June 12, 2011

The 6 Possible Meanings of Anthony Weiner's Announcement that He's Checking into Treatment.

1. Anthony Weiner has realized, in all sincerity, that his masturbatory use of the internet is an illness for which there is effective professional treatment, to which he will submit because he desires wellness, because wellness is good and because he needs to be well to do his duty to his wife, his expected child, and his constituents.

2. Anthony Weiner would like to deprive us of the capacity to criticize and mock him him, and if he can successfully impose the illness template on the controversy, the mockers and critiques will — instead of him — seem like the bad people. He hopes.

3. After the "Huma is pregnant" gambit failed to turn off the criticism, Weiner had to move beyond the manly, dignified insistence on privacy and on to the more pathetic, humble cry to be left alone.

4. If he's in treatment, he's physically out of sight. He's off somewhere, and that might work to close the door. Perhaps we'll wait until he emerges again. Time will have passed. Things will have cooled off. And the reemerging Weiner will be the new Weiner, the after-treatment Weiner, and people will — he hopes — speak about who this new man is.

5. Pelosi, Wasserman Schultz, and other Democratic Party leaders told him he had to get the hell out of sight, and he followed orders.

6. Weiner is not really going into treatment. He just needs some time by himself, with his computer, and his wiener.

72 comments:

PWS said...

It's a combination of 1, 2, 4, and 5.

ironrailsironweights said...

A combination of #2 and #4, with possibly #5 as a lesser factor.

Peter

ironrailsironweights said...

his masturbatory use of the internet

Wait ... there's another use??

Peter

shake-and-bake said...

Well spank my butt and feed me supper.

AprilApple said...

2, 3, and 5.

Shouting Thomas said...

All of the above.

The guy is a compulsive liar and con man.

Like the best compulsive liars and con men, he believes his on lies and cons.

That's why he gets so pissed off when people refuse to buy into his BS.

DADvocate said...

You can rule out number 1. For starters, Janeane Garafalo pointed out it wasn't Weiner's fault, so there is no illness to realize or admit to. Plus, psychopaths never admit to a mental illness or fault with sincerity.

4 and 5 are the most likely.

Pogo said...

I'm guessing that hiding under a blanket wasn't effective.

No matter; Janeane Garofalo was OK with Weiner's actions, so for Dems he must be on the mend..

george said...

Another reason could be that his supply has been cut off and there is a lot of easy tail to be had in sex addiction clinics. Just saying is all...

America's Politico said...

I tink there are other meanings:

Weiner knows that he now is same as WJ Clinton. If he can be loved today, then so can Weiner.

Weiner knows that no one will ask which treatment he is going. So, this way he can escape, wait-out, etc.

Weiner knows that Congress is full of sick people (Rangel, Barney, Vitter, etc.). He is no different. He can wait out.

Weiner knows that reporters do not ask hard questions, like the registration of his black-berry information. So, by going away, the reporters will forget.

Weiner knows that he is living an American Dream, see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABfsIInfXgU. So, why change things?

MarkG said...

When he comes back no one will care about Weinergate unless there are more minors involved. He should've disappeared days ago.

BT said...

Weiner is going into therapy to do one thing and one thing only: To give himself cover. It is the equivalent of Don Imus going to Sharpton and asking for forgiveness after the "nappy headed ho's" comment or Clinton having a prayer meeting with J. Jackson right after the Monica fiasco surfaced and is about as sincere, which is to say it isn't. The question is will it work?

The one person who we have not heard from in this whole affair is his wife. If she comes out with a statement of support along the lines of “Anthony and I are working hard to make things better for the future and he looks forward to returning to serve his district…” the press will go wild because remember they are there to help D’s out of tough situations and this will give them the perfect excuse to do just that. Time will tell.

br549 said...

The dems, having no true moral rudder, don't want to chance losing one of their own when he could be replaced by a republican. So they want him out of sight until this blows over. Afterwards, he will be so indebted to them, well......

He doesn't know how to do anything else but be a bullshit politician. He's in debt up to his ass on Amex cards, which are to be paid in full when due. Amex cards are not revolving charge cards. Where else is he going to make the kind of money his constituents pay him? He has no salable skills.

DADvocate said...

Another aspect of Weiner going into treatment is that those providing treatment are held to confidentiality by law and ethics. Weiner can go into treatment and sext in front of a therapist and the therapist can't make any of it public. Heck, maybe he'll find a nice liberal female therapist to hook up with. Mental health professionals are heavily liberal.

Maguro said...

7. Needs time out of the spotlight to negoiate a contract with MSNBC for a new political analysis/sex advice show.

Fred4Pres said...

Anthony "The Wiener" Weiner finds that the treatment was not exactly what he had in mind.

Freeman Hunt said...

7. He figures there are a lot of babes who will appreciate his pics at the sex addiction clinic.

But I kid, I kid.

I think PWS has it. 1, 2, 4, and 5.

Phil 3:14 said...

At this point I feel a bit like the George C. Scott character in "Hard Core" where after trying many different ways of finding his runaway daughter he decides to masquerade as a porno director. After meeting several in the business he develops a deep sense of fatigue, disgust and boredom.

Here he meets "Big Dick Blaque"

realwest said...

Huh. I didn't know that the Mastubatory use of the Internet was an illness (absent using it as a substitute for for person-with-person sexual relations) nor that there was a treatment for same.
Methinks that Anthony Weiner is really going for #6 here; he's upset MOSTLY that he got caught and he has no source of income other than his Congressional paycheck of $151,000 year - no advanced degrees, no experience in any work that isn't political or governmental and while MSNBC might give him a job, I can't think of anything else he could do to earn a living.
I mean, who would want him as their Spokesperson - Oscar Meyer?

Freeman Hunt said...

8. He's sweating it out over his exchanges with the high school girl. Can they get a warrant for deleted Facebook messages? Will those turn out to be retrievable? He figures an addiction clinic is the best place to flee to in the meantime and would give him his best defense if it turns out that the deleted communications are recoverable.

NYTNewYorker said...

The Dem calls for Weiner to resign are for cover and cover only.

If Weiner is forced to resign what about all of the rest that were allowed to stay?

I'm looking at YOU Charles Rangel.

I'm looking at YOU Barney Frank.

The list goes on....

Big Mike said...

2 through 6.

Only #1 has no part in his calculations.

MarkG said...

"He figures there are a lot of babes who will appreciate his pics at the sex addiction clinic."

I wonder if sex addiction clinics are coed. Would that be heaven or hell? Depends on how tight security is, I suppose.

Writ Small said...

In addition to the benefits listed, some portion his wavering supporters will buy this as sincere. Where the right sees moral failings, the left sees the disease of addiction.

vet66 said...

The ultimate irony, Weiner became his own parody and screwed himself in front of the world. He lost control of his weinerness. In fact, we should now refer to him as "His Royal Weinerness!"

All knowing WV; opagthea- his therapist..

chr1 said...

Perhaps psychology, on some level, is the new penance for the political/idological secular moralists (going on Oprah is passe) as this is Harvard level stuff (or maybe just some state school...).

I follow the Pelosi moral compass:

1. Protect the party...do damage control...ask questions later

2. Use political rules in the most favorable light for the democratic party (ignore Maxine Waters, Charlie Rangel...they're black and held to a different moral standard, allow your political opponents to be tarred as racists...hope the Weiner thing blows over)

3. When it gets serious, act serious, and appear to care about Weiner's transgressions morally beyond your politics, because these Puritan rubes appear to have the public mind.

4. Give a speech to the base...appeal to everyone who agrees and doesn't mind advancing their ideals through such messy realities and slime of politics...somehow make this a wedge issue and Republican problem.

Hagar said...

Out of sight for a few days and hope they find somrthing - anything - in the Palin e-mails in the meantime.

Rialby said...

"Wait ... there's another use??"

No kidding. Think about how many times Garage and HDHouse have come here and masturbated all over these comment threads.

Fred4Pres said...

Tony "The Wiener" Weiner taking photos of himself in the House gym.

Just in case if you were wondering if Tony used government assets in his texting. The answer is probably, yes.

Typical Weiner supporter response: Is that a wiener in your hand, or are you just glad to text me?

David said...

george said...
Another reason could be that his supply has been cut off and there is a lot of easy tail to be had in sex addiction clinics. Just saying is all...


Sounds like George has been there, done that.

Mary Beth said...

I also pick 2, 4, and 5.

Weiner said that he only used his own computer and Blackberry to text to these girls. Has anyone tried to verify that he has a personal Blackberry along with his government one?

Writ Small said...

a bit off-topic, but I just saw Jim Pinkerton make the point on Fox News Watch that CNN missed a big story by not covering Breitbart's podium-stealing press conference - a point Ann pointed out to him on their bloggingheads Weiner roast.

He could have at least said "As Ann Althouse pointed out. . . "

DADvocate said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DADvocate said...

Fred - you beat me to it. The pix of Weiner in the House gym are, um, revealing. Weiner certainly likes to grasp his wiener.

The guy is sick. Your typical adolescent knows better than to do this shit.

wv revigger - what Weiner does in the House gym.

Almost Ali said...

Unfortunately, America's Politico has it about right.

Ricardo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DADvocate said...

...some portion his wavering supporters will buy this as sincere.

Will they buy it or just play along because Weiner is on their side?

AllenS said...

Freeman Hunt said...
Can they get a warrant for deleted Facebook messages?

You certainly can, if those messages are from Sarah Palin.

Ricardo said...

My guess is that it's #4. I would like to believe that it's #1, but he possesses an arrogance that transcends real caring about family, spouse, etc. In his mind, everything is viewed through the prism of his own wonderfulness. And that means that he's looking for the easiest possible way to restore his wonderfulness, without doing any of the hard work required to really BE wonderful.

My recommendation is that he turn himself over to Dr. Drew, and go on Celebrity Rehab #5, or whatever number we're up to. I say this because (1) it might do him some good, (2) it will eventually keep him in the spotlight, which is what he wants, (3) since he has no marketable skills it might open some new doors in the large Los Angeles market, and (4) it would give us (the viewers) some terrific entertainment (egomaniacs just can't help themselves ... they just always end up being entertaining). As we've discussed on previous threads, his real illness is narcissism, which is virtually untreatable in the short run, and requires an entire reworking of one's personality.

Fred4Pres said...

The readings of the writings of Congressman Weiner. I am not a Bill Maher fan, but this will never get old.

Old Dad said...

He's hiding and watching the polls in the home district. So long as he's not indicted, he bets he's golden.

In the meantime, he's calculating the angles and working the phones. For now, it looks like Huma is on board, but even if she dumps him he can do a mea culpa and play the sympathy card--"therapy" is the perfect cover for such bullshit.

If he's indicted, it's over. If the polls go seriously south, it's over. In that event, he's calling in favors right now for a plan B--lobbyist, talking head, consultant, God knows.

He'll come out on his feet, and he doesn't care who gets hurt. He's a sociopath.

Fred4Pres said...

AllenS--yes in deed. Well said.

AllenS said...

And, Fred, they would probably turn out to be just as normal as her emails.

Luther said...

I think those pictures in the House gym sum it all up. The man has never met a mirror he didn't fall in love with.

And, why else would he take those pictures other than to use them in a power for sex trade. What a weasel.

Browndog said...

AllenS said...

And, Fred, they would probably turn out to be just as normal as her emails.

Yes, but as Molly Ball astutely pointed out in Politico, it just reveals how evil she has become...

Fred4Pres said...

You forgot about going into treatment so he gets HIPPA protection.

KK: Knock knock.

Person answering: Who's there?

KK: HIPPA.

Person answering: HIPPA who?

KK: I can't tell you.

Jess said...

All of 2, 3, 4, and 5. I apologize if this is not cynical enough. I try to adjust my cynicism levels to match the politicians, but they keep upping their game.

edutcher said...

I'm going with 2, 5, and 6, along with Freeman's 8.

9. Realized nothing's coming out of the Palin emails; in fact, her niceness makes him look that much worse.

Old Dad said...

He's hiding and watching the polls in the home district. So long as he's not indicted, he bets he's golden.

The people in his district are apparently brain-dead, they still love him.

At this point, it's his effect on the party nationally that counts. If Little Zero is being booed by union audiences in Toledo, the skies are becoming very overcast for the Demos.

Themis said...

Who cares about Weiner's reasons for going into treatment? His real problem isn't sex, it's stupidity and there's no treatment for that.

Fred4Pres said...

Old Dad, he is going to lose his district anyway. New York lost two congressional seats in the census. Tradition is one upstate and one from the city...and guess who just got the short straw in the city?

Old Dad said...

Fred4Pres,

That makes sense, but Weiner's been betting longshots for days now.

My guess is we'll see a "negotiated" settlement early next week.

nohype said...

It is not change we can believe in and it is not to cure chronic creepiness. It is the hope to preserve prestigue and power. Pathetic.

Fred4Pres said...

Old Dad: betting the long shots = denial.

He is done. But that he is giving us a summer of scandal is pretty amazing. This may go a month.

And if Weiner admitted right away and apologized on Memorial Day weekend, a lot of this stuff would have still come out but he would not be anyway nearly as damaged. He got his Dem pals to defend them and then he burned him. The Dems do not care about his personal "choices" for the most part, but they will not forgive him for embarassing them. They will proably have his mentor Chucky Schumer deliver the news.

Chuck66 said...

Whenever Bill Clinton would get in trouble, he would go to church. And carry that giant over sized Bible. And carry it on the side that the cameras were on.

He was a master.

I still say Weiner should say he is going in for alcohol treatment. That works usually.

edutcher said...

Chuck66 said...

Whenever Bill Clinton would get in trouble, he would go to church. And carry that giant over sized Bible. And carry it on the side that the cameras were on.

He was a master.


Hardly, it only worked on the super-gullible and Lefties.

AllenS said...

Other than for a wedding or two, neither Bill or Hillary go to church. Not any more that is. Shame onto people who thought that either Clinton had any morals or honor when they went to church when the shit was hitting the fan.

William said...

I predict that Weiner will be on exhibit in public life for years to come. His pathology is exhibitionism. The cure is not worse than the disease. The cure is the disease. The more that is revealed about him, the more the exhibitionist side of his personality battens on the publicity.

GMay said...

7. He's entered into negotiations for a book deal and a sweet, sweet commenting job at HLN.

k*thy said...

I'll go with 2 & 4, along with a twist on 1 - I don't think this is an addiction. I think something else is going on, something some serious psycotherapy could help uncover. The display of something so private in such a public forum, leads me to believe that he actually (subconsciously) wanted to get caught...and I don't doubt that he even knows what that is. In this sense, it seems very similar to Tiger's implosion.

AllenS said...

Hey, garage, got any interesting and embarassing emails from Palin to tell us about?

Auntie Coosa said...

Saul Alinsky Rules for Community Organizers / Radicals

4a. "Make the enemy live up to its own book of rules. You can kill them with this, for they can no more obey their own rules than the Christian church can live up to Christianity."

4b. "Keep your book of rules so degenerate that living down to them becomes an exercise in creative debauchery."

Bob Ellison said...

2.

Carol_Herman said...

Ah, yes. "In treatment." But it didn't revive Tiger Woods' commercial value, did it?

What a crock.

Weiner will need to buy a better camera. One he needs to drag in front of his face. Because, with him, a Blackberry made photography way to easy.

Masturbation? That's not a crime.

Sending the lewd photos to women he didn't know. And, some of them less than 18 years old? That's MADNESS.

He's being treated for politcal suicide.

And, the millions in slush funds he's raised to run, again? Bet cha he can't take the bank account with him!

In Yiddish: A putz is a putz. A schmuck is a schmuk. And, a schlong is a putz on a schvartman.

Who masturbates at a gym? Looking at himself in a mirror?

Ah, it's like a blow job not being sex. And, now, we can define the meaning of "IS" ... As it IS.

LarsPorsena said...

'AllenS said...

Other than for a wedding or two, neither Bill or Hillary go to church. Not any more that is. Shame onto people who thought that either Clinton had any morals or honor when they went to church when the shit was hitting the fan.'

Especially since Sunday after church was set aside for 'special time' with Monica Lewinsky.

Carol_Herman said...

Do the math. It's 2011 now. And, Weiner went to congress in 1998. That's a total of 13 years. And, he's been in government since age 27. These are GOVERNMENT JOBS!

He'll get a disability pension benefit. For which he needs a therapist's signature.

Did you know that Bill Clinton's PENSION BENEFITS from Arkansas and DC ... would raise the hairs on your head ... if you knew the amount?

The guy who lost money is Tiget Woods. Yet he's rich enough to survive as well. Even if he's quitting the golf circuit.

Weiner can always work at Nathan's in Coney Island. "Buy your hot dogs, here" ... And, the job will come with all the free wieners he can eat.

He can go into the consulting business.

And, just like Eliot Spitzer, he can dream of overcoming "Client #9."

You just don't know the animals who hang out in the in-crowd.

Can't fool me.

No sympathy from me, either. (And, I have nothing against masturbation.) Maybe, weiner will sell dildos on line?

ALH said...

2-5, +/- 6.

Dead Julius said...

Treatment for... what... exactly?

Having sexual urges?

There is no treatment for that. That's nature.

Being addicted to sex?

That's just paying too much attention to your urges.

How about moral treatment for lying and conniving and having such an aggrandized sense of self that you see nothing wrong with having virtual sexual liaisons on the Internet, potentially with at least one underage girl, as a married, in-office Congressperson?

That's the "treatment" Weiner needs. But he ain't gonna get it where he's going.

He could get it, though, by resigning from office and then resigning himself to a period of quiet introspection while he gets his life back together.

JAL said...

So why do you care, Professor. You were so sure this was no. big. deal.

Ken said...

It's a combination of everything except number 1. But mostly it's the reaction of a liberal to getting criticized for the first time in his life.

caradoc said...

2 3 4 and 6. It would take a special type of gullibility to buy 1 or 5.

F15C said...

First: 2,4,5 and no doubt, 6 - it's his coping mechanism for Obama's (PBUH) sake.

Second, Weiner would have been far better off right now had he but heeded that age old advice:

"If its your bulge, you must divulge!"

...apologies to Jonny Cochran

Mike M. said...

Mr. Weiner is a disgrace to America, not only his actions, but his attitude as well. He should go into the dildo business, based upon a plaster-cast mold of his own. He can call them "Weiner Wieners".