Hurricane":
Arthur Dexter Bradley said, "I'm really not sure."
Cops said, "A poor boy like you could use a break
We got you for the motel job and we're talkin' to your friend Bello
Now you don't wanta have to go back to jail, be a nice fellow
You'll be doin' society a favor
That sonofabitch is brave and gettin' braver
We want to put his ass in stir
We want to pin this triple murder on him
He ain't no Gentleman Jim."
Seeing as the atty general in the last administration was in the presidents back pocket, they focused more on going after some filmmaker and a fox reporter then either al queda or North Korea, but camelbert was a court jester
Colbert has never been more than a week sister of John Stewart. TDS is as enabling as compassion fatigue
Just about everything Jack-in-the-Box makes is pretty tasty, including the regular tacos, which are themselves still exactly the same (same seasoning,same orange grease,same mystery meat, same paper sleeve open at one end...) as the one my dad bought me at a newly opened JB in Houston, circa 1964. We took all our (envious) friends from Arkansas there.
I can heartily recommend all the breakfast items currently offered.
Lets see. DoJ/FBI illegally wiretap Trump using a Hillary supplied Dossier, then fail to tell him about it when he becomes President. Then they leak to the media to injure him, all the while pretending to be loyal subordinates. After that, they end up discussing whether to go the cabinet members and invoke the 25th amendment. And of course, all three of them McCabe, Comey, and Brennan have been trashing Trump 24/7 in books and on TV.
Yeah, why wouldn't Trump trust them?
And there's been ZERO proof Trump is "Putin's Cock-holster" and if asked Colbert what proof he had, he couldn't provide any.
I've never seen a POTUS who's been so constantly LIED about. Its astounding.
Some fast food is OK. French fries, shakes, some hamburgers. Burger King is OK, once you scrape off all the goop they put on it. KFC is the same. Once you take off the skin, its OK.
The problem is, you can spend a few $$ more and get much better food at a real restaurant.
Every time I heard Taco Bell's "Run for the Border" - I thought "Run for the bathroom".
Fast Food places like Jack in the Box have been selling diverse food for ever. Tacos, burritos, some sort of Teriyaki quasi-Asian rice/beef/chicken bowls, etc.
Late Night TV that is an arm to the democratic party - an AD for the democratic party, and the democratic party lies and talking points - IS STRANGE.
Where is the FCC?
Who put the turd in Saturday?
I can't listen to Late Night shows because the frontmen are just pandering to the audience and their joint antipathy towards Trump.
It's not comedy, it's consensus-seeking.
"Late Night TV that is an arm to the democratic party - and AD for the democratic party and the democratic party lies - IS STRANGE.
wHERE IS THE FCC?"
Exactly right. And lefties yapped about Citizens United.
"In the case, the conservative non-profit organization Citizens United sought to air a film critical of Hillary Clinton and to advertise the film during television broadcasts shortly before the 2008 Democratic primary election in which Clinton was running for U.S. President." (Wiki)
The problem is, you can spend a few $$ more and get much better food at a real restaurant.
At 2 in the morning? While Plastered?
At 9 in the morning? On your way to the beach?
At 3 in the afternoon? On your way home?
Has Colbert made any jokes about the Jussie hoax? Of course not. He was one of the fools who swallowed an obviously ridiculous story hook, line and sinker because it made MAGA people look bad. But - That's Not Funny! Let's just forget about that and trot out variations of the same "Orange Man Bad" jokes we've been telling since 2016.
It isn't comedy - IT IS ADVERTISING FOR THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY.
Without question, Burger King has the best fast-food soft serve ice cream.
It's illegal to criticize corrupt Hillary and her rapist husband. You'll get Seth Riched.
Today's NYT Crossword (***Spoiler Alert***)
16D Disgusting Sort
T _ _ D
I put it in, but it is such an unpleasant word, I took it out again.
Stephen Colbert walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" and Colbert responds, "I have a mildly nauseous feeling", and the bartender says "A nice Shirley Temple with an umbrella might calm your stomach" and Colbert answers "No, I need social reassurance because this is a psychodramatic condition - would you please bray some laughter at me and display your donkey teeth?"
And the bartender says "No."
F.B.I. a bunch of corrupt, deep-state coup plotters is not normal
See, you're supposed to believe it's ridiculous to think that people in the FBI (and elsewhere at the DOJ) acted like a Deep State and plotted ways to remove Trump...despite the fact that WE KNOW THAT HAPPENED. McCabe is bragging about it--he thinks it's some mark in his favor! You can interpret the known facts in some different, ridiculous way if you want ("oh they were doing what they thought was best for the country, they acted as a deep state to protect us all," whatever) but you can't ignore that those facts, objective reality itself, exists!
As much as the Left likes to toss around the concept of "gaslighting" as some fear they sure do seem to live it as an ethos, huh? We know Clapper and Comey leaked and set stories up. We know Strzok & Ohr and others used their positions and government resources to pursue partisan goals. None of those facts are in dispute! But by assertion people like Colbert intend to argue that they simply don't exist. It's really remarkable.
I'm revolted by the Britannic press using the term "poo" rather than "poopy doo".
And here's another joke from Colbert last night...
Shouldn't joke be in quotes?
Makes one long for the days of Johnny Carson and Carnak.
Johnny was the best. Apolitical and funny.
Henry at 7:34: Well done, sir.
"That is the level of joke told on a network late-night talk show and selected by the NYT for its "Best of Late Night" summary.
Sounds like just the thing for people who enjoy Kathy Griffin shows.
"calling the F.B.I. a bunch of corrupt, deep-state coup plotters is not normal. It is strange"
But true . . .
Anyway, neither the language nor the level of analysis are unusual: in my experience, two minutes into any political conversation that even tangentially includes Trump, progs start yelling and cursing.
"Everybody’s heard bout theTerd
Terd Terd Terd, Terd is the word"
In Ireland, he was known as Richard the Terd.
I would have thought that there might be some comic potential in not just the Smollett thing, but also also the Virginia fiasco and that Covington debacle. Well, that's why I'm not a rich and successful late night comedian......Colbert has the scrubbed, clean cut look of someone who attended a Catholic HS. I don't watch his show, but my guess is that his immediate reaction would have been to mock the Covington kids and venerate the tribal elder. I suppose now that all the background info has come to light, he has decided that mum's the word when commenting on the incident. He's probably still willing to make jokes about Kavanaugh though.......For all its absurdity I don't think it's a cause for comedy that such a man as Colbert would presume the guilt of Sandmann and the innocence of Phillips. What are he dynamics that cause Colbert to have such a low opinion of people with backgrounds similar to Colbert..
"Polls indicate that a shocking number of Democrats, and a considerable number of independents, actually believe that Trump-Russia collusion occurred."
I know man Democrats in real life. You'd be amazed at how politically stupid they are. They believe everything they see on TV and in the New York Times and parrot "the party line". When you point out that they were saying the exact opposite last year or 5 years ago, they look at you with a blank stare and change the subject. Mind-number robots.
Right now, they're all worked up about Climate Change and every freak and extreme weather event is caused by it. And if we don't DO SOMETHING - its the end of the world.
Trump should refer to Colbert as "Not Funny Phony Catholic Stephen Colbert."
And whenever he pronounces his name, he should go with COL-BERT.
"I just want to remind you that that mildly nauseous feeling you have is because for the last two years, Donald Trump has been spinning you in a tumble-dryer full of turd."
If you replace "nauseous" with "aroused" you get a better understanding of his audience.
I am Laslo.
Trump is much funnier than Colbert. That hurts Colbert.
Blogger Curious George said...
"Tank said...
Especially at 2 am after 8 beers."
No kidding. We would order dozens...Breakfast Jacks too.
-----
We'd all pile into Joe Kopchic's Karman Ghia and head to Tijuana for tacos.
Colbert is Poot's poodle.
Johnny Carson had some very real psychological issues. He was terrific.
Steven Colbert has some very real psychological issues. He is pathetic.
Stephen Colbert is a steaming pile of self-aggrandizement.
He stopped being funny when he decided we should give a turd about his politics.
Shut up and dance monkey.
Colbert et all are like the guy who keeps going on about how awful the girlfriend who dumped him was.
For a week or two, you agree with him for emotional support.
After a month, you try to keep from rolling your eyes as he repeats this litany of her awfulness.
After six months, you’re trying to think of him how he was, before he got so fucking pathetic.
After a year, you’re asking yourself: was he always this big of a pussy, and I just didn’t notice before?
After two years you’d rather get a hand-job from a deaf-mute transsexual than listen to him anymore, because AT LEAST THE DEAF-MUTE TRANSSEXUAL DOESN’T FUCKING TALK.
Plus: hand-job.
I am Laslo.
If I'm Colbert, I'm praying that Trump gets re-elected. His show was slowly fading in the ratings before Trump. Hard to see how that trend isn't reinstated once Colbert returns to being judged on his comedic talents.
Blogger Bill, Republic of Texas said...
"It’s like how Jack in the Box sells tacos for some reason?
Duh. They sell them because the are delicious and addicting!"
I've been eating Jack's mystery meat tacos (and breakfast sandwich) since the '60s. It's the only items I eat from there. Not often, but when I have that craving, or as a special treat. Two for 99 cents...a real treat when they're three for 99 cents. But, I'm a born and raised, and still surviving, southern California boy. So, what do I know?
Breakfast Jack...
Blogger gilbar said...
"The problem is, you can spend a few $$ more and get much better food at a real restaurant."
"At 2 in the morning? While Plastered?
At 9 in the morning? On your way to the beach?
At 3 in the afternoon? On your way home? "
Well said.
I’ve heard that Trump Tower has an excellent burrito bowl
@Mc
Trump is funnier than Colbert.
I've been eating Jack's mystery meat tacos
They're actually mostly soy, at least since the late 80's when I worked at Jack's. They're not vegetarian or vegan though.
Colbert has always been a nasty little shit. Back in the day, I would sometimes watch Jon Stewart's Daily Show even though I often disagree with his politics, because he had some wit and a touch of irony and even sometimes made me think.
Colbert was unwatchable, he was just nasty; one might say he confirmed and strengthened both sides' bad opinion of what is wrong with the other guys.
Then CBS hired him for the late night slot and he doubled down, which says a lot about CBS, too.
And, sorry, NYT, but "I just want to remind you that that mildly nauseous feeling you have is because for the last two years, Donald Trump has been spinning you in a tumble-dryer full of turd" is just NOT funny. It might express your feelings and make you feel validated, but it is not funny.
The worst thing you can say to a comedian is that his jokes don't make you laugh. What does the comedian do when that happens? He resorts to swears, cuss words, and thoughts that provoke disgust or repulsion.
Stephen Colbert seems to have a fixation with President Trump.
It’s unhealthy and it’s unseemly. Let it go, Stephen; let it go.
The vaguely uneasy feeling a lot of the Tuck Frump folks have comes from being worried that their rice bowl is going to get kicked over and they’ll actually have to go to work.
You owe me a new keyboard, Laslo.
I spit coffee all over this one.
"That is the level of joke told on a network late-night talk show and selected by the NYT for its "Best of Late Night" summary." If that's the best they can do, fire the whole staff, and the people who hired them.
Lazlo nailed it.
If you are in the dryer being spun, you put yourself there. You chose it.
I know man Democrats in real life. You'd be amazed at how politically stupid they are.
Ronaldus Maximus
“It isn't so much that liberals are ignorant. It's just that they know so many things that aren't so.”
If you want to stop being spun, stop watching Colbert for starters.
A little secret: when the media chooses their prime demographic, they're not looking for wealth or even income. They're specifically looking for people who can be moved to spend money on advertisers. Their viewers are being told that the programs are sophisticated, but they're really designed for rubes.
The audience is Colbert's turd holster.
...Donald Trump has been spinning you in a tumble-dryer full of turd.
If the tumble-dryer is full of turd, and you're in the tumble-dryer, guess what?
You're a turd.
Could it be that with Barr as AG, Mueller and team realizes what he thought was leash on Trump is really noose on his neck?
Isn't Stephen Colbert Hillary's cock holster?
I want Lara Logan for the late night slot.
If that came to pass I might watch it.
My wife may complain though.
Love the tacos and breakfast Jacks, Del Taco and Naugles was also wonderful for those fast food feasts at those special moments. My heart (and husband) belong to Taco Bell after working for their Corporate office for many years. That office knew how to celebrate! Colbert is a fool and needs a new gig.
Post a Comment