August 31, 2008

Mouth-corner spittle, in HDTV.

Amanda Hess (via Instapundit) was watching Obama looking nice and "crispy" on HDTV and then, suddenly, there was "a small collection of saliva in the left crease of the candidate’s mouth."
The development nearly incapacitated my housemate; he spent the remainder of the speech in a nervous fit, wishing aloud that one polite delegate would flag down the candidate and discretely wipe his own mouth, the telltale indication that Obama “has got something … right over … no … a little to the left … there, you’ve got it.”...

Near the speech’s end, Obama did move to wipe the corner of his mouth, causing a grand celebration among the party. However, the move only displaced the spittle, helping it to migrate lower down the lip.
Ha ha. This brings back fond memories of blogging for me. From October 13, 2004, live-blogging the last Bush-Kerry debate:
Bush is smiling a lot, and the left side of his mouth nevertheless turns down oddly. A glob of foam forms on the right side of his mouth! Yikes! That's really going to lose the women's vote. [UPDATE: the NYT and the WaPo take note of this, and only this, observation and I react to that attention here....]
And that was without HDTV. That was the first time this blog got quoted in the NYT, so I'm pretty nostalgic about Bush's spittle. But I'm looking back on the vague, fuzzy past. We've got a new crisp guy now and a wrinkly old geezer and, with HDTV, we'll be able to inspect the individual bubbles of any mouth foam.

Think too of the skin blemishes. Everyone's skin will look bad in closeup on HDTV, which brings more clarity than seeing the person in person. It's hyperrealism. And unlike in person, you can get right up close and stare at it and talk to other people in the room about it. And blog about it.

Now, it's going to be important for politicians to wear makeup, strong makeup. Not just a little powder. And then how are they going to look to the people who are around to see them in person? In fact, how are they going to look on HDTV when we can see that they've got on makeup. Garish! Crazy!

Unless....



... they are female.

Ah, finally! A real advantage for women.

Thanks for the technology, guys. We will now use it to rule the world.

ADDED: But Chip Ahoy got out his magnifying glass:

41 comments:

jdeeripper said...

Ah, finally! A real advantage for women.

Thanks for the technology, guys. We will now use it to rule the world.


Right. Like you don't rule it already.

rhhardin said...

Another use for vaseline is putting it on a lens.

rhhardin said...

I remember using my father's Questar across the room to watch the TV screen, which showed about a dozen RGB dots in close focus.

This is less interesting than you may think, but more interesting than standing outside with the mosquitos looking at the moon.

Bissage said...

There are great antagonistic forces at work in the Universe.

For example, a star is the result of nuclear forces pushing out and gravitational forces pulling in.

Another example: We just bought our first HDTV but I’m 45 and my vision’s starting to go and I stubbornly refuse to do anything about it.

Exact same thing.

Jennifer said...

Ha! Nice. Of course, only some women look fabulous on HDTV. Some don't hold up so well.

On a somewhat related note, this VP pick has some of my far left friends turning into raving chauvinists. What accomplishments define her? College athlete? Governor? Nope. Beauty queen. Typical.

Simon said...

I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords...

Quayle said...

I read somewhere that the women in hollywood are not at all happy about HDTV, and that the makeup people are having to substantially revise their craft because of it.

bearbee said...

She seems a common-sense-down-to-earth-wipeup-baby-mouth-spittle kind of person who accepts the human condition for what it is, and if incurring her own episode of mouth spittle during a speech would casually take out her hanky, humorously excuse herself and wipe her mouth without missing a beat.

re: makeup, she has a very clean, crisp look, and if she and McCain do not win the Whitehouse and depending on how she acquits herself (rock star status?), I can imagine the cosmetics industry pursuing her for a line of Palin Cosmetics For The Older Woman.

Meade said...

jdeeripper: Good link. My favorite post.

I could be wrong but something tells me Simon may be finally getting over his Hillarylust.

Simon said...

Meade, what makes you say that (accepting the characterization strictly arguendo)?

Assistant Village Idiot said...

Jennifer - I call them the Arts & Humanities Tribe, who believe that women should only succeed in certain ways. They are different from Science & Technology feminists or Business feminists.

One of my favorite soapboxes, actually...

F15C said...

Jennifer: "On a somewhat related note, this VP pick has some of my far left friends turning into raving chauvinists."

I would argue that this pick did not *turn* them into chauvinists, rather the choice of Palin merely re-exposed the vast underbelly of chauvinism and sexism inherent in today's leftist. The focus of that chauvinism merely shifted from Hllary to Palin and because Palin is a Republican there will be no holding back - it is going get far uglier than what we saw against Hillary. This behavior is inbred in too many of today's liberals just as the choice of Obama exposed the left as home to racism and bigotry. Values and beliefs are secondary to dogma and any attack no matter how insidious is 'justified' by their hatred of Bush and the right.

Paul Zrimsek said...

1080p killed the 480i star.

Ron said...

Thanks for the technology, guys. We will now use it to rule the world.

Hey, sweetie, (Barack said it was OK to use "sweetie", right?) anything for you! Now, where's dinner?

peter hoh said...

Great post, Ann.

Simon wins with his 10:40 comment.

bjm said...

jdee, not quite yet but we're working on it.

I think the Dems are about to discover what most men in long term relationships already know: when Mama ain't happy, nobody is happy.

Not that W. said...

Uh, Ann, make-up disasters can be even worse in high def, as you'll see in the coming weeks. And I know you think someone as gorgeous as Palin can't possible have spittle. Just like someone like you can't possibly lose it on bloggingheads, right?

Well that chestnut is there forever, professor, and so will all of Palin's missteps.

Meanwhile, I hope your son who loves Hillary enjoyed the way her name got booed--oh, those classy Repeblicans!--when Palin tried to credit the more qualifed women who have come before her.

Bissage said...

My vote goes to PZ's 12:07.

rhhardin said...

That smile is a fake smile, by the way.

I myself avoid smiling unless I mean it.

Greg Toombs said...

Thanks for the technology, guys. We will now use it to rule the world.

Until wrinkles rule. Can we spot the botox stabs?

I read somewhere that the women in hollywood are not at all happy about HDTV, and that the makeup people are having to substantially revise their craft because of it.

OTOH, plastic surgeons will have to declare their party allegiances up front. And maybe travel with the campaigns.

BTW, this development is not good for Hillary.

mcg said...

That smile is a fake smile, by the way.

I myself avoid smiling unless I mean it.


Which I'll bet is less often than most of us, sourpuss! :)

(Is that smiley real or fake?)

mcg said...

Time article: For TV Stars, HIgh Def Is Dicey

D said...

The people really unhappy about HD are porn actresses. They already had a pretty short career span - if a woman was 30 she was pretty much done. HD takes that down to about 25.

Simon said...

d - not necessarily.

Ron said...

Simon! Keeping up with the porn tech curve! I salute you, sir!

LoafingOaf said...

Amanda Hess (via Instapundit) was watching Obama looking nice and "crispy" on HDTV and then, suddenly, there was "a small collection of saliva in the left crease of the candidate’s mouth."

This happens to Chris Matthews all the time. I've even seen spit flying when he's in full motor-mouth mode.

Captain Nerd said...

10:27 rhhardin,
So, why would mosquitos be looking at the moon?

William said...

When Hillary made her big appearance during the convention, her lack of blemishes and wrinkles was noticeable and suspicious. It was good work on the make-up artist's part but it robbed Hillary of her humanity. I think Merkel of Germany is the way to go. Her face looks comfortable, kind, and companionable. The Democrats who mock Palin for competing in a beauty contest, should check out Pelosi and Hillary. They're competing in a pageant that ended ten years ago, and no one told them....Kindness and companionability are to an older woman what t & a are to a younger.

Sam said...

So can someone with good research skills pull up some credible information (birth certificate, etc.) and quash these Bristol Palin baby-rumors before they get out of hand?

Ann Althouse said...

A female politician shouldn't look too young, and she shouldn't have fake-looking plastic surgery or caked on makeup. I think there's some kind of spackle-like substance some of these women are using. (Check out the area under the eyes of Mary Matalin next time she's on TV.)

The idea is to have an attractively aged but not tired-looking face. What makeup does is make the skin tone even and unblemished. You still have some lines. We will learn to admire them and see them as a sign of wisdom and experience. We need a more well-developed aesthetic of female aging, and that will develop as we get used to powerful women.

Roy Lofquist said...

Her's Sarah during her singing career:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2ho19VbOiU

vbspurs said...

Said Ann about LancĂ´me's Oscillation mascara:

I guess they were brainstorming about eyes and came up with the idea of "look into my eyes" used in hypnosis

Palin will use it to hypnotise America!!eleventy!

blake said...

Sam,

Those outrageous birth rumors will only help the McCain/Palin ticket the more out of hand they get.

Even if they were true, they wouldn't reflect badly on Palin in most conservatives' eyes. It's only the HYPOCRISY!-sputtering left that cares.

That's why they're trying to find pix of Palin in a bikini. Because they really, truly, genuinely believe that the right is anti-sex, anti-sexiness, and so fire-and-brimstone about pre-marital sex that this will turn them off.

Rope-a-dope!

vbspurs said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
vbspurs said...

Blake, behold the mother of MILFs (heh).

Segolene Royal.

It didn't help even with the French.

memomachine said...

Hmmmm.

@ Not That W.

"Meanwhile, I hope your son who loves Hillary enjoyed the way her name got booed--oh, those classy Repeblicans!--when Palin tried to credit the more qualifed women who have come before her."

They didn't boo the reference to Hillary.

Clean the crap out of your ears and try listening to it again.

blake said...

Victoria,

Your link didn't work.

I assume it was this, though.

And isn't that just the epitome of sexism, when we've had this for the past several months!

vbspurs said...

That was the one, Blake. You know you're in trouble, when even the French reject a half-naked lady.

And isn't that just the epitome of sexism, when we've had this for the past several months!

Good point!

The more recent Hawaii holiday photos actually had the Left Blogosphere complimenting him on losing some body fat.

God forbid he wouldn't look as slim and worthy of men-crushes like JFK.

steve said...

I was at the Dayton event and there was no booing when Palin talked about Ferraro and Hillary. But feel free to tell your little 'story' any way you want. It'll give us a chuckle. You libtards are good for something.

Jim C. said...

For me, the earliest realization of the problems of high resolution was seeing the hosts in Fantasia 2000 in IMAX. The Lidless Eye of the camera coupled with the huge screen flattered no one, not the men and not Bette Midler and Angela Lansbury.

Think not that you will be spared, woman, for the Lidless Eye will see you in turn and capture all of your flaws for eternity.

:D

blake said...

Victoria--

Well, if I'm going to dally with a hot French activist, it's not gonna be Segolane, it's going to be Sabine.