July 19, 2018

"Some people throw the dog in the car and have him turned into a eunuch because they don’t care. But there’s a certain segment of pet owners that do care..."

"... and that’s where Neuticles come in. And it’s not only canines and felines. We’ve done an elephant, we’ve done prairie dogs. I Neuticled a monkey in Pocahontas, Ark., and a colony of rats for the University of Louisiana."

Said Gregg A. Miller, inventor of Neuticles, quoted in "The Secret Price of Pets/The care and feeding of America’s 'fur babies' has grown increasingly baroque" (NYT).

That's from a couple weeks ago. I ran across it today because I was searching (after reading that New Yorker article) for more info about whether CBD products have any serious therapeutic value. So, there's also this:
Dogs and cats are indulging in cannabis as well, and not just by getting into their owners’ weed brownies. 
Ugh! I don't find that funny at all. Chocolate is toxic to cats and dogs. But let's keep going:
Start-up companies are marketing CBD, or cannabidiol (a non-psychoactive compound in cannabis), in the form of pet treats, sprays, even lip balms that provide relief, they promise, from ailments including anxiety and cancer.

“There are a hundred claims for what it does,” said Lynn Hirshfield, whose Los Angeles-based business Leafy Dog makes peanut butter and grain-free CBD pet treats. “Can I send you some biscuits for Miles?”
The stupidity hurts. For one thing... lip balm? Do dogs and cats even have lips?

50 comments:

tcrosse said...

My cat has pussy lips.

EDH said...

What are dog lips called?

In dogs, the lower lip is simply the lower lip, but the upper lips are called “flews.” The flews vary in length from breed to breed. Hound-type dogs, and other heavy-muzzled, big-drooling breeds — Bulldogs and Mastiffs among them — have long, low-hanging flews draped over their upper jawline. Along with voluminous facial hair in other dog breeds, the flews can completely obscure a dog’s lower lip.

Nonapod said...

Why must people force their weird neurosese on their pets?

Mary Beth said...

This isn't as bad as the people who force their carnivorous pets to be vegans.

CJinPA said...

Do dogs and cats don't even have lips?

Pepe le Pew was planting his unwanted advances on the lips of many cats.

Roughcoat said...

I'm thinking of getting a CBD product of some sort to calm my border collies during thunderstorms. Border collies were bred to have especially acute hearing so they can hear and respond to spoken or whistled commands over significant distances. Consequently their ears are very sensitive to loud noises, which can inflict physical pain on them. Thunder can be painful to them hence terrifying as well. A calming agent will help them deal with the terror if not the pain. It's a very practical matter. Also I don't want them to suffer because, you know, I love them.

Sal said...

Haha, remember when boys from Deplorable Country would hang a pair off the tow hitch of their pickup? Total chick magnet.

Roughcoat said...

Also we feed our dogs a raw diet. Raw chicken, raw ground beef, vegetables, yogurt, etc. No grains. It' healthier and better for them. Few health problems and lower health care costs are the result.

JPS said...

Roughcoat,

Ever hear of / consider The Thundershirt? It worked surprisingly well for our late great mutt. He was getting more neurotic with age, more insistent on being actively reassured throughout a storm during the middle of the night. I laughed at this product but we were quickly won over. It worked better than Benadryl, for him anyway.

Teller said...

Back in the day, we never thought to give our dogs a tranq for t-storms and fireworks. We'd just pick them up at the pound the next day.

Bob Boyd said...

They say most of the used Neuticles on Craigslist are stolen.

Roughcoat said...

JPS:

Thanks for your note. Yes, we use thundershirts, but with only mixed success. We'll keep using them, but I'd like to find some mild calming agent.

Fascinating animals. They're fearless when herding big animals, even cattle. I'm sure they'd try to herd a group of rhinos if you told them to. But thunder makes them literally tremble with fear.

walter said...

Dog Balls Matter!

gspencer said...

Gary Larson nails it,

http://pictandpicture.org/far-side-cartoon-dog-going-to-get-tutored/

Bob Boyd said...

Remember Clackers?

Michelle Dulak Thomson said...

EDH, Thanks for that; I've never been exactly sure what "flews" were, only that they seemed to be associated with hound-type dogs.

Mary Beth, you are beyond right. Vegan cat food is an abomination. (Vegan dog food, not quite so much, as they're omnivores. Still, cruel and unusual punishment, at minimum.) If you don't want to share your precious living space with (ugh) a carnivore, then for heaven's sake don't get one. I used to walk into Whole Foods, see that stuff, and shiver. Was it made by Seventh Generation, they of the post-consumer-recycled toilet paper? I rather think it was.

Re: comforting animals in thunderstorms: Don't know about that, but a couple nights ago, we had a blackout (a brownout, really -- my bedside lamp was the only thing affected), and I was headed upstairs to find out the actual time when our alarm went off. I have never seen any cat move as fast as Charlie did then. A few minutes later, it was as though nothing had happened.

I have heard good reports of the Thundershirt, though. A nutty idea that actually worked?

Fernandistein said...

I'm thinking of getting a CBD product of some sort to calm my border collies during thunderstorms.

On the 4th we had a big fireworks display down the street - also some good t-storms recently - and the dog that looks like your avatar was at the window growling and trying to get out to attack the source of the noise. After 10 minutes or so he calmed down and ignored it all. The other dog cowered and shivered...

Michelle Dulak Thomson said...

Oh, Ann, almost forgot: Of course cats have lips. They're just very skinny. Cf. third verse of "What's New, Pussycat?"

Bob Boyd said...

"lip balm? Do dogs and cats don't have lips?"

You heard the expression, "Crankier'n a cat with a cold sore?"

traditionalguy said...

MARKETING to silly people who practice Munchausin by proxy on dogs. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

Bob Boyd said...

What's the matter Buma-Dean? You been crankier'n a cat with a cold sore all mornin'.

Oh, some asshole swiped those wooden nuts I gave Sparky for his birthday.

Probably some meth head. I'd check the pawn shops. They might turn up.

Bastards came right in yard, bold as brass. Wish I'd a caught 'em. They'd be the ones sportin' an empty ball sack.

Poor Sparky. He was proud a them new nuts, I could tell.

MikeD said...

Last comment, Traditional Guy, is the only truly factual statement in this thread!

Paco Wové said...

An eunuch.

Dickin'Bimbos@Home said...

Kitty and I use the same lip gloss. what? you gotta problem with that?

Bill, Republic of Texas said...


http://pictandpicture.org/far-side-cartoon-dog-going-to-get-tutored


Ask Lena Dunham. She she's to be into French kissing animals. I guess that's an improvement on her molesting her sister.

Roughcoat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Roughcoat said...

Fernandistein:

The avatar is a pic of my older border collie, a champion sheepherder but terrified of T-storms. Our other BC, the youngster, gets mad at the thunder and barks at it. Reminds me of Shirley Temple when she'd got miffed, shaking her finger and saying in that voice of hers: "You go away, Mr. Thunder, you're very, very noisy and I'm ever so cross with you!"

Carter Wood said...

No, "a eunuch." Eunuch does not begin with a vowel sound, which requires the "an" to prevent the two words from sliding into one. (I forget the technical term.) https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/591/01/

The Cracker Emcee Rampant said...

It's not the pampering of pets that is appalling. I love our dachshund like kinfolk. Perhaps more. It's the pampering of pets in lieu of raising children, that carries the whiff of decline and decadence.

Yancey Ward said...

Do pussies have lips? Chuck, do you have lips?

rhhardin said...

Lips are to keep your mouth from unraveling.

Ann Althouse said...

The weird thing about dog/cat lips is that the low lip is liplike but the upper lip seems not to deserve to be called a lip, hence the word “flews.” How could you put lip balm on flews? But who would even think a dog/cat needed lip balm? So nutty. So neuticlesy.

Tim said...

So cannabis cures cancer now? Wonder why Bob Marley is longer with us.

Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...

what about "Neuvaries"? Are they a thing? yet?

Michael K said...


Blogger Ann Althouse said...
The weird thing about dog/cat lips is that the low lip is liplike but the upper lip seems not to deserve to be called a lip


My basset hound, when he was a puppy, got an infection sort of like impetigo on his lower lips.

After he was treated and for the rest of his life, those spots were pigmented blacl

Bob Boyd said...

Dog spit is a natural lip balm.

Darkisland said...

I have read that marijuana is poisonous to dogs. If that is true, why isn't CBD.

Don't forget, dogs are people too!

John Henry

Bob Boyd said...

A set of chihuahua Neuticles actually costs a little more than Neuticles sized for a mastiff.

Glad you asked. Because chihuahua Neuticles come in a set of three in case you drop one and can't find it.

Temujin said...

You apparently never read "Dogs of Babel". https://www.amazon.com/Dogs-Babel-Novel-Carolyn-Parkhurst-ebook/dp/B002DJ9IS6/ref=dp_kinw_strp_1 (Order it through Althouse's portal).

LordSomber said...

What happened to just using old fashioned catnip?

n.n said...

Are eunuchs a symptom of cbd madness?

DavidD said...

Fur babies?

It's a pet, not a child.

CStanley said...

The thundershirt isn't nutty- light compression is calming to animals and humans. For kids with autism and anxiety disorders there are weighted blankets and vests. Temple Grandin realized that this calmed her and advocated for increased use of compression in handling cattle to reduce stress (vets and ranchers often use chutes to restrain animals but I believe she suggested some changes to the equipment.)

Some dogs respond better than others to the thundershirt but it's definitely worth a try and can work well in conjunction with other anxiolytics. Some good mild neutraceutical calming agents include L-theanine and colostrum, and a proprietary milk protein product called Zylkene. (I'm a vet but have no financial interest in these.) First two need to be given daily so not great for situations like thunderstorm phobias. Zylkene can also be given daily at a low dose but is useful because higher doses are safe and can help situational anxiety.

Also useful are pheromones. For dogs the product with the most research behind it is Adaptil, which comes in various forms- spray, diffusers, and collars.

Jay Elink said...

Tim said...
So cannabis cures cancer now? Wonder why Bob Marley is longer with us.

***************

He was so stoned when he died, that he didn't know he had. And still doesn't.

Roughcoat said...

CStanley --

Great info, many thanks. I'm going to follow up on your suggestions. I don't think the thundershirt is at all nutty, it does work albeit not consistently. Temple Grandin has done good work in this field and she is correct that light compression has a universally calming effect. As mentioned, I will continue to use the thundershirt for my BCs, but I'll also try out the calming agents you recommended.

Roughcoat said...

Can zyklene be given only as needed (i.e., during a T-storm)? I don't want to give my dog daily meds for calming -- they are working dogs, and need to be constantly capable of vigorous action, e.g. to herd sheep when called upon to do so.

cyrus83 said...

Wegmans has a slogan for this type of product, "food you feel good about." Whether the food is actually any better is subordinate to how it makes the shopper feel. And they are very happy to help their customers feel good about themselves by buying pricier boutique versions of things.

Ann Althouse said...

Re carnip

We have a big patch of catnip in our front yard, and it’s been there for nearly a decade. Why haven’t the cats of the neighborhood discovered it? Our front yard should be their hangout.

Rick Turley said...

Ann Althouse said...

"We have a big patch of catnip in our front yard, and it’s been there for nearly a decade. Why haven’t the cats of the neighborhood discovered it?"

I suspect you have one of its Nepeta genus relatives, ie a "catmint" versus "catnip." True catnip is not very ornamental and weedy in appearance as it matures. If the plants have large, ornamental flowers it's likely not catnip.

https://www.thespruce.com/catmint-plants-fo-ground-covering-2132221

CStanley said...

Can zyklene be given only as needed (i.e., during a T-storm)

Yes.