Althouse: Just call me Elaine Glad.

March 9, 2015

Just call me Elaine Glad.

I'm using the "Chelsea Clinton Fake E-Mail Name Generator: your mother’s middle name and the first thing you see when you open the kitchen drawer."

45 comments:

Ron said...: I did one of these things where they wanted your middle name and the street you were raised....which in my case turned out to be

"George Carlin"; 3/9/15, 1:57 PM
DanTheMan said...: Rita Grapefruit-Spoon; 3/9/15, 1:59 PM
richard mcenroe said...: Hi, I'm Patrick Dead Fly. Apparently I'm Native American and didn't know it.; 3/9/15, 2:00 PM
JRoberts said...: I want to know what Hillary's "Carlos Danger" e-mail name is...; 3/9/15, 2:01 PM
Ron said...: So this blog could be renamed

"Glad"

hmmm....; 3/9/15, 2:02 PM
Unknown said...: June Fork? I could just as easily go with June Spoon. Rhymes with moon in a tin pan alley tune.; 3/9/15, 2:05 PM
Laura said...: Always, always use the kitchen drawer.

The desk drawer leads to items somewhat telling, with variations of "panties" or "cigars."; 3/9/15, 2:15 PM
Skeptical Voter said...: Ward Cleaver.

But since we're on the distaff side here,I'll go with

Beaver Cleaver. Make of that what you will Laslo Spatula.

But Hillary's hunkering in the bunker and not coming out and defending herself is probably a mistake. And I think it was Napoleon Bonaparte who said, "Never interrupt your opponent while they are making a mistake."

So a word to Hillary, "Sweetie, stay in the bunker."; 3/9/15, 2:24 PM
Anonymous said...: Ironically, my name ends up being 'Laslo Spatula'.

Even more ironically, I am and am not 'Laslo Spatula'.; 3/9/15, 2:29 PM
Mr. D said...: If I use my mom's name, it would be Jane Church Key.

If I use my dad's name and open a different drawer, it would be Louis Ziploc.; 3/9/15, 2:35 PM
Sharc said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 3/9/15, 2:37 PM
Alexander said...: Ann Sellotape... I might get some looks if I tried to use it.; 3/9/15, 2:39 PM
Julie C said...: Lillian Crumb; 3/9/15, 2:49 PM
Sal said...: Using dad's middle name: Ivan Duct Tape. Sounds fake.; 3/9/15, 2:50 PM
Bob Boyd said...: Anita Screw; 3/9/15, 2:53 PM
Sam L. said...: If the New Yorker is satirizing this, I'm guessing support for Hillary! is dwindling fast.; 3/9/15, 3:24 PM
readering said...: Al Kikkoman; 3/9/15, 3:30 PM
sparrow said...: Benjamin Oatmeal; 3/9/15, 3:37 PM
Eleanor said...: Emma Peeler; 3/9/15, 3:43 PM
Big Mike said...: If Chelsea opened her refrigerator instead, she'd be Diane Swanson.; 3/9/15, 3:46 PM
Tom said...: Rose Whisk; 3/9/15, 4:01 PM
Tom said...: Wilma Fingerdoo... Okay, that's not really it but that name cracks me up.; 3/9/15, 4:03 PM
Michelle Dulak Thomson said...: I don't think I'm going to get anywhere as "Joan Swivel Peeler."; 3/9/15, 4:05 PM
Anonymous said...: Charles Halfcup; 3/9/15, 4:10 PM
LordSomber said...: Ann Kale.

She must be a hipster.; 3/9/15, 4:50 PM
LordSomber said...: I want to know what Hillary's "Carlos Danger" e-mail name is…

Ron Mexico?; 3/9/15, 4:52 PM
I Have Misplaced My Pants said...: Marie Brush; 3/9/15, 4:56 PM
Deb said...: Winnell Keurig.; 3/9/15, 5:21 PM
RMc said...: Ann Canopener. (Pronounced the French way: KAHN-opp-AY-NAY.); 3/9/15, 5:23 PM
Anonymous said...: "Kitchen drawer" is not a unique specification. I have something like eight, three of which I actually use regularly. And I don't know the names of everything in them; there are some utensils I could only refer to as "that thing that. . . ."; 3/9/15, 5:35 PM
Fernandinande said...: Miriam Clothespin

Better names from D.Barry:

"Ole Ass" in the 1940 Census
http://www.archives.com/1940-census/ole-ass-mn-42715040

"Fart Low" United States Census, 1940
https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/V1LG-R7B

"Albino Urine" in the 1940 Census
http://www.ancestry.com/1940-census/usa/California/Albino-Urine_2jr66f

"Vagina M Buckerhoff" in 1920 Census
https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/M8CZ-ZSW

"Ima Urethra Mosher"
https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/V6QJ-GQM

"Pervy Tingle"
https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/VBSK-X4Q

"Nipple Iovine"
https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:XGNP-12W

"Gustus Penile"
https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:MN47-TMH

"Gas Ball"
https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:JYLH-444

"Angeline Smelling Forbush"
https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:N436-DJ5a

"Blow D Organ"
https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:M6YH-MGG

"Stinken Kox"
https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/JH4X-35L; 3/9/15, 5:37 PM
Yancey Ward said...: Be thankful you aren't Elaine Roach.; 3/9/15, 7:31 PM
Tamika said...: Nice post. Thank you for sharing valuable information on this subject matter, If you need more subscribers read this; 3/9/15, 7:38 PM
ken in tx said...: Lucile Texas Tough; 3/9/15, 7:44 PM
MadisonMan said...: Both of my parents have last names for middle names (how wasp-y), so I'll regress to grandmother:

Cornelia IceCreamScoop.; 3/9/15, 9:09 PM
Edmund said...: Hi, I'm Roy Foodsaver.

I saw in the article that someone used "Nick Danger". Since it's taken, I'll be Rocky Rococo. My wife can be Betty Jo Bialosky, (AKA Melanie Haber, Audrey Farber, and Susan Underhill).; 3/9/15, 9:33 PM
Scott said...: Olive Knife.; 3/9/15, 9:57 PM
Paul said...: Uh.. Paul 'butterknife'?

Do you think the Russian and Chinese hackers were fooled by the email names they used?

Do you think their passwords were sophisticated like their names?; 3/9/15, 10:38 PM
Barbara said...: Lucille Shrimp Sheller. I think I could live with that.; 3/10/15, 1:10 AM
Lewis Wetzel said...: Muriel hotsaucepacket; 3/10/15, 3:59 AM
Rusty said...: Martella Spoon; 3/10/15, 5:15 AM
Hammond X. Gritzkofe said...: Enough of this foolishness. From now on I'm using my real name.
- E. Normous Johnson; 3/10/15, 5:30 AM
chillblaine said...: Neither my mother nor my father had middle names. There was a Depression on, and everybody had to tighten their belts.; 3/10/15, 5:40 AM
tim maguire said...: I'm Elizabeth...any one of dozens of things depending on which drawer I decide to open and, because I will see many things at once, which thing I want as my last name.

Typical Clinton, you always get to pick your own facts.; 3/10/15, 5:55 AM
Michael said...: I thought it was your porn-star name, and it was your middle name and the street you lived on. I would have been Hal Grove at one time, which sounds porn-star-ish.; 3/10/15, 10:10 AM