June 26, 2016


"Is there anything I can do to train my body to need less sleep?"

No. You might think so, but that's only because you're not thinking well when you're sleep deprived. "Multiple studies have shown that people don’t functionally adapt to less sleep than their bodies need."
Extended vacations are the best times to assess how much sleep you truly need. Once you catch up on lost sleep and are not sleep deprived, the amount you end up sleeping is a good measure how much you need every night. You can ask yourself the questions, “Do you feel that your brain is much sharper, your temper is better, you’re paying attention more effectively? If those answers are yes, than definitely get the sleep,” said Dr. Veasey, who realized -- to her chagrin -- that she needs nine hours of sleep a night to function effectively.
Unaddressed subject: Are you oversleeping because you believe you should get at least 7 or 8 hours? If, on that "extended vacation," you're up after 6 or 5 hours, can you credit yourself with only needing that much? What if it's only 4 (as it is, we're told, with Donald Trump)? At what point can you say, I'm not an insomniac, I just happen to have a body that only needs that much?


Laslo Spatula said...


Sometimes I get so overwhelmed by the Sadness in the World that I feel like I just want to sleep for days and days.

My therapist says this is Depression but I don't want to take any pills, they make you gain weight. I don't want to get fat, that would just make me more depressed.

And no one likes a fat WebCam Girl. Well, I guess some do, maybe, but those kind of guys are creepy losers who don't feel like so much a loser when they look at a sad naked fat girl. Want to see my bra?

When I am asleep the World cannot touch me, but then I get afraid that I will die in my sleep and never even know it. Which makes me scared to sleep. Would any of you notice if I died? Would any of you care? Should I take off my skirt?

And what if I DID get fat? Would you all stop watching, even though the feelings I share are still the same? Or would I change, and just start complaining about being fat?

I hate it when fat people complain about being fat. I just want to say: "Stop being fat, then." My mother always complains about being fat, I think it's her anti-depressants. Should I bend over and touch my toes?

Maybe I'll just become an alcoholic like my grandmother. She's drunk all the time, but she's thin. And she says the funniest things sometimes; it's just hard when she falls and breaks something again. I just painted my toenails blue, see? Do you like the color? I like the color: it makes me think of the ocean, and then I picture that we are all just little fish, swimming in the ocean. I don't think fish get depressed. I hope not.

And meanwhile, did anyone read the poem I wrote? Anyone?


I am Laslo.

coupe said...

When I was overseas I always kept my watch on Tulsa Time. It was to synchronize my circadian rhythms.

The technique most of us used, was to NOT go to bed after we got there (we would usually land in the morning after flying all night).

By the time you did go to bed you slept like a baby for 10 hours. and presto, you were on the local Sun time.

ellamentary said...

Thought this thread could be a Trump-free zone--- those are few and far between around these parts now days--- but, not, you just had to throw in an aside mentioning his name. *G* And of course, I just had to pick up on that and comment. *G* I know, I'm part of the problem.

Achilles said...

Sleep deprivation is as much a skill as pain tolerance is a skill. We just did it when we had to.

And coupe's comment on dealing with jetlag is the method I used. Most used the ambien pills they gave us.

mikee said...

As a fat person with sleep apnea, sleeping just tires me out.

David said...

I only need 6-7 at night. But then another 5 during the day.

Laslo Spatula said...


I get a lot of requests from people wanting to buy my panties. A LOT of requests. Some want a specific pair -- the little pink ones with tiny white hearts seem to be a particular favorite -- while others would just be happy for any pair I've worn.

I don't think I'm ready to go there, people.

In fact, last night while I was sleeping I dreamed that I sold my panties online and the stranger who bought them then wore them while stalking me. No matter how fast I ran he was right behind me, naked except for my underwear. Then I realized that I wasn't wearing any panties, and there were snakes on the ground around my bare feet.

I could probably ask my Therapist about this, but I don't tell him anything about my WebCam Life: he'd just say it means I have a problem with craving people's acceptance. He says that a lot. Do you want to see my bra?

I don't want to think about what a man would do with my panties. I mean, I have a general idea, but I don't really want to know. One guy wrote me and said he only wanted them for a day, and that then he'd send them back. Ewww.

So, sorry: I'm not selling my panties.

Shall I bend over now?

And meanwhile, did anyone read the poem I wrote? Anyone?


I am Laslo.

Sydney said...

I believe you are correct about the varying amount of sleep needed. Some people really only need 4 or 5 hours, but they worry they aren't sleeping enough because they've been told by popular culture that everyone needs 8 hours of sleep a night. I always ask my patients who complain about insomnia if they feel tired. If they don't, then there's not a problem. (Unless they are obviously suffering from a manic episode.) I've noticed that I feel best on prolonged vacations when I can revert to my normal cycle, which during the normal work year I rarely get to indulge in. For me that's bed by 11PM and up at 7AM. My work often requires me to go to bed at 12AM or later and up at 5AM. Can't wait to retire.

Nichevo said...

Dear Laslo,

Isn't it time for you to post LonelyWebcamGirl15's poem? Fair is fair.

FullMoon said...

I wonder if Trump takes short naps?

William said...

Only on extremely rare occasions has anything bad happened to me while laying in bed, and absolutely nothing bad has happened to me while sleeping. They say you can never be too young, too rich or too thin. Add to that you can never be too well rested.

Eric Palmer, PeopleSoft Consultant said...

I understand the research, but it is faulty. I used to be a seven hour a night person. During a long system implementation project i deliberately cut my sleep to 4 1/2 hours. I reasoned it was the only way to succeed on the project and have time for my family. After about four months i was about to give in, because i was constantly so tired i could not function effectively. Then one morning i woke up at 4am feeling perfectly fine and rested. I've been sleeping less than five hours a night for the past five years without an issue.

Old Camera Guy said...

Trump only needs 4 hours? That doesn't surprise me. Many, many driven and accomplished people need less sleep than most. Isambard Kingdom Brunel and Thomas Edison were famous in their time for their short sleep habits.

A few summers back, I was vacationing in New Brunswick, and visited the Van Horne summer estate on Minister's Island. William Van Horne was the guy who supervised the construction of the first trans-Canada railway, the Canadian Pacific. He only slept 4 hours a night, and needed 3 shifts of office staff, 24/7, to keep up with him.

(I first wrote that as "3 shifts of secretaries just to keep up with him" and it sounded too Laslo-ish.)

Another driven guy who needs little sleep, apparently: William Shatner. Make up your own joke about "shifts of yeomen."