Althouse: "A Pewaukee man faces a disorderly conduct charge after a woman walked in on him and his girlfriend having sex in a bathroom at the Waukesha Public Library last month."

May 2, 2015

"A Pewaukee man faces a disorderly conduct charge after a woman walked in on him and his girlfriend having sex in a bathroom at the Waukesha Public Library last month."

A few questions about this story.

1. Why was only the man arrested? Answer: The woman didn't have a prior arrest. She received a citation. (Double meaning intended.)

2. If I walked in on private business in a bathroom where the door was accidentally left unlocked, I'd just quickly apologize, close the door, and try to forget about it. Wouldn't you?

3. Those "family bathrooms" — which, I take it, are completely enclosed rooms with a toilet and a sink — what are the limits of what you're allowed to do in private in there? Obviously, they must anticipate that some people are going to use them for sexual purposes. If you don't make noise that can be heard outside the room, leave any mess, or take too long and you do successfully manage to get the door locked, would anything stop you?

60 comments:

Gahrie said...: If he attempted to lock the door first, he should walk.....; 5/2/15, 9:43 AM
campy said...: Why was only the man arrested? Answer: The woman didn't have a prior arrest.

That's the rationalization. The actual answer is: female privilege.; 5/2/15, 9:50 AM
Big Mike said...: Rectitude by a very narrow margin over #4. Someone with a little child may really need the room and I shouldn't be tying it up for hours at time pleasuring my girlfriend.; 5/2/15, 9:50 AM
traditionalguy said...: This post raises so many propriety questions:

But did they clean up properly and flush?

Did they use proper birth control?

And can we still get her phone number from the stall wall?; 5/2/15, 9:50 AM
Bob Boyd said...: They clearly need a painting in the library: Red background, young guy in the lower left hand corner with his pants around his ankles and his "squirt gun" pointing at three huge cops in SWAT gear.; 5/2/15, 9:52 AM
Michael K said...: "can we still get her phone number from the stall wall?"

Yes. A couple was found having sex in the toilet of an airplane. That is a feat worthy of a circus act.

Mile-High Club.; 5/2/15, 9:53 AM
Leslie Graves said...: If that happened to me, I would have a hard time believing that the door had truly been accidentally left unlocked.

I would tend to suspect that there was an element of exhibitionism/"oh fun we might get caught!!" going on.; 5/2/15, 9:53 AM
bwebster said...: Ann: The last two polls you've had have given me 'server error' messages when I've tried to vote in them.; 5/2/15, 9:55 AM
traditionalguy said...: What do you expect when you name your town Pewaukee. Why not use a proper Norwegian name like Ragnarborg?; 5/2/15, 9:56 AM
retired said...: I would have called the police. It's illegal and a public health hazard, not to mention the children in the library and the disgusting nature of sex in a public place.; 5/2/15, 9:57 AM
chuck said...: If they were looking for a thrill, they got that. Something to tell the grandkids.; 5/2/15, 9:59 AM
I Have Misplaced My Pants said...: People are so uptight and so sadly willing to sweat the small stuff. I would, and have, absolutely just said, "Oh I'm so sorry," and walked away with an amused expression and a story to tell later.; 5/2/15, 9:59 AM
Wince said...: Isn't this criminal statute unconstitutionally vague for failure to include a mens rea component, which seems vital as applied to this case? Notice the intent component inserted by the court in the on-stage nudity case below.

947.01 Disorderly conduct.

(1) Whoever, in a public or private place, engages in violent, abusive, indecent, profane, boisterous, unreasonably loud or otherwise disorderly conduct under circumstances in which the conduct tends to cause or provoke a disturbance is guilty of a Class B misdemeanor.

(2) Unless other facts and circumstances that indicate a criminal or malicious intent on the part of the person apply, a person is not in violation of, and may not be charged with a violation of, this section for loading, carrying, or going armed with a firearm, without regard to whether the firearm is loaded or is concealed or openly carried.
History: 1977 c. 173; 1979 c. 131; 2011 a. 35.

The defendant was properly convicted of disorderly conduct when he appeared on a stage wearing a minimum of clothing intending to and succeeding in causing a loud reaction in the audience. State v. Maker, 48 Wis. 2d 612, 180 N.W.2d 707 (1970).

Disorderly conduct does not necessarily require disruptions that implicate the public directly. This section encompasses conduct that tends to cause a disturbance or disruption that is personal or private in nature, as long as there exists the real possibility that the disturbance or disruption will spill over and disrupt the peace, order, or safety of the surrounding community as well. Sending repeated, unwelcome, and anonymous mailings was "otherwise disorderly conduct." State v. Schwebke, 2002 WI 55, 253 Wis. 2d 1, 644 N.W.2d 666, 99-3204.

Defiance of a police officer's order to move is itself disorderly conduct if the order is lawful. Braun v. Baldwin, 346 F.3d 761 (2003).; 5/2/15, 10:02 AM
Be said...: Glad to see somebody taking this sort of stuff seriously.

Was once scolded by security at the main library for getting on one of those stepladder things while wearing a skirt, apparently because of all the peeping tom / upskirt voyeurism stuff going on in the stacks at the time.; 5/2/15, 10:09 AM
phantommut said...: If it were a restroom at a bar or a club, big woops. Kids go to libraries though and often go to the bathroom. Sorry, that's not the kind of education I take my children to the library to get.; 5/2/15, 10:18 AM
MayBee said...: People are so uptight and so sadly willing to sweat the small stuff. I would, and have, absolutely just said, "Oh I'm so sorry," and walked away with an amused expression and a story to tell later.

I don't know. I think having sex in the public library is pretty unnecessary.
I would have at least told them to lock the doors. I certainly wouldn't have wanted to apologize.; 5/2/15, 10:19 AM
lemondog said...: Initially thought Pewaukee was some sort of play on words.... Pewaukee, Wisconsin

Julie's parents need to slap her upside the head. Prior arrest shows that the guy is ick!

Goralski was previously convicted of violating a domestic abuse injunction and having sex with a child 16 or older, the complaint revealed. Dahms is 19, according to her Facebook page.; 5/2/15, 10:23 AM
Laslo Spatula said...: "Rectumtude."

With apologies to Dustin Hoffman and Ann Bancroft:

Ms. Althouse, are you trying to troll me?

I am Laslo.; 5/2/15, 10:25 AM
Etienne said...: Ah, but they do leave a mess, they do. I've seen the mess, and these people should be allowed to be cut with razor blades by the janitors.; 5/2/15, 10:27 AM
alan markus said...: This article doesn't mention that of the 11 prior arrests on his record over the past 12 years (drug, domestic violence, disorderly conduct, bail jumping, repeat offender), two of them were for sex with a child older than 16. On 12/10/14 he was given a State Prison Sentence that was imposed and stayed for 18 months.

Not the kind of guy most families would want their kids to encounter in a library or any other place. And the guy is 30 years old, should have outgrown that behavior by now.; 5/2/15, 10:28 AM
James Pawlak said...: With so many phone cameras available, the only rational solution is to photograph/"film" the event and try to sell it for personal profit OR as a donation to the library.; 5/2/15, 10:34 AM
Anne in Rockwall, TX said...: God I miss the 70s. It was the Laslo of decades.; 5/2/15, 10:40 AM
Fabi said...: The venue is offensive - you don't pull that crap at the library. I've had sex on more than one occasion in a bathroom at a bar. If you're all tweaked on Ecstacy and the moment is right, you really don't want to wait to get back to the house or your room.; 5/2/15, 10:46 AM
Chuck said...: This is only a half-serious question. "Half" because I already know the answer; and "serious" because of what that answer is.

What would have happened in this case if it had been gay sex that was going on in the unlocked bathroom? Would the participants have been charged with anything?; 5/2/15, 11:03 AM
jr565 said...: "2. If I walked in on private business in a bathroom where the door was accidentally left unlocked, I'd just quickly apologize, close the door, and try to forget about it. Wouldn't you?"

I probably would too, but business have rights to not have their bathrooms become places where people fornicate.; 5/2/15, 11:08 AM
Gahrie said...: disgusting nature of sex in a public place.

Is having sex in a public bathroom really more disgusting than taking a shit in one?; 5/2/15, 11:14 AM
Anonymous said...: Despite the fact that I had sex in the work bathroom in my 20s, I'd still complain now because of the sanitary aspect.

And if I happened to kneejerk apologize, I'd be really angry with myself later. Wtf? No, I actually don't expect a public bathroom to be used for sex commonly, but I'm female.; 5/2/15, 11:27 AM
J2 said...: No. Because the lighting in most public bathrooms is harsh and unforgiving.; 5/2/15, 11:28 AM
T J Sawyer said...: ... of the 11 prior arrests on his record over the past 12 years (drug, domestic violence, disorderly conduct, bail jumping, repeat offender)

So while A.A.'s reaction might be, "I'd just quickly apologize, close the door, and try to forget about it. ," a responding officers might think,

"Oh, it's you again!" and consider giving the guy a bumpy ride downtown via some back roads.; 5/2/15, 11:31 AM
sinz52 said...: Michael K:

Having sex in the toilet of an airplane is nothing compared to what one couple attempted: to have sex in midair while skydiving.

They jumped out of the plane and tried to have sex before opening their parachutes.

http://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/sex-sent-me-to-the-er/videos/sex-and-sky-diving/; 5/2/15, 11:49 AM
Simon Kenton said...: I was taught that it was a poor idea to write tickets or arrest for petty misdemeanors unless I had seen them committed. The complaining witnesses were too often vengeful or biased, and operated from a parallel, personal criminal code that had no necessary connection to the real code: "I don't care, officer, if it's not illegal it should be." They would flake the trial date, or fail to convince on the stand. Unless these people have said too much to the officers (of course, anything said to an officer is too much), this looks like a loser.; 5/2/15, 12:10 PM
Jason said...: He should walk.

She should walk funny.; 5/2/15, 12:11 PM
Tari said...: There was a couple at my high school that regularly had sex in the bathroom in the classroom wing. Not during the class day, but during free time in the evenings (it was boarding school). They looked at the rules and discovered that sex itself wasn't against the rules - it was being in the wrong dorm room that got you in trouble. It was an open secret at school, and when the girl graduated, she listed one of her activities as "bathroom decorating". I have always been half disgusted and half amused by that story; one way or the other, no one would have ever told the administration on them.; 5/2/15, 12:13 PM
MaxedOutMama said...: If you are going to have sex in a public library bathroom without locking the door, the cops should warn you off at a minimum. Absolutely, call the cops. The woman just reported it to library staff.

Come on. What adult can't figure out how to lock a door?

You would like to be able to send your kid to the library, or drop the child off there, without running the risk that they are going to end up in the middle of a sexual encounter.

It's a politeness thing. Because they didn't lock the door, it was public sex, not private sex. One need not be a prude to think sex should be kept private.

Note: If I were in a purely adult setting, such as a bar, I would just shut the door and go to the next convenience, paying extreme attention to sanitary precautions during the period of use of that convenience.

You are being a bit arrogant here - I did a little research:
http://www.jsonline.com/news/waukesha/couple-naked-head-to-toe-accused-of-having-sex-at-waukesha-library-b99491713z1-301867201.html

According to the complaint, Goralski has prior convictions for violating a domestic abuse injunction, bail jumping, and having sex with a child 16 or older.

You wanna let him use the public restrooms at the library as a sexual convenience??? Really???

I think it's a damned good bet that Mr. Goralski deliberately didn't lock that door. But even if not, the officer responding probably used good judgement in not letting this slide.; 5/2/15, 12:26 PM
Marc in Eugene said...: This society's going to hell, tsk (and I'm not using the word 'hell' in its proper sense, else I would have capitalized it). Why should anyone have to 'anticipate that family restrooms are going to be used for sexual purposes'? A few years ago, accompanying an intellectually disabled person at one of the local malls and, opening the family room door, I was faced with an older man and two teenagers, definitely not dead. I suspect the door had not been properly locked; needless to say, have never again trusted those red and green in use/not in use notices. Called the non-emergency police number, as soon as I could.; 5/2/15, 12:26 PM
Anonymous said...: Of course he got in trouble and she didn't. Under half of our population is male. Yet over 90% of the prison population is male.

So, if you believe that having 13% of our society as black but 40% of our prisoners are black = racism. Then you must also believe that our system is sexist as well.

And when I say you, I dont mean Ann Althouse in particular. I mean anyone who believes it.; 5/2/15, 12:39 PM
Fabi said...: I've made that very point many times, eric. I've never heard anyone complain that the prison system is sexist, so how in the heck can they complain it's racist? Ask one of the SJWs to reconcile that. They can't do it.; 5/2/15, 1:05 PM
Etienne said...: Gahrie asks...Is having sex in a public bathroom really more disgusting than taking a s--t in one?

Yes it is. One you would do in front of your mother, the other you wouldn't.

This is something that separates humans from animals. Of course in lower culture forms, such as in Islam, there is no reason to honor your mother, or public bathroom.; 5/2/15, 1:15 PM
Johanna Lapp said...: I have to ask Big Mike: If you can (and will) spend hours pleasuring your girlfriend, why is she not your wife? Or at least yout fiancee?; 5/2/15, 1:25 PM
exhelodrvr1 said...: Bathroom cams!!; 5/2/15, 1:31 PM
Paul said...: If I walked into a guy and gal bumping pelvises I'd just tell them to lock the dang door then I'd leave.

Now if I found two guys doing... well that's just disgusting... and yea, I'd call the cops.

If two gals... might watch (yea yea.. double standard there.)

If it was an adult and child... you guys here do know I pack heat, right? CHL. Stop it right there with a citizens arrest, no two ways about it.; 5/2/15, 1:39 PM
PackerBronco said...: Ah yes, two more acolytes of the Church of the Holy Orgasm.; 5/2/15, 1:48 PM
n.n said...: In order to preserve a common standard of decency, there is a bedroom for that. No need to imitate lower forms of life.; 5/2/15, 2:02 PM
Mark said...: How degrading and condescending to effectively reduce people to their genital activity, as if they were nothing more than animals humping, and to act as if it is normative and commonplace. And then to think that the person in the wrong in such a situation, the person who should apologize, is the one imposed upon. How can someone think so little of other people or of themselves?; 5/2/15, 2:10 PM
Gahrie said...: In order to preserve a common standard of decency

What standard of decency? We haven't had a common standard of decency since 1968! Hell most of the political Left today rejects the notion that there is such a thing.; 5/2/15, 2:11 PM
Fabi said...: Bedroom? Boat, trampoline, beach, kitchen, car, back deck, pool, bathroom, office, den, laundry room, bathtub - just a few that I can remember. C'mon, live a little! Sex ain't dirty.; 5/2/15, 2:15 PM
Gahrie said...: Common standard of decency?

There is a car ad currently running on broadcast TV at all hours of the day, in which a grandmotherly type makes domination remarks in a car with children in it.

There was a Jack in the Box commercial that did the same thing, and even featured a spiked collar.; 5/2/15, 2:16 PM
Fabi said...: Forgot the golf course. How could I forget that time?

It's in the hole!!; 5/2/15, 2:18 PM
Fabi said...: Last one, lest I move in on Laslo's turf: hood of the car.

We'd only been married a few weeks and got back very, very early in the morning from a party and just piled out onto the hood. Totally crushed the bonnet of a new 5-Series. I made my wife file the insurance claim. It was her car, after all. And her idea. Not sure why I divorced her...; 5/2/15, 2:26 PM
Etienne said...: Fabi said...Not sure why I divorced her...

She was a cow, that's why.; 5/2/15, 2:30 PM
Fabi said...: Misogynist much, Coupe?; 5/2/15, 2:50 PM
Laslo Spatula said...: Scarlett Johansson and I were at a party at Tom Hanks' place and considered having some quick stand-up sex in one of the bathrooms: there were like twenty bathrooms all over the estate, and they were all cleaner than most people's kitchens -- he obviously has great maids.

So we went into one of the bathrooms on the second floor, and it was bigger than many people's bedrooms: elegant colors, soft lighting, real flowers, expensive soaps at the sink. Scarlett starts to hike her skirt up when I notice that, in the light fixture above the toilet, there was a small hidded camera.

Curiosity piqued, we went from bathroom to bathroom looking at the ceilings, and, sure enough: there was a tiny hidden camera above each of the toilets.

We found Tom Hanks passing down a hall and stopped him.

"Tom, what's with all the cameras in the bathrooms?" I ask.

"You saw them?" he says, eyes narrowed.

"Yes, we saw them, Tom," Scarlett says, a hint of anger in her throaty sexy voice.

Then Tom starts to reply in that same way he does in movies when he is communicating sincerity: he talks haltingly, then rephrases the sentence with measured conviction.

"I... like. to. watch. people. take... a crap," he replies. "I like to watch people crap."

"Evidently," Scarlett says, with scorn.

"I can't help it. Wouldn't you want to know -- if given the chance -- what, exactly, does -- say -- Meryl Streep look like when she takes a shit?"

"The thought has never crossed my mind," I say.

"She is classy, almost regal," Tom continues. "Great posture, and very graceful pulling squares of toilet paper from the roll and gently folding them in half."

"On the other hand," Tom continues, "Helen Mirren craps like a football linebacker. I did not expect that, the first time."

"Tom," Scarlett says, staring him in the eye, "we are going to have to tell people. They have a right to expect privacy in the bathroom, of all places."

"But I could show you so many videos -- you'll see what I mean. For instance: Jessica Alba? While she is shitting on the toilet she slips off her shoes and cuts her toenails."

"Tom --"

"And George Clooney? He recites award acceptance speeches when he craps. And Jennifer Lawrence -- she claps happily for herself like a small child when she finishes..."

We left Tom there, muttering about how Matt Damon and Ben Affleck take turns shitting together and giving each other High Fives, and exited the party.

Scarlett and I have noticed that -- since that discovery -- Tom Hanks has not been rewarded an Oscar by his peers ever since.

Things have a way of getting around.

I am Laslo.; 5/2/15, 3:14 PM
William said...: There are only so many clean, accessible restrooms in the world. If it becomes common practice for couples to spend their honeymoon in such places, then where will the rest of us be. There are needs more urgent than sex, and horn dogs should take cognizance of them.; 5/2/15, 3:15 PM
David said...: They didn't want to wake up the baby.

(Facebook reveals that the happy couple have a child at home.); 5/2/15, 3:37 PM
virgil xenophon said...: "God I miss the 70s. It was the Laslo of decades."

LOL. Looking back and pondering (are you pondering what I'm pondering? *h/t Pinky & the Brain) I can see that Texas Annie nails it! Perfect analogy!; 5/2/15, 3:38 PM
Be said...: Back when I was an etudiante, peeing in the university toilets was a Team Activity. Forget about locks, there were no doors on the stalls. Also, never knew who might be waiting for whom given the level of security on the campus.

(Mentioned this before in re: unisex toilets.); 5/2/15, 3:39 PM
Guildofcannonballs said...: What if I were to tell you, your sense of morality and mine don't align.; 5/2/15, 5:15 PM
RecChief said...: "Obviously, they must anticipate that some people are going to use them for sexual purposes."

Obviously?

Good lord, what goes on in your mind? What I anticipate is a parent with a young child that needs a diaper changed, or a young child that is barely potty trained.; 5/2/15, 7:02 PM
Big Mike said...: @Johanna, I was being facetious. My wife and I celebrated our fortieth anniversary a few months ago and I certainly hope I keep her happy. At my age I've gone from tri-weekly (three times a week) to try weakly.

No, I don't know why she puts up with me.; 5/2/15, 8:24 PM
averagejoe said...: They both deserve to be pissed on. And that guy needs a punch in the face.; 5/3/15, 2:19 AM