Althouse: Why does Grace Kelly's son, Prince Albert, look like that?

June 23, 2010

Why does Grace Kelly's son, Prince Albert, look like that?

He's only 52. And look at that woman who is marrying him.

Well, I think we know the answer. It's obvious. Men only look as good as they need to.

55 comments:

Ron said...: Grace Kelly had a baby with Gavin MacCloud!; 6/23/10, 10:07 PM
Sydney said...: "Only" 52? He looks like a 52 year old man who has gracefully accepted what nature has dealt him.; 6/23/10, 10:08 PM
jaed said...: I've seen worse. And we should all applaud Albert for at least eschewing a rug.

That second picture, however... there is no excuse for a wealthy man to be wearing a suit that ill-fitting. None. You can't make that much change to what you look like, but you can certainly control what your clothes look like better than that. Bah.; 6/23/10, 10:09 PM
Synova said...: There's no way to tell what his physique is like under the suits. He could be beefy instead of chubby.; 6/23/10, 10:15 PM
Stephen said...: Speaking of looks, oughtn't the Wittstock broad look less predatory?
I know it's an honest expression but still.
Eh, I'm old-fashioned.; 6/23/10, 10:21 PM
q12345q6789 said...: Yeah, maybe it's context. I mean he's lead a life of royal privilege and looks like that (i.e. it's certainly not Henry the VIII levels here) and she's 20 years younger and he is standing next to an Olympic swimmer. It could be a Whole Lots Worse! There's plenty of 30 year-old women in the USA who are way-way-way beyond his level of beefiness. I dunno. Maybe not in Madison. But, I doubt it.; 6/23/10, 10:24 PM
Unknown said...: Rich and idle ain't for sissies.

Besides, he doesn't look that bad.; 6/23/10, 10:26 PM
q12345q6789 said...: Oh, I get it. Althouse is just internalizing and then projecting an argument based on her interpretation of Meade at his age. Well, congrats for being happy, but if Meade were a Royal and knew he could bed and then, if he chose to, marry an Olympic swimmer 20 years his junior... He'd probably look like that too.; 6/23/10, 10:31 PM
Irene said...: One would think that a prince would have the resources to secure a better fitting tuxedo. Armani, Alberto?

On the one hand, the apple doesn't fall far from the (paternal) tree.

On the second hand, the Grimaldi family descended from pirates banished from Genoa.; 6/23/10, 10:36 PM
JAL said...: What's the deal with the second photo?

No airbrushing in sight.

And Charelene needs to relax, not chill.

But then, I think the Swedes will be hard to beat.; 6/23/10, 10:42 PM
Irene said...: JAL, that was exactly my thought.; 6/23/10, 10:43 PM
MadisonMan said...: Grace Kelly brought a dowry of $2M (back in the 50s!). I wonder what Charlene is bringing to the marriage.; 6/23/10, 10:50 PM
Anonymous said...: Jesus, this reminds me of my mother trying to dress me in the morning. At least she didn't come up with pop-psychology justifications.

That said, without the ladies in my life, my grooming skills aren't so hot.; 6/23/10, 10:58 PM
GMay said...: Yeah, because women have excuses for their fat asses, thighs, and ill-fitting sweat pants. When men do it, they're just deadbeat assholes.; 6/23/10, 10:58 PM
Fred4Pres said...: She is pretty and I suspect she had to show she can have kids.; 6/23/10, 11:11 PM
Fred4Pres said...: I missed the second picture on first glance. Okay, I get what you are talking about.; 6/23/10, 11:13 PM
Fred4Pres said...: He is downright Jon Favreauish...

without the Jew Fro*.

* That was a joke in I Love You Man.; 6/23/10, 11:15 PM
David said...: Marrying your Mother never goes out of style.; 6/23/10, 11:19 PM
q12345q6789 said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 6/23/10, 11:32 PM
former law student said...: The prince looks pretty boyish to me. I would have guessed 35 -- I knew a lot of prematurely bald guys at that age.

Did anyone notice the article of Lenny Henry (51) dumping the dumpy Dawn French (52), after 25 years together?

(lenny does standup, while Dawn writes comedy and acts.; 6/23/10, 11:44 PM
David said...: "Men only look as good as they need to."

And for most women, that's not very good.; 6/23/10, 11:54 PM
Julie C said...: The Project Rungay guys did a post on the recent Swedish royal wedding and showed pictures of all the royals who attended, including the fair Albert and his girl.

I was struck by how dowdy the women were, no matter their age. They are so restricted in what they can wear to these kind of events. They all have to wear these sashes indicating their royal status - anyways, I'm sure once she marries Albert she'll be reduced to wearing ugly pastel colored mother of the bride dresses to all the formal events.; 6/24/10, 12:01 AM
jamboree said...: She's beautiful - and a lot of trophy wives really aren't. They're younger than the guys, but not striking.

I think he looks pretty normal 52. You either go bald or you don't. He looks like he's held a desk job. Hah.; 6/24/10, 12:08 AM
Kurt said...: Yeah, I don't think he looks all that bad for his age. He could look better, but he could definitely look a lot worse. As Jaed says, at least he's not wearing a rug. There's also no comb-over here, either. He's probably chubby more than beefy, but he could be a mix of the two. You can't tell from the pictures. I actually thought his face looked a little better in the second picture (wearing the glasses) than without the glasses. The main problem with the second picture is that he looks all washed out because the lighting is harsh and unflattering.; 6/24/10, 12:24 AM
Christy said...: Interesting to note a line from the adjoining article FLS pointed out about the Dawn French, 52, breakup from her 51 year old husband: "Lenny, of course, is a great extrovert and incorrigible flirt. He may be middle-aged and on the portly side, but he has tremendous charisma and women find him very attractive." Apparently Althouse would not be one of those women.

Dawn French, btw, is the lady in the portrait at the entrance to the Gryffindor common room at Hogwarts --- for the parents among you who've sat through countless watchings of Prisoner of Azkaban. Although I can't get my Mom to sit through it once.; 6/24/10, 3:05 AM
Will Cate said...: Why does he look like what? A folically-challenged middle-aged man? C'mon, Ann, he just looks like an ordinary dude.; 6/24/10, 5:09 AM
Unknown said...: Fred4Pres said...

She is pretty and I suspect she had to show she can have kids.

If her guy is a royal, she'd have to.

David said...

Marrying your Mother never goes out of style.

I want a girl,
Just like the girl...; 6/24/10, 6:15 AM
rhhardin said...: She looks like trouble to me.; 6/24/10, 6:54 AM
bagoh20 said...: Exactly, rhhardin. It's all down hill from here, Prince. This will be loveless in short order, if not already.; 6/24/10, 7:48 AM
ricpic said...: Maybe it isn't a man's job to look good.

Is it a blessing or a curse to be born with a silver spoon in your mouth?; 6/24/10, 7:57 AM
Darcy said...: Umm...what is wrong with the way he looks?

Lovely couple.; 6/24/10, 8:10 AM
Anonymous said...: I'm not impressed that he has two "love children." You'd think he'd have the sense to not get into that situation even once. Twice is unforgivable.; 6/24/10, 8:54 AM
rhhardin said...: The Prince looks like Tim Conway.; 6/24/10, 9:05 AM
MnMark said...: Yeah, what is wrong with the way he looks?

What exactly could he even do to look much better? If you're bald, you're bald. He's not particularly fat either. I'm not sure what he's supposed to be doing to look better.; 6/24/10, 9:09 AM
Franklin said...: Dude doesn't look that bad. Actually looks decent for 52. She's a hottie, sure, but it's not like he's Harold Meyerson or something.

http://media.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/photo/2006/12/07/PH2006120701271.jpg; 6/24/10, 9:10 AM
Phil 314 said...: Synova;
There's no way to tell what his physique is like under the suits.

Speaking as a gentleman in his 50's I really appreciate your tact.; 6/24/10, 9:30 AM
Scott said...: Little-known fact:

Prince Albert of Monaco is actually Larry Kellner, CEO of Continental Airlines.

That's why you never see them in the same picture.; 6/24/10, 9:35 AM
Dust Bunny Queen said...: What's wrong with him?

He can't help his genes. So....he is balding early, sort of short and looks like an accountant.

Big deal.

Who want to be married to a man who is absorbed with his own appearance: spending time in tanning booths, getting hair plugs, hours in front of the mirror, obsessing about his pectoral muscles, etc.

Besides....I understand that balding men have higher testosterone levels. /wink wink.; 6/24/10, 9:39 AM
Original Mike said...: Yeah, I sure hope Althouse was talking about his suit in the second picture.; 6/24/10, 9:50 AM
Original Mike said...: If you were kept in a can your suit would look like that, too.; 6/24/10, 9:53 AM
John said...: His hot girlfriend ought to ask around about the Grace Kelly. She lived a pretty miserable life. It sounds great to princess and all. But ultimately you are baby making machine and a piece of furniture. You are also the head of the church in Monaco and can't really have any life of your own beyond your cerimonial dutues. And yes, your playboy husband will start cheating on you the day after you give him a mail heir.

The job isn't what she thinks it is going to be.; 6/24/10, 9:55 AM
Dust Bunny Queen said...: The job isn't what she thinks it is going to be.

But....the ring is pretty hot.

LOL: Prince Albert in a can.; 6/24/10, 10:04 AM
Original Mike said...: But then, she wasn't talking about the suit, since his age would be irrelavent to that.; 6/24/10, 10:13 AM
MadisonMan said...: Ditto. (The LOL part); 6/24/10, 10:14 AM
former law student said...: Good point about Larry Kellner -- and Mrs. Kellner is no slouch, either:

http://www.springbranchisd.com/board/current/kellner.jpg

Not bad for the mother of four, IMHO.; 6/24/10, 10:26 AM
paul a'barge said...: male pattern baldness.

Women are such bee-yotches.; 6/24/10, 10:36 AM
PJ said...: Shorter Althouse: My prince is cuter than her prince.; 6/24/10, 10:48 AM
John said...: The last person who pulled off marrying royalty with any style was the Queen Mum. She was a hoot and radiated class and dignity. The ones now, Diana, Grace Kelly, this woman, Latizia of Spain, just come across as whoring gold diggers happy to be arm candy and trade their dignity for a crown.; 6/24/10, 10:56 AM
Trooper York said...: "Why does Grace Kelly's son, Prince Albert, look like that?"

Because you are supposed to keep Prince Albert in the can.; 6/24/10, 11:25 AM
Kevin Walsh said...: He appears perfectly acceptable for 52 -- better than me, and I'm 52.

www.forgotten-ny.com; 6/24/10, 11:40 AM
rhhardin said...: One of Tiffany Eckhard's finest lyrics

Love’ll make you dream everything extreme
You will be my only one and I will be your queen.

real audio (modern real players will ask to download an older codec); 6/24/10, 12:04 PM
Scott said...: @FLS: I am (to quote Sullivan) gobsmacked -- Charlene Wittstock looks quite a bit like Mrs. Kellner!

This couple is obviously leading a mutual secret life. And it's understandable. Being a prince must be boring as hell. If you're talented, why not do something useful with your life, like being the CEO of America's best-run major airline?

In any case, he'll probably be out of a job after the Continental-United merger, so he will have to find something else to do with his time, like counting his money.; 6/24/10, 12:24 PM
former law student said...: The last person who pulled off marrying royalty with any style was the Queen Mum. She was a hoot and radiated class and dignity.

Not according to a museum volunteer I knew (museum volunteers all seem to be a tad bit eccentric). This woman went off on "Lady Bowes-Lyon" and her unsuitability to marry into the Royal Family. You would have thought the King had found her picking through a garbage dump for saleable scrap.; 6/24/10, 1:16 PM
Freeman Hunt said...: I think he looks fine.

The future wife is stunning.; 6/24/10, 2:30 PM
Dymphna said...: The man is 52. That's old. He looks fine for his age.; 6/25/10, 8:54 AM