July 12, 2007

Wetting the bed.

Here's an article about extremely expensive beds -- some over $50,000. It seems that the bed's ability to "breathe" is a big selling point, driven home by the news that you sweat like mad during the night. But how much?
“If you consider the average person sweats about a pint each night,” he said, pausing to let his words sink in...

“... you sweat one liter a night, and all that stays in the bed...”...

And then, like Mr. Burney, Mr. Ashe began tearing into Tempur-Pedic. “Take Memory Foam,” he began. “It’s synthetic, it’s dense, it doesn’t breathe, it’s hot, you end up lying in a pool of your own perspiration.”

The sweat again. How much did Mr. Ashe reckon the average person dropped in a bed each night? Was it, and I quoted Ms. Schleenvoigt, a liter?

“That’s disgusting,” he said. “I’m not sleeping with you. I’d say a cup, max.”

It sounds like these characters are all trying to dissuade you from going with the Tempur-Pedic. But if you're oozing that much water, do you really want it all seeping into the mattress? I think an impervious mattress with a thick, washable cover would be better.

And what's with the mattress salesman guy joking about sleeping with the customer? That's creepy! The writer doesn't flag it as creepy, though, so I'm assuming the guy is extremely handsome. Wouldn't you have to be to sell $50,000 beds?

24 comments:

Michael said...

Actually I have two layers of mem foam on top of my mattress and as long as you put a sheet on it and then your fitted one over that,there is no sweating and its just like a cloud.(without the rain)

Bissage said...

That salesman gives new meaning to “sleeping on the wet spot.”

Roger J. said...

If I recall my physiology classes, we pass about 400 ml of urine a day, and perspire between 3 to 4 hundred ml a day. A liter a night is a bit much, I think. But still....

Bissage said...

We splurged on a pretty expensive Kingsdown mattress. It’s king sized with a pillow top.

Flipping it every month is a colossal pain in the neck. But if we don’t, it’s a colossal pain in the back because it conforms to your most prevalent body position. When you turn, everything’s out of whack.

My advice is don’t buy one.

(I miss my old futon.)

KCFleming said...
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KCFleming said...

If one sleeps alone, there is no flop sweat.

bill said...

Wear a Stillsuit. Good for the environment and you'll always have something to drink.

Roger J. said...

Geez Bissage--I always felt futons were Japanese revenge for losing WWII--how much did you have to pay for a comfortable futon (assuming there is such a thing)?

reader_iam said...

A liter? Maybe at the height of menopause or something, if you're unlucky.

You know what they say: sleep is the new black.

EEEEK! OK, that's it. I'm rebelling. I will now endeavour to sleep even less and more restlessly than I do now, and on principle.

NO MORE NEW BLACKS!!!!!!

Sorry, despite my relatively high tolerance for cliches, that one makes me break out in a hot sweat.

Silas said...

If I recall my physiology classes, we pass about 400 ml of urine a day, and perspire between 3 to 4 hundred ml a day.

I think the perspiration volume is actually about double that, but the rate probably drops when you sleep, so maybe 200 ml per night.

PeterP said...

Night sweats have their uses - when I dream of drowning and wake sodden I know either I've drunk too much the night before or else my cancer has returned. Each is a handy hint. Or else it's suddenly summer and the duvet 'tog' rating is too high. So much you can learn from a bucket of sweat.

Bissage said...

Roger, you caught me!

That was 24 years ago and I bought the most expensive one they had.

I don't miss that futon so much as I miss my youth.

Pure nostalgia.

Ha!

(Back then, I was young and my heart was an open book. I used to say, "Live and let live.")

(Mr. Simels understands, he's a POP MUSIC CRITIC, you know.)

vet66 said...

I thought that was what sheets were for plus the duvet cover? Much of the moisture expelled is in the form of exhalation.

I think the salesmen selling an obscenely priced mattress such as the one advertised are using tactics designed to seperate a fool from his money.

I wonder where the mattress was made? China? It better be guaranteed for life!

George M. Spencer said...

The expression "sleep tight" originated in the days when ropes were interlaced below whatever was the matress. You tightened the ropes to rest more comfortably.

Just thought I'd mention that...

paul a'barge said...

All you brown shirts need to ...

wait.

I thought I was hdhouse for a minute there.

Sorry about that.

Roost on the Moon said...

I was considering picking one of these up, but I decided to buy 100 $500 mattresses and discard one every three months for 25 years. I'm a pretty sweaty guy.

Anonymous said...
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Tibore said...

"Geez Bissage--I always felt futons were Japanese revenge for losing WWII--how much did you have to pay for a comfortable futon (assuming there is such a thing)?"

ROTFLMAO so damn hard!... That's the best way I've ever heard those bleepin' things described!

-Tibore (not a futon fan)

BJK said...

Kinda disappointed there was no 'rubber sheets' / bedwetting joke.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Spend more. You get what you pay for.

Buy a futon with an innerspring mattress instead of the standard stuffed with corn cobs mattress. The one in our guest room is very comfortable especially when combined with a foam topper and quilted mattress cover.

raf said...

Yes, if you put a box spring underneath and a foam mattress on top, a futon can be very comfortable.

James in Belgrade said...

What I'd like to see is a bed with a thermostat. I don't need my entire apartment to be 76 degrees when I'm asleep, just my bed.

Roger J. said...

Richard confirms all of mine (and probably Tibore's) suspicions about futons.

lurker2209 said...

Ok, if you're producing a 200ml or a pint (or even a liter) of sweat at night, doesn't most of that evaporate?

I mean, isn't that the physiological purpose of sweat? Every mole of liquid water that gets converted into gasseous water vapor absorbs 44kJ of energy in the form of heat, cooling the skin.

Sure some fraction of the sweat doesn't evaporate, but a significant portion of that is absorbed by whatever clothing one wears (or doesn't wear) to bed, and then by the sheets, so the amount that actually absorbs into the mattress must be miniscule.